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Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. - Family (12) - Nairaland

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Help! I'm Feeling Guilty Of Ruining Someone's Marriage / Namibian Man Creates Baby Saver Box For Unplanned Pregnancy And Unwanted Babies / Some People Are Insensitive - Pregnancy Is Hard (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Parashooter: 8:42am On Jul 25, 2021
These guys that indulge in sex/sexual activities while claiming they have a calling does so with clear intents...

Oga OP,go & marry that girl because she is a trap you jumped to by yourself for yourself,no long story.

Check the pictures below & quote me if you want more evidences

Modified: https://www.nairaland.com/6304524/copulating-catholic-priest-johnpaul-chukwuma

1 Like

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by CBARRY1: 8:45am On Jul 25, 2021
TOO LENGTHY THAT I EVEN LOST THE PIECE OF ADVICE I INTENDED TO OFFER.
I am deeply sorry.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Emmanuel909090: 8:47am On Jul 25, 2021
Aurelius1:
Is that so called " friend" impotent? Or, does he have low sperm count?

Thats his interest.
Not interested, another man is interested, you are pained.
You expect her to suffer depression all alone, nigerian men.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by babavik: 8:48am On Jul 25, 2021
Na wa oo
You're in your final year and you have a small source of income, then you allowed the devil to come and fart on your head?
Truth is whatever money you have now keep it to yourself, go with one or two people and explain your situation to her parents. Try everything possible to get back on track, marriage is not by force and believe me you MIGHT never be happy in the marriage. Move on but maintain a close relationship like calling and sending her money when you can.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by generalwo(m): 8:49am On Jul 25, 2021
Priceless007:
Hello Nairalanders,

It's a long story, but I'll try to keep it short and to the vital points. Please endure the length.

There's a girl i met at a theological college in where I was studying to become a clergyman and also learning a skill under the civil engineering department of the college. She was my junior in the course, as I was a year away from graduating from my first course, while she was just a fresher. She was always having issues getting through her courses and projects and would always ask for my assistance since I was the course rep in that department. It was forbidden to have any intimate relationship with your course mate or anyone in the college for that matter, the penalty would be expulsion. But unfortunately for me, out of sheer lust and seduction on her part, and gross indiscipline and lack of self control on my part, I got intimate with her and we ended up committing fornication during one of our semester vacations. And it just happened once, of which out of deep regret and remorse I confessed the matter to the college Admin when the next semester resumed. We were panelled, after which I was suspended, while she was expelled.

During this time I was learning a skill sponsored by the college, of which I use to get paid some weekly stipend. After I was suspended I was also stopped from continuing my apprenticeship, because I was not to associate with any of the students or lecturers in the school while my suspension lasted. So I was without a job and without a source of income since I wasn't yet mastered on the skill. The condition that was given to me to resume my studies and apprenticeship was that I should go and get married before I could come back to college, so as not to be tempted to repeat my error. But I wasn't ready for marriage whether financially or any other wise for that matter. So while I was contemplating my next move, this girl came to me that she was pregnant, that she needed us to go and see her parents. I told her I had no money neither was I ready to father a child at this point in my life. I pleaded she should give me time to think about what next to do. Two weeks passed, and I called her to enquire about her welfare but her number wasn't reachable, I decided to go to her place, but I was told she had travelled a week ago to go see her family. A week later, I received a call from a woman telling me she was the girl's mother, that her daughter came home with a pregnancy, and she asked me if I was responsible for the pregnancy, I answered her in the affirmative. She then asked when I was coming to see her family. I told her I wasn't sure about coming to see them that I needed to speak to the girl first. She said okay, then later that day the girl called me, and I told her to come back for us to talk deliberate on the way forward. When she came she told me her parents (who are by the way divorced) will not accept her nor the pregnancy without me coming to see them for marriage arrangements.

