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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage (4075 Views)
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Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Splashme: 11:45pm On Sep 02, 2021 |
A Facebook user, Princess Blessing Ifunanyachukwu has narrated her ordeal in the shortlived marriage to her ex-husband Below is her story ... > > A lot of people Ask me who is this little Girl.... Well this little Girl is my child... Even when I tell people,they don’t believe me so sometimes I don’t bother telling.... I’ve decided to live my truth,this particular story is what I don’t like telling,this is the part of my life that I choose not to tell publicly but I think I have the courage to say it now,but before I start my story let me state that I didn’t have my child out of wedlock I got married at 17, (below are my wedding pictures) I did both Traditional and white wedding and the marriage didn’t last for complete 6months cos he wanted a slave and a punching bag as a wife, I ran away,each time I run away my parents took me back to him cos they thought I was lying Not Untill my mum witnessed everything herself he almost beat her black and blue,she brought me back home herself with the support of my dad,my dad personally returned the dowry that was paid Trouble started in the marriage when he breached the agreement,before i accepted the marriage he promised in the presence of my family and elders that he will put me in school,cos I already wrote jamb He met me like today... he paid my dowry in 2days time,because he was from the same village with us and my family knows his family... even tho I told my parents that I don’t know this guy and I don’t love him they said love will come and that it’s normal My mum married at 16 so because it worked for her she felt it will work for me too,within 3 weeks we were done with both white wedding and traditional wedding After the marriage,jamb result came out and I made it,I wanted to study law in unizik,he said over his dead body will I go to school,that I have to finish having kids before school which didn’t go down well with me,I felt used cos this was not the agreement... And I was already like a month pregnant Not like my dad wasn’t capable of sending me to school but they believe in early marriage and then suitors were coming for me every December each time we travel for Xmas because I’m too tall so one could think I’m an adult So much happened,so much that I thought of taking my own life while pregnant,my life was so messed up at that age,each time I call my friends it’s either they were in school already or planing to Sometimes I get kicked in my stomach sometimes I pass out cos of beating The hospital where I had my child in Abuja have my records Dara clinics Garki Abuja,at some point when I go to hospital I don’t want to go back home At some point the doctor had to call my mum adviced her to come pick me that I’m too small to go through all these...(that’s before she witnessed what she witnessed) I don’t regret having my child even tho I hated the father,I loved her right from when the doctor said I was pregnant of course she didn’t stop me from Going to school....cos I made sure I went back to school Neither was she a hindrance to my dreams... With her made it even more Easy because she was the motivation to chase money... I mean when you have someone who look up to you,you won’t have no choice than to chase the bag... I’ve always been there for her,I got admission 1year after I had her,thanks to my late mum who made it easy by taking care of her for me till she was 4,I took her back to Abuja while still in school... I never gave up,even tho the father was no where in her life till today...at some point I took him to court cos people were like “take him to court for child’s support” but our system is so bleeped up that it favors only the Rich.. He ended up frustrating my life with the help of his lawyer cos I had none, couldn’t afford one,even the lawyer that was helping me for free at some point got tired too... So we decided to settle out of court,I was not even upto 20 He said he was going to help raise the child on one condition,he stated.... “I will take care of her and rent you guys an apartment but I will be coming there every weekend and leave on Monday “ Which I blatantly refused cos it was just like still married to him.. I took it upon myself to Raise my child with him or without him,I said to myself “how can I be begging someone to take care of his child” I moved on....during the journey, most times things gets tough that I find it difficult to pay my school fee and that of my child and each time I call him he will tell me to come back that is his only condition before he can help... I didn’t call him for help again till after 7yrs which was last year which I made sure I put it in voice recording I told him “your daughter will enter secondary school this year and I’ve been the one paying her school fees since she was born this is the school I found for her and their entrance fee is 600k if we can split the bills you pay half I pay half(even tho I know he’s able to pay the fees with no stress) He said “he will think about it” (really? Thinking about it to pay your own child’s fees) After 2days he called back and gave exact same conditions... I just dropped the call because it’s obvious that after 11years dude is still very Heartless Through out this years he struggled to get someone like me,all to no avail he’s marrying the 4th if not the 5th wife now He went as far as going to my kindred to marry someone from the same kindred with me,that bears same name with me all to spite me,that particular marriage is gone and forgotten Each time I look at my daughter I look at all I’ve been through, she’s my compensation I didn’t gain anything in that marriage but I gained her,I left with nothing but I left with her... He said I will be frustrated and come back begging,it’s 12 years now I’m yet to be back I remember when he told me “you’re too Ambitious” all because I wanted to go to school If this incident has not affected me psychologically then I’m lying. Early Marriage is a NO NO!!!! Allow your Daughters to be able to make their own choice... A yes of a 17 year old is not the same as a Yes of a 25year old. 5 Likes 2 Shares
