Favfables1:
OP...
Is it Everytime you feel like going to work?? I'm guessing, no,but yet you still go to work right?? Why?? Because the consequences of not doing so, out weighs the pleasure that comes with the"day off"...

I won't say anymore...

Aswearugaaad

Wisdom!

Tonnyray:
A woman who after 2 kids still has her husband seriously sexually interested in her should consider herself fortunate in this day and age.

Moods and interests cuts both ways. Not in the mood or not interested or using sex as a weapon also cuts both ways - I know; because I am not a Hot goat that is controlled by his dick.

The biggest problem is what happens afterwards if the situation gets out of hand. There will be zero intimacy and no one will want to initiate sex...

Men also have sex when they don't want - just to satisfy their wives or boost the wife's confidence even though she is typically overweight and not adventurous in bed. Some don't even know how to really turn a man on - they think it is just about boobs and ass.

* Men need to learn to control their libidos!

The answer is nope. She dosen't owe in the sense of being indebted.
She may be tired and not in the mood sometimes.

This epistle bcoz of what.
Nothing in this write up.
Once u see any man while growing up and if u see he is attracted to you
Just tell him clearly that you don't owe him sex,
Don't sugar-coat it.
Say it that you cannot give him sex everytime but only when you are in the mood
That's the best way to know.

Don't gimme sex but don't be surprised if another lady does the job, if you like make plenty writeup

Damn right d do

Klass99:


I am curious Mufasa, have you ever enjoyed sex with a reluctant and unwilling partner? Answer truthfully o!

@ Tobechi, you made valid points but so did Tickles001.

My personal ideology of marriage has always been two adults taking good care of each other. And that means in every way possible - sexually, financially, emotionally, physically and otherwise.

In marriage, I believe our bodies belong to each other, it's about giving and receiving care, being there for the other person even when you don't feel like it, but they need you.

We owe each other sex, as well as respect, intimacy and more.....If I am tired and not in the mood, I will simply tell my man, I'm tired so bear with me if I don't bring my A Game to this show or I am not an active and enthusiastic participant tonight.

I won't say no or deny him the cookie, because when he flips that script on me I am sure I won't like it or find it funny.

You are a very wise woman indeed.

1 Corinthians 7:3-5

3.The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.
4.The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife.
5.Do not deprive each other, except by mutual consent and for a time, so you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again, so that Satan will not tempt you through your lack of self-control.

Whoever is yet to accept the above statement has no business being in the marriage union. Depriving the other party access to his/he body in conjugal right is one of several reasons a divorce petition is granted favor in courts.

@ tobechi20, I hope this answers the question

N.B consideration and understanding also matters

webizone:


That explains why it's well known that, " Men love women for them, but women love what the man can do for them"

You know what's up bruh

Do men owe their wife money....
What if he his not in the mood to give you money...cus his giving libido is low...
How did we get here...if its oyinbo that wrote the script i thing they need to do women sextual mood schedule.
If u denied sex...men...loit
Record d time she wasnt in the mood...
That pussy...that mood...that woman...wetin d pussy go see she go see.
Am certain dis type of women will treat dia men right and come here talking the non sense

Most of these ladies are very selfish.
We know it all lies in the war of gender supremacy and we know the agenda.
The feminist geng!
The unmarried, unhappy females will always want to ruin happy families.
I pity the ladies who take them serious on here.
Does a Man owe his wife sex when she want it even when the man is so stressed and tired?
Most ladies have their libido high when ovulating... If he refuses, it becomes a crime and a reason most of them will support their fellow to cheat.

Does any man owe any wife money or care? Does a man need to be unselfish by ensuring he cares for the wife and the children before even buying a pair of shoe for himself in a year?.
The western way of life which has succeeded in bringing out a high divorce rate is creeping into African culture and is finding a settled place in our ladies.. Encouraging you to be overly selfish even in marriage. The world revolve around you being a female or because you have a vagina.
To those ones who want a settled, happy, lovely home unlike those including the OP who likely are from broken homes;try to know what works for your home and know that both parties must be ready to make sacrifices to keep the home.

DriverX:
This is where you'll find Nigerians... Typing novels about sex sex sex. Why won't your population skyrocket, simultaneously along with poverty? Keep fucking_.... Una eye go soon clear.

Like you ain't a product of fucking.. People eat,drink,sleep,walk ,run and Bleep

bukatyne:


Let me flip the question:

Do husbands 'owe' their wives sex in marriage?

I believe it depends on the type of marriage contracted:

In Christianity, marriage is for the following (in no particular order):
1. Companionship
2. Prevent adultery aka access to godly sex
3. Raise godly children

To ensure number two is achieved, plenty Bible verses talk about husbands and wives sexually satisfying themselves. The key would be 1 Cor 7: 2 - 5:


So yes, husbands and wives owe themselves sex, companionship, support etc.