I explained to her I wasn't ready for any such thing, that I have a calling to answer and a course to finish, that what happened between us was just a stupid and careless mistake that has been as a setback for me to achieve my goal, and that I was ready to overcome the trials and get back on track, and I explained to her that before then I had neither dated nor been intimate with anyone for over seven years, and so any kind of relationship or marriage was not even in my nearest future plans, and besides, I didn't even have a job, not to mention having enough money to embark on a marriage plan. She said she would never accept such excuse, that I should look for whatever means to make sure I come see her parents before her pregnancy becomes obvious. She also said that she needed money to move her belongings back to Imo state where her family resides. I agreed to raise some money for her. I went to do some menial jobs and raised some money, about ₦20k, which I gave to her and she traveled back to Owerri. From then on her parents kept calling and pressuring me to come and see them for marriage arrangements. I told them I was going to come, but just to introduce myself to them as the person responsible for their daughter's pregnancy not for any marriage arrangements. But they disagreed, that if I wasn't ready to come for marriage that I shouldn't bother coming. I pleaded with them to give me enough time to look for money to come and see them, but they instead started threatening me with court cases and arrests, at one time they brought the girl and some soldiers to my family house and harassed my family members including my mother.

So I later traveled to Benin city to go look for money. After one week of my arrival in Benin, I lost my phone and I couldn't retrieve my number. I lost connection with them until I got back to Uyo where I got her phone number from a friend of hers. At this time, I was told that they came to my house several times with police officers claiming I raped their daughter and impregnated her then absconded. At this, I established contact with the girl again and she told me that I should not bother her that she wasn't in the mood to talk to me, I kept calling her but she often ended up abusing me or we often times ended up in quarrels, so I left her alone for sometime.

Two weeks ago I related the matter to one of my distant uncles, who advised me to gather some money and go see her, I called her and told her I wanted to come and see her before she puts to bed, which is expected to be sometime next month (August). But she told me that she still stands by what her parents had said, if it's not for the marriage issue that I should not come, that I should rather send her the money I would use in coming so she can use it to buy the baby clothing and buy some hospital requirements before she puts to bed. I called her parents and they told me the same thing, and said if I don't come for the marriage agreement before she puts to bed, that after she's delivered of the baby I should forget ever coming, and should never mention that I have a child anywhere not to mention coming to claim it ever in the future. And that I should just forget about her and the child.

The issue now is this, I am a bit frustrated because I seem to have lost everything at the moment because of this issue; my calling, the skill I was learning is gone, I have no job aside the menial jobs I do at construction sites which isn't available regularly. Now the little I have saved so far, I am contemplating on whether to use the money to pay for my skills training and continue with it and start my life afresh and forget about her, the child, and her parents, or use the money to support her in her hospital requirements for her delivery. Because I don't want to be seen as abandoning her when she is in this condition, and I also don't want to give up on the child, though I'm not capable of taking care of the girl and the baby right now, and probably, I might end up getting married but not under my present circumstances. I know I've made a grave mistake and this is the consequences for not being true to myself and my calling, and I deeply regret it, and I've suffered for it in any way I can possibly imagine, but I also need to put my life back in order, because right now I'm so devastated that I'm contemplating terrible alternatives to survive the storm, I'm at a very critical moment of my life and I just feel like giving up on life altogether. Please I need your help and advice on this issue. Thanks.

