Your responses show what the poster is talking about. How can you say you will not consider a brother with a Phantom? The truth is that you would be bemused by such a man even if you would reject a marriage advance from him. Sisters need to be real and stop forming. You can be firm, but do not present ridiculous points to try to seem perfect!

isale_gan2:

Stop interrogating the sister. State your case. lol. Where are your friends? Who are your people?

I have a lot of mutants as family and aliens as friends

What really got me into interrogative mode is this line bolded here:

zayhal:

@bold

You can't run away from here all the same. All of you guys running away from this section are making here rather dull.

@topic

I agree with your summation but I wouldn't pay attention to a guy on shorts and T-shirt o.

I think that is not exactly true!

By the way, there is no case to state as we know what you mean.

maclatunji:

Your responses show what the poster is talking about. How can you say you will not consider a brother with a Phantom. The truth is that you would be bemused by such a man even if you would reject a marriage advance from him. Sisters need to be real and stop forming. You can be firm, but do not present ridiculous points to try to seem perfect!

Again, you got me smiling. I'd be bemused if I see someone come out of a phantom?

I don't usually engage in long exchanges here so this may be my last response to you, on this topic.

I said before that you shouldn't be generalising. Now, you have used my response to judge all sisters, whereas you do not know a single thing about me. What gives you the impression that a boy coming out of a rolls royce would impress me? Do you ever stop to consider the possibility of me having something better?

I appreciate good cars and would even stop to take a good look at any that tickles my fancy, but believe it brother, if the driver of that car is dressed in shorts, I won't give him a second look, this is a personal choice. It doesn't mean I look down on the person in terms of his spirituality and it has nothing to do with 'forming'.

I'm very real. If I see someone I appreciate, I can even create an enabling environment for us to get together. But each to his/her own.

I am scratching my head thinking of a car that is any better than a Rolls Royce Phantom . However, I get your point (even if I think you are still forming ). I am starting to irritate you: breathe-in, breathe-out and let the stress go. I am here to work, work and then play. Relax! that was me playing: I do that sometimes.

Now, where is the poster? He asked a question and hasn't commented since. This is a very germane topic, I wonder why people aren't interested in giving their experience or opinion.

Interesting!
Being a Muslim sister is now getting pretty hard!, Christians generalise and Muslims too?? sometimes pple evn forget Muslim 'sisters' are humans too and can make certain mistakes. When a sister does something, every sister gets the tag.

I have found myself in many situations where pple dont interact wv m just because dey thnk, she's a sister and when they summon the courage or when they just av to, they end up saying such things as 'I never thot u could be ds(whatever that is).

On the topic, Many Muslim guys would be turned down over and over again if they dont learn to approach sisters the right way. I wouldnt know d definition of dat but i bet our different backgrounds, exposure and every other thing determine what we think is d right way to be approached, especially by someone asking u out.

SO, my suggestion to the brothers here is to av an understanding of the kind of person they'r approaching without the general tag, 'Muslim Sister' before making their moves.

1. I have heard of a particular trend amongst of our devoted sisters that really pisses me off,i learnt some of them don't like to tie the knots or date someone whose knowledge on the Holy Quran doesn't match theirs.

Have u ever wondered why many women want to marry someone older, richer, taller, better than them?? I think it is becos they want someone they can respect. Whom without any iota of doubt deserves the God-given position of being d head of the household. Even men have standards wv regards to the above.So if a lady is religious to an extent, i think she'd want someone better than her, with whom she has every chance of improving. If u thnk u deserve this kinda person, it is not too much to go ahead nd improve on ur knowledge .

2. It takes time to even get good muslim sisters,and if you're lucky to see one there's no way you'll get her to talk rather they snub or ignore you.

It takes time really! Improve on ur moves nd see if dr ar changes

3. They out rightly judge you by the way you dress,must i stop wearing jeans and T shirt because i want to date an hijab sister?.

As a matter of fact, when I see a Muslim guy, subconsciously my eyes go down to d legs. And every1 would agree wv me dat dressing does make a statement about every1. But dat doesnt mean dat i take dem as overly pious as I know from xperience dat, it is not a judge of character but I do know also dat it takes courage and some level of faith to identify wv Islam at this age.

