bepositive11:


Your comments are always based on your own personal beliefs and personal experiences. What is wrong with a man and woman contributing financially to raise their family?

If a man needs to provide financially in order for his family to respect him, they don't respect that man at all. They only respect his money.

And what is wrong with a woman supporting a man to achieve his dreams? Financial support is not the only kind of support. There's also emotional and psychological support.

They built each other up together as a couple.

I just want to say something.

We are in Nigeria, no woman will share the bills with you...stop the fantasies, the moment, your wife starts sharing the bills with you, you are no more a husband to her but a partner and dont expect her to listen to you or respect you, also as a man you are looking for a wife not a partner.

Nobody will respect you if you dont have money, this applies to both in Nigeria and outside Nigeria, do you noticed that even parents love the successful child, they listen to that child and take the child advice...it is just nature.

The man with lot of resources will be respected and even given power.

A man does not wait for a woman to support his dreams, he go for his dreams. Sorry to burst your bubbles, there is no woman out there that will support your dreams emotional or psychological. Most women are more of it is either me or your dreams...choose one.

cococandy:
Okay so if his wife can’t do it then he’ll get somebody to do it. meaning he needs someone to do it in order for him to succeed. If his wife were dead and no one agreed to come do it, wouldn’t he be stuck with tiny tots too dependent on him for his to successfully go do something else?

Telling you that you are slow is not abuse. It’s just a fact of the matter. That’s why people who think like you don’t respect your own mothers. Because you don’t value yourselves and you think her raising you means nothing. It contributed nothing to the family since you’re not a valuable part of the family. The only thing you value is money and only the person who brought money has value.

And as usual when you feel your illogical thought processes being called into question, the person who’s pointing it out is being emotional.

Oh you went to Zanzibar? Congratulations

As i said you are always living in fantasies and not in tune with reality.

There are many men out there who were/are successful before they met their wives.

The thing you fail to realise is that a man does not need a woman to be successful, after all there are many successful single guys without a woman in their lives.

As for the scenario you brought up, there are also men whose wives died during childbirth, did that stop the man from achieving his dreams? ..No, there are always people willing to help, as i wrote earlier he can also get a paid nanny to take care of the child.

Indeed! People like me dont respect mothers, as if it is only mothers that raise a child, every guinue mothers know that the support of finances of the man makes the family runs smoothly, the day the man stops that, the mother can turn the kids against the father even though he has sacrificed alot for the family...this is one thing your biased and emotional mind wont accept.

Or do you want to say, money isn't important...you see how hypocritical you are. As if you can marry a penniless man considering the fact that you are an igbo girl and a man with money is highly valued in your culture.

When did I say money isn’t important?

You’re projecting because you erroneously and ignorantly said the women’s contributions don’t matter if it’s not money. What a stupid asinine opinion.

And what happens when the woman can and does make money too? Like millions of women currently do? I mean why is your “logical” mind glossing over the fact that many women contribute financially towards the home? And even if they didn’t, they do things that only them can do. which makes the man’s life so much easier and helps them be successful in their chosen careers. How can a man benefit from all that and then claim he built his success alone. You slow or what?

Calling me emotional because it’s an easy-to-regurgitate insult that many of you low IQ niqqas like to use on women doesn’t change the fact that you only have opinions that imbeciless can have.

If you really think your mother and the women in your lives didn’t contribute anything because it wasn’t monetary, try paying for every single service they provide you and your family. From child care to house keeping, to cooking and cleaning, planning, advising, emotional support, personal shopper, sexual gratification . Come back and tell us how far your pocket can go.

What an ignorant dumba$$.

Okonandmary:


As i said you are always living in fantasies and not in tune with reality.

There are many men out there who were/are successful before they met their wives.

The thing you fail to realise is that a man does not need a woman to be successful, after all there are many successful single guys without a woman in their lives.