PS. Please if anyone is willing to teach me any skill, I would be very grateful and willing to learn.
..... Honestly I won't blame or judge you.... It's your right as a human to be scared and confused........ I will keep what u should have done or not done to myself and I will tell you just this.... Go back to God, ask for forgiveness and use the little money u have to pay for the girl's bride prize..... Arrange with her parents (that's if they are reasonable) for the girl to stay with them with the baby for a while until you're able to get an apartment of your own so u can bring them over.... Make sure u send something to them from time to time.... Even if its 1k....just make sure u hustle and send something home to them...... This is where u become a man bro...... Please never ever say u made a mistake having that child...... Tell your child that he or she is a blessing.... Most times in life, such situations may just be what you need to spring to success in life..... See what has happened as one of those things a man must face in life..... Don't abandon the child or the girl..... Do the marriage as your money reach..... Even if na inside palour, do am...... There is no shame in a small marriage bro...... God loves u and I am sure your unborn baby loves u too and would not like to see u sad, confused or hurt because of him or her..... Embrace what has happened...... You're a man..... God bless u sir
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by FORWARDEVERLY: 8:51am On Jul 25, 2021
You are a Fool..
When you goofed was when you used your own mouth to report your own excapades to your institution authorities..
Just like a Uni student that did malpractice and wasn't caught but reported himself to the Dean of Academics all in the name of feeling guilty and remorse.. because of your leaky mouth, she was expelled and you want to succeed, never..
Something you would have confessed one on one only to God and moved on..
You think say most of your popular pastors no get skeletons for their cuboard ??
Nothing beats Street OT..
Op you are daft, No pity for you...
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by toluleke(m): 8:52am On Jul 25, 2021
You are all about career is ministry a career to you or a genuine call by God listen to Bro Gbile Akanni

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by macrodata(m): 8:53am On Jul 25, 2021
mrblessed:
How are you sure that the pregnancy belongs to you, considering what you have narrated? Come on, it is possible it isn't yours, and she has cleverly pinned it on you knowing you are a bit naive about relationship in particular and women in general.
Is one time sex not enough for pregnancy? Help me understand.

1 Like

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by FORWARDEVERLY: 8:56am On Jul 25, 2021
Parashooter:
These guys that indulge in sex/sexual activities while claiming they have a calling does so with clear intents...

Oga OP,go & marry that girl because she is a trap you jumped to by yourself for yourself,no long story.

Check the pictures below & quote me if you want more evidences


My own na more gist I want, in respect to that screenshots.. guy gist me abeeg.. the babe na your Ex ??

1 Like

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by GAYENI72(m): 8:56am On Jul 25, 2021
Check my profile and call me

It is well

Priceless007:
Hello Nairalanders,

It's a long story, but I'll try to keep it short and to the vital points. Please endure the length.

There's a girl i met at a theological college in where I was studying to become a clergyman and also learning a skill under the civil engineering department of the college. She was my junior in the course, as I was a year away from graduating from my first course, while she was just a fresher. She was always having issues getting through her courses and projects and would always ask for my assistance since I was the course rep in that department. It was forbidden to have any intimate relationship with your course mate or anyone in the college for that matter, the penalty would be expulsion. But unfortunately for me, out of sheer lust and seduction on her part, and gross indiscipline and lack of self control on my part, I got intimate with her and we ended up committing fornication during one of our semester vacations. And it just happened once, of which out of deep regret and remorse I confessed the matter to the college Admin when the next semester resumed. We were panelled, after which I was suspended, while she was expelled.

During this time I was learning a skill sponsored by the college, of which I use to get paid some weekly stipend. After I was suspended I was also stopped from continuing my apprenticeship, because I was not to associate with any of the students or lecturers in the school while my suspension lasted. So I was without a job and without a source of income since I wasn't yet mastered on the skill. The condition that was given to me to resume my studies and apprenticeship was that I should go and get married before I could come back to college, so as not to be tempted to repeat my error. But I wasn't ready for marriage whether financially or any other wise for that matter. So while I was contemplating my next move, this girl came to me that she was pregnant, that she needed us to go and see her parents. I told her I had no money neither was I ready to father a child at this point in my life. I pleaded she should give me time to think about what next to do. Two weeks passed, and I called her to enquire about her welfare but her number wasn't reachable, I decided to go to her place, but I was told she had travelled a week ago to go see her family. A week later, I received a call from a woman telling me she was the girl's mother, that her daughter came home with a pregnancy, and she asked me if I was responsible for the pregnancy, I answered her in the affirmative. She then asked when I was coming to see her family. I told her I wasn't sure about coming to see them that I needed to speak to the girl first. She said okay, then later that day the girl called me, and I told her to come back for us to talk deliberate on the way forward. When she came she told me her parents (who are by the way divorced) will not accept her nor the pregnancy without me coming to see them for marriage arrangements.

