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The first thing to do when you hurt someone is to forgive yourself. You have to do that even before seeking out forgiveness from that person or else you would be haunted by that thing for a long time. You have to let it go bro

Since you've accepted that the problem is from you and you think you don't deserve her, please let her go, it shows that you still need to get mature in relationship matters and you can't afford to hurt her more in your learning stage now. Find a better place and time to explain thing to her so that she can understand. I know she will feel even more hurt but she will be ok over time. By the time she looks back, she will be happy for it because issues like what had happened before might still surface and it will get much more unbearable by then. Let her go now.