Stats: 3,186,871 members, 7,931,044 topics. Date: Sunday, 25 August 2024 at 03:00 PM |
Nairaland Forum / Chimdiebere's Profile / Chimdiebere's Posts
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (of 13 pages)
![]() |
Gorimapa (a.k.a Bald Head) Gorimapa (focus on the boy on the right) Vegetable oil or pomade to shine head NOT necessary.
|
![]() |
And that is all. Oh, wait. Just in case you were wondering what a normal or accepted hair style or hair cut for a Nigerian school boy looked like, here are your choices. TYSON (pic below)
|
![]() |
6. Afro Your parents will raise the disgrace card again citing neighbors wagging tongues as their excuse. Examples of questions that might be thrown at you, include (but are not limited to): 'Do you want people to think you don't have money to barb your hair? And you had better not answer. If you answer, then I wonder where you were when your English teacher was explaining 'Rhetorical Questions' in class.
|
![]() |
5. Braided / Plaited Hair Abomination! And please don't produce pictures or stories of ancient warriors from your tribe who used to braid their hair. Wrong Answer. Only girls apparently are allowed to braid their hair. The countdown to university begins.
|
![]() |
4. Relaxed/Retouched hair You will be asked if you are a woman and might be asked other similar offensive questions. But that's beside the point. Gorimapastraight.
|
![]() |
3. 'Chook-Chook' haircuts (a.k.a Micro-coils) am not sure about the the official name for this one, hence the improvised name but the picture should help. I think they are called Micro-coils though. Your parents will probably mention the words 'criminal' and 'bus conductor' in the same sentence with that hair style and as you know that's not a good thing. They will ask you how many doctors or lawyers (Those being the only relevant professions in this life, after all) wear their hair in this manner. Warning:Do NOT ANSWER. That is a trick question. They will finish you if you do. Be a good boy and keep quiet. I hope you took pictures before they found out because that hair stylehas gotta go. Once you get to the university, you can twist, coil, dye, and do anything you want.
|
![]() |
Unless your parents are very liberal, chances are they restrict what you can do with your body under their roof. By 'under their roof,' I don't mean the house they built with their own blood and sweat. That's unnecessary, and you would be inviting trouble if you dared to challenge your father especially on why he has not built a house like your friend's father (insert name of friend here). But this is not about houses, rented or bought. It's about your hair (or lack of it). Ihad primary school and secondary school students in mind for this post because for the most part, they are still minors living with their parents at this stage. The following list covers a few hairstyles, outside of the typical Gorimapaa and Tyson,which are guaranteed to raise your parents' blood pressure. Of course, I hope you'll want to do the opposite. Here we go: #1- Dreadlocks- Dreadlocksare also called 'Irun Dada' in Yoruba. Now I don't know how you'll be growing dreadlocks under your parents roof without their knowledge, but let's assume you're able to pull it off. That is, until one day whenGhen Ghen! Your parents pull off yourbandanaand see the locks on your head. After asking you if you want to grow up to be a cultist (referring, ofcourse, to the red and black bandana on your head), a few things are likely to happen at this point. But, I will only offer one scenario.Chances are your parents will tie your arms and legs down as they yell for the driver (if they have one; if not, they'll call one of your siblings) to bring the following items so that 'this boy will not disgrace us.' Chances are that your father is the one ordering the driver about while your mother stands nearby either egging him on or repeating 'Blood of Jesus' while asking him to take it easy.The following items will appear within a few minutes: razor blade, comb, a pair of scissors, clipper and belt to flog you after the ordeal. More than likely the razor bladeand comb will do the job for the clipper, but who knows. Your parents might be considerate in spite of their rapidly rising blood pressure and use a clipper instead.I am not quite sure whether the driver or your father will barb the hair, but either wayyou'll be left withzero coverage, i.e.Gorimapa(a.k.a bald head). Which leads usto Number 2. 2. Mohawk dyed Red or Blueor similar outrageous color Even if you're patriotic and decide to dye this Mohawk green and white, it won't redeem you. According to your parents, you resemble a male fowl. This comment will swiftly be followed by another comment on your wasting school fees. Afterwards, you'll end up like your friend in#1:bald and flogged. 1 Share
|
![]() |