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Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Goldbw122(m): 11:59pm On Sep 02, 2021 |
Early marriage is good some people regret that decision right now. 1 Like |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by TarOrfeeek: 12:16am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Just like that another one passing through the conveyor belt of reckless love and infidelity. 1 Like |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Barbsamiin: 12:21am On Sep 03, 2021 |
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Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by WoundedLamb: 12:34am On Sep 03, 2021 |
OP, what makes her a slay queen? 8 Likes |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by OkuFaba(m): 12:39am On Sep 03, 2021 |
The fact you called her a SLAY QUEEN , is what I don't understand 12 Likes |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Snitch24(m): 12:41am On Sep 03, 2021 |
But wait hooo 600k for entrance fee How much come be school fees Me I don't want to believe this part of the story I wsh we can all give audience to the other gender part of the story 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by MVLOX(m): 3:51am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Abeg who get the summary |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by luizpippo(m): 4:09am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Got married at 17, OK. But what i don't get is "suitors are coming for me every December". You mean this suitors having been lining up at 16years and below? What would you be doing with a kid in the name of a suitor? 1 Like |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Tobiloba24072: 4:09am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Splashme: What happened to you,is the consequences of the laziness, laxity and greed of your father, and the greed of your ex. And sadly this greed is too engrained in igbo culture that it affects the ladies too. If it were a poor man that approached your family for marriage, would you yourself have agreed to marry him at that young age? Even till now, igbo girls are still open to be bought by men, every December they troop to the village for the bazaar of wealth show off and buying of future partners. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Lifestone(m): 5:04am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Tobiloba24072:Are Igbo? |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by DaudaTheSexyGuy(m): 5:22am On Sep 03, 2021 |
It's mostly insecure men that feel the need to encapsulate their women |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Tobiloba24072: 5:39am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Lifestone: Dated 2 igbo girls, their friends and sisters all have this innate greedy for a man that is wealthy and can show off and will will spoil them silly so they can show off. It's part of the igbo culture and they even have a name for it, but I have forgotten the name. 3 Likes |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by mainkendo: 5:47am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Early marriage has its pros and cons. Stop contacting the man . There can't be two Masters in one house. 2 Likes |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by TheChameleon: 5:48am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Chestbeaters and wife battery na 5 & 6. If it's a fellow man, he would have ran away in his wife's skirts. Anyways... this babe ran to find Afonja guys to service her. ![]() 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by TheChameleon: 5:48am On Sep 03, 2021 |
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Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Imustnottalk: 7:06am On Sep 03, 2021 |
D |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Gadafii: 7:10am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Thank God she survived and doing well for her self, not a lot of girls can survive this type of Early abuse 1 Like |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Sonnobax15(m): 7:30am On Sep 03, 2021 |
![]() She isn't far from the truth....... That's one reason why I offer my free pity to young niggas and young bannies who think they can imitate Ned Nwoko and Regina Daniels and go Scot free without having a taste of "REGRET" along the line....I just dey pity such people for free of charge(especially the young bannies who think they can cage a man by hooking a pregnancy down his throat).......Simply because we keep seeing Regina flaunting her happiness on social media doesn't mean she's inwardly happy ![]() ![]() That's how my ex banny tried to lure me into marrying her when I was 18 years old.....No be say I don even get my own accomodation that time self,No solid source of income self, can't even feed myself talk more of feeding an extra mouth ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Nonexisting1: 7:47am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Women will always be too quick to tell what their husband did and leave out what they did. Isn't that hypocrisy? A man that was dancing on his wedding day and spending money like a politician which sometimes was borrowed from friends can not suddenly wake up one day and forget the road to the gym where there is a punching bag and starts punching his wife's face. Since you want to discuss your marital problems in the public, do so without leaving out any detail because the fools in the social media have not outnumbered the wise. Some of us still dey read with our common sense intact. 