Oga Ted. I tink I've committed a dating blunder. I told my gf dat I'm unhapi in d r/ship(d feelin of unhappiness started recently sha) . I was just looking 4 a way we'll discuss abt d r/ship, Makin both our feelings known and improve it. But she started crying n left my house, tellin me I shuld go look 4 sum1 dat will make me hapi. I rili luv her though, n wuldnt wanna lose her. Abeg u get any advice 4 me?

Hello chairmen, I recently posted about hw my gf gav me her laundry 2 do. After 3 days of not calling, I leta called 2 sort issues out wit her (well I swore 2 mysef, I won't say "I'm sori") well after trying 2 straighten issues, she was still Givin me attitude, den I decided it was ova (inside my head sha) after 4 days of no communication she nw texted me tellin me hw much I dnt luv her, Dat if I did, I'll literally do anytin 4 her not 2 lose her. I Dunno hw I go carry respond. ANd by d way, "we rili ghas stop girls 4rm watching Telemundo"

jesfrosh:





first of all

Guy... you Bleep up oooooo



washing a babes clothes!!!!



well... the problem here is she's been the boss.... you've not called her for three days!!
call her


then the next time she gives you laundry... here's what you do



bring out your laundry too and exchange

or


Tell her to wash it herself... tell her you'll pay her.... but don't ooooooo

or



fucking leave the relationship and start a new one.... simple

I think I'll take ur last advice. Lemme giv relationships a break a little, after all I dey my final year. Lemme go Face my book

pcoolioz:


first off I think you are doing it wrong. I see no reason why a girl I am dating self should give me her laundry to do, is she high? lol even my mum the only woman I am allowed to do her laundry for legitly would not give me hers.

I feel if u hadn't downgraded yourself to an extent she wouldn't have the mind to give you her laundry. I have some female frnds who will not even give me a bag too heavy for them to carry cos they know I probably won't not to talk of doing her laundry.

like I said though, it was probably your presentation, and she felt she could tell you to do anything and you would.

the only time you are allowed to do your babes laundry IMO is if she sick and dying and her hands are getting shriveled. Any other reason Is No.

although I don't know how you guys relate, does she do yours as well?

D tin is Dat d gal is kinda lazy sha. 2 get dis gal 2 cook wen she's hungry na war sef.

As she started Givin me attitude, I distanced myself from her, I haven't called her for like 3 days now n she haven't called back too

RedCapChief:


Impulse80 has a point tho, you are not playing the game right. Women will usually try to assert some form of dominance over a man; that is just the way they are. It was even written in the Bible
This doesn't mean you should be a wicked guy and be claiming boss 24/7. You'll just push her away. After rejecting to do her laundry, do something nice for her on your own terms. For instance, after my father finished whupping me, he may take us out to ice-cream the next day.

I've also read something that works about conditionality game i.e you'll do something for her if she'll do something for you. If you do her work for free every time, you are nothing but her house boy.
So next time she asks, ask her what the reward will be. That way, the value of your service doesn't diminish in her eyes. You have to be the boss o!

i decided 2 space myself a little from her.

[quote author=RedCapChief post=41914229]

Impulse80 has a point tho, you are not playing the game right. Women will usually try to assert some form of dominance over a man; that is just the way they are. It was even written in the Bible
This doesn't mean you should be a wicked guy and be claiming boss 24/7. You'll just push her away. After rejecting to do her laundry, do something nice for her on your own terms. For instance, after my father finished whupping me, he may take us out to ice-cream the next day.

I've also read something that works about conditionality game i.e you'll do something for her if she'll do something for you. If you do her work for free every time, you are nothing but her house boy.
So next time she asks, ask her what the reward will be. That way, the value of your service doesn't diminish in her eyes. You have to be the boss o![/q
uote] i decided 2 giv myself space from her a little.

Impulse80:

You are joking right she gave you her laundry! nigga you ain't playing the game o

Yup, she had d balls 2 do dat(or shuld I say boobs). Anyhw sha. My days of bin a "temp nice guy" is ova.

