extol1:

those kind of men don't bother even if they throw his properties away. he want to be seen as baba olowo on the street

BlizEmmy:
Exactly....... As if u knew him

Meek127:
haha ,that a serious matter o.
best thing is to involve family

extol1:

this is what has happened that I have seen, even to the family members, he will prove to be stubborn and might accused the wife of involving third party into their affair all because she gave him money. like I said counseling might not work but PRAYER will definitely do

ststyreal:
Madam, I'm sorry to say this to you, you are not wise and smart at the same time.
Award winning wife of the century!!!!, I am seriously clapping for you! standing ovation for you..... smhhhh. Your mother's money, not even your own and you gave him everything.... don't you know that it is wisdom a woman uses in staying in husband's house, smhhhhhhh..... He might even be thinking the money is yours..... Just beg him to refund you whatever that is left. Make him realise you need to return the money back to your mother. Next time, you will study your husband very well and not do 'Ruth Abo Ko Ku'....

radiance26:
Tell him your mom needs her money,just find a means of collecting the balance.Then withdraw a few responsibility with wisdom.He may see reasons to be serious.

extol1:

in as much we are blaming the woman, she really meant well for the family, it is so unfortunate. I am pity the woman because her type is rare

extol1:

in as much we are blaming the woman, she really meant well for the family, it is so unfortunate. I am pity the woman because her type is rare

BlizEmmy:
[color=#000099][/color] Good evening all, this is my first time posting on this platform. Though have been a regular reader. Please I'm lost and am in need of honest and truthful comments pls.
Have been married for the past 5year now. All through my years of marriage, have been opened to my husband in everything even down to how much I was paid and even when I spend 1naira out of d money, that's hw open and plain have been to my husband, but I noticed my husband likes keeping secrets, especially when it comes to income. It got so bad to the extent that my husband went and open a new bank account that I wasn't aware off, Just because he knows that I dnt go through his phone.
On one faithful day, we were at the seating room when am alert message pops up on his phone then I saw it, at first he denied it but when he saw that the liers weren't working he had to come clean because his full name was on the new fidelity Bank alert.
That aside, fast forward to this year, after the COVID my husband lost his Job, so all the weight of the house fell on me, as I was the sole provider. of which I was doing gracely to the point that not even my family members were aware that my husband had lost his job. I even went out of my way to make sure he changes all his old shoes down to sowing new natives and plain wears since he said he wants to go into Car business and property. I did all these without complaining, even when he said he wants to be selling male shoes, I still supported him with that which he later neglected barely two months into it. I was till joining my faith with him in prayers and not giving up.
But what really got me feed up now was that just last month I called my husband And told him that since out rent is due in three months time and since my mom's money that she kept with me after selling her house is in my bank account, that why not we invest it in his car business, let him use it to buy a very neat car that we can quickly sell and make our profits so we can save for our house rent as I have just finish paying my shop rent so what I have is only for my business, since my profits is for the up keep of the house, coupled with the facts that things are way too expensive so I needed the extra help. After we had the discussion, I went early to the bank to transfer all the cash in my possession to my husband company account. Barely after two days I did the transfer my husband started spending the cash, all in a bit to make his formal colleagues jealous that is his doing well in his new property business not caring for the facts that we re about to lose our home in 3months times, frm the bank statement I saw he even transferred some money to his own private account to spend.
Help I dnt knw what to do as I was so pissed i had to leave the house so as to not cause a seen since I have noisey neighbours. Could u believe my husband didn't bother to call to even knw where I was, until I came back home till now we ain't talking. Pls all I need now is serious advise on what to do as I'm very confused right now. Thank you

ahnie:
You had to transfer the money into your husband account even after knowing too well that he's not only a spendthrift but also a chronic sociopath.


She married a sociopath who thinks he need to maintain a certain outlook that he can't keep.












SMH......!