1 Like |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Lifestone(m): 7:48am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Tobiloba24072:Oh, talking from experience |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Glamouzpeter(f): 7:58am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Snitch24:It should be one of this Bristish secondary school It is basically for the high class Once a child finished from there, automatic admission to any university outside the country depending on Memorandum of agreement 2 Likes |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Glamouzpeter(f): 8:00am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Am glad she never give up |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by FreeSpirited: 8:06am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Schooling is the reason early marriage don't work again. It used to work all over the world in those days. In those days, year of consent was between 11 and 15 all over the world, because every culture accepts that once a gal starts menstruating, she's almost ready if not ready to start receiving ccock...No culture is exempted. That was why, in Africa , Europe, America, Arab, everywhere, ladies were married off within 12 and 16...few manage to get to 18 before being married off. . There was nothing like dating as we have it today where it's a licence to fvvck up and down with no sense of responsibility. . And dating became popularised with society embracing formal schooling system as against informal schooling system and apprenticeship Which was in place. Since school take longer time befor completion, the raging sex drives in young adult has to be quenched by so called dating and fvvcking around instead of proper marriage...that was the beginning of sexual impropriety and irresponsibility for both young men and ladies. It is the reason women now grow to 19, 20, 25, and 30 before being married, and many get so intoxicated with attention and diiicks and fvcking around and making money through prostitution that they miss their partner..and become lonely without "husband".... . .I think the Muslim world in general still value those days of marrying girls off as being the ideal... it's close to ideal...but since education of gals is now seen as paramount than their marriage, the society now cringes young girl marriage..come even call it child marriage( something that was normal almost every where)...but in uneducated places, the culture continues. . .It's no big deal ..it's how we started...and many culture still practise it.... |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by westlius(m): 8:46am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Hmm wahala no dey finish |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Panda7: 9:03am On Sep 03, 2021 |
people should take their r/ship issues off social media no one cares. when the rest of the world are advancing in education and innovation Africans are always coming up with their issues. a 17yr gal that hasn't completed a career course is hell bent on marriage |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by MANDIPUTIN: 10:49am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Tobiloba24072: Very true. The way majority of Igbos worship money & show off ![]() ![]() They think nothing else matters when you have the money and plenty of it. 2 Likes |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by oyatz(m): 11:12am On Sep 03, 2021 |
Nonexisting1: Women like emotional blackmail. I was trying to talk to my adopted sister on saving her relationship. She sobbing ,attracting undue sympathy and telling me how her BF jilted her. Later on, after getting her confidence, I offered to appeal to the guy who incidentally happened to be a colleague but I probed further to asked her what she did that made him cut off the relationship. She said she was flirting with one young man (but they haven't had sex) and somehow her BF got to know! She started begging the BF to forgive her but she claimed he rather embarrassed her by going to her family to report the matter. |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by PARADIZEPRIEST: 11:19am On Sep 03, 2021 |
WHAT FCCKIN ADVISE? IF U MARRY EARLY YOU BORN EARLY AND AVERT ALL SHANANIGANS OF INFERTILITY ![]() |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by Imustnottalk: 11:48am On Sep 03, 2021 |
G |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by donb06: 1:15pm On Sep 03, 2021 |
Tobiloba24072: Don't care where u come from but one thing I must tell u is ure a big fool..... What makes u think ur father is more hardworking that the father of this lady. And please if any Igbo lady has broken ur heart... resolve the issue with her and heal very fast. Do u know the biggest show off is: serving a master as an apprentice and spending over 150k in FREEDOM when you haven't bought any tool to start work... After freedom you start begging money to buy tools. Which show off big pass that one..... No let me start oo 1 Like |
Re: Slay Queen Who Was Married Off At 17 Advises Against Early Marriage by donb06: 1:21pm On Sep 03, 2021 |
Tobiloba24072:Ehya this two Igbo girls do u strong thing.... There are millions of igbo girls married to mid and even low class guys enjoying their marriage.... May be the demon in you is attracting ur likes... Don't allow ur demon to tarnish the Igbo image. And ur demon won't also stop me from loving my Damilola ![]() GRACIAS 1 Like |
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