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Marriage Problem - Family - Nairaland

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How Do We Solve This Big Societal Marriage Problem? (2) (3) (4)

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Marriage Problem by Rabble(m): 10:16am On Jun 13, 2021
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid,the problem i have is that, the girl family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eye to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when i noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money, although my wife is very nice she earn salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money, before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys is number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.
Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way,
before our marriage we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us , the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have a be able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do
Re: Marriage Problem by wunmi590(m): 10:39am On Jun 13, 2021
shocked

I feel your pain bro, not really easy most especially during this hard economy, when alot of families are trying to cut their suits according to their sizes and save up for raining days...

This is what you will do:

1. Ring it to your wife's ear that, the visiting of her family is too much and it should be reduced to may be once a month, even one in 2 month self.

2. If she can be giving them 10k every month so that they can stay in their house and not come and disturb you.

3. I know women love their families alot, tell her to go their once in a while to play with them, so that they won't be a disturbance to you..

4. You can also move far away from them, if you guys are close to each other.

My own inlaws don't even like coming, nah beg I dey always beg to come and visit us, I will tell them this month, nah next 3 month den go tell you them go come, they are both retired ooo, but they don't like disturbing their children....

1 Like

Re: Marriage Problem by donbachi(m): 10:55am On Jun 13, 2021
Giving and sharing is a Ministry...stop acting childish.

The day u start giving Without complains,u will start to reap the joy of it.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Marriage Problem by Amanee(f): 1:55pm On Jun 13, 2021
All I see here is lack of money, if you have money all these complaint of who finished the carton of indomie will not matter

1 Like

Re: Marriage Problem by NoToPile: 2:06pm On Jun 13, 2021
Rabble:

my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents [/b]gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy

[b]her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival



The issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have a be able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do


Its improper for you to address your in law with the bolded, you knew they are poor, you knew they have 9 children you married their child, you are now insulting your in-laws with poverty? Nawa. You are insulting your father in law because he's a pensioner ?


If you don't want your wife's siblings to eat in the house since according you you they come, eat and go and you feel cheated by this tell your wife not to feed her younger ones when they come around let's see how that will work out.

3 Likes

Re: Marriage Problem by takimsipho(m): 2:13pm On Jun 13, 2021
Amanee:
All I see here is lack of money, if you have money all these complaint of who finished the carton of indomie will not matter
Shey you be female, I don't blame you. You have no idea how difficult it is to feed plenty mouths who just consume without regards. He married one not the whole children in that family. That's how you like men to be stressed unnecessarily to please you people, until his BP begin to rise.

2 Likes

Re: Marriage Problem by ayomilore: 2:17pm On Jun 13, 2021
Guy. Pray to God for more blessings.
Have a serious conversation with your madam on the issue.
If there is anyone you can empower among them so that they will be financially independent please do so.

God bless you.
Re: Marriage Problem by Amanee(f): 2:22pm On Jun 13, 2021
takimsipho:

Shey you be female, I don't blame you. You have no idea how difficult it is to feed plenty mouths who just consume without regards. He married one not the whole children in that family. That's how you like men to be stressed unnecessarily to please you people, until his BP begin to rise.

Go and make money bro
Re: Marriage Problem by lilyheaven: 2:25pm On Jun 13, 2021
Amanee:
All I see here is lack of money, if you have money all these complaint of who finished the carton of indomie will not matter
Yess ooo!
It’s because he doesn’t have enough that’s why he is complaining.
Do you have suggestions for him?
Re: Marriage Problem by lilyheaven: 2:39pm On Jun 13, 2021
Y

1 Like

Re: Marriage Problem by takimsipho(m): 3:00pm On Jun 13, 2021
Amanee:


Go and make money bro
I hear you, shey na you dey pay my school fees for my MSc program. Shey na you dey tell my boss at work not to pay me my salary. Go and make money, go and make money, how much are you talking about here. 200k na money, 5 mil na money, 2 billion na still money. You bunch of lazy girls believe a man owes you the whole world just because you have a vagina or because e marry you. Then you want to transfer your all your family burdens on him, this one of the reason why white girls are taking black men away. They don't feel cos you marry them and so must inherit their family's financial problems. Tomorrow you claim no man can tell me what to do, not when he is doing what your father should do. He owns you

1 Like

Re: Marriage Problem by EvilNeedle(m): 3:12pm On Jun 13, 2021
Amanee:
All I see here is lack of money, if you have money all these complaint of who finished the carton of indomie will not matter

Gbam.
Re: Marriage Problem by EvilNeedle(m): 3:14pm On Jun 13, 2021
lilyheaven:
The day you married her, was the day you became part of her family.
The only problem I have with most people around us in Africa is that they eat a lot.
One person will want to finish 3 cups of garri alone.
Meanwhile, most people from abroad, hardly finish half cup of garri.