As for the scenario you brought up, there are also men whose wives died during childbirth, did that stop the man from achieving his dreams? ..No, there are always people willing to help, as i wrote earlier he can also get a paid nanny to take care of the child.

Indeed! People like me dont respect mothers, as if it is only mothers that raise a child, every guinue mothers know that the support of finances of the man makes the family runs smoothly, the day the man stops that, the mother can turn the kids against the father even though he has sacrificed alot for the family...this is one thing your biased and emotional mind wont accept.

Or do you want to say, money isn't important...you see how hypocritical you are. As if you can marry a penniless man considering the fact that you are an igbo girl and a man with money is highly valued in your culture.

cococandy:
When did I say money isn’t important?

You’re projecting because you erroneously and ignorantly said the women’s contributions don’t matter if it’s not money. What a stupid asinine opinion.

And what happens when the woman can and does make money too? Like millions of women currently do? I mean why is your “logical” mind glossing over the fact that many women contribute financially towards the home? And even if they didn’t, they do things that only them can do. which makes the man’s life so much easier and helps them be successful in their chosen careers. How can a man benefit from all that and then claim he built his success alone. You slow or what?

Calling me emotional because it’s an easy-to-regurgitate insult that many of you low IQ niqqas like to use on women doesn’t change the fact that you only have opinions that imbeciless can have.

If you really think your mother and the women in your lives didn’t contribute anything because it wasn’t monetary, try paying for every single service they provide you and your family. From child care to house keeping, to cooking and cleaning, planning, advising, emotional support, personal shopper, sexual gratification . Come back and tell us how far your pocket can go.

What an ignorant dumba$$.

You are the one that is ignorant.

And nobody said the a woman contribution isn't important. You are the one projecting that and trying hard to dismiss the role of men in the family.

Your idea is that because a woman poops out baby, according to you, she is above criticism and all men should bow their head for her as if it doesn't take a man and a woman to bring a child to the world.

You can not use childbirth to down play the role of men in the family.

FYI there are also many women out there who go about aborting the child in their stomach, dumping their children in the dustbins and committing crimes against children.

On the issue of women working, In Nigeria here, there are more male (65.67%) wage earners than females (34.33%)

It is true that there are millions of women working, the facts is that majority of these women are working in low paying jobs and most will be stucked there. if they are single, it is even harded for them to live a normal life, most of these women, their salaries will not be enough to support a family , that is why they always dream for a man that earn well.

On the issue of success, a man does not need a woman to be successful in his field of career, so because a woman clean, give him sex, shop and wash, how does that help in making the man more money or in being successful. Or have you forgotten that in many homes, many women do not clean, do not wash, do not give emotional support, they nag, starve the man of sex and the man still goes on to be successful in his field. i know you wont admit this because you are more interested in pushing the fairy tales narrative gotten from Nigerian movies.

Lets get it right, most men have been working before they met their wives, when they have kids, the man still have to go out to his job to earn his salary, if the man wants a higher pay, then he has to further his education to get a new high paying job or promotion...literally this is the man decision, how then did the woman help in making him successful career wise. If the woman wasn't in his life, he will still progress in his career.

An actor goes out to location for a movie, so that he can earn a living, after shooting, he goes home to his family with his pay, he gives some to his wife, she prepares a meal, the man goes out for another role in another location, after filming, the pay isn't enough for a good meal but he still comes home and give his wife some of the money, she nags and abuses him, the actor is pissed but then decided to find for a supporting job as a voice over artist in addition to his acting job, when he combines both pay, he can provide a meal for 4 days.

The wife sees the increase, her nagging reduces, the actor continues his job and still bringing in the same pay, fortunately for him, he got a bigger gig, got paid millions and went home, he told his wife, wife started listing demands, the actor said No, wife starts to blackmail the man with how she take care of the children and other bla bla, the man stands his ground, the wife knowing that her husband wont changed his mind, continues to make life difficult for the man until her demand is met. The actor continues to improve himself and ends up becoming the most paid actor in the industry.

