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Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Help! I'm Feeling Guilty Of Ruining Someone's Marriage / Namibian Man Creates Baby Saver Box For Unplanned Pregnancy And Unwanted Babies / Some People Are Insensitive - Pregnancy Is Hard (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Unrated900(m): 10:39pm On Jul 24, 2021
The Thief cometh to steal kill and destroyed
Your part has been destroyed through your lustful mind.
I think it’s your cross carry it any which way.
I was lonely for 5 years when I was In your position then
My rod kept getting stronger every night.
Different women comes by then.
I knew I have a calling
I do not wana jeopardized it
I maintain my stand.
I follow the part that says
Ye though I walk through the valley of shadow of death I fear no evil.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Openpeace: 10:39pm On Jul 24, 2021
Hezzyluv:
This story long sha. You're really in a tight situation I advise u go and see them face to face before she puts to bed. If they see u , they may not overreact. Talking to someone on fone is really different from seeing the person.
If they still insist, go and get your professional certificate and skills first and make sure you keep calling her even if she insult you, u will have to bear it b bcoz, "na u cause this wahala for you self" And it appears u lack self control, try and deal with that. Anytime your pen!s stand @tension, just go bathroom deep am inside cold water e go relax by force. And that may save you from trouble!


Please just follow this advice,


Try to go and visit her even if no marriage yet,

Then go get your skills together and finish it after that life goes on.

When you're made if you're Dangote tomorrow they can not deny you your child.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Nobody: 10:39pm On Jul 24, 2021
Priceless007:
Hello Nairalanders,

It's a long story, but I'll try to keep it short and to the vital points. Please endure the length.

There's a girl i met at a theological college in where I was studying to become a clergyman and also learning a skill under the civil engineering department of the college. She was my junior in the course, as I was a year away from graduating from my first course, while she was just a fresher. She was always having issues getting through her courses and projects and would always ask for my assistance since I was the course rep in that department. It was forbidden to have any intimate relationship with your course mate or anyone in the college for that matter, the penalty would be expulsion. But unfortunately for me, out of sheer lust and seduction on her part, and gross indiscipline and lack of self control on my part, I got intimate with her and we ended up committing fornication during one of our semester vacations. And it just happened once, of which out of deep regret and remorse I confessed the matter to the college Admin when the next semester resumed. We were panelled, after which I was suspended, while she was expelled.

During this time I was learning a skill sponsored by the college, of which I use to get paid some weekly stipend. After I was suspended I was also stopped from continuing my apprenticeship, because I was not to associate with any of the students or lecturers in the school while my suspension lasted. So I was without a job and without a source of income since I wasn't yet mastered on the skill. The condition that was given to me to resume my studies and apprenticeship was that I should go and get married before I could come back to college, so as not to be tempted to repeat my error. But I wasn't ready for marriage whether financially or any other wise for that matter. So while I was contemplating my next move, this girl came to me that she was pregnant, that she needed us to go and see her parents. I told her I had no money neither was I ready to father a child at this point in my life. I pleaded she should give me time to think about what next to do. Two weeks passed, and I called her to enquire about her welfare but her number wasn't reachable, I decided to go to her place, but I was told she had travelled a week ago to go see her family. A week later, I received a call from a woman telling me she was the girl's mother, that her daughter came home with a pregnancy, and she asked me if I was responsible for the pregnancy, I answered her in the affirmative. She then asked when I was coming to see her family. I told her I wasn't sure about coming to see them that I needed to speak to the girl first. She said okay, then later that day the girl called me, and I told her to come back for us to talk deliberate on the way forward. When she came she told me her parents (who are by the way divorced) will not accept her nor the pregnancy without me coming to see them for marriage arrangements.