I was surprised, when my youngest brother that will sit down and consume 4 cups of garri and will be looking for more things to eat, couldn’t finish a cup of garri, when he came back from UK.

I was shocked ooo, my husband uncle and his wife that came back, same thing.
They will be eating everything in small quantity, I really enjoyed serving them.
But those from the village.... they will use big plates for tea, the whole bread must finish, yet they have not eaten, because tea is not food.
.................

Just provide the one you can, you cannot come and kill your self

Very true. It is the mentality. After you've gone abroad and seen plenty to eat, food is no longer your problem. In Nigeria, food is still your problem so you want to eat it in excess.
Re: Marriage Problem by EvilNeedle(m): 3:18pm On Jun 13, 2021
Rabble:
No need for a long story, I got married 2 yrs ago, during our friendship I mean courtship it was very sweet and lovely, we got married 2 yrs ago and I have 1 kid,the problem i have is that, the girl family come to greet almost every time and when they come they eat like elephant, anything eatable they eat it, they don't use eye to see bread tea or butter in my room, they will finish it within a day, I will end up spending a lot during the time, when i noticed that it becomes offen i started telling my wife that I am broke, I don't have money, although my wife is very nice she earn salary of 40k a month, and do funds and cook many times with her money, before now I was it okay, we are like a family, now i just realized that it making me not think straight within a week oil and cooking things we bought will just finished the cartoon of indomitable that last the 2 of us before 1 month or month plus will just finish within 4 days of thier stay, some time 3 of her family will come once and another set will come again, my wife is the first daughter, the poor parents gave birth to 9 kids all in the name of looking for a boy, so she said although the 2 boys is number 7 and 9 position, her parents should be around man 60s and the woman 45yrs old. so now I am tired of the marriage, I don't know how to talk to my wife about it, that I don't like how thier family do come offend since we got married, my families has never come to sleep over in my place for a night talkless of spending holiday in my place my parents gave birth to only 3 of us 2 boys 1 girl.
Now i am just tired I can't be responsible for someone else burden why give birth to many kids and unable to train them, i plan to have only 2 or 3 kids only, and her family want to make me be like thier father sitting at home doing nothing depending on pension for survival, i have realized that I can't achieve what i should have achieved if i continue life this way,
before our marriage we agreed no family members is coming to stay with us , the issue now is they don't stay but come to eat and go, it a big cheating to me I am tired for real, even if I say I don't have money and she use her own. The money should have be able to do other important thing . She spending is also affecting me a lot, we should have a be able to buy land or car or live well, not feeding battalion. I am tired please I need advice on what to do

Bro, you are a part of that family now. There is nothing like her family or your family. Everyone is now both of your family. If you can afford to fed them, then keep feeding them. If you can't afford it, then discuss it with your wife. Don't come here and be insulting your new family because they are poor. You are also a poor man because if you had money, you won't be writing this nonsense here. Talking about indomie and shyt. angry
Re: Marriage Problem by Amanee(f): 8:01pm On Jun 14, 2021
takimsipho:

I hear you, shey na you dey pay my school fees for my MSc program. Shey na you dey tell my boss at work not to pay me my salary. Go and make money, go and make money, how much are you talking about here. 200k na money, 5 mil na money, 2 billion na still money. You bunch of lazy girls believe a man owes you the whole world just because you have a vagina or because e marry you. Then you want to transfer your all your family burdens on him, this one of the reason why white girls are taking black men away. They don't feel cos you marry them and so must inherit their family's financial problems. Tomorrow you claim no man can tell me what to do, not when he is doing what your father should do. He owns you


Unnecessary epistle, I said what I said, you can go to hell for all I care
Re: Marriage Problem by takimsipho(m): 11:13pm On Jun 14, 2021
Amanee:



Unnecessary epistle, I said what I said, you can go to hell for all I care
You will never be able to say that to my face if we met one on one. It's online so you could just type it. Enjoy
Re: Marriage Problem by Amanee(f): 8:02am On Jun 15, 2021
takimsipho:

You will never be able to say that to my face if we met one on one. It's online so you could just type it. Enjoy

On the internet, everyone is a giant. Enjoy your cruise lol

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