What is the one thing you regret having not asked your spouse before marriage?

We have all heard and seen how marriages which is meant to be enjoyed being endured by many women and men too.

Sometimes the marriages end within few months.

Most of these marriages could have been salvaged and prevented from ending abruptly if necessary questions were asked before the wedding.

This brings me to asked the married people (and matured peopel as well), what is that question or discussion you wish you have asked or had before you married your spouse?

Matured comments please.

I AM NOT MARRIED

I can't think of anything. We talked about everything: job, kids, extended family, finance, sex, projects,etc.

Maybe we should have talked a little more about his attitude to work. He works too hard, always cancelling vacations and postponing leaves(I used to think his work is more important, but now I am used to it. Had to learn his work, that way I can help out). Aside that, he's almost perfect, a wonderful husband and father to us. In another life, it has to be him, if not _ I rather be a fish or lion.

Oh, thanks for all the well wishes.

For those that are waiting to hear regrets, are you implying there are no marriages without regrets? Are your parents regretting theirs? Are you regretting yours? Then tell us about it. No marriage is perfect, no human is perfect either _but some of us have looked beyond minor faults/fights to make it work, while complementing each other. Since una wan hear bad things.

1. My husband has a way of putting work first. This caused lots of quarrel in our very early years.
2. He is hot tempered.
3. He isn't a risk taker (i.e)very cautious in investment and decison making.
4. Slow to apology
I noticed all this before marriage though and he has improved. Shey una dey happy now? Una no dey like see happy marriage or where man love him wife die.

In all, I think it's all about sincerity, understanding and patience. Without this, no matter the questions asked pre-marriage _there'll still be issues.

PaperLace:
I can't think of anything. We talked about everything: job, kids, extended family, finance, sex, projects,etc.

Maybe we would have talked a little more about his attitude to work. He works too hard, always cancelling vacations and postponing leaves. Aside that, he's almost perfect, a wonderful husband and father to us. In another life, it has to be him, if not _ I rather be a fish or lion.

Hmmm,

for you to eulogies ur man dis way I can see he is every every,

3 ghosa!!! for d man harvesting ur potato.

Will he ever stopped loving me?

God is faithful.

PaperLace:
I can't think of anything. We talked about everything: job, kids, extended family, finance, sex, projects,etc.

Maybe we would have talked a little more about his attitude to work. He works too hard, always cancelling vacations and postponing leaves. Aside that, he's almost perfect, a wonderful husband and father to us. In another life, it has to be him, if not _ I rather be a fish or lion.

As an Ijawman, I will gladly eat you!!!

Hmm..very informative thread.. please married folks keep the comments flowing let us learn

Failure to plan is like planning to fail!


Asking questions from one's spouse before marriage is one of the ways of planning for what to expect in such marriage and how one can handle such situations if and when they occur!

So many marriages failing unnecessarily today are mostly as a result of not knowing the other person ENOUGH before tying the knot and also not knowing how the other person will handle certain situations when and if they occur!

Though plans change, people changes as well but asking necessary questions before marriage and the types of responses provided help a great deal in discovering much about the type of person one is dealing with and the level of responsibility of the individual!

Going into the marriage without being convinced of the real person one is about to enter life contract with is like intentionally walking into visible flames with the excuse that the fire will quench once you walk into it!



To the question, I doubt if there's any area left untouched that we didn't question ourselves on before marriage, even to the extent of what the other person will do if one of us dies. Though, some things like sex of the children changed but that wasn't our deliberate doing. Also, the state of the economy also change certain decisions we've taken before marriage, that also ain't our doing!


All in all, he has been the man of his words, he has been acting according to the responses I got when questioning him and the same with me, that's one of the reasons our marriage has been so splendid! He's so matured, very tolerant, faithful and honest! In fact,, God bless the day I met him!


12yrs+ and seems we're still dating!



To those planning marriage, ask questions from yourselves, it's your marriage, it's your right! If not convinced enough, postpone or breakup, a broken engagement is better than a broken marriage!