I dont think anyone should judge others but if they cannot take u for whom u are, there's no point going after them- still, dont generalise

Why is it so hard getting good muslim sisters?,i really don't understand.Please i would like to learn more from guyz on this.

guyz should ansa ds den

deols:

Interesting!
Being a Muslim sister is now getting pretty hard!, Christians generalise and Muslims too?? sometimes pple evn forget Muslim 'sisters' are humans too and can make certain mistakes. When a sister does something, every sister gets the tag.

I have found myself in many situations where pple dont interact wv m just because dey thnk, she's a sister and when they summon the courage or when they just av to, they end up saying such things as 'I never thot u could be ds(whatever that is).

On the topic, Many Muslim guys would be turned down over and over again if they dont learn to approach sisters the right way. I wouldnt know d definition of dat but i bet our different backgrounds, exposure and every other thing determine what we think is d right way to be approached, especially by someone asking u out.

deols link=topic=711214.msg8817116#msg8817116 date=1311971023:



Have u ever wondered why many women want to marry someone older, richer, taller, better than them?? I think it is becos they want someone they can respect. Whom without any iota of doubt deserves the God-given position of being d head of the household. Even men have standards wv regards to the above.So if a lady is religious to an extent, i think she'd want someone better than her, with whom she has every chance of improving. If  u thnk u deserve this kinda person, it is not too much  to go ahead nd improve on your knowledge .
It takes time really! Improve on your moves nd see if dr ar changes

As a matter of fact, when I see a Muslim guy, subconsciously my eyes go down to d legs. And every1 would agree wv me dat dressing does make a statement about every1. But dat doesnt mean dat i take dem as overly pious as I know from xperience dat, it is not a judge of character but I do know also dat it takes courage and some level of faith to identify wv Islam at this age.

I dont think anyone should judge others but if they cannot take u for whom u are, there's no point going after them- still, dont generalise

guyz should ansa ds den

SO, my suggestion to the brothers here is to av an understanding of the kind of person they'r approaching without the general tag, 'Muslim Sister' before making their moves.

Very funny!

I respect people, by whose dressing, you can identify them as Muslim. My favourite dressing is T Shirt and Jeans(when I'm not in that black thing they call office suit). But again, I give a lot of respect to those by whose appearance you see they are Muslims.

I dont disrespect Muslims that wear jeans and T-Shirt too, especially as far as I know, there is nothing wrong with i.

As for sisters turning down brothers that are less grounded in the deen,I think the other way round is even more common. I have seen sisters that complained that 'that brother is too hard(i.e too strict in deen) for their liking'. They want someone that combines some funkiness with their Islam(my type. Lol), within bounds.

In summary, I think the OP only concluded based on what he has seen. In other environments, it is the other way round. It is like that, and will always be like that. There will be brothers of different grades, as will be sisters too. Tastes will also differ.

And why is it hard getting good muslim brothers?

hayorbaami:

And why is it hard getting good muslim brothers?

And you are Male or Female?

Female

In that case I would like you to open a new thread with this topic. I have my opinions on your question but I want a new thread to air them. Make e no be like say I dey hate some people

Muslim sisters or muslim mothers have a huge role to play. Teach your sons or daughters how to appreciate and approach muslims when they get to that stage, we cannot claim to be muslims and be alien to our own culture.

ayinba1:

Muslim sisters or muslim mothers have a huge role to play. Teach your sons or daughters how to appreciate and approach muslims when they get to that stage, we cannot claim to be muslims and be alien to our own culture.

You have something there but errrrrmmmmm it is not uncommon for children to be more religiously conscious than their parents particularly in the Southwest. Hence, there is a huge gap in wooing and wooing handling skills for both young Muslim men and women. Personally, I think this issue is a big deal but people don't want to talk about it openly and deal with it!

maclatunji:

You have something there but errrrrmmmmm it is not uncommon for children to be more religiously conscious than their parents particularly in the Southwest. Hence, there is a huge gap in wooing and wooing handling skills for both young Muslim men and women. Personally, I think this issue is a big deal but people don't want to talk about it openly and deal with it!

i also c d need for muslims to talk about these things, its annoying ow we shy away from matters dat affect us. i'd like family life et al included in such discourse

^^^Nice to know that somebody sees things from me perspective.

i dont mind startn a thread on dat note, hopefully ppl'll participate

What will the title be?

muslim singles, lets have a talk

Go for it!