EVENING DISCUSSION 101:
MY IN LAWS HAVE ARRANGED FOR MY WIFE TO GO TO THE USA WITHOUT MY KNOWLEDGE:
Dear Admin,
You can hide my identity for the sake of my family.
I am 43 and married to a 36-year-old with 2 kids 14 and 3 years old.
We had a normal couple disagreement and she took off to her sister in Ruiru.
When I went for them, because she had overstayed, I was told that she was in Tennessee, USA.
I couldn’t believe my ears because my wife was a housewife who even had a problem walking in Nairobi and locating places.
To the best of my knowledge, she didn’t even have a passport, let alone a visa.
She was a housewife and I work as a teacher in Kenol area.
Her family has accused me of cruelty against my wife, yet that is not true.
Now she has gone with the youngest daughter.
To confirm that she is in the USA, she actually called me and told me to jipanga because she has began her own life.
I am so distraught because someone else must have arranged for my wife, she had no capacity to plan and execute such travel arrangement.
How can I bring her back or do I report her to the embassy?
I hate her family forever.
#copied

The marriage has expired so let her be

You spoke of your wife as an incapable person : she cant walk or locate anywhere in Nairobi ( a 36 years old woman ) . She is a housewife, she could not have thought of going to the USA.. I guess you treated and looked at your wife as a second class being and thought it normal as an African man.
Guy, fear women. When you underestimate them you are planning your doom.
I know of a husband that maltreats his wife for over a decade and they day she left him he was shocked. She also travelled to a far away city and when he found out he called her and the most annoying part was he said he has never wronged her or done her any harm. A man that throws his wife out and beats her.
Guy tell yourself the truth, you messed up. Blame yourself not her family.
The USA embassy wont be able to help you . You reporting her she will seek asylum from you and tell them what will make them never allow you get a US visa.
Move on. She might change her mind and come back to you if you truly change but ....
Be a better man lesson learnt

She has already told you to "jipanga" what else do you want to hear?

You didn't fight to keep her when she was still with you, it's now that she has moved on with her life you want to go to the embassy and report. No o.. na airport make you go report. Report faya.

Just let her be.

I couldn’t believe my ears because my wife was a housewife who even had a problem walking in Nairobi and locating places

That is why you saw her finish ba? Of course he would say he was doing nothing because he probably wasn’t being physically abusive, but men like this would rub it in your face that you can’t leave them. When you leave, they’ll throw so much tantrums and start retracing their steps. Welcome to 2021.

Serves you right.

When she was been submissive, u thought she was a weakling.

For such a woman to take that step, it means she has exceeded her limit.

She isn't coming back, u got to move on.

I couldn’t believe my ears because my wife was a housewife who even had a problem walking in Nairobi and locating places

What a demeaning way to describe your wife, as in she's an illiterate that doesn't know her left from right abi? No wonder she "walked" all the way to Texas to completely shock you,

It is what is good for men like you, imagine saying you had normal misunderstanding and she left the house, what kind of of normal misunderstanding will make your wife leave to the extent of processing visa for her and your daughter? That means she stayed for many months, and you sat pretty waiting for her family to come with her to beg your sorry behind because you are who? When that didn't happen after the long wait, you suddenly remember you have a wife somewhere, so you shamelessly took yourself to where she was las las abi? They didn't shock you very well, after the visa shock, they should have used thugs to bundle you out of their house, eranu alailopolo oshi.

I am just happy for the woman, she don collect her 5 years US visa waka...the man go wait tire!

May we not attach ourselves with enemies of progress o

Halle000

I know how bad you feel right now about her betrayal and neglect.. Many people here will not believe your story and think you did her wrong. She has chosen america over you, the key is for your to choose something over her and move on.

Move on with your life

NOTE: Marriage is a contract and will expires when the time comes.

Pavore9:
I am just happy for the woman, she don collect her 5 years US visa waka...the man go wait tire!

Oga abeg jipanga.

blackboy:
You spoke of your wife as an incapable person : she cant walk or locate anywhere in Nairobi ( a 36 years old woman ) . She is a housewife, she could not have thought of going to the USA.. I guess you treated and looked at your wife as a second class being and thought it normal as an African man.
Guy, fear women. When you underestimate them you are planning your doom.
I know of a husband that maltreats his wife for over a decade and they day she left him he was shocked. She also travelled to a far away city and when he found out he called her and the most annoying part was he said he has never wronged her or done her any harm. A man that throws his wife out and beats her.
Guy tell yourself the truth, you messed up. Blame yourself not her family.
The USA embassy wont be able to help you . You reporting her she will seek asylum from you and tell them what will make them never allow you get a US visa.
Move on. She might change her mind and come back to you if you truly change but ....
Be a better man lesson learnt

Hmmmmmmmm.

No in-law (except a bad one) would accommodate their married daughter for months because of normal couple's fight without seeking a resolution.

No husband (except a bad one) would abandon a wife he loves and kids at her family house over a 'small' fight.

It is either the wife's family is bad or the husband is bad. Given the account of the husband, I would wager it is the later.

The husband thinks her very incapable amongst others and if he can be like this in a story he is narrating to justify himself, one wonders what he would sound like to her.

Since the wife has most likely moved on, there is the issue of custody of the kids. In reality, the husband can't care for a three year old so she would go with the mother. The 14 year old should be able to stay with the father if he wants to.

I am sha a very Nigerian girl when it comes to these issues. The wife has ran away with the kids; if the husband wants them or wants to see them, he should demand for that right. Or better still, just show up Naija style to the ex's house, send a sympathetic neighbor to call the kids and play with them to your heart's content.

Halle000:
EVENING DISCUSSION 101:
MY IN LAWS HAVE ARRANGED FOR MY WIFE TO GO TO THE USA WITHOUT MY KNOWLEDGE:
Dear Admin,
You can hide my identity for the sake of my family.
I am 43 and married to a 36-year-old with 2 kids 14 and 3 years old.
We had a normal couple disagreement and she took off to her sister in Ruiru.
When I went for them, because she had overstayed, I was told that she was in Tennessee, USA.
I couldn’t believe my ears because my wife was a housewife who even had a problem walking in Nairobi and locating places.
To the best of my knowledge, she didn’t even have a passport, let alone a visa.
She was a housewife and I work as a teacher in Kenol area.
Her family has accused me of cruelty against my wife, yet that is not true.
Now she has gone with the youngest daughter.
To confirm that she is in the USA, she actually called me and told me to jipanga because she has began her own life.
I am so distraught because someone else must have arranged for my wife, she had no capacity to plan and execute such travel arrangement.
How can I bring her back or do I report her to the embassy?
I hate her family forever.
#copied

1. She had no what now? Dude, the woman was probably superior to you intellectually and you chose to be ignorant of this for reasons known to you ....

2. Bring her back to what? Report her to the embassy for what?

3. You spoke to her on the phone, did she tell you the plan was her family's and not hers?

Op, your friend needs to wake up and smell the coffee. If he wants to see his kid, he needs to begin paying attention to reality and maybe, just maybe he might even get his wife back before she moves on to some other man who she believes will take better care of her.

I no its painful She has moved on do same why try and destroy her, if truelly you are that caring husband she will always remember you.