As a fellow geek, you may wholeheartedly agree with this article. If you are a non-geek (do they really exist?), you might take offense. Regardless… how you feel about the matter is largely irrelevant – the truth is that a geek probably will steal your girlfriend this year (or steal away the girl you may have designs on), and while we hate to be the ones to break it to you, it’s simply a friendly forewarning. Without further ado, here are 12 reasons why a geek will steal your girlfriend this year: 1. Geeks make more money than you.Claiming that women value money over everything else is not going to fly. Instead, you must consider the more practical angle – when all other things are considered equal,the guy with more money is simply the better option.That raises two questions – do geeks have more money, and how does a geek match up at everything else? For the former, here’s a thought:Remember that pimply faced, awkward, AD& ![]() 2. Geeks are smarter than you.They might not have a player’s social skills and graces but they do hold degrees in anything from literature tonuclear physics. And even those without a degree (thinkBill Gates) can converse about more then how much they earn, what kind of car they drive and the latest football scores.Stimulating conversation goes a long way towards winning her heart – and compared to the average guy, a geek has far more to talk about and is undeniably farmore interesting. 3. Geeks pay attention.Men in general cannotmultitask. That is why when you are on a date, your eyes glaze over while you stare at woman’s cleavage and all you hear isbla,bla,bla (to be fair you’re probably not missing much, but that’s not the point here).So how do geeks differ? It is not that geeksdo not appreciate breasts (they are men after all) but what’s almost universally common in geeks is the presence of old-fashioned chivalry and plain old good manners. You’d be surprised at how far that can get you with a girl (as long as you don’t roll over and play dead).Given the choice between breasts and listening to thebla blaof their new lady friend, odds are that the geek will be discreet in his stares and learn to multitask (see #2). Hey, you can’t avoid great cleavage… 4. Geeks remember what matters. I’m not talking about when the Chicago Bulls won the championship for the third time in a row or how many times Jessica Albawasin Maxim magazine. Geeks have super powers – they can remember birthdays and anniversaries and all other little nuances women love so much.In itself, having a good (nay, excellent) memory is just a regular trait (and can be annoying if you feel the overwhelming urge to correct others), but combined with #5, it is an overwhelming advantage for the geek. 5. Geeks pick out the best gifts.Not only will geeks remember when it’s herbirthday, they will remember what her likesand dislikes (and if she hasn’t told him, see #6 for the kicker). With all this information at their disposal, geeks will also come up with perfect gift. It really does take minimum effort, regardless of what men might think.And let’s face it: when was the last time you remembered your girlfriend’s birthday in time, let alone found a gift that has made her squeal with delight? 6. Geeks put in the extra effort. Missed her favorite show? Can’t find that obscure Indian movie her friends have been telling her about? Interested in a new underground band that could be the next big thing? Leave it to the geek to find it for her.And if they haven’t been together for long, you can trust the geek to ask her the right questions and find out what she wants and doesn’t want – and then give that to her.You don’t have to obey her every wish – giving her what she truly needs is often thekey to a successful relationship, and not only are geeks ahead of the curve in finding out what she needs, but they’re also ahead in terms of putting in the extra yards to ensure that she gets it. 7. Geeks are better lovers.Before you laugh…actually, go ahead, laugh this one out. I’ll wait.Once you’re done claiming your superiority, here’s the harsh truth – men are, on average, unsatisfying. Experience doesn’t do much for a guy if all he’s doing is trying to hold it in as long as possible – yea, practice makes perfect but you’re onlygoing to go so far when your limit is 3 minutes.Notice that I didn’t say geeks were better endowed or lasted longer – but that geeks were betterlovers. Compared to an average guy, a geek is going to be better prepared, knows exactly how to please a lady in bed and will actually pay attention to her needs instead of trying to catch the early train back home. 8. Geeks get the best gadgets.Lets face it: diamonds and pearls went out fashion a while back. Now it’s all about the latest gadgets – iPods and smartphones, iConnect pillows and singing yoga mats. And who has the fingeron the pulse of what is hot and what is not in the electronics world? The geek of course. Not only she will be hip and cool with her latest gadget, she’ll also be the envy of her girlfriends.And that, my non-geeks friends, holds one of the biggest secrets to a relationship – make a woman look good, and she will go through a lot of trouble (like dumping her current boyfriend) to be with you. 9. Geeks will nurture the child within.What man will not run screaming if she wants to play dress up, admire that doll in the window or suggests an outing to the latest amusement park? All these things are normal and accepted in a geek’s world. 