When did I say that the Albanian culture belongs to the Arabian culture

I respect his family, sure but I do not love everything what comes from Nigeria because I am together with one.

You can insert somebody else wie sagt man so schön, dass ist absolut unter meinem Niveau.

PS I do not cook for him because of love, I cook for the children and he loves the food what I make and eat with us.
Cooking has nothing to do with love.

I am not didara 86

So now I have got some time to answer your post:

Hahaha the more i read the posts by katy86, the more i feel sorry for her boyfriend. That guy needs to run away from you as fast as he can. You're as cold as a fish. No love towards his family or anything.

First of all my boyfriend loves me because I am a very caring person who shows a lot oft love. But when you love somebody this will affect you too. When I love I am totally in love and I can lost myself. When things are happening around you, this will hurt you so much, when you really love. So you must decide one day just to close your heart and do not allow any feeling to destroy you.
The last sentences is confusioning me a lot. Tell me why should I love his family? People who I do not know? That will be crazy when I say that I love them. Nobody can love strangers and when you say you do then it is just a lie.
I mean for one and a half year I did not even know that he has sisters and brothers there. He told me that he has jst one sister in Italy and later after his trip a brother of him call here? So I ask and he told me that he has 5 sisters and 3 stepsisters/brothers! He never told me because he said he was to ashamed, because his father had a son before he met his mom and his mom also have two children from another man. If this is true I do not know, but I can not understand that somebody try to hide his family.

All my male German friends talk about women like you - women like u give white women a bad name.

All the Nigerian man who I have speak with told me about the Nigerian women who do not have any feelings and allow 5 man to sleep with them at the same time for money. I have heard that there are beating there children and only care about material things wich one of her boyfriends bring - it would be crazy when I believe this shit.
All the german women I know did so much for their Nigerian partner and this men treated them like shit. I see it everytime. This women loved so much and that was there mistake because they did not see that the partner on the other side is not in love or do not even know the meaning of love.


E

very man needs to be made to feel like a man and every woman needs to be made to feel like a woman. you don't wanna try and learn to cook his food (you really don't have to eat it),

Oh that is so crazy. Love is more than cooking girl. Where are you living?
I am cooking every day for my man but when he needs Nigerian man he is intelligent enough to cook it by himself. Its not only the women who know how to cook. Men can do it too.
And I love german food but I will never ask my man to cook it for me - thats stupid I am healthy and i have two hands to cook by myself.

you obviously hate his family (u don't consider his parents as your kids' grandparents), i'm sure he's nervous whenever he needs to come home to you. No warmth. Yet you say "family is important to you" you know ZILCH, NADA, NULL about what a family means. that guy is so lucky that you don't want to marry him. He should thank God for that, really. I'm really sorry for the kids growing up in an environment of such negativity and mum apparently has more of a say in their upbringing than dad does. They will never be proud of their african heritage. Poor angels.

Why should I hate his parents`? What reason I have to hate them?
That would be crazy. I do not know them. I do not have any feelings for them and they do not have for me. Family is very important for me and I know what family mean. Family is more then just giving each other money and Visa. I have very goog contact to all my familymembers.
And I do not have more to say than their father. Where did I write that? There is always a time when they can go to Nigeria may be when they are above 10 etc. and they can be proud of their african heritage when their father teach them to be proud of but he is not proud of his heritage and I can only show and teach them their German heritage on which they can be proud of.

You are really not cut out for interracial relationships. That in itself is not a good or a bad thing, but you really should never date anybody from a different culture. You're as stiff and inflexible as they come.

I date an Albanian man before my boyfriend. I loved his culture so much but we broke up. When the culture has something what touches me like the Arabian culture why shouldn`t I date a man from another culture?
But for now a will stay with my man together.

You do not know anything. I can only laugh while I am reading your funny posting.
Is that a forum for children or for adults?

"aty, the day u decided to play with your mans manliness and to have babies as a teenager, u should have known what's comming up to u.

i wonder your man is talking abt nigeria the way he does. perhaps hes doin it intentionally coz he doesnt want u to visit nigeria with him?

i wish u could see a future with the father of your children. . . "


I was not a teenager and you will never know what happens in future.
That is not possible.

People are changing. The man you meet today can be totally different in 20 years.

If you dont want to marry him, than break up with him already. Having him tagging along just because he is the father of your kids is a pure excuse. You should move on and find someone else whom you can be serious with. Age does not decrease over the years, it increases. By that time, are u going to marry at age 60?