BlizEmmy:
[color=#000099][/color] Good evening all, this is my first time posting on this platform. Though have been a regular reader. Please I'm lost and am in need of honest and truthful comments pls.
Have been married for the past 5year now. All through my years of marriage, have been opened to my husband in everything even down to how much I was paid and even when I spend 1naira out of d money, that's hw open and plain have been to my husband, but I noticed my husband likes keeping secrets, especially when it comes to income. It got so bad to the extent that my husband went and open a new bank account that I wasn't aware off, Just because he knows that I dnt go through his phone.
On one faithful day, we were at the seating room when am alert message pops up on his phone then I saw it, at first he denied it but when he saw that the liers weren't working he had to come clean because his full name was on the new fidelity Bank alert.
That aside, fast forward to this year, after the COVID my husband lost his Job, so all the weight of the house fell on me, as I was the sole provider. of which I was doing gracely to the point that not even my family members were aware that my husband had lost his job. I even went out of my way to make sure he changes all his old shoes down to sowing new natives and plain wears since he said he wants to go into Car business and property. I did all these without complaining, even when he said he wants to be selling male shoes, I still supported him with that which he later neglected barely two months into it. I was till joining my faith with him in prayers and not giving up.
But what really got me feed up now was that just last month I called my husband And told him that since out rent is due in three months time and since my mom's money that she kept with me after selling her house is in my bank account, that why not we invest it in his car business, let him use it to buy a very neat car that we can quickly sell and make our profits so we can save for our house rent as I have just finish paying my shop rent so what I have is only for my business, since my profits is for the up keep of the house, coupled with the facts that things are way too expensive so I needed the extra help. After we had the discussion, I went early to the bank to transfer all the cash in my possession to my husband company account. Barely after two days I did the transfer my husband started spending the cash, all in a bit to make his formal colleagues jealous that is his doing well in his new property business not caring for the facts that we re about to lose our home in 3months times, frm the bank statement I saw he even transferred some money to his own private account to spend.
Help I dnt knw what to do as I was so pissed i had to leave the house so as to not cause a seen since I have noisey neighbours. Could u believe my husband didn't bother to call to even knw where I was, until I came back home till now we ain't talking. Pls all I need now is serious advise on what to do as I'm very confused right now. Thank you

BlizEmmy:
I was trying to be supportive and not making him feel less a man after losing his job and I was also trying to encourage him by creating that opportunity for him to make his own quarter but what do I knw, its well

BlizEmmy:
Is my mom's hard earned money she saved with me after selling her house, pending when she is able to get another better house. I have not even eaten 1 pin frm that money. That's what this man is spending

BlizEmmy:
[color=#000099][/color] Good evening all, this is my first time posting on this platform. Though have been a regular reader. Please I'm lost and am in need of honest and truthful comments pls.
Have been married for the past 5year now. All through my years of marriage, have been opened to my husband in everything even down to how much I was paid and even when I spend 1naira out of d money, that's hw open and plain have been to my husband, but I noticed my husband likes keeping secrets, especially when it comes to income. It got so bad to the extent that my husband went and open a new bank account that I wasn't aware off, Just because he knows that I dnt go through his phone.
On one faithful day, we were at the seating room when am alert message pops up on his phone then I saw it, at first he denied it but when he saw that the liers weren't working he had to come clean because his full name was on the new fidelity Bank alert.
That aside, fast forward to this year, after the COVID my husband lost his Job, so all the weight of the house fell on me, as I was the sole provider. of which I was doing gracely to the point that not even my family members were aware that my husband had lost his job. I even went out of my way to make sure he changes all his old shoes down to sowing new natives and plain wears since he said he wants to go into Car business and property. I did all these without complaining, even when he said he wants to be selling male shoes, I still supported him with that which he later neglected barely two months into it. I was till joining my faith with him in prayers and not giving up.
But what really got me feed up now was that just last month I called my husband And told him that since out rent is due in three months time and since my mom's money that she kept with me after selling her house is in my bank account, that why not we invest it in his car business, let him use it to buy a very neat car that we can quickly sell and make our profits so we can save for our house rent as I have just finish paying my shop rent so what I have is only for my business, since my profits is for the up keep of the house, coupled with the facts that things are way too expensive so I needed the extra help. After we had the discussion, I went early to the bank to transfer all the cash in my possession to my husband company account. Barely after two days I did the transfer my husband started spending the cash, all in a bit to make his formal colleagues jealous that is his doing well in his new property business not caring for the facts that we re about to lose our home in 3months times, frm the bank statement I saw he even transferred some money to his own private account to spend.
Help I dnt knw what to do as I was so pissed i had to leave the house so as to not cause a seen since I have noisey neighbours. Could u believe my husband didn't bother to call to even knw where I was, until I came back home till now we ain't talking. Pls all I need now is serious advise on what to do as I'm very confused right now. Thank you

