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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children (1554 Views)
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Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by BigBashiru: 1:33am On Sep 28, 2020 |
Wives oya comment. I thought una say till death do us part?? |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by ollymooreagain: 2:39am On Sep 28, 2020 |
Before till death do us apart Now till money finish ni o |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by frozen70(f): 4:04am On Sep 28, 2020 |
Stop making mockery of sensetive issues like this No one goes to marriage to get divorced and no child was born with the intentions of being in a broken marriage Go and get married and experience what it is 14 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by tobechi74: 6:31am On Sep 28, 2020 |
Do you want the husband to kill her Marriage is not for every one yet we insist.divorce is the end product Marriage is an individual choice and not a collective one. The government has no business regulating how I use my genital. It is mine and mine alone. I decide who I choose to get married to . I can decide to share it with a single person or a married person. It is my freedom to choose to be a celibate or be married. While married, I decide with my partner whether to make it open relationship or monogamy. Marriage is not for everyone. There are people who are happier single. I mean those who are do introverted that they cannot tolerate a very long time without feeling drained. There are people who prefer long distance relationship with few visits and frequent absence rather than continued presence. those whose high attention sexual urge cannot be satisfied by any one individual. There are others who dislike the boredom of sticking to one partner scares the hell out of them. Variety is the spice of life.The fun of experimenting with various sizes and types thrills them. There are yet another group whose need for independence and freedom makes them dislike the idea of consulting with another before making decision. There is another group that love to be in motion. They wake up one morning and decide to relocate to another state only to explore another culture the next year. Traveling is their hobby and getting married with kids hinders that . Settling down is like a death trap. Flowing water is cleaner. Stagnant water attracts mosquitoes and other microorganism. Human needs are various. the concept of getting married does not fit into their ideal future. They are better off single or in an open relationship. imposing monogamy marriage on them will choke them. Their partner and children would suffer . Cheating is bound to occur. The fact that cheating still exist means we should question the effectiveness of monogamy and possibility of open marriage. Investment experts would advice you never to put all your eggs in one basket to mitigate against risk. Economic expert suggest diversification and not depending on only crude oil. Why don’t we Apply the same analogy to our own emotional life. Risk is mitigated when we stop expecting one person to be our confident, sexual satisfier ,friend, mother of children etc. Can we consider open marriage and celibacy as alternative to monogamy .https://tobechispeaks./2020/09/19/why-is-monogamy-considered-natural/ 3 Likes |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by BigBashiru: 11:34am On Sep 28, 2020 |
frozen70: There is a statistical trend of a high percentage of divorcees even when the husband is not abusive or violent - in many instances the wives are extremely religious.... I'm trying to understand why a woman with children will wake up one day and say she is no longer doing..... |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by pocohantas(f): 12:57pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
BigBashiru: Yes, I have also observed the growing trend of such divorce cases. My guess is, some of these women want kids, companionship, but not marriage. However, they can’t say it with their full chest in a country like Nigeria and they know the long run effect of having these kids from various men. So they go into marriages and leave after having kids. It isn’t a coincidence that they always have kids first. Better a divorcee than babymama. Anyway, it shouldn’t be much of a problem that women are leaving marriages. After all, men claim to gain nothing from marriage and are also not interested in marrying Nigerian women anymore. 16 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by bukatyne(f): 1:24pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
pocohantas: So they have the companionship with different men after divorce? Not surprised at the trend. 3 Likes |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by bukatyne(f): 1:30pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
frozen70: Sadly, not everyone marries for 'forever'. Some do it to leave the spinster/bachelor group. Some to have 'legitimate kids.' The kids and the partner 'deceived' of the other's intent are the victims. |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by BigBashiru: 1:30pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
pocohantas: thanks for this insight pocahontas! And yes i agree Nigeria is still a strong partriarchy which isnt good for woman empowerment. This choice of going into marriage and leaving after having kids is actually somewhat tied to biology - I will expand this response a bit in a few hours so you can get my point of view - and I am not judgemental of anyone and the choices they make - it is just interesting how biology ties into both male and female behavior - check back soon! |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by Sabicleaners: 1:48pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