If I can reach that high age, why not
May be I will never marry. I do not know. I am not so crazy about marrying. It is not important to me.
And I do not thing that our children are a poor excuse to stay together. We are responsible for them. We are taking care of them togehter. We belong together because of the children.

First of all, have u even tatsted Nigerian food? I know many European and American (many but not all) whom refuse to even taste another food which is different from their own and they claim to not like it when they havent tasted it. Are you that kinda person?

No. I like Arab and Turkey food. I like to cook it too ( I try it ) But Nigerian food
Sorry but I can not taste it. I try it but I can not make the food inside my mouth. It will come out again
The food what my boyfriend is cooking is, fish with eyes, meat with big bones, soup like glue and 2 kg pepper, NO

As a woman, you must always try to find a way to yopur bf/husband's heart and one way to it is by food.

I do not think so.

[list]
[li]
Try listening to these music and see if you like it or not

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LBSO4Qt7n-E

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beXdUKygY50&feature=related

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3mHMWO_-mM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KIHJOLeyFk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8n7hA-NDMWA

At least try and give it a listen to[/li]
[li][/li]
[/list]

I listen to the first three now.
Not my kind of music Boring.
You can hear it but it do not touch me.

U mean there are no NIgerians in Germany? Come on now. I dont believe that Nigerians are known travellers. They travel al over the earth and they love travelling. Im sure they are many Nigerians there. And one thing I know about Nigerians, when they meet their own fellow pupil they will surely greet them. Nigerians are knownt o be helpful to their own people as well its impossible not to make friends wherever they go. I know your house is private but at times dont you think its nice to have friends over and socialize? Like dont you have movie nights or dinner gatherings or just chit chat days? It would be fun!

They are a lot of Niogerians here! But the question is what kind of Nigerians?!
Most of them are drugdealers and real bitches. Should I force him to have contact with that people?
He do not want that again. The one Nigerian friend of him was so helpful that he stole his phone and sell it. That is why the contact broke up.

The only people who enter our flat are familymembers. I like that. I am not a person who need people around me everytime.



Well, than start picking up some pidgin english and also learn his tribe language. Like say if he is a Yoruba, just learn how to say like How are you to his parents in Yoruba and that will make them laugh. And if you dont understand ask them to speak slowly and that you wanna learn or you can put it on hands free and let your bf hear what they have to say and translate it for u. And than slowly you will pick up their slang in no time. Its all about effort my dear,.


My boyfriend is Edo. He himself always says that his language is not important. His children should speak englisch and thats enough to speak with his parents. All the other things arround let me think that i do not need to put effort in that issue. What I have to do with his parents?
I will never meet them and may be they are praying day and night that they son come back and live with them and bring Nigerian children to this world (i have a friend this happened to her. The parents show what they think about her).

And what made u think of that? U know, in life you can choose your friends but you cannot choose your family. I learn that no matter how I tried to neglect my own but in the end of the day my family will always be my family. Family are meant to burden you because they know that you are family but you have the choice to say Yes or No. Yes, your children is the grandchildren of your parents and his parents whether you like it or not but it doesnt mean that all African families would treat the white family that way. If you can help them without any hassle why not if you cannot than just say sorry. My bf's family assume that I can help them financially thinking that Im rich. They asked me many times. if I can help I would if I cannot help I just say sorry. Its the same case like they assume my bf is rich cause he is in a foreign country but they are foggeting he has to pay his school fees, his business running, the house, the bills, food but if he could help he would gladly help otherwise he would say Sorry. This is all not by force. Im sure your own family would also ask u for help if they can. The same story.

Oh you do not knwo my family
My parents will never take money from their children even if they are totally down. We have had that problem before

He has went back to Niaj a few times without me and to be honest with you, I dont think of anything especially not about AIDS because I trusted him. I dont even think he went there for sex or for another female. or drugs or whatever you call it None of this is in my head. I never for once even thought of it cause if I did, trust me, I wont be with him in the first place. I must trust someone to love someone.

You might think Thailand is about prostitution but FYI, Ive been to Thailand many huundred times and its a very nice country.



Whether he travelled or not, you must understand that every single individual including you yourself have to at least visit back your hometown /family once in a while. If you are in the US, I bet you yourself would want to visit Germany cause its yoru hometown.

When I am in the situation I would not take a man from the US and have children there.

Why the lack of turst about NIgeria? They are many families visiting Nigeria with their Children. Even I have one friend where she was born in the USA but her parents are Nigerian when she was three years old, her parents took her there and she is just fine. NIgeria is such a big country, Dont tell me the entire country to you is cruel and not secure? Whatever happened to Abuja and Victoria Island? Are they not decent and clean?


