crackhaus:

I had hoped she would discern this for herself without me pointing it out.

It almost seemed like i was conversing with a real-life Princess at some point.

Cc: Mizmycoli

.
I'm honoured

tommyken:

I pray I don't marry your type in this life.

There is an Egocentric and entitlement mentality written over you.

Me too.
I pray our paths never cross out there in the real world.

crackhaus:

For her own sake, you better be kidding.

Someone that is too hot and mentally sound for ALL the males on Nairaland to handle.
Get where I'm going yet?

All the males she's bantered with, yes

crackhaus:

I know you're kidding...

Absolutely not.

Mindfulness:


I have nothing to lose. From now on everything is an extra.
Take good care of yourself. Make your well-being top priority always
It's so easy to remember all the wisdom that should guide me when talking to you, as usual.

I might sneak in later. Until then ... take perfect care of yourself.

And you too, Angel



Go happier, go higher.
It only gets better from here on.

eyinjuege:


When you're faced in a high pressure situation, with a lot of hungry, probably loud customers waiting for their food and you're alone in the restaurant dishing out food and collecting money at the same time(perhaps it was even lunch break hour, usually busy) you'll be glad to see any life saver like a husband, sister/brother or friend and you'll probably shout over the noise - "PLS, HELP ME BE WASHING THOSE PLATES OVER THERE". (Unfortunately in her case, her husband was not a lifesaver but a stressor).
You probably dont have time to go and meet the person, take him/ her to one side and be explaining why it would be nice for them to help you (remember your customers are waiting and queuing up, your money box is probably still out there over the counter exposed.
I definitely expect someone who feeds from the proceeds should know better. That's just me sha. I cant see my friend struggling in her food place and won't automatically render help without being asked, how much more a spouse.

Did Crackhaus read this and still justify the slap
I've said enough.
Let me sleep

Mindfulness:


You see the result of this way of thinking.

Hun, I need to get some more pages finished. I hope I will see you around soon?

Yassss. :-"

I'm always around. Just not always writing.

Hope the project goes smoothly

And hope I'll see you around more.

Mindfulness:


You know dysfunctional families are healthier than divorced parents who co-parent without all the drama.

Only in Africa, and some parts of Asia, I suppose

crackhaus:

I'm happy for both of you, honestly..

I never thought Mindfulness capable of making any real friends on NL. She's always fighting everyone, male and female.

Does she really?
I think she's too hot and mentally sound for you guys to handle.

Well, whether she fights or not, I just love her like that biko.

Mindfulness:


Problem is that some daughters will even be told to go back and apologize. Imagine that!

They should well done.
Tomorrow, they will fill the news about how one wife stabbed their husband.

crackhaus:

You're prevaricating.
I am not trying to justify the slap.

I only put it to YOU that if YOU can justify a wife being rude to her husband because of stress, then YOU should also be able to justify the husband slapping her because he's also experiencing stress.
Everyone reacts to stress.

I put YOU in capitals this time, in case you missed them other times.

If I did not disrespect your body, why should you disrespect mine.

If I disrespected your ego and you have the need to go on a vengeful spree, disrespect my ego too.

Don't touch my body when I have not permitted you to do so. Don't disfigure it either.

Doing otherwise means you're a psychopath.

Mindfulness:


I applaud your clarity, strength and determination. This is how it should be. Self-respect first.

Yes. Even if you give me the world, you don't dare disrespect my body or disfigure it in any way. Only childbirth is permitted to do that to me.

My parents did not give my hand in marriage to you for you to turn me to slapping or punching bag.

If I hit you, it would be different.. If I gave you hot insults that really pushed you.....that one is different.. In fact, if I insult you..Insult me back. But don't hit me. I did not hit you. And if you feel my mouth is too much for you, walk out.

Mindfulness:


Like I said, their beliefs stand in their way to objective reasoning.
It is well.
Everything changes eventually and there is no regression, only progress.

A large Resounding Amen to the Progress Part.
Amen. We need it in this country.

