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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? (17306 Views)
When you want a Slave In The Name Of Wife Material. / Akwa Ibom Lady Frying Garri & Everyone Is Calling Her Wife Material / Is She A Wife Material? (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by MISSCONGENIALITY(f): 10:38am On Jul 27, 2021 |
I've come to realize that it's only a man who's not ready to settle down that finds fault in every woman they meet. When a man is ready, he can get a wife from the women in his past, the women in his area, at his work place or in the church or even from the streets. A man who's ready to marry can decide that lady that has dated for 4yrs who has practically done wifely duties for him and worshiped him is not good enough for him. A man who's ready to settle down might meet s girl today and next month they are getting married. A man who's ready doesn't do testing, tasting or behavioral analysis for 2yrs just to know the girl better. When a man is ready to settle down, you will be surprised how he does that within months and overlook some thinks he took serious when he was still thinking whether to marry or not to marry. So all this talk of she likes money, she doesn't know how to cook, she has bad character comes from those who are not ready.. The truth is when you find the ONE, you won't have to pretend to be poor or rich to win their love. 3 Likes |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 10:42am On Jul 27, 2021 |
ford101:Let me give a practical example So I have someone I know who I'd say has been static for year's, who's been disrespected severally and I'm like "guy, nothing will change and as close as we are,I won't pray for any woman to be with you in this condition, you'll be wasting each others time,you need to do........,be progressive even if it's in one life aspect,if she ditches you tomorrow,I won't fault her at all. We need to understand that some people are comfortable in their insufficiencies and lack the dexterity to take actions and life changing Risk's.. Life is calculative at times,a man who has no plot on how to go about being successful and only saying Lucra... Don't worry when I buy my Benz, we'll do .., I tell him point blank,dude stop dreaming,wake up,if you continue like this,you won't even buy Bicycle. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 10:46am On Jul 27, 2021 |
jy2kbeyond:This is how I feel about myself and about life If I have nothing, I'm nothing |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Anazp: 10:47am On Jul 27, 2021 |
Lucrativress:you went vulgar when you called men worthless. You biitchhth |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by jimmychang: 10:48am On Jul 27, 2021 |
Lucrativress: Please aunty I was enjoying your argument,stay on track please.You are going into another dimension. |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 10:50am On Jul 27, 2021 |
ford101:Devaluing yourself and wasting your time is what you're doing She is not doing you any favour by staying with you when you don't have much. Understand something,she staying with you when you don't have much doesn't determine she being a good woman,this is exactly the point I'm driving at. What you're looking for in your spouse,her qualities is what determines "your good woman". If only people mentioning me will just understand this.. 2 Likes |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by crackhaus: 10:52am On Jul 27, 2021 |
It's quite unnecessary trying to downplay your social status just because you want to find out if a woman would love you for having next to nothing. Even okada riders and shoemakers still have women who date/marry them. And honestly, with the exception of that 'appearance of sophistication', there's really not much difference between women of different social classes. If you feel the need to project a belittled image of yourself in order to attract a woman, then it's probably because you think you don't deserve that woman at her level. All a man needs is his good intuition and the spirit of discernment. Once you've got these in ample supply, you will always know exactly why a woman loves you... ALWAYS. 7 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 10:56am On Jul 27, 2021 |
truthsayer009:Thank you jare A book that changed my substance reasoning is the book of Ecclesiastes We just pick out what we want from the Bible,some of us don't even assimilate it,if the man "Solomon" the wisest man that ever lived spoke soo sparingly about substance and its importance,I wonder what normal mortals like us are feeling like when we've only seen an aspect of life and give our verdicts on life's dealings,smoke! I'd choose a good smoke over a bad one I'd pleasure in a good vanity over a bad one.. Because this is what makes life meaningful Life is worthless without its pleasures which only substance can acquire.. |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 11:00am On Jul 27, 2021 |
ford101:You know why I like life? Cause of its Oxymorons You have the ones with visions and the ones without it There is just much accomodations to opposites in life. So yes there are people okay with just the way they are.. sufficient or not. |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Bluekapon(m): 11:01am On Jul 27, 2021 |
You can not hide who you really are. Your charisma, confidence, social status etc are all as a result of where you come from and what you've achieved in life. No matter how much you pretend, the ladies will smell the real you and that's what's gonna attract them or repel them. Secondly, I doubt if there's any girl out there who doesn't want a better life. If a so called wife material is accepting a supposedly poor or average guy, it's solely because she doesn't have a better option at the moment and she may not want to lose the bird in hand. It's as simple as that. 1 Like |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by mariahAngel(f): 11:02am On Jul 27, 2021 |
crackhaus: It took you a while but...welcome. |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Potatochips(m): 11:06am On Jul 27, 2021 |
Lucrativress:I wonder oh. |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 11:08am On Jul 27, 2021 |
Anazp:How do I explain this to you? Okay I'd try my best So I love Lavender,I think she's pretty,I heard she adds succulence to whatever she's put in. It's about the gender thing right? Well no, I'm worthless if I have absolutely nothing and it's consistent,does this make you better? I understand your rebuff, hopefully you get my point now. Thank you |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Potatochips(m): 11:09am On Jul 27, 2021 |