I'm honestly not happy with what has become the sacred marriage institution these days!

May God help us all!

TonyeBarcanista:

As an Ijawman, I will gladly eat you!!!

This is sexual, Tonye.

Acheron:
This is sexual, Tonye.

Eating fish is sexual?

Nice topic

TonyeBarcanista:
As an Ijawman, I will gladly eat you!!!

my second baba

oya talk your own abi u never still marry my mama ni

where are those claiming married they should come over here oh.

optional1:



my second baba


oya talk your own abi u never still marry my mama ni

Who be your mama? Because na the pikin I de wait make she grow before I do the needful

TonyeBarcanista:

Who be your mama? Because na the pikin I de wait make she grow before I do the needful

my mama nah
ur baby mama

Her pikin don grow oh, so tey she don even get boifrnd and the boifrnd dey plan to come see you for wedding list

optional1:



my mama nah
ur baby mama

Her pikin don grow oh, so tey she don even get boifrnd and the boifrnd dey plan to come see you for wedding list

I will reject the boifriend



Cos I also have interest

optional1:
where are those claiming married they should come over here oh.

Not every marriages have regrets. I'm enjoying mine, in fact, she's God's sent.... Everything is perfect, except she has a question which I doubt.

Exponental:

Not every marriages have regrets. I'm enjoying mine, in fact, she's God's sent.... Everything is perfect, except she has a question which I doubt.

So what major question or discussion did you have thats making you enjoy your marriage?

TonyeBarcanista:
I will reject the boifriend


Cos I also have interest

lolz
interest on you lil baby Abi you have arrange an ijaw oil tycoon for her.

optional1:



lolz

interest on you lil baby
Abi you have arrange an ijaw oil tycoon for her.

Don't worry, the oil tycoon will sponsor the ceremony

Exponental:

Not every marriages have regrets. I'm enjoying mine, in fact, she's God's sent.... Everything is perfect, except she has a question which I doubt.

congrats


God bless your home.

TonyeBarcanista:
Don't worry, the oil tycoon will sponsor the ceremony

hian
lemme go and tell your baby mama your plan.

TonyeBarcanista:
Don't worry, the oil tycoon will sponsor the ceremony

hian
lemme go and tell your baby mama your plan.

optional1:



hian

lemme go and tell your baby mama your plan.

Also tell her to give her blessing

TonyeBarcanista:
Also tell her to give her blessing

aha

eleyin o gidi gan o...


She can't give out her blessings oh.

His family's mental history.

KanwuliaExtra:
His family's mental history.

Lol

PaperLace:
I can't think of anything. We talked about everything: job, kids, extended family, finance, sex, projects,etc.

Maybe we should have talked a little more about his attitude to work. He works too hard, always cancelling vacations and postponing leaves(I used to think his work is more important, but now I am used to it. Had to learn his work, that way I can help out). Aside that, he's almost perfect, a wonderful husband and father to us. In another life, it has to be him, if not _ I rather be a fish or lion.

Lord I pray for this kind of family that they Luv themselves and you. Amen

While dating we discussed everything about family and our various expectations in marriage, from then till now, everything has been splendid, seems as if we are still honeymooning, I bless God daily for making us found each other. 10+ years and still counting, every day na romance. Baba God should pick our calls and bless our union with children that's all, even with this, I dey gbadun the marriage, I return back all the glory to God alone who makes all things beautiful.

Purelady:
While dating we discussed everything about family and our various expectations in marriage, from then till now, everything has been splendid, seems as if we are still honeymooning, I bless God daily for making us found each other. 10+ years and still counting, every day na romance. Baba God should pick our calls and bless our union with children that's all, even with this, I dey gbadun the marriage, I return back all the glory to God alone who makes all things beautiful.

Amen to your desire.

Wow
So much so good stories
Now I wonder where the bad spouses come from

God bless una marriage over and over


Sisisioge
I hope you are asking questions already