I explained to her I wasn't ready for any such thing, that I have a calling to answer and a course to finish, that what happened between us was just a stupid and careless mistake that has been as a setback for me to achieve my goal, and that I was ready to overcome the trials and get back on track, and I explained to her that before then I had neither dated nor been intimate with anyone for over seven years, and so any kind of relationship or marriage was not even in my nearest future plans, and besides, I didn't even have a job, not to mention having enough money to embark on a marriage plan. She said she would never accept such excuse, that I should look for whatever means to make sure I come see her parents before her pregnancy becomes obvious. She also said that she needed money to move her belongings back to Imo state where her family resides. I agreed to raise some money for her. I went to do some menial jobs and raised some money, about ₦20k, which I gave to her and she traveled back to Owerri. From then on her parents kept calling and pressuring me to come and see them for marriage arrangements. I told them I was going to come, but just to introduce myself to them as the person responsible for their daughter's pregnancy not for any marriage arrangements. But they disagreed, that if I wasn't ready to come for marriage that I shouldn't bother coming. I pleaded with them to give me enough time to look for money to come and see them, but they instead started threatening me with court cases and arrests, at one time they brought the girl and some soldiers to my family house and harassed my family members including my mother.

So I later traveled to Benin city to go look for money. After one week of my arrival in Benin, I lost my phone and I couldn't retrieve my number. I lost connection with them until I got back to Uyo where I got her phone number from a friend of hers. At this time, I was told that they came to my house several times with police officers claiming I raped their daughter and impregnated her then absconded. At this, I established contact with the girl again and she told me that I should not bother her that she wasn't in the mood to talk to me, I kept calling her but she often ended up abusing me or we often times ended up in quarrels, so I left her alone for sometime.

Two weeks ago I related the matter to one of my distant uncles, who advised me to gather some money and go see her, I called her and told her I wanted to come and see her before she puts to bed, which is expected to be sometime next month (August). But she told me that she still stands by what her parents had said, if it's not for the marriage issue that I should not come, that I should rather send her the money I would use in coming so she can use it to buy the baby clothing and buy some hospital requirements before she puts to bed. I called her parents and they told me the same thing, and said if I don't come for the marriage agreement before she puts to bed, that after she's delivered of the baby I should forget ever coming, and should never mention that I have a child anywhere not to mention coming to claim it ever in the future. And that I should just forget about her and the child.

The issue now is this, I am a bit frustrated because I seem to have lost everything at the moment because of this issue; my calling, the skill I was learning is gone, I have no job aside the menial jobs I do at construction sites which isn't available regularly. Now the little I have saved so far, I am contemplating on whether to use the money to pay for my skills training and continue with it and start my life afresh and forget about her, the child, and her parents, or use the money to support her in her hospital requirements for her delivery. Because I don't want to be seen as abandoning her when she is in this condition, and I also don't want to give up on the child, though I'm not capable of taking care of the girl and the baby right now, and probably, I might end up getting married but not under my present circumstances. I know I've made a grave mistake and this is the consequences for not being true to myself and my calling, and I deeply regret it, and I've suffered for it in any way I can possibly imagine, but I also need to put my life back in order, because right now I'm so devastated that I'm contemplating terrible alternatives to survive the storm, I'm at a very critical moment of my life and I just feel like giving up on life altogether. Please I need your help and advice on this issue. Thanks.

PS. Please if anyone is willing to teach me any skill, I would be very grateful and willing to learn.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Babara1994(m): 8:59am On Jul 25, 2021
CharisEleos:
Hm see how devil just used 5mins madness to destroy your peace and career...
Like why can't you people just be like Joseph in terms of self discipline...

Even the girl. Your parents sent you to school and the very first year, you're already sleeping with a man. Without protection for that matter..

If she's someone that has sense, should sex be the first thing she should go and be pursuing immediately she got to school or her career? SMH..

You see, that time you were about to engage in the act was when you should have done what youre doing here now. That is, reason and ask yourself some of the questions you're now posing to us. It is then you should have reasoned you didn't have a job yet and not ready to father a child or get married.