10. Geeks are the new handymen – exceptthat they’re good at what they do.Geeks can upgrade, maintain, upload or fix anything that is plugged into a wall. You want your computer to be fast as the speed of light, want the best sound system, TiVo playing , want your tea kettle to whistle a tune while brewing your coffee? Ok that last one might be an exaggeration, but you get my drift. Anything technically related issomething geeks can doand if it is not their area of expertise, they have friends who can handle it. 11. Geeks are trustworthyTrust is a funny thing. If a guy is too loyal, he might be seen as clingy and just another burden. If the same guy plays around and can’t keep his toungue in his mouth (so to speak), it’s going to magnify a lot of other problems that a girl would usually compromise over.But if you get it right – if a girl can be secure in her relationship while retaining her freedom, she’s going to be on the moon (and that means more fun for the geek).If she fancies a night out with the girls, sheknows that her geek can be left unattended without any worries. She knows that the geek is into her for more than just the sex, and is loyal to her (ok, thats what she thinks, but you can’t fault us geeks for playing that card, can you?).Remove the source of a women’s insecurity and she becomes a much more fun person to be with – as geeks know. 12. Geeks are a refreshing and attractive change from the regular stockThey are caring. They are NOT desperate for sex. They love sports, but won’t lose sanity if their team loses. And not only do they make the effort to take her outto a nice place, they also take her to places that she’s probably never been (all that research and attention comes in handy).In short, geeks are unlike the majority of the men the girl will know in her life – in fact, they’re probably much better than the guys she knows, at least according to howshe rates guys.If that’s not an advantage, I don’t know what is.If you enjoyed this article, be sure to read this one too:The Geek’s Ultimate Guide to Picking Up Girls... Thank you. |
![]() |
**In Jehomatics voice** "Buhari, Buhari, Buhari! Your people dey suffer, e be like say them better delay so we manage the Naija and now 'Buhari, ya fada, ya kudi matana ba ka so magana(I swear walahi!) Buhari e greedy , e never dey pity, e dey chop the Naira! |
![]() |
blackpanda:Gbam!! |
![]() |
fowlyansh181:you know that |
![]() |
Mafia4life:I don't use an iPhone but the two methods are synonymous, but one thing in common- having administrative control |
![]() |
Djangocode:very true indeed |
![]() |
puresoul1:thanks |
![]() |
mods pls do justice abeg |
![]() |
[color=#000099][/color] Over the weekend a friend of mine told me that he was considering switching from an iPhone to Android. This friend asked me about some benefits of doing so. One of the pros I mentioned about Android was that you can root the phone. What's the difference between Rooting and Jailbreaking? After asking me a few questions about it, his response was "OK, yeah, but I can also jailbreak my iPhone, so no big difference there“. Lots of users, on both Android and iOS alike, actually don't know that there is a very big difference between the iOS jailbreak and Android root access. You can't actually "jailbreak" Android or "root" iOS. So this this article will explain a few of the differences between rooting Android and iOS jailbreak. Rooting your Android is not the same as jailbreaking an iPhone. Jailbreaking iOS- Let's start with the iPhone. Some iPhone users like to "jailbreak“ their device after purchasing it, as it allows you to perform things on the iPhone that you can't do when it's not jailbroken. So what is jailbreaking? Jailbreaking is the process of removing software restrictions put into place by Apple on devices that run the iOS operating system. To accomplish a jailbreak, a custom kernel is used to grant root access to the device. Once an iOS user has jailbroke his device, he is then able to download apps that aren't in the App Store, use themes, and extensions that Apple doesn't support. Users do still have access to the App Store and iTunes when a device is jailbroken, and it doesn't affect standard functionality. Some iPhone owners like to jailbreak their phones. Basically, jailbreaking allows you to usesoftware that Apple doesn't authorize. Now, while iOS users might consider jailbreaking their iPhone the same thing as Android users consider rooting their phones, there is a huge difference. In fact, you can't even compare jailbreaking to rooting. Here's why. # Android Root- Apple's operating system is not an open source system, meaning that you cannot make changes to the actual source code. Android however, is an open source operating system, and allows you to do much more than just install 3rd party apps. Android out of the box allows users to install third-party apps (also known as side loading), already allows you to install