My dear, have faith and dont think too much negativity about Nigeria. Nigeria is a blessed country with alot of resources. You can go there and visit, not to stay there. ALot of tourists there. Nobody was harmed.

I see the country as a lost country.
May be I see everything to negative, but the whole world is lost.

naijaangel:

You do not understand me. May be its to difficult for you. Be in the situation and you will understand.

And know when a relationship has no future, you do not have to work for it.

I didnt mean u should migrate to Nigeria. I mean pay a visit to his family. Get to know his culture and understand them. And do you know by bringing your children there, they will get to learn half of what they inherited? They need to know who their other half of the family is dont you think so?

I think they have enough time for this when they are older.
They are so small now. What is when something happen there? When they get ill?
Here I go to doctor with my Insurancecard and everything will be ok and there?

I talked about this with a Tunesian mother who wanted to travel there with here baby. She had the same fears.

Nigeria is not secure. So many cruel things are happening. My boyfriend told me about this when he came back. I was just happy that he did not tell me that on phone.

He often aks me to marry him. How can I marry a man when I do not have a future with him?
I will only marry one time in my life and that have to be forever. That is not possible with him. I told him that, but he think I am joking. He still think that we will marry one day.  

I already said that I do not like Nigerian food, so how can I cook it.
When a man only love me, when I cook his food, than he is not the right man for me  

The Nigerian music , oh no   Please I did not hear good Nigerian music before. I like Aarab or Indian music, but Nigerian no, sorry. He do not have friends here, who he can invite. He have his people from work but he do not want to bring them here. Me too I do not bring friend in our house. That is private. Ane when he is sarching a slave , he should go and look for one but not with me.

I talked sometimes with his parents on phone, but only hello how are you? finish. We do not understand.
I already wirte about all this. Are his parents realyy the grandchildren from my children?
I have seen it often now, that the white children are nothing in all this families. They are there ok, you can use them later if you need something from Europe and then Bye. That is so sad. I do not want that this happen to my children. Family is so important and it hurst so much when they are just using you.
I decided not to go to Nigeria. The risk is just to high for my children.


I write about AIDS here because I do not know what he is doing there when he is in holiday.
He is  a man. Here he do not have all the chances but there the girsl smell the money (even when this it not there).
I think its a high risk to be togehter with a man who may be have sexual contact with every money and visa searching african woman. Do you understand that?

Think about it. May be your husband travel to Thailand every year. Thailand has a big problem with Aids and Prostitution. Would you not be afraid and trust your man blind?

For your information, he never traveled before we had the two babies.

I sound like a mother who have to take care of her children and I can not do this in Nigeria !

Parents are responsible for their children.

I know this woman. She had a drug problem.
People in this scene , I do not have contact with this kind of people.

You want to do like AIDS is not a big problem in Africa only because you are an African?

Ignorant!

"Katy86, u knew well that he has no future with you why did you have babis with him? Are u willing to just live your life with him just because of your two sons untill your two sons grow old than u will dump him? And has he ever told u that he dosnt like living in Germany?"

The time we know each other, I never think about future.
We start having a family when I was very young. May be I was not ready for it. May be I made a mistake.

Now I am getting older and I think a lot about my life and I saw how unhappy he was the time he came back from Nigeria last year. Nigerian food and music everywhere  

He never told me before that he is missing his home so much. He always talked bad about his country, about the people and the system there. Even the whether was not good enough for him  
But now I know what that he miss it. He also told me about building a house there and going back when he can not work again. So where is our future? There is no future. But my children need their father this is why I stay. I do not take this relationship serious anymore. He is also planning his next trip to Nigeria in 2012. I decide not to come with him because of the children. So this is how it will be. He will travel everytime and we will wait for him here?
No that is no relationship and when I think about AIDS wich is a big problem in Africa I would like to leave him immediately.  

Mrbrownja:

Thats the problem in Nigeria.
We would got with two small children and I am not crazy. I am afraid of my children.


To the food. I do not know what he cook, but oh I do not like meat. And I only saw Nigerian food with a lot of meat
The other problem is the pepper in the food. That is killing me when he is cooking it so how can I eat it  

I do not like Nigerian food and I can not eat it. Sorry.

My boyfriend know that. Its always funny for him to make his food in front of my face and see my reaction.

I would travel to Nigeria when we arranged everything for it, but I would only go to the big cities. I told him everytime that I would never go with him to all the small small cities.

