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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Love Life Dilemma (1298 Views)
Tough Love? Life Should Be Easier... / My Love Life / My Uncle Is In A State Of Dilemma. (2) (3) (4)
My Love Life Dilemma by Bubblyj(f): 6:12pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
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Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Bubblyj(f): 6:27pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
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Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Nobody: 6:51pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
Ok |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by GboyegaD(m): 6:52pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
You both need some growing up to do. I understand his point however, there's a place of communication. Should you guys ever get back, that is something you need reach a conclusion on. On your part, stop acting as though you are doing him a favor dating him. You need learn to put your anger in check seeing that he doesn't have the level of energy you possess particularly, for troubles and anger. |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Bubblyj(f): 6:58pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
GboyegaD: Thanks for the advice. I probably left out the part where we both helped each other in numerous ways. I was trying to be as brief as possible. I’m not in any way acting like I’m doing him a favor by dating him. |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by bukatyne(f): 7:03pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
Bubblyj: @bold: Your issues in summary. If you want to be with X, you need to learn how to make things slide. Not everyone wants a fighter or someone who sees 'slight' at every turn: it is actually a mark of low self esteem. You also need to work on your anger. @X, he needs to learn to be more expressive to rid himself of passive aggressiveness and rigidity. |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by lacruz12(m): 7:29pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
I feel he's just been reasonable with himself X gave you a second chance to be sure if he could withstand your extremities and he got his answers correctly Perhaps you should be more specific with the altercations you had with those people, how were your utterances and attitudes.... By that we can tell why he would walk off without considering a truce. 1 Like |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Biglittlelois(f): 7:40pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
This is how I understand your plight, It's either you're a graduate and he is obviously not, and for him to break up with you twice when he saw the way you insulted the conductors, means he thinks you can belittle him anytime you both have issues when married because he is not a graduate and not in your level, If my assumption above is true, kindly let go, he would continue to have that insecurity and would expect you not to react when having issues with him, which is not possible, so go for someone in your level to avoid "had I know" or regrets, And you too, work on your temperament, you should learn to overlook things and stop reacting to every little provocation. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Nobody: 7:41pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
The way you cursed at the cab driver or whatever you said was probably too much for him to have quietly ended things then. And, you didn't mention but I reckon something else happened at the market he invited you to, for him to change his mind afterwards. He probably still loves you but finds your anger/reaction to situations offputting. For now, give him some space and go "no contact". He will contact you at some point and when he does, be calm, don't [over]react to things; let him see you've turned a new leaf and he should be more keen on rekindling the r/ship. But, if he still doesn't want to get back together, move on and do better with the next guy. As for the loan, asking him to repay it in one month out of anger isn't the way to go, especially if you know he can't. You've already agreed to him paying it monthly and since he's doing that, he's trying, so allow him to do that until it's paid off. |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Biglittlelois(f): 7:47pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
aroundtheearth: @bolded, Naaa I dont so, I think he used that "let's work out our issues" to lure her to assist in following him to the market, as per she be woman and a good bargainer, how convenient that immediately after, he said "he really doesnt think it can work", very cunning of him, I'm surprised she didn't get the drift. 1 Like |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Richy4(m): 8:30pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
OP sorry you were feeling bad but you see, Relationship is something that goes with tolerance and endurance..... He has weighed it and feels that he cannot tolerate your anger issues.... Try and control your anger and outburst...He might not have the energy to separate fight in the market between you and someone whom you might think was wrong and you were right someday... he doesn't have the energy to separate fight between you and a neighbor when married. He has seen all these dear and thinks he can't cope... This is because in future, you might start insulting him for not sticking out for you...You got a red flag, he saw it on you and you were waving the flag too much for his liking Please let him be.... I believe he can also like you and can go for an extra mile for u too as a friend... but u see, U are not compatible... please respect his wishes.. I believe someone will come soon for you.. who will like your no nonsense behavior which is good sometimes and worship the very ground you walked on... but let that guy be... he's just too honest in terms of his feelings... You guys were better off as friends only 3 Likes |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Nobody: 8:54pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
Biglittlelois:I haven't seen a Nigerian market in ages, so I'm somewhat unaware of how things are, but what you said could be the case. I do think she should move on 'cos he has said it's not working (twice now?) and they've been getting back together only to break up. An off and on relationship won't work unless the issues between them are completely resolved. She has said they're best friends and they may be better off that way, though I think she will always have feelings for him, thus totally moving on is the way to go (if she's able to let him go). |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Bubblyj(f): 9:08pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
I appreciate the comments, it has really helped me see things in a different perspective. I’ll do better at managing my emotions. |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Mariangeles(f): 9:24pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
Richy4: You're most times fair and mature with your comments. You see things from aerial point of view. I admire that. 1 Like |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by Richy4(m): 9:35pm On Apr 27, 2021 |
Mariangeles: Thank you |
Re: My Love Life Dilemma by GuyInTheMirror: 12:57am On Apr 28, 2021 |
Bubblyj:I also dropped a babe before for this kind of behaviour. Exactly yelling at the driver. This babe actually came from abroad and we were on our way to see her parents and mine. I do not regret that decison, when a lady screams at the conductor when you are not married. If you are married she will lock you out of the house. Do not make excuse for your bad behaviour, take responsibility. No man wants a loose canon as a wife. The fact you also gave him an ultimatum to pay the loan shows the kind of person you really are, if you can do that to someone you are begging to marry you. You will do worse when you are married and I am sure the guy is intelligent and he can see your real character. You are probably too spontaneous and need to learn to overcome that weakness Goodluck poster. |
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Childhood Sexual Abuse By A Family Member. / Am I Wrong / Advice For This Young Girl Please
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