The bible that says flee every appearance of evil is correct after all.

You better go and see the family because the didn't force their daughter on you in the first place. So, now you don buy market, go and carry your goods.

Everytime Sex sex sex.. sex that doesn't give you a happy ending, is that one sex?

When I tell people I've been celibate for many years, they think it's because I'm trying to form super girl. It's because of all these nonsense super story that you men come up with once there's any little mistake plus the fact that my body is the temple of Holy Spirit and not for any coconut head man who's just looking for anywhere to ease himself.
Mtcheeeeewwwwwww.

Modified

Those of you calling yourselves a hypocrite for a harmless comment I made are the real hypocrites because if you were the girls parents, will give the op a bear hug for doing that to your daughter?

What you cant take, you're here advising someone to do it to others. Generation of vipers. Keep encouraging evil.

This is the opportunity you're supposed to use to condemn such wrong and immoral act so that the small boys and girls here can learn and desist from it, but you're busy spewing trash all over the place. Before you know it, it's already at your door step staring you in the face. Then ill see how you'll handle it will a wide smile.


Imo girls can bleep anything in a man. They too like sex
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by LienwaltAbel(m): 9:02am On Jul 25, 2021
Wait, you reported yourself and the girl and the girl bore the brunt of the offence while you bounced off lightly and you expect her to shine her 32 teeth and be happy. You and the girl are foolish, if you don't love a girl enough to marry her later why have unprotected sex? If you don't have the financial capability to take care of mother and child why have unprotected sex? This question goes to the both of you.

The marriage is already a failure from the start and just by looking at how messed up her family is you should have predicted the impending doom that was about to befall you by entangling yourself with such a girl, but no you shunned all that and wanted to have a taste of what sex feels like, we all do want that yes, but think before acting.

Now the true fact about this is that she is obviously going to ruin you because she got expelled, she might have had a rational conversation with you if you both dealt with it maturely but no, you had to tell. Just go to that house tell them the truth about the already failed marriage and agree with them to send stipends to take care of mother and child (I'll advise you to monitor those stipends because the woman might get angry that the baby ruined her life just by it's mere existence) till the woman probably remarries, left with me you don't need to agree with them just drop it as a final statement, they can take it however they want. Go and look for a job, if you love writing articles and all that, there are freelance sites like writer.ph, iwriter where you can trade your skills for money, if you want you can go into carpentry. Just find a job and fulfill the above unless you want to die young.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by LienwaltAbel(m): 9:06am On Jul 25, 2021
Parashooter:
These guys that indulge in sex/sexual activities while claiming they have a calling does so with clear intents...

Oga OP,go & marry that girl because she is a trap you jumped to by yourself for yourself,no long story.

Check the pictures below & quote me if you want more evidences
shockedshockedshocked

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Parashooter: 9:08am On Jul 25, 2021
FORWARDEVERLY:



My own na more gist I want, in respect to that screenshots.. guy gist me abeeg.. the babe na[b]your Ex??[/b]



Fools such as her can't be my ex..

https://www.nairaland.com/6304524/copulating-catholic-priest-johnpaul-chukwuma
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Nobody: 9:11am On Jul 25, 2021
.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by smartNerd: 9:11am On Jul 25, 2021
I have been impressed with the urgency of
doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply.
Being willing is not enough; we must do. --
Leonardo da Vinci

www.nairaland.com/attachments/13900061_besogood_jpeg0d8d05a89aba72a0a334e06da1bc5339
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Nobody: 9:13am On Jul 25, 2021
webshopNG:
Anyone noticed, the OP writes well?
Writing gigs actually pay well and i think you should look for writing jobs out there. Also try learn copywriting.

You are one of the first person that has made mention of a skill that the OP needs.
The other ones above are just yapping blames and blames alone.

Nice one.

2 Likes

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by bamisho: 9:15am On Jul 25, 2021
All those telling you to focus on yourself and career while leaving the babies care and finances to the girl and her parents are giving you advice that will distroy you . Anyone that abandon’s his child’s responsibilities will not do well in life.