Wow I give up

Even google can not translate that

I am white, blonde with blue eyes.
Some people say I  am so white, I look like I am already dead.  

Hello Mz DarkSkin,

You know, I have learned in school that race is not existing, so I can not tell you my race  

But I am from Germany and I thing most of my familymembers was german too, so I think I am a "real" German  

I think that women love more.

"PUMP YOUR BREAKS!, did i read that you can't be with a african man, YET you been with one for six years and im sure he has ran up and sideways inside of you, and u were afraid when he went to nigeria, yet u can't be with one? so why stick around for six years, tell us the real truth"




What kind of truth?

I said I do not want to be together with a African man again.

I do not know what you mean with "he has ran up, " but ok.

We are more than 6 year together and we will stay more years together, because of our children. They are still small and they need their father so much, but when we are getting older and the children are out of the house I do not see a future for us. His life is in Nigeria not in Germany. My life is here in germany and not in Nigeria. He can not be happy here forever and I can not be happy there forever and I would have this problem with every other man from another continent too this is why for my may be next relationship I only want an Eurpean.

Thats all

This thread is quite interesting 

I think this kind of relationsships often do not have a real chance, because most of the time the African part is not really in love with the white partner and loves the paper and the money from the person more than everything else.
I also think that the relationships often break because of the white man and women who only want to have an exotic sextoy on their side.

This kind of relationships can not last for a long time.

For all the people who are really in love, other problems will come to them. I know a lot oft this couples. They are living poor in Europe and can not pay all the bills every month but the phone never stop ringing because the African familiy needs some money again for handy, clothes etc.  This kind of terror can destroy a good relationship.

I am togehter with a man from Nigeria since more than 6 years now, but when  I think about future I do not see us as couple. I know that he wants to go back one day. He says he want me to come with him but hey I will never leave my country and go and live in Nigeria. Thats crazy.
The time we know each other, we never think about this, but I am getting older and I have to be honest to  myself. Last year he travel the first time to Nigeria. It was hard for me to let him go. I was really afraid of him, but this time show me, that we are not good for each other.  I cant sit at home and wait that he caome back from his travelling. I am to young for this kind life. I can still search a good partner who have the same dreams about future like me.
That is a reason why I don not want to have contact to his family. They do not need to be worried about that we can stay together forever. No. I think about traveling there with our two boys so that they know their grandparents but I  am not sure if that is a good idea. I mean ok, they are his sons, but is that family in Africa the family of my two boys?
I dont think so. I see it often how this people are treating their "white" children. It is like they are not their real children so why should I hurt them?

For me I would never want to be in a relationship with a African man. If I want to have another relationship again( man are so difficult ) I would prefer an European man.

Thanks markenny!
I will show him that and tell him that police can not help him.

I have got the mail.
Thank you very much.
I found your adress the time I read your latest Postings.

I told my boyfriend about the man now and he is not sure if this is possible.
He plan to go to police and get paper from them for the embassy.

I dont think that this will help.

Please can you tell me abot the man? What is he donig? Is he from the embassy? How can he pay the money to him?

I need some information. My boyfriend is sometimes a little bit difficult

You have my email.

Thank you markenny.

You really help us! My boyfriend is going mad because of all the stress.

I read about your problems too. I hope everything is solved.

I wish you the best.

I see that you are online.

I try to add you but I dont see where I can do that.

Please contact me because of the embassy.

kati.jasch@web.de

azorjiu - its not that easy.

May be for some people. May be for the people who study abroad an have got good jobs in Europe and America. For all the rich people its easy to get a Visacard, but my boyfriend dont have all that. His Job is bad. He dont earn much. No bank want to give him a Visacard and now its even worster because he can not do anything because is passport is expired.

The lady on phone from the embassy told him one million time that they dont accept his Mastercard. He should go and get a Visacard - search people who have one. We dont know any Nigerian here, who have this kind of card. Most of them dont even have a job and they are living from social.

He is allways very friendly to the people from the embassy, but this dont help. They are very rude. I saw it in 2005 when we travel to Berlin. I sit there with him and we was waiting. He had a termin but nobody had time for him. So we wait the whole day and when he try to ask in a very friendly way, this people there was treating him like shit.
I never see something like this before.

markenny!

Thank you very much for the advice!

If you still have the number from this man please send it to my email : kati.jasch@web.de

If have had some problems with my account yesterday, this is why I couldnt answer yesterday.

May be its not allowed to write in another language? I dont know.