Mindfulness:


On a rational level, he understand you are right.
On an emotional level, I smell psychopathic tendencies.

Maybe that's what it is.

If I'm that woman, let me put it pomp and plain...

I WILL deal with that man. Next time, he better learn not to disrespect my body when I didn't disrespect his.

Nonsense.
..

Mindfulness:


I feel like some of the cultural norms and religious dogmas deprived some people of any form of logical thinking and objective reasoning. It's unbelievable what responses I have read on this thread. And I would not even refer to the system using the word value because there is nothing valuable about it and it manifests itself on all levels of society in a very pathetic way.

Thoroughly co-signed.

Even if it's my child, if I beat her out of frustration, why should I justify it?

Would it kill me to accept that I was wrong? That no matter what she has done...it does not justify beating her?

How much more a grown woman?

What temerity?

How can you use negativity to deal with negativity and still be looking for a nod from the universe that you are somehow right for what you did?

crackhaus:

You're stringing... Let me take you back

You are excusing being impolite/being rude and attributing it to stress. I'm telling you to also excuse the slap and attribute it to stress-induced ego bruising, if that's the case.


I dont know if she was rude, you dont know the man's state of mind before engaging her brain either.

Again...we do not know that she was impolite or rude.

And if you think it's okay to excuse the man for slapping his woman because she told him to help out whether rudely or not...

Mehn, we should prolly end it here...

Gosh, there are things I don't want to imagine happening to me.

I did not insult you. I did not hold your shirt to your throat. In my state of feeling pressured because I'm working so hard to feed myself, feed YOU and our children, I call out to you to help me with dishes...and your response to me is a slap...for WHAT?

Again I ask, if you can't help my situation at that time, if you can't join me in sacrificing for our family...

Why not walk out?
Why slap me?

Did I insult you or pose any physical threat to you?
Is asking for your help an insult that should warrant your slapping me?

Ndi mmadu sef.

Mindfulness:


Couldn't have said it any better. A man taking his frustration out on his wife is really saddening.

I never knew that in a situation like this.. We should be justifying the slap he gave her.

That's bullying.

No one is 100% polite. Sometimes, circumstances make us appear that way....

Is that why we should be slapping one another?

I'm thankful I'm not married to a "Nigerian"

I look at our thought process and twisted value system in this country and I'm short of words...for real.

kingreign:


Those are sanitary items, it's like asking someone to dash or sell you hiw/her used kitchen sponges or even toilet brush.

It's gross
Gosh who does that?

Well, to each his own!

Don't assume.
You never know really.


And last I checked, he or she she didn't ask to be dashed..
They just want stuff at a reduced price...A reduced price. Simple!

crackhaus:

But this is not about you na, the person I asked the question hasn't answered.

Where you even jump come out from sef?

I've been around.
Very few reasons give me energy to type on NL.
She's one of them.

Mindfulness:


I have never been more at peace. God knows! A ton has been lifted from my soul and another from my heart. It's like a miracle truly. I thank God all day every day. I have never been more grateful.

I won't stay long on NL. It's just that I am working on a project/promotion so spending a lot of time on my computer. It will be over in a few weeks but you have my email and until then let's have some fun.

I can relate with being on a computer all day and NL serving as a distraction.

It's past midnight and I'm awake because my body clock is yet to adjust...or so I think

Yaaaassss to the fun part.

crackhaus:

@ Politely.. End of discussion

The next line where you're trying to justify being impolite because of stress, will just put you in another hole that i don't want to cover with sand right now.

Justifying rudeness because of stress, yet you can't justify the slap because of stress-induced ego bruising. You're too funny.

Na wa.

And you know she was rude, how?

And even if she was...

Can he keep his filthy hands to himself next time, and either help with the dishes, give a quick retort, or walk out?

Why take out his frustration on her?
Is she the reason for his failures?

I'm happy he left the house..
He should stay out as long as he likes.

bukatyne:


Happy new year ma'am

How have you been?

Same to you ma.

I've been well

Hope you have been fine too?

So good to read from all of you again, including Crackshaus.

crackhaus:

Which is why i asked if it was going to be in my very before.