I explained to her I wasn't ready for any such thing, that I have a calling to answer and a course to finish, that what happened between us was just a stupid and careless mistake that has been as a setback for me to achieve my goal, and that I was ready to overcome the trials and get back on track, and I explained to her that before then I had neither dated nor been intimate with anyone for over seven years, and so any kind of relationship or marriage was not even in my nearest future plans, and besides, I didn't even have a job, not to mention having enough money to embark on a marriage plan. She said she would never accept such excuse, that I should look for whatever means to make sure I come see her parents before her pregnancy becomes obvious. She also said that she needed money to move her belongings back to Imo state where her family resides. I agreed to raise some money for her. I went to do some menial jobs and raised some money, about ₦20k, which I gave to her and she traveled back to Owerri. From then on her parents kept calling and pressuring me to come and see them for marriage arrangements. I told them I was going to come, but just to introduce myself to them as the person responsible for their daughter's pregnancy not for any marriage arrangements. But they disagreed, that if I wasn't ready to come for marriage that I shouldn't bother coming. I pleaded with them to give me enough time to look for money to come and see them, but they instead started threatening me with court cases and arrests, at one time they brought the girl and some soldiers to my family house and harassed my family members including my mother.

So I later traveled to Benin city to go look for money. After one week of my arrival in Benin, I lost my phone and I couldn't retrieve my number. I lost connection with them until I got back to Uyo where I got her phone number from a friend of hers. At this time, I was told that they came to my house several times with police officers claiming I raped their daughter and impregnated her then absconded. At this, I established contact with the girl again and she told me that I should not bother her that she wasn't in the mood to talk to me, I kept calling her but she often ended up abusing me or we often times ended up in quarrels, so I left her alone for sometime.

Two weeks ago I related the matter to one of my distant uncles, who advised me to gather some money and go see her, I called her and told her I wanted to come and see her before she puts to bed, which is expected to be sometime next month (August). But she told me that she still stands by what her parents had said, if it's not for the marriage issue that I should not come, that I should rather send her the money I would use in coming so she can use it to buy the baby clothing and buy some hospital requirements before she puts to bed. I called her parents and they told me the same thing, and said if I don't come for the marriage agreement before she puts to bed, that after she's delivered of the baby I should forget ever coming, and should never mention that I have a child anywhere not to mention coming to claim it ever in the future. And that I should just forget about her and the child.

The issue now is this, I am a bit frustrated because I seem to have lost everything at the moment because of this issue; my calling, the skill I was learning is gone, I have no job aside the menial jobs I do at construction sites which isn't available regularly. Now the little I have saved so far, I am contemplating on whether to use the money to pay for my skills training and continue with it and start my life afresh and forget about her, the child, and her parents, or use the money to support her in her hospital requirements for her delivery. Because I don't want to be seen as abandoning her when she is in this condition, and I also don't want to give up on the child, though I'm not capable of taking care of the girl and the baby right now, and probably, I might end up getting married but not under my present circumstances. I know I've made a grave mistake and this is the consequences for not being true to myself and my calling, and I deeply regret it, and I've suffered for it in any way I can possibly imagine, but I also need to put my life back in order, because right now I'm so devastated that I'm contemplating terrible alternatives to survive the storm, I'm at a very critical moment of my life and I just feel like giving up on life altogether. Please I need your help and advice on this issue. Thanks.

PS. Please if anyone is willing to teach me any skill, I would be very grateful and willing to learn.
we can talk privately there's solution to every challenges, God is the way
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by UDUJ(m): 10:39pm On Jul 24, 2021
Why is it so difficult for some of you randy dudes to use condoms? I just can't understand it.

Do you get so excited and just forget about the risks involved for few minutes of pleasure?

Now see the outcome. Please carry your cross.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by aimalohi: 10:39pm On Jul 24, 2021
Hv u seen that girl with a big tummy? R u sure she is truly pregnant or even pregnant for u. That girl is just looking for husband. Baby is not a criteria for marrying a girl u do not really know. Be wise! Its not a must that u must marry her simply because she is pregnant for u.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by BadEnglish(m): 10:40pm On Jul 24, 2021
CharisEleos:
Hm see how devil just used 5mins madness to destroy your peace and career...
Like why can't you people just be like Joseph in terms of self discipline...

Even the girl. Your parents sent you to school and the very first year, you're already sleeping with a man. Without protection for that matter..

If she's someone that has sense, should sex be the first thing she should go and be pursuing immediately she got to school or her career? SMH..