Kabongo1:
Does Fidelity send SMS alerts that carries customer name?

nnamdiosu:


Ma,trust me
You didn't do anything wrong. You are the kind of women that are rare to find. The problem is, you married a type of husband that is very easy to find.

Don't listen to those trying to make you look stupid. IF THEY HAVE EVER WITNESS TRUE HONESTY AND SINCERITY IN MARRIAGE, THEY WOULD HAVE KNOWN ITS THE NORM .
BUT SADLY, PEOPLE FROM DYSFUNCTIONAL HOMES WONT UNDERSTAND.

it's like the home whereby each partner has the pin to each other's atm. Anyone from a home there is distrust, or stealing would scream. But its not their fault. it's because they haven't experienced the bliss of transparency in marriage or life.

Imagine you had married.someone with the same honesty, sincerity and commitment to family, you would have really really enjoyed this marriage. Anyways, solutions.

NO ONE IS PERFECT, JUST FORGIVE HIS EXCESSES AND LOOK FOR SOLUTIONS TOGETHER

1. In as much as you have a sincere and good heart, it's clear your husband doesn't. (Let's call a spade a spade ) therefore operating in the atmosphere of sincerity totally might not be too advisable.

In as much as I'm an advocate of total transparency, there are some rare and drastic cases that one must use wisdom.
We, when the landlord wants to kick you guys out of the house, no one will know or.say, you tried, it was your husband that messed up.
They will just say,
Them no fit pay, them.dey stay for.house.way big pass them


2. You'll have to be careful. It's clear that he isn't responsible. That's the gospel truth. A responsible man would never ever do.anythimg to jeopardize the safety or wellness of his family. He even went a firthur step of embelezzing based on pride and ego. That's a very dangerous combo.

IM NOT HERE TO CASTIGATE HIM. NO. ONLY TRYIMG TO OPEN YOUR EYES TO THE TRUTH.

You have to talk to him. Point out this issues and show him why it can be detrimental to the safety of the family, now or in the nearest future.

Find out if he wants to start a biz and look in both together if it will be favourable. Then see if you can support him again.
.

therefore since.you are now the bread winner, it will be tough but.you just have to take some decisions that will be hard to.
You might now have to.start doing the financial planning for the family small by small till he comes back to a matured self.

You might have to also save for.importsnt bills to.ensure the safety of the family.

You also have to pray seriously for him.

That's the little i have to advise. May God see you through. Amen

Vision101:
Madam you are an extremely good woman. You truly love your husband. Unfortunately you are not helping his nature. He is a proud, notice me and show off person. These things come first to him than the image of his family and the peace of his children.

When you have this type of person, you should play your part to save your children and the image of your family but you should never have exposed your finances to him. He feels that you can never allow shame to come to the family. So he cares less about planning.

Big mistake....big mistake. You should never have given him your mum's money. I don't want to say things that I suspect as they will get you very angry.

Move very fast. Get a trusted church leader, relation or friend that he respects and insist on retrieving your mum's money. You can invest it in your business and manage and pay rent from their. Your husband can't do well in business. Don't give him any one naira again.

From now on be discrete about your finances. I feel sad as a man. God will help you because of your good heart.

sisisioge:

It is so unfortunate that no one can forsee the future hence we would have do better. He gave him that money so he can support his family knowing fully well that the money belongs to my mom, I thought he will be responsible with it and not misuse it. But what can I say no one can forsee the future sir cos if I had know I won't have given him the money
You should never use someone else's money to test the waters! How dare you! Just gather your mother's money back and return it. Na you marry agbako.