Again, you're deflecting and trying to make this about you.
Do the honours and answer that her question from before, please?

Mindfulness:


It's always the same when one returns from a holiday. I know this feeling very well.

I am the happiest person on planet earth. Remember the sad story I confided in you some time ago? It's been resolved. I have never been happier. I am happier than happiest. I love everyone right now, everyone but Crack.haus.

Awww. Lovely!!
I thought as much. I am so happy for you!

Yaayyyy. Where's that dancing emoji when you need it?

I thought as much.

There's this peaceful and Serene aura I sense when I read from you lately. I felt happy to see you writing again on NL.

Yaaaaaaayyyy...again

Mindfulness:


I have always loved you so much and I love you even more now.

It's always been mutual. Always

crackhaus:

Good for my ego that two married women want to gossip me?

In what world?

Gossip you kwa?

When you are here live and direct on the thread?

I thought gossiping about a person is usually in the person's absence?

crackhaus:

Of course I'm deflecting.
The nerve, to ask me a question when she hasn't answered mine.

Tell her to answer this:
Would you "ask" your husband to do dishes right in front & to the hearing of strangers in a public place, or would you call him aside to a private corner before making the request?

Then we can continue

Ohhh, I see what this is...

An ego boosting exercise(ish).

If you want me to answer...I mean, since of course you know we (Mindy and I) tend to reason alike, I would.

You know what, scratch that...

Here's my answer.

For fvck's sake...why should that be an issue?
That my husband came into the restaurant and saw how busy it is. Anyway, I trust him. He will want to do everything for me if he can while I just rest.

But since it's not my husband we're talking about here...

Again, I ask...what is the big deal in politely asking my husband to help with dishes?

And even if for some reason, I wasn't polite enough, apparently because I'm under enough stress as it is....

Why would he slap me?

If he can't swap positions with me or walk out if he's so stressed, it's prolly best that he left the house las las.

Can't deal with nonsense bikko.

Mindfulness:




So nice to see you my lovely sis. How have you been?

I've been well. We came back from our short vacation two days ago and I suddenly don't feel like working anymore.


And you lovely, how are you?
It's been so long

kingreign:
a plunger isn't more than 1000 naira, please visit any shop where plastics and baby care kitchen utensils are sold. It's a must have for every modern kitchen and bathroom and toilets.

So please invest small cash in one and stop finding one at clearance sales thread.

.

What is small to you may not necessarily be to him or her

Good thing you advised on where he or she could buy it.

However, it is not in your place to tell what a person can or can't look out for in a thread like this.

To each his own!

crackhaus:

That you won't have to ask your husband to help you with the dishes implies that he always does it, and there has never, nor will there ever be a time when you will need to ask...because he always knows when to do the dishes.

If that's not 'idealism' hyped on steroids, I don't know what is.

She asked you a question. Kindly answer. You're deflecting.

Mindfulness:


What is idealistic about it? If I see a loved one stressed, I rush to help if I can. You don't?

*in that man's voice*

As long as it's not doing dishes, and other menial chores, sure I can help.

DabuIIIT:
How the hell you ask your hubby to wash the plates!?
Huge mark of disrespect. A man is a man,he lost his mainstay,he still a man. Leave it to him to do the dishes on his own if he wants to but if he doesn't,don't tell him to. And you still asking who is to blame shows you still looking for trouble.

The guys gat a lot in his head and washing plates not one of them.






Finally,if she hurts your feelings,just walk away,don't ever raise your hands at her.

Your comment is idiotic at best.

What is bad in helping out your wife?

You men and your nonsense egos.

To assist in a business that feeds you and your children. Even if it doesn't feed you, so what?

Why would he slap her? Is she the reason he got scammed?
Even if he feels the dishes is something he can't do, can't he simply ask that they swap positions?

Look at how that one has let his life and the respect he thinks he deserves be based on how much he brings to the house.

It's even good he left the house.

The woman would be silly to go and beg him to come back. He should stay out as long as he likes.

Nonsense and maggi.