oldienavie:Nah, it seems you didn't get the gist of my story. Her family was actually doing fine as well as herself, but she made up those stories to 'test' if I was a husband material or something like that... So the analogy is appropriate, I think. 2 Likes |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 11:13am On Jul 27, 2021 |
jimmychang:Ahn ahn but you saw where he went to first na I had to go his route too Oya enjoy my argument back oo 1 Like |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Potatochips(m): 11:13am On Jul 27, 2021 |
LagosNissan:Exactly. It's always better to exhibit your best attributes, I think. If the other person also measures up, then fine. The idea of camouflaging to attract true love or something like that does not make sense to me. It'll make you lose out on good opportunities/people. |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by cayorday89(m): 11:18am On Jul 27, 2021 |
Lucrativress: Funny enough both of you are right, cos which ever scenario you paint on issues like this, there are people on each side of the divide, interestingly, that is how life is. oldienavie: |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Kinsedes: 11:21am On Jul 27, 2021 |
I believe in making life decisions one must take into account own personality & history/experience of what line of thought & actions have worked for same over time. We tend to ignore d physical line of representation of our destinies. Life is like war & a wise man once said "in times of war, no ground/decision taken is certain...give desired result. In general, when searching for a life partner, an individual (especially a man) should relatively be humble, watch out for loyalty & other desired qualities in a potential spouse, try to show d will to succeed then see if appreciation will follow. It is important that a partner show Love for d personality of d spouse first before anything else, because that true love will most likely see them through thick & thins of marriage. But lowering education standard (especially below degree level) is not necessary whatsoever, just as portraying a wretched situation does not inspire. MODERATION IS KEY. |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 11:25am On Jul 27, 2021 |
cayorday89:I'm not a feminist, neither am I a gold digger,but I can be anything if logic implies I be that at a point in time. I just wish they get to understand life is ambiguous. 1 Like |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by mariahAngel(f): 11:34am On Jul 27, 2021 |
Honesty will lead you only to the right paths in life. |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Potatochips(m): 11:35am On Jul 27, 2021 |
hahn:My dear, she's on her own now, I believe. Everyone has moved on. From my investigations her real status was just that she was an actual nurse and her family was not really suffering as she portrayed. Nothing special. 2 Likes |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by solofresh(m): 11:37am On Jul 27, 2021 |
It is not right and this are the reasons. 1) Women don't love unconditionally Even your mum will always love you because she gave birth to you. Only a man can love unconditionally in the sense that a man can help a homeless lady and brush her up but you will hardly see a woman do that And if there is any woman who will do that then she must surely be in her 50's either desperate for marriage or looking for a sugar boy 2) People change. Even if you find the so called good wife,it doesn't change the fact that once she finds out your true identity, she will still misbehave � and want to get back at you for disguising as a poor guy. 3) Lastly you should marry someone of your class and not below or else be ready to be the breadwinner of your patner's family with your own combined Note that before you marry your partner, you should be able to study them well like a student ready to write a final year exam Gooday |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by cayorday89(m): 11:41am On Jul 27, 2021 |
Lucrativress:Yeah it is, and so many factors come into play when taking this decisions, and no two people have the same similar circumstances(at least, it could be hard to find someone very close with similar factors in play) on issues, so you can't take the decision of others to decide your own.. What if the man or the lady pass such test, won't he/she be pushed by friends and families in the long run when the truth is laid bare? |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Nobody: 11:43am On Jul 27, 2021 |
A lot of opinions Anyways do whatever that will work for you |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by cayorday89(m): 11:45am On Jul 27, 2021 |
wallarwallar:And na rich people house Imam dey go to do special prayer... |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Lucrativress(f): 11:53am On Jul 27, 2021 |
cayorday89:Abi o |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by pansophist(m): 12:06pm On Jul 27, 2021 |
jaxxy: I don't think one can fake class for long. If you'll know someone for a reasonably period of time, then its not possible to fake it that long. Hence I said, experience life with that person. That's what friendship and dating is all about. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by pansophist(m): 12:17pm On Jul 27, 2021 |
Anazp: Obviously employer reference was a mere example, not a replacement. Apple and orange scenario here. And yes, it is important to test spirit, or test body even, hence I said one should experience life with their potential spouse. I didn't rule it out. All I'm saying is that downplaying yourself is not a good long term strategy, and gave reasons why. Please read not to respond, but understand. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Nobody: 12:19pm On Jul 27, 2021 |
ford101: Wahala dey dis country oo hahaha 1 Like |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Nobody: 12:23pm On Jul 27, 2021 |
I've learnt alot from this thread. It's now obvious that I'm in the right track |
Re: Is It Right To Hide Or Belittle Yourself To Find "Wife Material? by Kondomatic(m): 12:27pm On Jul 27, 2021 |
I laugh... How about those that are poor and still married bad wives? Pretending is a waste of time if you ask me. A man looking for a good wife material should first of all ensure that he's a husband material. Marriage works when you're the right material and she's the right material. Once you see the lady that has the body you want, the next thing would be to learn about her from a distance and by distance I mean as a friend not lover. Women reveal their true self more to a friend than a lover. Learn about her character, family background etc and pay special attention to how she treats people. All these nah make e no just be like you no try because a woman will show her real self when she's dating you. Her real self pro when you marry her. Her real self pro max when something carry two of unah go court. |
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