You see, that time you were about to engage in the act was when you should have done what youre doing here now. That is, reason and ask yourself some of the questions you're now posing to us. It is then you should have reasoned you didn't have a job yet and not ready to father a child or get married.

The bible that says flee every appearance of evil is correct after all.

You better go and see the family because the didn't force their daughter on you in the first place. So, now you don buy market, go and carry your goods.

Everytime Sex sex sex.. sex that doesn't give you a happy ending, is that one sex?

When I tell people I've been celibate for many years, they think it's because I'm trying to form super girl. It's because of all these nonsense super story that you men come up with once there's any little mistake plus the fact that my body is the temple of Holy Spirit and not for any coconut head man who's just looking for anywhere to ease himself.
Mtcheeeeewwwwwww.

Even me I don't really like sex. but seeing that you've been celibate for years n my humble sef has been celibate for days now undecided are you thinking what I'm thinking? I mean can we nack? tongue
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by 12345baba(m): 10:40pm On Jul 24, 2021
I didn't read this story o buh if u no want the baby give me I want
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by stayclearofme: 10:41pm On Jul 24, 2021
Kingpin1000:
When you were bending her, did you call us?
When she was screaming harder harder did you tell us?
When you decided to go unprotected and release your condense milk inside her honey pot, were you expecting a car or plama TV as the end the end product?
Oga this your shalaye too long, carry your alone cross to your golgotha.
Kai some people on NL can be stupid sha!
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by BRATISLAVA: 10:41pm On Jul 24, 2021
AfroBeatDiary:
Go and see them before she put to bed, don't wear your best cloth nor your best shoe, go with a friend who should rather dress better than you are. Apologize for not coming earlier, give excuses for this, apologize for the incident , tell them you don't plan it this way either.

Don't go empty handed, atleast go with fruit.

Let your outlook do the talking that you're not ready for marriage.

He wouldn't only be a fake pastor fornicator, like all of them secretly are, but also an unrepentant liar...if he follows this advice.

He knows how to have illicit sex with a Halo, he should know how to deal with the consequences.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Sibtygarr: 10:42pm On Jul 24, 2021
Sleyk:
You didn't keep to your promise...
this story is LONG and not short.
Savage
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Finalfantasy: 10:42pm On Jul 24, 2021
I can teach you mobile app development.
loladeking@hotmail.com

Priceless007:
Hello Nairalanders,

It's a long story, but I'll try to keep it short and to the vital points. Please endure the length.

There's a girl i met at a theological college in where I was studying to become a clergyman and also learning a skill under the civil engineering department of the college. She was my junior in the course, as I was a year away from graduating from my first course, while she was just a fresher. She was always having issues getting through her courses and projects and would always ask for my assistance since I was the course rep in that department. It was forbidden to have any intimate relationship with your course mate or anyone in the college for that matter, the penalty would be expulsion. But unfortunately for me, out of sheer lust and seduction on her part, and gross indiscipline and lack of self control on my part, I got intimate with her and we ended up committing fornication during one of our semester vacations. And it just happened once, of which out of deep regret and remorse I confessed the matter to the college Admin when the next semester resumed. We were panelled, after which I was suspended, while she was expelled.

During this time I was learning a skill sponsored by the college, of which I use to get paid some weekly stipend. After I was suspended I was also stopped from continuing my apprenticeship, because I was not to associate with any of the students or lecturers in the school while my suspension lasted. So I was without a job and without a source of income since I wasn't yet mastered on the skill. The condition that was given to me to resume my studies and apprenticeship was that I should go and get married before I could come back to college, so as not to be tempted to repeat my error. But I wasn't ready for marriage whether financially or any other wise for that matter. So while I was contemplating my next move, this girl came to me that she was pregnant, that she needed us to go and see her parents. I told her I had no money neither was I ready to father a child at this point in my life. I pleaded she should give me time to think about what next to do. Two weeks passed, and I called her to enquire about her welfare but her number wasn't reachable, I decided to go to her place, but I was told she had travelled a week ago to go see her family. A week later, I received a call from a woman telling me she was the girl's mother, that her daughter came home with a pregnancy, and she asked me if I was responsible for the pregnancy, I answered her in the affirmative. She then asked when I was coming to see her family. I told her I wasn't sure about coming to see them that I needed to speak to the girl first. She said okay, then later that day the girl called me, and I told her to come back for us to talk deliberate on the way forward. When she came she told me her parents (who are by the way divorced) will not accept her nor the pregnancy without me coming to see them for marriage arrangements.