themes, and even allows you to install applications directly from your SD card or internal memory of your device. Everything that iOS users hope to accomplish with jailbreaking their device is already included as basic functionality within Android. Want more Android power? Try rooting. So what exactly does root accomplish for Android? Well, not only does it allow you to gain privileged control of your device, overcome limitations that carriers and OEM's put on devices (skins, etc), but also allows you to completely remove and replace the entire operating system of the device. This is achievable due to the fact that Android itself was built on a Linux kernel, and allows a user to access administrative permissions on their phone or tablet. So on an Android device,rooting basically gives you access to more or less the entire operating system. You can completely remove the OS and replace it with user made operating systems that contain tweaks and enhancements (known asROMS), and you can even access and adjust settings such as your processor speeds. With the help of a custom kernel, iOS devices can be jailbroken to run custom apps. With the help of a custom kernel on Android, you can overclock or underclock your actual processor speed. Pretty big difference right? Rooting a phone requires patience. Additionally, root users can access the flash memory chip on their device, which is not possible with iOS devices. Rooting an Android phone grants the user what's known as "Superuser“ permissions, which allows specific applications to have root rights. The process itself normally includes exploiting a security weakness in firmware shipped from the factory. Google in many cases will encourage rooting (shipping many devices with unlocked bootloaders to make the process very simple) while warning you that it can cause damage to the device. Apple on the other hand is dead set against jailbreaking(200%!), as they only want users using apps distributed from their App Store. Easiest explanation to Explain root vs jailbreaking. Think of it like the Matrix: jailbreaking is comparable to what Morpheus could do. He could bend the rules of the system to overcome certain restrictions, but was still bound to its rules. Rooting is what Neo could do. Not only could he bend the rules, he could completely break them (my God that was a slick analogy).So root vs jailbreaking...what's the deal? So there you are. That's a very brief and not overly technical way to describe the difference between jailbreaking and rooting. So next time you hear an iOS user saying that he can jailbreak his device the same way you root your Android device, he might actually be interested to know that there is indeed a very big difference. And one more thing before I forget - lemme drop 2 instances here- For example, we have two kids here- iOS and Android , and they have their respective parents which are Apple and Google. iOS was born into a rich but strict family(Apple), while Android was born into a family of normal people(Google). with all things being equal, its descendants( the users of both OS) start to multiply gradually and then all of a sudden, iOS starts to misbehave because it has seen what its fellow Android is doing and he knows his parents aren't going to be happy about it. so this went on to its generation which are now it's users who rebelled against their parent (Apple) , because they're too over protective and restrictive of their behavior, Their parents try to warn them if the consequences of "walking" alone, but they wouldn't listen and they threatened to "disown" them if they disobeyed( to attempt jailbreak on iPhone) , they became prodigal and "went" their way. (After jailbreak). On the other hand , Android which has been pampered from day one, suddenly walks up to his parents (Google) and tells them he wants to be in control of his own life, his parents didn't object to his decision, but they ask him if he was ready for that and he said yes. so they granted him special powers (Root) and told him to look for a way to harness that true power without any form of restrictions from anyone(the OEMS). but its guardians (OEMs) wouldn't allow that to happen so they practically "locked him down" (locking the boot loaders and kernels) , until he was old enough to decide what he would do later(gaining Root access and exploits) and if he did(Rooting an android device) , then he'll be free from their captivity (free from OEM restrictions and policies). so that's how Rooting and Jailbreaking are synonymous to each other. that's just my short story there to explain it in a much more simpler way. thanks 2 Likes 1 Share
|
![]() |