Later you will say the mother poisoned the child’s mind against you

1 Like

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Nobody: 9:16am On Jul 25, 2021
BRATISLAVA:


Anti fake pastors.

The church can exist for all eternity, but those people called fake pastors must be flushed out. Most especially the ones who are lustful and constantly looking for sexual experiences with women under their care.

If you have a problem with that, maybe you're a fornicator who preaches righteousness and Holiness and grace.


I have no problem with that but what's the next solution you next offered him aside the blames you have repeatedly heaped on him.

I read up there the OP asked if anyone teaches him a skill that he would use in earning to remedy the mistake he has already made.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by FORWARDEVERLY: 9:18am On Jul 25, 2021
Parashooter:




Fools such as her can't be my ex..

https://www.nairaland.com/6304524/copulating-catholic-priest-johnpaul-chukwuma




Wow wow wow ..
Allahu Akbar..
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Dnight(m): 9:20am On Jul 25, 2021
Hmmmm
No matter what
Do not marry into that family
They are devils
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by bamisho: 9:22am On Jul 25, 2021
Danzakidakura:
My Advice forget about the girl and her family, concentrate on your career later when you are successful the child and his mother will look for you .

What evil advice. If everyone decides to face their life who will take care of the child he is half responsible for ?

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by mudiana(m): 9:23am On Jul 25, 2021
Sterope:
Maybe if he hadn't ruined her life because he was "seduced", she won't be hellbent on ruining his life as well.

That last sentence, you quoted the wrong person. Keep your small thinking to yourself please.

big thinker! wicked heart! Ruiner of lives!
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by somtochukwu161: 9:24am On Jul 25, 2021
Hmmmm the deed has been done no need to regret because it is a two way thing is either like this or like that. Get an elderly person u relate with xplain to him to helping u by visiting the family first then go with him for the second time and see the family tell them ur situation all this things should be time framed make sure u do this before she puts to bed. U don't pay pride price of a pregnant woman visit them and familarize with them. Is not a do or die affair
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by UnimkeAk(m): 9:25am On Jul 25, 2021
Priceless007:
Hello Nairalanders,

It's a long story, but I'll try to keep it short and to the vital points. Please endure the length.

There's a girl i met at a theological college in where I was studying to become a clergyman and also learning a skill under the civil engineering department of the college. She was my junior in the course, as I was a year away from graduating from my first course, while she was just a fresher. She was always having issues getting through her courses and projects and would always ask for my assistance since I was the course rep in that department. It was forbidden to have any intimate relationship with your course mate or anyone in the college for that matter, the penalty would be expulsion. But unfortunately for me, out of sheer lust and seduction on her part, and gross indiscipline and lack of self control on my part, I got intimate with her and we ended up committing fornication during one of our semester vacations. And it just happened once, of which out of deep regret and remorse I confessed the matter to the college Admin when the next semester resumed. We were panelled, after which I was suspended, while she was expelled.

During this time I was learning a skill sponsored by the college, of which I use to get paid some weekly stipend. After I was suspended I was also stopped from continuing my apprenticeship, because I was not to associate with any of the students or lecturers in the school while my suspension lasted. So I was without a job and without a source of income since I wasn't yet mastered on the skill. The condition that was given to me to resume my studies and apprenticeship was that I should go and get married before I could come back to college, so as not to be tempted to repeat my error. But I wasn't ready for marriage whether financially or any other wise for that matter. So while I was contemplating my next move, this girl came to me that she was pregnant, that she needed us to go and see her parents. I told her I had no money neither was I ready to father a child at this point in my life. I pleaded she should give me time to think about what next to do. Two weeks passed, and I called her to enquire about her welfare but her number wasn't reachable, I decided to go to her place, but I was told she had travelled a week ago to go see her family. A week later, I received a call from a woman telling me she was the girl's mother, that her daughter came home with a pregnancy, and she asked me if I was responsible for the pregnancy, I answered her in the affirmative. She then asked when I was coming to see her family. I told her I wasn't sure about coming to see them that I needed to speak to the girl first. She said okay, then later that day the girl called me, and I told her to come back for us to talk deliberate on the way forward. When she came she told me her parents (who are by the way divorced) will not accept her nor the pregnancy without me coming to see them for marriage arrangements.