I explained to her I wasn't ready for any such thing, that I have a calling to answer and a course to finish, that what happened between us was just a stupid and careless mistake that has been as a setback for me to achieve my goal, and that I was ready to overcome the trials and get back on track, and I explained to her that before then I had neither dated nor been intimate with anyone for over seven years, and so any kind of relationship or marriage was not even in my nearest future plans, and besides, I didn't even have a job, not to mention having enough money to embark on a marriage plan. She said she would never accept such excuse, that I should look for whatever means to make sure I come see her parents before her pregnancy becomes obvious. She also said that she needed money to move her belongings back to Imo state where her family resides. I agreed to raise some money for her. I went to do some menial jobs and raised some money, about ₦20k, which I gave to her and she traveled back to Owerri. From then on her parents kept calling and pressuring me to come and see them for marriage arrangements. I told them I was going to come, but just to introduce myself to them as the person responsible for their daughter's pregnancy not for any marriage arrangements. But they disagreed, that if I wasn't ready to come for marriage that I shouldn't bother coming. I pleaded with them to give me enough time to look for money to come and see them, but they instead started threatening me with court cases and arrests, at one time they brought the girl and some soldiers to my family house and harassed my family members including my mother.

So I later traveled to Benin city to go look for money. After one week of my arrival in Benin, I lost my phone and I couldn't retrieve my number. I lost connection with them until I got back to Uyo where I got her phone number from a friend of hers. At this time, I was told that they came to my house several times with police officers claiming I raped their daughter and impregnated her then absconded. At this, I established contact with the girl again and she told me that I should not bother her that she wasn't in the mood to talk to me, I kept calling her but she often ended up abusing me or we often times ended up in quarrels, so I left her alone for sometime.

Two weeks ago I related the matter to one of my distant uncles, who advised me to gather some money and go see her, I called her and told her I wanted to come and see her before she puts to bed, which is expected to be sometime next month (August). But she told me that she still stands by what her parents had said, if it's not for the marriage issue that I should not come, that I should rather send her the money I would use in coming so she can use it to buy the baby clothing and buy some hospital requirements before she puts to bed. I called her parents and they told me the same thing, and said if I don't come for the marriage agreement before she puts to bed, that after she's delivered of the baby I should forget ever coming, and should never mention that I have a child anywhere not to mention coming to claim it ever in the future. And that I should just forget about her and the child.

The issue now is this, I am a bit frustrated because I seem to have lost everything at the moment because of this issue; my calling, the skill I was learning is gone, I have no job aside the menial jobs I do at construction sites which isn't available regularly. Now the little I have saved so far, I am contemplating on whether to use the money to pay for my skills training and continue with it and start my life afresh and forget about her, the child, and her parents, or use the money to support her in her hospital requirements for her delivery. Because I don't want to be seen as abandoning her when she is in this condition, and I also don't want to give up on the child, though I'm not capable of taking care of the girl and the baby right now, and probably, I might end up getting married but not under my present circumstances. I know I've made a grave mistake and this is the consequences for not being true to myself and my calling, and I deeply regret it, and I've suffered for it in any way I can possibly imagine, but I also need to put my life back in order, because right now I'm so devastated that I'm contemplating terrible alternatives to survive the storm, I'm at a very critical moment of my life and I just feel like giving up on life altogether. Please I need your help and advice on this issue. Thanks.

PS. Please if anyone is willing to teach me any skill, I would be very grateful and willing to learn.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by emmyN(m): 10:42pm On Jul 24, 2021
Pastor Righteousness89 don go back for theology school shocked
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by AuroraBrls: 10:44pm On Jul 24, 2021
You are driving yourself crazy with this issue.

