It's not in your place to determine who is a liability or not. You cannot determine the primary duties of every woman when she's not your wife.

Nobody will take care of you like your own parents, take that anywhere.

Irrespective of the way your aunt treated you, it will still be better for your sister to stay at home and be brought up with her own immediate family.

Look at how you left the significant things and started chasing irrelevance

Who cares whether you know how to knot a tie if what you do for a living doesn't call for it.

Send your cousin to therapy if you can afford it.

How can you use an obscene amount of money for rent when you can make a lifetime investment and live rent free? It's simple logic forget all this living with the rich, a wise man once said 'cut your coat according to your cloth'. Don't go and live somewhere where you'll end up with hbp while trying to keep up with the Joneses.

A word is enough for the wise.

And so?

Who will end up with SS kids? You think you're doing me?

Asslicking on a different level

Pee2Jay9:
Yes.. I wrote exams after classes for Project Management certification and still wrote exam for NSE which qualified me to apply for Coren where i submitted a project I was graded on.

Pls do u know someone that have evaluated such? Kindly respond to my email

I don't know anyone who has evaluated such but you can simulate the certificate evaluation on WES website and see what they say.

Your last point @emboldened is golden. Two million savings of 450k salary is paltry

FivePeas:
I think you're being too hasty and would appeal to you not to make a hasty decision that will cause you damage because you sound like someone who's bout to react ( from negative reactions ) rather than someone who's about to embark on a well planned action. There's a difference. Trust me I know.


I qualify to give you sound counsel as a business operator and would like to discredit any thoughts of you quitting you job because of your savings.


Let's take it step by step


1. Financial security is important. Can you reduce your monthly expenses and boost your savings so you can save let's say 300k monthly, which in six months gives you an approximate of another 2 Million Naira


2. Start the process of setting up a business while you're still employed. This way you can weigh the options if it's for you or not. And can easily convert your salaries towards the establishment of the business


3. Do not quit your job until you've had a well to Houghton out business plan and have put it into effect. Remember money is just half the equation, the other half the business


4. Be more tolerant rather than being irritated because things aren't working for you from a place of convenience. Start thinking positive thoughts about the positives of your job. I'm sure it can't be all negative. Whatever it's costing you, give yourself the opportunity to reflect and tell yourself giving it six more months for proper planning won't do you harm


5. Get a second accommodation closer to work. So you can shuttle between both ends. Friday home till Sunday. Have you considered this?


6. Get a nanny and if you can afford it, get a driver too and delegate some of the duties with the kids care to them.


7. Give yourself time. Do not jump to the next thing until that so-called " next thing " has been fully constructed while you're still maintaining the one that looks stressful.



I'm sorry to say, but having just 2 Million Naira savings on a 459k monthly job directly implies you're in a financial crisis already but don't know. And rocking the boat will leave you at the disadvantaged position

kevoh:

I'm sorry I don't understand. Pardon my ignorance, does the COREN certificate give any extra point asides the first degree and Master's?

Did you write an exam to get the certificate? If yes, probably. If no, then no it won't give you points for two certificates or more in addition to your BEng.

saphireadoo:
I appreciate every one who has contributed to this my post.I cant cope with another woman in my home, my husband finances not enough to cater for two families.Honestly speaking men can pretend to death, he has not given me any reason to suspect him. It is true that his family put pressure on him to marry their tribe, his uncle confirmed that to me but if he cant speak for me before his family, how can he defend me and my baby, this is very worrisome. His family are pretenders, they have eaten so much from me and pretended to love me all this while.If he doesnt solve his problem with that village girl, it wont work. I want to hear other people opinion to be sure that iam not over reacting.I have read through all your advise, i appreciate

How can he solve the problem with the village girl? Lemme simplify it for you because it's as if the betrayal is not making you think clearly.

What they have between them is a child. A living, breathing, human that will be in their lives (one way or the other) till they die.

The only choices open to you are living with such knowledge or walking away.

Such negligence

Some people really don't deserve to be parents.