Guy, be strong ! Your story might mean something, either God wants to take you to an elevated level or he wants you to be an Employer of persons. After all, Bill Gates worked with IBM computers, then after a while, he created and designed Windows OS and showed IBM what he did, IBM thought he was dumb and foolish for doing that. Then after a while, IBM told him that his services were no longer needed, so Bill Gates left with his Windows but didn't give up his dreams ever! so when Windows started selling and many people were buying it, IBM now felt like they should bring back their own, since he worked with them before, they approached Bill Gates and asked him to come back and work for IBM, he refused! IBM said OK, instead of working for them , let them buy his OS and use for their computers, he didn't allow that! And now IBM is regretting their decision since then on why they sent Bill Gates away with all his ideas that'd have made them better. But look at today , Windows OS is the leading OS when it comes to Computers, even Apple computers were there before them , but you see the difference? you too can make it. just take this as a stepping stone to get what you're looking for in life. God bless. 2 Likes |
![]() |
pls help me find the meaning of this word - Gerrarahia mehn! ![]() |
![]() |
Add me too Abatically, there're some things I want to "discuss" , so that my Apple friends will stop disturbing me |
![]() |
abatically:seriously that guy is annoying! ![]() |
![]() |
fowlyansh181:you're a complete asshole for saying that ! as your name implies "Foul nyash" you're truly a foul nyash! shame on you! of all names in this world, even Greenhulk is better than you. and pls am talking from my side of experience which am used to Android and not your iOS or whatever thingy you use |
![]() |
abatically:probably but airshout isn't on App store anymore |
![]() |
NiGeRianTr0ll:correct! ![]() |
![]() |
MsZeezah:how do you think apps like Lucky patcher were made? uh ![]() |
![]() |
iPhone users don't really feel comfortable eating KitKat bars around their Android counterparts for the fear of mockery. That's right , deep down inside you its paining and you know that KitKat is now a Google thingy. proverb- "whatever an iPhone can do , an Android will always do better because we're like sorcerers. But whatever an Android will do and survive easily, then iPhone users should back off! don't argue this fact because it's true, but you might not know what to say |
![]() |
and one more thing I just discovered which you can't argue the fact that Android is over iOS , Is the ability to do "screen recording". What's screen recording? this is when you can make a video tutorial using your phone without any external camera and Root permission is required to do screen recording on Android , just like those videos on YouTube where you see a guy using his Android phone for a tutorial and you might be wondering how. but iPhone guys can't do screen recording , highest they'll do is to get an external camera and that's why iOS video tutorials always annoy me! You can say and argue whatever you want but its a proven fact! Hope you're hearing this wherever you are Greenhulk. and lastly Being the master of your own device is only possible on Android because Android is a very faithful servant that doesn't easily " disobey " its master, unlike iOS where by whatever Apple says and you dare go against it , then you're on your own ! Apple is 200% against jailbreak, that's why crooked app developers can't just make an app that require jailbreak to work on your iPhone because Apple will instantly reject it at once! Google warns against rooting, but its not just anyhow Root app that Google accepts on their app store due to Google's restrictions on certain policies. So you see, now tell me who doesn't love open source OS . You can argue all you want but that's just the bitter truth here am telling you iPhone users ! believe it or not! |
![]() |
MsZeezah:its simple, I'll create an app that will enslave other apps on Android and payments will be free no matter what |
![]() |
abatically:Hmmm, I see your using a Samsung Galaxy S6, just hope it isn't Mediatek |
![]() |
one more core fact that might amaze you which you just can't argue with , on Android, its very "easy" to bypass in-app billing thanks to some apps like lucky patcher and some other greater apps that I won't mention their names for security reasons. I've "cheated" a lot of app developers on Android phones and I get upgrades for free, but iPhone (upon the whole jailbreak) can't even run an interactive shell command line like Androids will do. So many app developers prefer iOS than Android in terms of profit, (but there's still piracy on iOS, but a very little bit unlike Android) but the most preferred is Windows phone! even iPhone is a learner to Windows smartphone when it comes to security! that's why Windows OS is indeed the hardest nut to crack for hackers, because I've never heard of any jailbreak on Windows OS . Microsoft doesn't give a shit to whoever that tries to "jailbreak" their Windows smartphone, they'll practically flush out that system and the phone becomes useless! unlike Apple that keep on patching jailbreak anyhow 2 Likes |
![]() |
greenhulk:I know what am saying you're not an Android user! even Those using Windows don't argue with others, they just watch! Nigga get your mind right |
![]() |