Unecessary pressure

That's what you are giving yourself

You didn't rape her

She has supportive parents

You are more broke than a Church rat

Bring out your SIM card

Break it and throw it away

Pack your bag and go far away and start life afresh in an economically lively city like Lagos

Forget that pulpit calling hustle for now

Hustle for any street of your choice for a year, whether selling or construction site etc

If the baby is truly yours, no matter how comfortable he or she is someday someone will call him or her a name to make him ask for his biological father

Don't let what you can control interfere with what you can.

Don't lose your mental health or sanity over this issue...it is a very minor issue. You didn't commit murder or not rape. That girls stupid family ulis trying to intimidate and maipulate you despite knowing you are total financially zero. If they mean well for you let them raise 1million for you to start a biz and take care of the girl and baby. Did you rape her?

Nonsense!

2 Likes

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Akwamkpuruamu: 10:44pm On Jul 24, 2021
Please can I DM You? God has not forgotten you. There's no burden he can't bear for you. Yes you made a mistake, but God's grace will see you through. I have seen humility, sincerity and a genuine heart of service to God in you. Don't give him to hasty decisions. We can walk together

Pls mail me integritybiofil@gmail.com
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Itzi8(m): 10:45pm On Jul 24, 2021
Greetings bro, you're more concerned about just yourself in all you wrote,and little attention to the embarrassment you put the Young girl through.

I don't know how best,but just take a brave step and do the needful,your reconciliation with life,peace and ease startup, as the family will give you guys all the needed support.

So now, consider yourself lucky that anytime and anything you plant in this country grows, apart from some stubborn European crops�.

Both raining and dry seasons as we call them, are not seasons, but weather conditions that still Favours your planting, that's if you take the bold step today.

Plant plant plant
Cassava, vegetables and raise the dust to Grace, GOD is compassionate, merciful and able. HIS judgements are not for men to decide.

Start Farming now.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Finalfantasy: 10:47pm On Jul 24, 2021
Your husband will cheat on you for being a poor piss in bed

CharisEleos:
Hm see how devil just used 5mins madness to destroy your peace and career...
Like why can't you people just be like Joseph in terms of self discipline...

Even the girl. Your parents sent you to school and the very first year, you're already sleeping with a man. Without protection for that matter..

If she's someone that has sense, should sex be the first thing she should go and be pursuing immediately she got to school or her career? SMH..

You see, that time you were about to engage in the act was when you should have done what youre doing here now. That is, reason and ask yourself some of the questions you're now posing to us. It is then you should have reasoned you didn't have a job yet and not ready to father a child or get married.

The bible that says flee every appearance of evil is correct after all.

You better go and see the family because the didn't force their daughter on you in the first place. So, now you don buy market, go and carry your goods.

Everytime Sex sex sex.. sex that doesn't give you a happy ending, is that one sex?

When I tell people I've been celibate for many years, they think it's because I'm trying to form super girl. It's because of all these nonsense super story that you men come up with once there's any little mistake plus the fact that my body is the temple of Holy Spirit and not for any coconut head man who's just looking for anywhere to ease himself.
Mtcheeeeewwwwwww.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Crabman: 10:47pm On Jul 24, 2021
my question bro is that, is yours or her parents well to do? Because her parents are obviously about their child mental health... If so get on with a small wedding and seek custody for your wife and kid with the comfortable side of u guys parents, by that u will be able to go back to school, focus on your dream while u plan for a quick way to settle down your family, don’t be too hard on yourself, we all make mistakes, let their be mutual understanding between everyone... enjoy your journey, it’s different for everyone

1 Like

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Kaybee7000(m): 10:47pm On Jul 24, 2021
Juliusmomoh:
You only had sex with her once. And the next she did was telling u that she's pregnant after several weeks... Is anyone thinking what am thing?



No mind am.. The guy get mind Bleep for theologian school. cheesy
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Danniedpastor(m): 10:47pm On Jul 24, 2021
CharisEleos:
Hm see how devil just used 5mins madness to destroy your peace and career...
Like why can't you people just be like Joseph in terms of self discipline...

Even the girl. Your parents sent you to school and the very first year, you're already sleeping with a man. Without protection for that matter..

If she's someone that has sense, should sex be the first thing she should go and be pursuing immediately she got to school or her career? SMH..