I explained to her I wasn't ready for any such thing, that I have a calling to answer and a course to finish, that what happened between us was just a stupid and careless mistake that has been as a setback for me to achieve my goal, and that I was ready to overcome the trials and get back on track, and I explained to her that before then I had neither dated nor been intimate with anyone for over seven years, and so any kind of relationship or marriage was not even in my nearest future plans, and besides, I didn't even have a job, not to mention having enough money to embark on a marriage plan. She said she would never accept such excuse, that I should look for whatever means to make sure I come see her parents before her pregnancy becomes obvious. She also said that she needed money to move her belongings back to Imo state where her family resides. I agreed to raise some money for her. I went to do some menial jobs and raised some money, about ₦20k, which I gave to her and she traveled back to Owerri. From then on her parents kept calling and pressuring me to come and see them for marriage arrangements. I told them I was going to come, but just to introduce myself to them as the person responsible for their daughter's pregnancy not for any marriage arrangements. But they disagreed, that if I wasn't ready to come for marriage that I shouldn't bother coming. I pleaded with them to give me enough time to look for money to come and see them, but they instead started threatening me with court cases and arrests, at one time they brought the girl and some soldiers to my family house and harassed my family members including my mother.

So I later traveled to Benin city to go look for money. After one week of my arrival in Benin, I lost my phone and I couldn't retrieve my number. I lost connection with them until I got back to Uyo where I got her phone number from a friend of hers. At this time, I was told that they came to my house several times with police officers claiming I raped their daughter and impregnated her then absconded. At this, I established contact with the girl again and she told me that I should not bother her that she wasn't in the mood to talk to me, I kept calling her but she often ended up abusing me or we often times ended up in quarrels, so I left her alone for sometime.

Two weeks ago I related the matter to one of my distant uncles, who advised me to gather some money and go see her, I called her and told her I wanted to come and see her before she puts to bed, which is expected to be sometime next month (August). But she told me that she still stands by what her parents had said, if it's not for the marriage issue that I should not come, that I should rather send her the money I would use in coming so she can use it to buy the baby clothing and buy some hospital requirements before she puts to bed. I called her parents and they told me the same thing, and said if I don't come for the marriage agreement before she puts to bed, that after she's delivered of the baby I should forget ever coming, and should never mention that I have a child anywhere not to mention coming to claim it ever in the future. And that I should just forget about her and the child.

The issue now is this, I am a bit frustrated because I seem to have lost everything at the moment because of this issue; my calling, the skill I was learning is gone, I have no job aside the menial jobs I do at construction sites which isn't available regularly. Now the little I have saved so far, I am contemplating on whether to use the money to pay for my skills training and continue with it and start my life afresh and forget about her, the child, and her parents, or use the money to support her in her hospital requirements for her delivery. Because I don't want to be seen as abandoning her when she is in this condition, and I also don't want to give up on the child, though I'm not capable of taking care of the girl and the baby right now, and probably, I might end up getting married but not under my present circumstances. I know I've made a grave mistake and this is the consequences for not being true to myself and my calling, and I deeply regret it, and I've suffered for it in any way I can possibly imagine, but I also need to put my life back in order, because right now I'm so devastated that I'm contemplating terrible alternatives to survive the storm, I'm at a very critical moment of my life and I just feel like giving up on life altogether. Please I need your help and advice on this issue. Thanks.

PS. Please if anyone is willing to teach me any skill, I would be very grateful and willing to learn.
You no use condom ... Ebot !!!
You no buy post pill - 400, or postinor 800 give the girl.. Unam ikot
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by Mcfi(m): 9:34am On Jul 25, 2021
airminem:
"""PS. Please if anyone is willing to teach me any skill, I would be very grateful and willing to learn."""

cheesy


"We were panelled, after which I was suspended, while she was expelled."

