Well I don't know.

What do you think?

Klass99:


Dem use marriage swear for us in Africa?

What exactly is there to salvage?

I took an Uber ride last week Saturday and while I was in the car, the radio was tuned to a station with an interesting topic on marriage/domestic violence.

The guest speaker narrated how a woman came to him to say, you were right all along. She had been praying and fasting for years that her husband would change or God would change her husband and it never happened for the 20+ years she was married to him.

I think the lady is 50 years old now and she decided she was done. She wanted out and wanted to just do something as service to humanity and God.

I think 99.3 was the radio station. I asked the Uber driver if he knew the title of the program or the guest speaker's name but he said no. He told me the program runs every Saturday though on that station. I had reached my destination and couldn't continue listening but what I heard alone made an impact on me.

So, let redirect your question to you. Is the marriage worth salvaging?

Klass99:


Dem use marriage swear for us in Africa?

What exactly is there to salvage?

I took an Uber ride last week Saturday and while I was in the car, the radio was tuned to a station with an interesting topic on marriage/domestic violence.

The guest speaker narrated how a woman came to him to say, you were right all along. She had been praying and fasting for years that her husband would change or God would change her husband and it never happened for the 20+ years she was married to him.

I think the lady is 50 years old now and she decided she was done. She wanted out and wanted to just do something as service to humanity and God.

I think 99.3 was the radio station. I asked the Uber driver if he knew the title of the program or the guest speaker's name but he said no. He told me the program runs every Saturday though on that station. I had reached my destination and couldn't continue listening but what I heard alone made an impact on me.

So, let redirect your question to you. Is the marriage worth salvaging?

Not just women, even the so called men sees marriage as a yardstick to success

They have this mentality of if you don't get married you are half dead

She lied to you about getting admission to study medicine but gave it up for this guy. Does it mean she didnt have parents to guide her? How old was she when she got the admission, into relationship or even married? If she finished school at 18yrs(worst age scenario), you mean she refused to go to school but was following this dude who already showed great inferiority before marriage, right? We honestly attract who we are OP, aunty has always been sillyyyy.

To now make matters worse, she birthed 3 children inside this economy while earning 33k. Chai! To even now finish the matter, shes struggling to keep the marriage intact despite oga's words and acts of end. It is well, it is really well.

I will advice her to carry her cross..

FortifiedCity:
You mean she can start her medical degree at 33?

Yes, she can.
I know a nurse who started at 40. She was in medical school with her first son who is now a medical Dr. She is 45 now. Started practicing not long ago.

If it's her desire, until she gets that, she won't be fulfilled.
Knowing the reason why she stopped will keep on reminding her that she is a failure.

sisisioge:


She lied to you about getting admission to study medicine but gave it up for this guy. Does it mean she didnt have parents to guide her? How old was she when she got the admission, into relationship or even married? If she finished school at 18yrs(worst age scenario), you mean she refused to go to school but was following this dude who already showed great inferiority before marriage, right? We honestly attract who we are OP, aunty has always been sillyyyy.

To now make matters worse, she birthed 3 children inside this economy while earning 33k. Chai! To even now finish the matter, shes struggling to keep the marriage intact despite oga's words and acts of end. It is well, it is really well.

She didn't lie about the admission; someone showed me the letter.

For her parents, I said the exact same thing, "is it that there was no one to advise her?" But I learnt one was dead and the second was much in her life.

But there where does she go from here?

FortifiedCity:
She didn't lie about the admission; someone showed me the letter.

For her parents, I said the exact same thing, "is it that there was no one to advise her?" But I learnt one was dead and the second was much in her life.

But there where does she go from here?

There is nothing to salvage in that marriage. She better go start her life afresh...3 kids on 30k salary! Chai.

She could learn a skill though....something fast moving for daily income. It is well.

I blame poverty and neglect... If she had sponsors willing to foot her educational bill, she wouldn't have made the decision she made. Right now, the deed is done, she should find a way to make something of her life

FortifiedCity:
This is a true story!!

I have a female acquaintance who got an admission to study Medicine in the prestigious University of Nigeria Nsukka but forfeited it because she overheard her man telling someone that he would never marry a graduate because of the too many sex that students have in school.

Apparently, the guy felt any lady who passes through school always graduated with too many body counts.

This lady went ahead to forfeit that admission because she felt she loved this guy so much and would do anything to keep him.

Well, the guy went on to marry her traditionally, and at present they have 3 kids.

But that's not all, for over 2 Years, this guy has not had any sexual contact with his wife. Not only that, he has gone ahead to have 2 kids outside his marriage, and by 2 different women. Now the women are insisting he must marry them. He is not even hiding it from her or anyone.

The worst part of it is that this lady can't control her husband; the man has told her clearly that he is no longer interested in marrying her again. But for the intervention of her in laws, she would have been pushed out of the marriage.

The lady does a meager 30k job to keep her family going.

I think it was insane for this lady to forfeit her admission for anyone, but then, was it worth it?

She is 33 years old now. What would you advise her if you happen to come across her?

Lalasticlala

She should just accept her fate

Money is her major stumbling block right now. If she sees someone to sponsor her she can still achieve many things. Age is just a number. I pray God brings her an helper.

Even if she try hustle on her own with no special skill or degree, responsibilities no go gree her save. Three kids, school fees, health, food, rent etc , it's not easy in this economy o!

I would advise she repackages herself and focus on her children rather than trying to salvage a 'worldwide marriage'. Who knows she might meet her helper, afterall, he has failed to fulfil his own part of the contract called marriage. It will be well with her.

May she keep her options open and flexible!