You see, that time you were about to engage in the act was when you should have done what youre doing here now. That is, reason and ask yourself some of the questions you're now posing to us. It is then you should have reasoned you didn't have a job yet and not ready to father a child or get married.

The bible that says flee every appearance of evil is correct after all.

You better go and see the family because the didn't force their daughter on you in the first place. So, now you don buy market, go and carry your goods.

Everytime Sex sex sex.. sex that doesn't give you a happy ending, is that one sex?

When I tell people I've been celibate for many years, they think it's because I'm trying to form super girl. It's because of all these nonsense super story that you men come up with once there's any little mistake plus the fact that my body is the temple of Holy Spirit and not for any coconut head man who's just looking for anywhere to ease himself.
Mtcheeeeewwwwwww.


God bless and keep you safe.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Fortyfifty(m): 10:48pm On Jul 24, 2021
I have something similar going on in my life though am already gainfully employed.
This explains why life isn't a fair game.
Now my advice is that since the parents are not ready to see you at the moment you should keep your cool.
Go invest and develop your self.
Send her money for upkeep when you have.
When u have stabilize your self then you can do things right with the family. That is if you think you are still ready to marry the girl.
At all times do not allow your emotions ride over your logic.
Good luck.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by NwaEzefuNaMba(m): 10:50pm On Jul 24, 2021
I have come to realise that broke people are more careless with women than well to do guys.

You made mention of "your calling", so if the pregnancy have not surfaced you would have joined the wagon of pastorprenuers and milk people of their sweat with that slogan? You were not called, stop forcing yourself to the body of christ and face your pussy pounding adventure.

Brace your self and face your challenges, next life you make underground research before diving into any pussy(even without life jacket).
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by BRATISLAVA: 10:50pm On Jul 24, 2021
Romanoff:
Wahala be like POS business, e dey every junction.

Una dey knack for theology school, una no even fear.

The devil is very smart, he just arrnged temptation keep for you for where your journey start, lack of self control didn't allow you see the Potiphar's wife sent to destroy your life.

Worse is while you have hope of going back to the school, she was expelled and now has a baby on the way.

It couldn't have cost you anything to take one or two of your uncles to go see her parents, explain to them that you don't have a job that you're doing now and can't support but they should provide you with a basic list for traditional rites so you can save towards it.

If they are reasonable parents with a daughter who is pregnant out of wedlock, they'd be lenient with the list.

This isn't going to be easy as a job is hard to come by and learning a skill will cost you and mean you can't even earn to support her or the baby.

For those who will stumble on this, if you know your calling or purpose on this earth, flee from sexual sin. Nothing destroys destiny like it.

How is she Potiphar's wife?

He's a fake theologian full of unbridled lust. His sole interest is sex, like all fake pastors. He's the one with the penis. If he said no and walked out, no sex would've happened. He enjoyed himself to completion with Potiphar's wife—without a condom even. He's suddenly remembered the line that he was seduced, yes, with his eyes wide open and his fly open, too. Our theological minds will flash to Jezebel while the meek little lamb he is was roped into a barn and defiled somehow.

Then he decided to keep radio silence, provoking Potiphar's wife's hand with the police. And now he wants to escape marriage to Potiphar's wife, because she's not yet divorced Potiphar.

1 Like

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by 300Spartans: 10:51pm On Jul 24, 2021
airminem:
"""PS. Please if anyone is willing to teach me any skill, I would be very grateful and willing to learn."""

cheesy


"We were panelled, after which I was suspended, while she was expelled."

Now she s ended with the stronger punishment.
Now you also have abandoned her with a baby.

Some parents should stop looking for shortcut husband for their daughter abeg.



GUY, STOP ROAMING ABOUT PREGNANTING ROAMING GIRLS.


meeeennnhhh...just one fvck she got pregnant... The girl was really hor...ny in her ovulation state..

The stupid guy no use condom...nonsense
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by alizma: 10:52pm On Jul 24, 2021
Priceless007:
Hello Nairalanders,

It's a long story, but I'll try to keep it short and to the vital points. Please endure the length.