Hmmn! Let's just they got what they are looking for and didn't see any reason to stay married especially when the marriage is not giving them joy. Do you need a Weekend cleaner for that your fine house? Do you need someone to come three times weekly to clean your beautiful apartment? Do you need professional cleaners to come clean and disinfect that nice house you just rented before you pack in? Do you need our cleaners to give your house a professional cleaning touch every month. SabiCleaners is the best cleaning service plug in Abuja that can give your house that sparkling touch you deserve. Our prices are affordable for the premium service we offer. Check my sig |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by Klass99(f): 4:20pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
. 1 Like |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by crackhaus: 5:04pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
BigBashiru:Are you talking about separation here or divorce? If it is the latter, as in the one achieved in a court, then there is always a reason, and it has to be credible enough before any Nigerian court will grant the divorce. The concept of no-fault divorces are not commonplace within the Nigerian legal system... such is more perculiar in places like the UK. On the other hand, if what you mean is just the usual separation, as in, a married couple who are now living apart... although there may be a good reason for it which you may not be aware of, it would make more sense here that a man/woman could just easily separate from their spouse without a strong enough reason. (Note: separate, NOT divorce). 3 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by BigBashiru: 7:49pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
Klass99: When some babes want to pull the stunt Pocahontas has described, they often blame the husband (so guys pls don't feel bad if u have reasonably done ur best b4 God and man).... it's a way to rationalize their action to not make themselves feel bad.... 1 Like |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by KevinDein: 7:53pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
I probably won't lose a night's sleep if my wife divorces after even a year. Just an opportunity to wife a younger woman ![]() Blue pilled simps don't know such women are doing them a favour ![]() |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by bukatyne(f): 9:25pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
KevinDein: Interesting. Is this the male version of 'I don't need no man' song after heartbreak? ![]() 3 Likes |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by Dainy1(m): 9:42pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
@op, get married first |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by BigBashiru: 10:06pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
crackhaus: I mean both marriage and or separation - they no longer on good terms |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by BigBashiru: 10:08pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
bukatyne: I agree - u can imagine walking down the aisle while the other partner has other plans.... |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by culf: 11:09pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
frozen70: gbam |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by BigBashiru: 11:29pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
pocohantas:"Attraction is natures way of holding together our minds and bodies for long enough so that we mate with someone with good genes". Human beings are omnivorous primates of the order homo sapiens. Most things in humans consumate in sex as with the lower animals - could it be that marriage is actually unnatural and is only needed for procreation? Could it be biological? |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by crackhaus: 11:42pm On Sep 28, 2020 |
BigBashiru:I think you have answered yourself. If they're no longer on good terms, then it's a good reason to separate. |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by BigBashiru: 12:03am On Sep 29, 2020 |
crackhaus:You seem not to understand the premise of this thread - pocahontas understands the thrust of the question - please lets wait for her to comment further. thanks ![]() |
Re: Why Wives Divorce Their Husbands After 2-3 Children by crackhaus: 7:18am On Sep 29, 2020 |
BigBashiru:Lol, you're the one who doesn't seem to know where you want to stand on your own thread. First, you claimed that men did absolutely nothing (not abusive or violent) and the women involved are "extremely" religious, yet they wake up one day and say they are done with the marriage... then in a next response, you say it's because they were not on good terms – These are two very different premises. The 'character' you're mentioning as having the understanding you require obviously played along with your first insinuation that women enter marriages just to get divorced for absolutely no reason after 2/3 kids, because that is what satisfies her bias – a bias that women do not need marriage anymore, which in fact everyone knows to be completely false as far as Nigeria is concerned. It's only on NL that women don't want to get/stay married, enter street and observe real life... The second respondent on the thread actually captured it succinctly with this line to you: No one goes to marriage to get divorced And even if a few did, it is in the minority... Meaning it's not a trend at all, but more like the outlier. To be honest, even as an outlier, it's almost non-existent especially because Nigerian divorce laws are not as beneficial (financially) to women when compared to some other countries. There's also the divorced woman stigma in Nigeria to be factored into it. Nigerian women would rather remain married & manage it until it gets to a boiling point before they finally decide to leave, this is the reality NOT that narrative you and your friend above are trying to spin. A divorceé and a babymama get almost the same level of stigma... and even if one were to contrast the two, it's actually being a babymama that's more in vogue when compared to being a divorced woman, not the other way round. If you had said western women go into marriage simply to get divorced for absolutely no reason after 2/3 kids, we won't be having this conversation. It's not a Nigerian women thing at all, not even a little bit. 2 Likes 1 Share |
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