Seun:
Here's a more serious question: what's a woman's birthday and gender after marriage? A wife should adopt her husband's birthday and gender.

Funny

Why will a woman Change her state of origin because of marriage?
I won't even change my father name.

Glory, honour and adoration be to the most high.
Bless God for her life cos it's was only by his grace she was healed.

Depression a very bad sickness.

Happy married life.
This is just a small word,i can vividly remember when you came seeking for advice but see you now celebrating your big day.

From glory to glory and joy to prosperity will be your portion.(amen)
Enjoy your marriage.

STFUareyouGod:
didn't see nada! Check and retry

k

STFUareyouGod:
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha Lwkmd. Is that a compliment? That's an insult dear. Pele

Did you get that thing?

yea.Already sent it.

STFUareyouGod:
And did you insult?

I only said*dumb brain*

STFUareyouGod:
ha! Why dem ban you?

They said I insulted someone.
Till 25th of January.

None of my business.
They must all go to jail.

STFUareyouGod:
flames?

kazi....

STFUareyouGod:
why? What did you do and who are you?

Emi ni joor

Always sex stories,God save you from karashika girls.

STFUareyouGod:
when?

They banned me.

Welcome to my world!!
You are almost done with university,endure for the main time.
My own worst sef.

Those wicked peeps.

Decker:


Okay listen to me. Your heart isn't loveless, don't say that. The more you think you don't possess what it takes to love, the more you'd start believing that. No one is incapable of love. There is love inside of you, you just have to dig deep and access it.

I know it's not easy to forget, sometimes it's impossible to forget, but what you should do is create other positive memories and that would form a sort of covering over the negative ones, so instead of dwelling on those bad experiences, you will have something more enriching to dwell on.

And you won't create these positive memories by being all moody and aloof and afraid to try out a relationship. You should let go of your past.

You said you hate being alone and it's killing you. This means you crave a relationship, but your fear is what's serving as a hindrance. You listen to your friends when they talk about their boyfriends. Don't you want to experience all those good things they talk about? Do they ever mention anything about their boyfriends doing to them what your dad did to your mum? No, so you see you have nothing to be afraid of.

It's not wise to have a negative perception of something when you haven't actually experienced that thing. You should first try out a relationship, and see what it's like being in one, before you even start creating notions and ideas about it, just because of a single experience you witnessed.

Even if you find a guy that you don't love, but loves you, just spend time with him. Do fun and interesting stuff with him, get to know him, and you will see, with time, you would gradually start falling in love with him.

Thanks

Decker:
OP I understand how you feel, I can relate with you.

When I was little, I grew up around some form of physical abuse. But guess what, while I was upset as I witnessed this abuse, I had a sister that such experience didn't seem to affect.

What does this tell you? It shows that we are all wired differently and we differ in the way our minds process such kind of negative information. We all have different emotional barriers; walls built in our subconscious that helps us in shielding away negative emotion and the effects they might have on us. My sister had a stronger emotional barrier than I did.

In spite of all this, I still managed to get over it all. I found a way to gradually build by emotional barrier. How did I do this, I simply put aside the negativity and got hold on the positivity. I spent time dwelling on the good in the world instead of the bad.

Did all what I saw and how I felt change me? Yes, it did, to an extent, but I didn't let all those experiences define my perception of what a relationship should be or how I should treat a woman.

You may or may not actually a psychologist to help you through this. But even if you find one, you have to first believe that you can do it. That you can regain yourself, that you can live above all what you experienced growing up.
A psychologist or therapist can't help you if you don't want to help yourself first.

You have to understand that your dad is just an individual, one man, out of millions of other men. What he did, isn't in anyway a direct representation of the character of men in general. All men aren't like that. The probability that you would ever find any man that would abuse you like your dad did to your mum is very slim.

Fear is what's preventing you from going into a relationship. You should rise above that fear. When next you meet a guy that you are attracted to, please get to know him. See what he has to offer. Whenever you are with him, forget all those experiences and put on a positive spirit. Be free, smile, laugh, joke, talk, just behave around him as you'd normally do around your female friends. Trust me, it won't hurt.

You seriously don't know what you are missing. Guys are fun to be with. We would treat you like you are our queen. Like you are an extension of our beating heart. We always do our best to make our ladies happy. At the end of the day, you'd even be the one complaining that we are taking to much care of you. Lol.

I'm really trying to forget it but it isn't easy,my heart is loveless.

quote author=Laveda post=41573490]So you think every guy you come across is like your dad?
Have you even called your dad ..have a daughter and dad discussion with him? ask him if he derives joy when beating mummy..you can change your daddy girl..you're the first child ....try making peace amongst them..

Change that impression..we've got lovely men out there that shouldn't stop you from finding love...[/quote]

Hi nairalanders,pls I need your advice and help.
I'm 20yrs old turning 21yrs soon,i grew up in a loveless house where my dad beat my mum everyday,I'm the first born in a family of 3.
The problem is,i don't have a boyfriend,i get admires everyday but immediatly I collect the guy's number and get home that the end of the relationship,if the guy call me I will shun him immediatly.
My fears are if I get married,my boyfriend or husband will treat me the way my mum was treated by my father,i keep to myself,dpnt go to party prefer to stay indoor and browse,its really bothering me that I can't love somebody,if my peeps are talking about their boyfriend I just look on not contributing cos I don't have.
My friends tried to hook me up with a cool guy but I don't still feel anything,valentines and Christmas,I'm always alone,its really killing me,i need help pls.
Pls you can refer me to any physiologist,i had to create a new account for this because am afraid of what you guys might say.
Thanks in advance.