There's a girl i met at a theological college in where I was studying to become a clergyman and also learning a skill under the civil engineering department of the college. She was my junior in the course, as I was a year away from graduating from my first course, while she was just a fresher. She was always having issues getting through her courses and projects and would always ask for my assistance since I was the course rep in that department. It was forbidden to have any intimate relationship with your course mate or anyone in the college for that matter, the penalty would be expulsion. But unfortunately for me, out of sheer lust and seduction on her part, and gross indiscipline and lack of self control on my part, I got intimate with her and we ended up committing fornication during one of our semester vacations. And it just happened once, of which out of deep regret and remorse I confessed the matter to the college Admin when the next semester resumed. We were panelled, after which I was suspended, while she was expelled.

During this time I was learning a skill sponsored by the college, of which I use to get paid some weekly stipend. After I was suspended I was also stopped from continuing my apprenticeship, because I was not to associate with any of the students or lecturers in the school while my suspension lasted. So I was without a job and without a source of income since I wasn't yet mastered on the skill. The condition that was given to me to resume my studies and apprenticeship was that I should go and get married before I could come back to college, so as not to be tempted to repeat my error. But I wasn't ready for marriage whether financially or any other wise for that matter. So while I was contemplating my next move, this girl came to me that she was pregnant, that she needed us to go and see her parents. I told her I had no money neither was I ready to father a child at this point in my life. I pleaded she should give me time to think about what next to do. Two weeks passed, and I called her to enquire about her welfare but her number wasn't reachable, I decided to go to her place, but I was told she had travelled a week ago to go see her family. A week later, I received a call from a woman telling me she was the girl's mother, that her daughter came home with a pregnancy, and she asked me if I was responsible for the pregnancy, I answered her in the affirmative. She then asked when I was coming to see her family. I told her I wasn't sure about coming to see them that I needed to speak to the girl first. She said okay, then later that day the girl called me, and I told her to come back for us to talk deliberate on the way forward. When she came she told me her parents (who are by the way divorced) will not accept her nor the pregnancy without me coming to see them for marriage arrangements.

I explained to her I wasn't ready for any such thing, that I have a calling to answer and a course to finish, that what happened between us was just a stupid and careless mistake that has been as a setback for me to achieve my goal, and that I was ready to overcome the trials and get back on track, and I explained to her that before then I had neither dated nor been intimate with anyone for over seven years, and so any kind of relationship or marriage was not even in my nearest future plans, and besides, I didn't even have a job, not to mention having enough money to embark on a marriage plan. She said she would never accept such excuse, that I should look for whatever means to make sure I come see her parents before her pregnancy becomes obvious. She also said that she needed money to move her belongings back to Imo state where her family resides. I agreed to raise some money for her. I went to do some menial jobs and raised some money, about ₦20k, which I gave to her and she traveled back to Owerri. From then on her parents kept calling and pressuring me to come and see them for marriage arrangements. I told them I was going to come, but just to introduce myself to them as the person responsible for their daughter's pregnancy not for any marriage arrangements. But they disagreed, that if I wasn't ready to come for marriage that I shouldn't bother coming. I pleaded with them to give me enough time to look for money to come and see them, but they instead started threatening me with court cases and arrests, at one time they brought the girl and some soldiers to my family house and harassed my family members including my mother.

So I later traveled to Benin city to go look for money. After one week of my arrival in Benin, I lost my phone and I couldn't retrieve my number. I lost connection with them until I got back to Uyo where I got her phone number from a friend of hers. At this time, I was told that they came to my house several times with police officers claiming I raped their daughter and impregnated her then absconded. At this, I established contact with the girl again and she told me that I should not bother her that she wasn't in the mood to talk to me, I kept calling her but she often ended up abusing me or we often times ended up in quarrels, so I left her alone for sometime.

Two weeks ago I related the matter to one of my distant uncles, who advised me to gather some money and go see her, I called her and told her I wanted to come and see her before she puts to bed, which is expected to be sometime next month (August). But she told me that she still stands by what her parents had said, if it's not for the marriage issue that I should not come, that I should rather send her the money I would use in coming so she can use it to buy the baby clothing and buy some hospital requirements before she puts to bed. I called her parents and they told me the same thing, and said if I don't come for the marriage agreement before she puts to bed, that after she's delivered of the baby I should forget ever coming, and should never mention that I have a child anywhere not to mention coming to claim it ever in the future. And that I should just forget about her and the child.