RedCapChief:

I thought things were going well for both of you. Do have any examples in mind or maybe you dey misunderstand her. Dominance is usually not difficult to assert at this stage.

She bin gav me her Laundry 2 do, I refused to do it, den she started Givin me attitude.

Teddy, I nid ur help. Me n my gal just recently started getting intimate, so I tot I culd repay her by bin more of a "nice guy", but I tink I'm beginning to lose my respect, hw do u suggest I get it bck??

Impulse80:

So you don't know Okafor's law of congodynamics? She'll come around, she's just protecting her self-esteem.

LOL, wetin u talk na true o. She don cum around. Y dem gals d complex sef

Teddy, I Comot cap 4 u. Finally me n my chick hav bin intimate(4 d 1st tym sha). But d issue is Dat, d nxt day, she told me she's feeling embarrassed abt wat happen. . N she wuldnt lyk it 2 happen again(definitely I want it to happen again) , so hw shuld I handle d situation abeg.

xxxtedyxxx:
don't worry, just don't make d mistake again, how d package goin, sup wif her

Sorry 4 d silence Ted, n 10x 4 ur interest 4 my Mata.
We r kinda gud again, she has visited me twice nw. Although I'm giving her a little space 2 feel comfy around me again. I think is working Sha cos she texted me afta d day Dat she visited me, Dat she still loves me. Hw ur side na??

xxxtedyxxx:
u didn't bring up d matter well, girls/women r an emotional species, and u need to go emotional. U went logical, dat was y u got dat response. U r gave her a chance to think..use her brain. That's. Being logical which gives her more reasons not to kis_s u.. U should av bypassed dat. kis__sing n smoo__ching is fun no doubt, u need to make her want it not decide to do it. " Babe u look great, I love what u did with ur hair, its beautiful...ur lips tho...d lipstick and everything, am resisting d urge to kiss u right now dear" or sth like.... Direct and random like " babe wen last did we even kiss...I can't even rember, perhaps 4years ago" take tins from there.
Anoda important point is dat, before u can smooch or kis_her, she needs to be confortable with u first, she needs to be free around u. doe she's give u hugs, hold u, allow u to touch her shoulders, walk hand in hand? If she aint free she won't allow u do d obvious

10x 4 d sharp reply. But she confuses me at times, one moment she's actin all comfortable wit me, d oda she isn't. She was in her (nt comfortable mood n it kinda make me wori about my role in her life) dats wat made me 2 pop d question(can u imagine hw stupid I am).

Ted, I don die. Me n my girl don't get intimate(no kissing, no smooching) n we hav bin dating 4 a year n 2 months o. So I told her about it(i told her I dnt lyk it) , her mood just changed that day, she didn't wanna talk 2 me again, it's like 2 days nw she has nt called or texted me, same with me too. I haven't contacted her too(i d wait 4 her 2 contact me first) pls did I Bleep up in any way or is there a particular I should hav brought d topic up or shuld I let d relationship die??

temi4fash:


I doubt if youbhave been friendzoned but I think you guys would be moving towards the line of FWB..

the babe just likes you and don't blow it and don't take advantage of it.. just be cool and nice (not stupid)

Thanks mehn, you just gave me hope

20million on my mind

its back on

Guys, I need una analysis 4 dis mata. we all undastand d importance of a lady investing in a relationship. there is dis lady I've bin dating 4 a year nw, n we agreed in a "no sex relationship" (but deep down I ain't kul wit it). She does most of d investing like , calling more, texting me first, there was a time she got me a gift self, wen there wasnt really any occasion sef, but afta all dis I haven't kissed her( we do cuddle though) i hav gone 4 a kiss a couple of times, but she do back out. we do even sex chat most times. But my confusion is dis , since I haven't really kissed her, I do feel a times DAT I have been friendzoned. am I right? have i bin friendzoned?