I need to watch this Spartacus

I hope it's interesting

Old story

Yes as humans we are often set in our ways

But tell yourself the truth, you don't love that lady because the natural side effect of love is possessiveness. You cannot love something all encompassingly and leave it to uncertainty.

You simply don't love her enough.

Why is that the only option? You think you'll ever have a good relationship with your child if you're a visiting father? You're setting yourself up to be a stranger to your child and foster hatred in the mind of the child towards you.

LawBreaker:
For now, the only option on my head is the motherless babies. Getting a nanny to stay with me as a single father and raise my child, it won't be funny as I am a single father. Secondly, employing the services of a single mother, I wonder o.

Why is the option of motherless home a bad idea. Pls put me through

Your actions are already in the right place, try to stick to them and see them through.

But be sure that you really want this guy enough to play second fiddle forever (if need be) because what if he never gets over his ex. Even if his mother approves of you, you cannot wipe away his relationship with his ex by just being the chosen one. Be very sure that you can stay with a man who is constantly looking back, wondering 'what if' even when he's with you.

Abroad of course


And I disagree with your second pro for Nigeria. We lack discipline and morality as a nation. Take that anywhere

rentAcock:
Abroad people call me every weekend asking me to send money (not bragging). Many of them are frustrated over there. They work long hours including overtime but the government takes federal, state, city, social security, medicare, medicaid and disability taxes. On top of that, when they buy biscuit, they will still take sales tax. They pay exorbitant rent; those who "own" homes are locked in a loan repayment for 30yrs of which they still have to pay annual taxes for their house. Phone bill can cost over $60 per line, cable $120, internet $80 and they still pay tax on top of it. Burger and chips with soft drink can easily cost you $16 plus tax.

Sure some folks are making over $100,000 theoretically especially healthcare workers in expensive big cities like California and new York, but by the time the deduct all those taxes from their check, they are left with just $40,000. Then they still have to pay more taxes on every thing they buy. That's not life. It's like a rat wheel, oscillating but not making any progress. I have a cousin who was in the same situation in America, after 10yrs working as a social worker, he returned home and we started up a business. He still regrets all the years he spent slaving away in America. Today, he travels the world on vacation and visiting places he didn't even have time to visit when he was living abroad. It's not too late for Nigerians living abroad to return home; you can make it big here with less stress and you will extend your life span.

Nobody asked you all these, always resist the urge to shalaye

Very valid points op and you're quite right.

Bailing friends and family financially is deeply engrained in our system, it even has a name, 'black tax'. It's not something that started today and it won't end anytime soon. So just do what you can and resist the urge to become a saviour at your own detriment. Like a wise man once said "when someone ends up being indebted, it's not because of the family. In many instances they don't themselves understand the limit of their finances. Someone who knows their limit regardless of family pressure will not go over their limit".

Na wa

Typical case of monkey dey work baboon dey chop

Nwaotu:
If you guys don't help me, I will go and commit suicide and post the video on this forum. You guys should dare me and see.

See empty threat
Who cares if you commit suicide? It's obvious you're not emotionally mature.

I deeply empathise with your brother for being from a cruel family like yours.

For God's sake that child has learning disabilities which should be obvious to any slowpoke not to talk of so-called university graduates. How do you expect him to play with his mates when you've all destroyed his self-esteem and made him feel insecure.

You all better rush him to a psychologist and child therapist asap, you've dallied too long already.

I've learned something new today

Thanks op

Yonce:


But why though, if you don't mind me asking?

I mind. Thanks

If na play, abeg stop am


A man like my dad? NEVER

rvpbae:
Is there anyone that can help process unilag msc transcript here?

Yes

Do call 07064762474

You're quite right

iamloyalty:


is the occult part much cos am not a fan of occult?

It's basically what the movie is about

iamloyalty:



If KOB is more intresting Dan it den no need wasting my data to download.

You may have a different view, that's just in my opinion

If only that lady can stick to her gun and flee

Marriage is worth it

Your marriage however, is not