The issue now is this, I am a bit frustrated because I seem to have lost everything at the moment because of this issue; my calling, the skill I was learning is gone, I have no job aside the menial jobs I do at construction sites which isn't available regularly. Now the little I have saved so far, I am contemplating on whether to use the money to pay for my skills training and continue with it and start my life afresh and forget about her, the child, and her parents, or use the money to support her in her hospital requirements for her delivery. Because I don't want to be seen as abandoning her when she is in this condition, and I also don't want to give up on the child, though I'm not capable of taking care of the girl and the baby right now, and probably, I might end up getting married but not under my present circumstances. I know I've made a grave mistake and this is the consequences for not being true to myself and my calling, and I deeply regret it, and I've suffered for it in any way I can possibly imagine, but I also need to put my life back in order, because right now I'm so devastated that I'm contemplating terrible alternatives to survive the storm, I'm at a very critical moment of my life and I just feel like giving up on life altogether. Please I need your help and advice on this issue. Thanks.

PS. Please if anyone is willing to teach me any skill, I would be very grateful and willing to learn.
Since you are not willing to give up on the child and they are not reasonable enough to understand your situation and the circumstances under which you guys met, I want to encourage you to be brave and face life squarely, play the game with them, stop being truthful. What are my saying? It is time to be rugged. Tell them you are coming for the marriage, go there for the introduction with some elders and few necessary things. Then return home and claim to have been dupped of the money you wanted to use for the wedding by some people or something else, but make sure the first visit is a commitment visit. Now the case will be that they are asking you to come and finish the marriage right but they cannot claim that the girl's hand has not been given out in marriage traditionai. This will give you the right over the unborn child and even the lady. Then when things get better you can marry her properly
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Sambab(m): 10:52pm On Jul 24, 2021
Go and see her parents with one or 2 elders from your family. Explain to them about your present condition, and tell them you are not financially ok to marry and cater for her and unborn child now, but you will go back to school, then marry her after your program.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Miyachi: 10:53pm On Jul 24, 2021
Priceless007:
Hello Nairalanders,

It's a long story, but I'll try to keep it short and to the vital points. Please endure the length.

There's a girl i met at a theological college in where I was studying to become a clergyman...

This is touching. How something so seemingly insignificant as a one-night stand could have devastating consequences. It reminds me of Swoope's album, Sinema.

First things first, get your life on track. Fulfil your promise-- go and see her family but don't let anyone pressure you into any decision. You don't owe her marriage, you owe her your support though; she's carrying your child.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Romanoff(f): 10:53pm On Jul 24, 2021
BRATISLAVA:


How is she Potiphar's wife?

He's a fake theologian full of unbridled lust. His sole interest is sex, like all fake pastors. He's the one with the penis. If he said no and walked out, no sex would've happened. He enjoyed himself to completion with Potiphar's wife—without a condom even. He's suddenly remembered the line that he was seduced, yes, with his eyes wide open and his fly open, too. Our theological minds will flash to Jezebel while the meek little lamb he is was roped into a barn and defiled somehow.

Then he decided to keep radio silence, provoking Potiphar's wife's hand with the police. And now he wants to escape marriage to Potiphar's wife, because she's not yet divorced Potiphar.

He did say he was celibate for a while before he fell. The difference between people who fell and people who overcome temptation is that people who overcome temptation sees the temptation coming from far and don't even wait for it to come close. They Flee.

People that fall always think they are in control and can't fall.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by NwaEzefuNaMba(m): 10:53pm On Jul 24, 2021
Akwamkpuruamu:
Please can I DM You? God has not forgotten you. There's no burden he can't bear for you. Yes you made a mistake, but God's grace will see you through. I have seen humility, sincerity and a genuine heart of service to God in you. Don't give him to hasty decisions. We can walk together

Pls mail me integritybiofil@gmail.com

Someone with this kind of moniker can not offer anything positive.

Wretched scammer.

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