REAL FACT! Stuffs Androids can do that most iOS devices can't and will never do #App integration- on Android every time you download an app it integrates with the others and you can easily others e.g if I wanted to send something from my drop box to a guy on whatsapp no problem, it'll go, but on iOS you can't just do the same # Setting default app- on Android, if I don't like an app or a browser , I can simply set it to whatever I want e.g Uc browser as my default browser, but when I try to do the same on iOS it forces me to use Safari even when I don't want to. #HD resolution- I don't know why Apple doesn't get it, HD resolution is everywhere, your TV is HD resolution even Android phones have better HD resolution unlike iOS that brings out a "funky " odd stupid resolution . #Flashing custom ROMS- this is a feature that iOS even in the next 100 years will never be able to do(you can argue all you want ), on android if you don't like the look and feel of your phone or your OEM isn't pushing updates to the market you could simply flash in a custom ROM, but make sure you've unlocked your boot loader and you have root access. #Ability to hide and customize apps system wide- on iOS ,Apple practically install certain bloatwares, yes I call them bloatware because people don't use them and they don't allow you to uninstall them, sure you could just create a folder and toss them in but it might still be bothering you. But on Android I can hide an app I don't want anyone to see, it doesn't "exist" and I can change any app icon I want to, but on iOS and Apple "flamboyant" new look, it's either you love it or hate it! # NFC capability- Most devices even Blackberry have NFC capabilities, NFC on android can be used to transfer data and even make some kinda payments, but on iOS its not just possible. #System iptables- on Android , you need root permissions to proxify your whole system and also proxies can be used to even access payments and apps that don't respect proxies will be forced to! but on iOS you can't do the same Switchable Keyboard- Android being a very unique device has the ability to switch keyboards without root, but on iOS I'll have to Jailbreak my phone and it doesn't just work that right. # CPU overclocking- This is an Android speciality, iOS users back off! on android over clocking is everything a phone needs to perform faster, but android OEMS won't allow you to change the clock speeds of your phone , so you'll need a custom ROM and Kernel to do this, but on iOS its a mere dream! #Custom lauchers- Am sure most android users love and like the feel of their devices , but for someone like me who really likes to personalize his phone , I'll prefer to switch out the launcher, but on iOS I just can't do that . #Glory- what do I mean by glory? Android has been the powerful OS when its comes to extreme customizations and tweaks, that's why iOS and windows users are dying to reach our glory! #Ability to hide root- Some apps on android still detect if your phone is rooted and if they find out, then they won't work , but you can "hide" your Root permissions with Root cloak apk together with xposed installer! # Storage management - why doesn't Apple want to grow up for one day? on Apple phones you're stuck with whatever they offer you as storage e.g 16GB and if it's full you're on your own and you can't add external storage card, even Windows smart phones are even better than iPhones when it comes to this because on Windows, I can add external SD card of up to 256GB. on android you can either increase your internal memory (Advanced users only) or if you don't want to then just add any SD card as high as 200gb as your additional memory to suite your need. # Reputation- Android phones treat you like a grown up it doesn't restrict you from doing what you like, but it'll first if all caution you before doing so, but Apple makes it users feel like they're slaves or just zombies and they'll have to come out of that jail Apple puts them in. Malware warning- on Android, even after your phone is rooted, if a malware is released and gets into your phone, your phone will simply warn you before you install that app, but on ios once you jailbreak your phone, then you're on your own. Any malware from Cydia could easily enter your phone without you knowing it! CONCLUSION: 70% of the things we do on android without root is what iOS users have to jailbreak their phones to do! Shame on you guys! we're even better off than them. iPhone users I know deep down inside you , you're extremely annoyed at what I wrote, but its just an attribute to show you how sweet and lovable Android is and will always be! Android users , if you support me click Like , iOS users if you don't then click share! lemme see any iPhone user that will come here and yan nonsense whether thunder from hell no go fire am! 1 Like 1 Share |
![]() |
miss Cremeandchic, simple server.exe could "save" you a lot of Bandwidth on your PC, only if you know what am saying , if you stay in ABJ I could help you. thanks. if you don't my whatsapp details are +2348146073659 |
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (of 13 pages)
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 122 |