Now she s ended with the stronger punishment.
Now you also have abandoned her with a baby.

Some parents should stop looking for shortcut husband for their daughter abeg.



GUY, STOP ROAMING ABOUT PREGNANTING ROAMING GIRLS.




Come and learn programming

1 Like

Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by TechWows: 9:40am On Jul 25, 2021
Best Comment and Advice ever! May you fully fulfill your Glorious Destiny in JESUS' Name!
CharisEleos:
Hm see how devil just used 5mins madness to destroy your peace and career...
Like why can't you people just be like Joseph in terms of self discipline...

Even the girl. Your parents sent you to school and the very first year, you're already sleeping with a man. Without protection for that matter..

If she's someone that has sense, should sex be the first thing she should go and be pursuing immediately she got to school or her career? SMH..

You see, that time you were about to engage in the act was when you should have done what youre doing here now. That is, reason and ask yourself some of the questions you're now posing to us. It is then you should have reasoned you didn't have a job yet and not ready to father a child or get married.

The bible that says flee every appearance of evil is correct after all.

You better go and see the family because the didn't force their daughter on you in the first place. So, now you don buy market, go and carry your goods.

Everytime Sex sex sex.. sex that doesn't give you a happy ending, is that one sex?

When I tell people I've been celibate for many years, they think it's because I'm trying to form super girl. It's because of all these nonsense super story that you men come up with once there's any little mistake plus the fact that my body is the temple of Holy Spirit and not for any coconut head man who's just looking for anywhere to ease himself.
Mtcheeeeewwwwwww.

Modified

Those of you calling yourselves a hypocrite for a harmless comment I made are the real hypocrites because if you were the girls parents, will give the op a bear hug for doing that to your daughter?

What you cant take, you're here advising someone to do it to others. Generation of vipers. Keep encouraging evil.

This is the opportunity you're supposed to use to condemn such wrong and immoral act so that the small boys and girls here can learn and desist from it, but you're busy spewing trash all over the place. Before you know it, it's already at your door step staring you in the face. Then ill see how you'll handle it will a wide smile.


Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by realglob(m): 9:43am On Jul 25, 2021
You need to go see the family as a matter of urgency.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by TechWows: 9:45am On Jul 25, 2021
Mcfi:



Come and learn programming
Please, I want to learn Programming. What is your email address?
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by gmode: 9:46am On Jul 25, 2021
I don't know you but I think you need to get rid of emotions and move on. Yes, a baby is coming but how sure are you she belongs to you. Well, even when you are her father, the mom still has to be considerate. She knows you better than the parents. Marriage is consensual not instigated. Her standing by her parents is a strong message she is not gonna change even in marriage. Pity her today and stand to regret the rest of years ahead. If you can, distance yourself from them and move on. But before that, commit part payment were you want to enroll the new skill. You can then assist her from the little money you have left to care for the coming baby. Trust God, move on, focus on your future and come back for your child later.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by labi1977(m): 9:54am On Jul 25, 2021
Parashooter:
These guys that indulge in sex/sexual activities while claiming they have a calling does so with clear intents...

Oga OP,go & marry that girl because she is a trap you jumped to by yourself for yourself,no long story.

Check the pictures below & quote me if you want more evidences

Modified: https://www.nairaland.com/6304524/copulating-catholic-priest-johnpaul-chukwuma

Wicked fool so after destroying these people's lives since December you are still posting about this thing; they HV both been destroyed, what do you want again, devil. You should be arrested for continuing this nonsense and stealing and posting their WhatsApp chat. Thief.
Re: Help! An Unwanted Pregnancy Is Ruining My Life. by FarmTech(m): 10:00am On Jul 25, 2021
Juliusmomoh:
You only had sex with her once. And the next she did was telling u that she's pregnant after several weeks... Is anyone thinking what am thing?

.
The child might not be his oo. But he made a terrible mistake. For those who haven't made such mistake yet, I advise them to keep away from girls with seductive behaviors and dressing. Bad companionship will always corrupt good morals.

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