My question to you is how did the woman make the man successful?

In the real world, if his wife manages his career or help in getting acting roles, then she has a claim in the man success other than that i see no reason why a woman will lay a claim to a man success because she took care of the kids. That is why it is more easier for a man to leave his wife for another woman without guilt and also that is why it is easy for the man family to claim his property after his death.

Okonandmary:


My question to you is how did the woman make the man successful?

Let me dumb it down for you. In primary school structure so that you can understand it.

First of all yes if he didn’t have the woman he would be successful because he’s single and only has to worry about himself. Same way the woman would be successful with only herself to worry about.

But the moment they chose to create a family with someone else, that family is their responsibility not just the woman’s responsibility. Those kids are his dependents. They don’t belong to the wife alone. For him to leave all the childcare to his wife means his wife is relieving him of a huge responsibility that might have been a stumbling block to his path and career success.

The fact that he can get up and go out without anything holding him down from going and coming and participating in his career the way he wishes to is a very huge part of why he’s successful.

If he stayed up all night because a crying baby wouldn’t let him sleep, he wouldn’t have the strength or presence of mind to get up and be mentally/physically active the next few hours.

That he can come back and see food ready for him. Food that he didn’t have to plan, look up recipes, make a shopping list, go buy grocery and then spend hours making already made his career so much easier. If you can’t see the connection, then I really wonder how you think of yourself as a smart contributor here. Where’s this your confidence coming from?

He wakes up to go do the amazing career in clean clothes that he didn’t spend hours washing and organizing. His children are taken care of. He doesn’t have to interrupt his schedule for them because mom’s got it. You don’t see how that contributes to his career?. In your one track mind, anyone that’s not there acting with him and securing acting gigs for him didn’t contribute to his career.

And hilariously enough you imagine yourself to be the one who’s thinking deeply. How deep thinking are you if your mind can’t make basic connections? Deep in the sewers it seems.

I said it before. it’s because the only thing you value is money that’s why someone taking a huge responsibility that belongs to both of you upon themselves doesn’t mean anything to you.

cococandy:

Let me dumb it down for you. In primary school structure so that you can understand it.

First of all yes if he didn’t have the woman he would be successful because he’s single and only has to worry about himself. Same way the woman would be successful with only herself to worry about.

But the moment they chose to create a family with someone else, that family is their responsibility not just the woman’s responsibility. Those kids are his dependents. They don’t belong to the wife alone. For him to leave all the childcare to his wife means his wife is relieving him of a huge responsibility that might have been a stumbling block to his path and career success.

The fact that he can get up and go out without anything holding him down from going and coming and participating in his career the way he wishes to is a very huge part of why he’s successful.

If he stayed up all night because a crying baby wouldn’t let him sleep, he wouldn’t have the strength or presence of mind to get up and be mentally/physically active the next few hours.

That he can come back and see food ready for him. Food that he didn’t have to plan, look up recipes, make a shopping list, go buy grocery and then spend hours making already made his career so much easier. If you can’t see the connection, then I really wonder how you think of yourself as a smart contributor here. Where’s this your confidence coming from?

He wakes up to go do the amazing career in clean clothes that he didn’t spend hours washing and organizing. His children are taken care of. He doesn’t have to interrupt his schedule for them because mom’s got it. You don’t see how that contributes to his career?. In your one track mind, anyone that’s not there acting with him and securing acting gigs for him didn’t contribute to his career.

And hilariously enough you imagine yourself to be the one who’s thinking deeply. How deep thinking are you if your mind can’t make basic connections? Deep in the sewers it seems.

I said it before. it’s because the only thing you value is money that’s why someone taking a huge responsibility that belongs to both of you upon themselves doesn’t mean anything to you.

Both whites and African males are completely oblivious to thier privilege

envoymedia:
Actor Yul Edochie's first wife, May Edochie has shared photos of herself and her four children as they celebrate Christmas together, IGBERETV reports.

She captioned the photos on Instagram;

Walt a second... what is this woman's claim to fame? What is her husband's abeg?

GloriousGbola:


Both whites and African males are completely oblivious to thier privilege

Someone said “black men are the white people of the black community”
And nothing could be truer when you actually think of it.

Completely oblivious. Must be very nice. Isn’t it?

cococandy:

Let me dumb it down for you. In primary school structure so that you can understand it.

First of all yes if he didn’t have the woman he would be successful because he’s single and only has to worry about himself. Same way the woman would be successful with only herself to worry about.

But the moment they chose to create a family with someone else, that family is their responsibility not just the woman’s responsibility. Those kids are his dependents. They don’t belong to the wife alone. For him to leave all the childcare to his wife means his wife is relieving him of a huge responsibility that might have been a stumbling block to his path and career success.

The fact that he can get up and go out without anything holding him down from going and coming and participating in his career the way he wishes to is a very huge part of why he’s successful.

If he stayed up all night because a crying baby wouldn’t let him sleep, he wouldn’t have the strength or presence of mind to get up and be mentally/physically active the next few hours.

That he can come back and see food ready for him. Food that he didn’t have to plan, look up recipes, make a shopping list, go buy grocery and then spend hours making already made his career so much easier. If you can’t see the connection, then I really wonder how you think of yourself as a smart contributor here. Where’s this your confidence coming from?

He wakes up to go do the amazing career in clean clothes that he didn’t spend hours washing and organizing. His children are taken care of. He doesn’t have to interrupt his schedule for them because mom’s got it. You don’t see how that contributes to his career?. In your one track mind, anyone that’s not there acting with him and securing acting gigs for him didn’t contribute to his career.

And hilariously enough you imagine yourself to be the one who’s thinking deeply. How deep thinking are you if your mind can’t make basic connections? Deep in the sewers it seems.

I said it before. it’s because the only thing you value is money that’s why someone taking a huge responsibility that belongs to both of you upon themselves doesn’t mean anything to you.

Lets imagine a woman is a full time house wife, so literally, she cooks, clean, take care of the baby.

The man goes out to work, he earns, rents/buys a house, give money to the wife for cooking/cleaning/taking care of kids,
Take the car out for repairs/clean the car
Repair/fix things at home
Pays for the bills
Settle his family/wife family's financial issues ( black tax)
Pay for the kid school fees

These are the things, he is gonna do forever compare to a woman, after the kids grow up, they go to universities and her burden is lifted while the man continues to provide or do whatever he needs to move the family up the pyramid.

So according to you if the man eventually moves up the pyramid, the success is for both the man and the woman.

Let the role be flipped and what the man get is contempt and hatred. Will the woman include the man into her career success for being supportful, you and i know that the answer is NO.

Btw, someone said Nigerian men are privileged, privileged in what way, considering that some of us will die before 60 because of lack of support system, no societal support and extreme pressure and the fact that majority of working men will spend all their lives caring for their families and paying bills, some might end up with nothing but regrets and hypertension while the woman hold on to her own money and live a great life.

My wife and I were just gisting. We realise that we were judging Yul. From all indications, we can now see that May was running things while in her marriage.

festacman:
Feel like bumping into Yul Edochie right now and giving him a real shellacking. What does he really want in life? Unless na strong juju, why should any man in his right senses leave the company of this lovely family setting because of the kpekus of another man's wife?

Culturally speaking, given that Yul is an Igbo man from Anambra, he is already failing with his first son (Diokpala) and first daughter (Ada) on the opposite side of the table. And with two other sons in tow, he is laying foundation for anarchy in his family line. Only an Anambra man who is senseless or under some strange influence will do this.

Well, today is day of peace. No violence. Merry Xmas to all Nairalanders!