You don't even need all these analysis, or tobechi20 unnecessary (to me) title. If you feel you don't owe each other sex, then you shouldn't be in the marriage in the first place...

dammyllare:
Most of these ladies are very selfish.
We know it all lies in the war of gender supremacy and we know the agenda.
The feminist geng!
The unmarried, unhappy females will always want to ruin happy families.
I pity the ladies who take them serious on here.
Does a Man owe his wife sex when she want it even when the man is so stressed and tired?
Most ladies have their libido high when ovulating... If he refuses, it becomes a crime and a reason most of them will support their fellow to cheat.

Does any man owe any wife money or care? Does a man need to be unselfish by ensuring he cares for the wife and the children before even buying a pair of shoe for himself in a year?.
The western way of life which has succeeded in bringing out a high divorce rate is creeping into African culture and is finding a settled place in our ladies.. Encouraging you to be overly selfish even in marriage. The world revolve around you being a female or because you have a vagina.
To those ones who want a settled, happy, lovely home unlike those including the OP who likely are from broken homes;try to know what works for your home and know that both parties must be ready to make sacrifices to keep the home.

Apt !!!

The OP has written a very immature, shallow and foolish write-up

tobechi20:
We turn a blind eye when husbands pressure their wives for sex, because how could a husband demanding sex from his wife possibly be harassment? His sex drive is considered natural. His pleasure a given.

It’s not harassment when it’s your husband, right? Isn’t a sexually demanding husband normal? Aren’t they just Hot husbands? Don’t they all do it?

This type of erroneous thinking lends itself to less obvious assaults, manipulation, and even in some cases, violence.

But because it can be done in a marriage, it’s even deemed normal and acceptable.

Mismatched libidos among couples can be frustrating. I get it. But it’s also very normal and prevalent. So many factors can contribute to sex drive — external stressors in one’s environment, diet, sleep, medical issues, etc.

Postpartum women are given the green light to bone at six weeks after birthing a baby. Never mind the fact that pregnancy literally tears a woman’s body from limb to limb, molecule by molecule for nine solid months. Bah! You’re fine. Get back on the horse!

Never mind that a new mother may have had full abdominal surgery, in the form of a C-section. That doesn’t take immense healing or anything. Never mind episiotomies. Seriously? Are you looking for a pity party, postpartum women? We all know it’s super easy to heal when your vagina is ripped from front to back. If you don’t want sex after vaginal stitches, what’s wrong with you, women? 

Forget those postpartum haywire female hormones and sleep deprivation after giving birth. Those are just theories; that shit ain’t real!

Sarcasm aside, when a woman is out of the postpartum stage, her menstrual cycle returns. A period comes with its own set of hormone fluctuations that vary and change all month long.

If we all know a woman’s sex drive is largely impacted by biological elements beyond her control, why aren’t men more understanding? Why isn’t society more understanding?

Why are a man’s sexual needs the ones always tended to? What about what the women need? The mothers? What about the support they need to feel sexy?

Women are not only impacted by biology, but they are also sexually influenced by social and cultural factors in their environment. For example, married mothers tend to work the majority of the “second shift.” Second shift is the domestic work done at your shared home, after working your paid job all day.

Women are disproportionately scrubbing toilets. And we’re exhausted. Married moms are disproportionately handling matters related to childrearing. They are touched-out. How can a mom feel Hot when she’s doing most of the work? When she’s the one tending to the kids?

Instead of telling married mothers that they should do it anyway, even if they’re not in the mood, we should encourage men to do something that would contribute to a woman’s arousal.

For starters, men should respect a woman’s rejection. They should respect her body and her choices. They should respect consent. Consent still needs to be considered, even in a marriage.

A man’s actions, or inactions, in the household affect a woman’s arousal environment. We should expect married dads to pick up more of a woman’s second-shift duties. That means helping equally with parenting and domestic tasks.

From the outside, people who berate and belittle women for not satisfying the sexual needs of their husbands are bullies. They are unsupportive. Their unfair, and frankly, deeply flawed marital criticism is rooted in years of oppression against women.

No one, I repeat, no one should think it’s okay for a woman to have sex against her will. Not even with a spouse.

Okay you have made your point, but you are very onesided in your article. So a man does not have needs. Well if you fail to satisfy them don't be surprised if he gets a child from another willing woman. It is wrong of you to think that men oppress women by asking for sex, he does this to satisfy is biological needs. When a woman chooses to disssatisfy her man by trying to be celibate for years well men are not built that way. You can continue to be self centred or choose to satisfy your man so he does not go to a baby mama because it is fallacy for you to think a married man will not have sex for months because you said you are not in the mood. FYI islamically it is a sin.

Abeg no give each other sex jare



Life does not revolve around sex



In fact, if it does ……. Variety is the spice of life

I do not subscribe to this. As a married man,I know that a lot of sensitive,married men like myself allow our women to heal from the pain and stress of childbirth before we make sexual advances towards them. In fact,we give them about 5/6months to heal before we seduce them. Perhaps a year.
If however you feel this way,how come women complain that their husbands bleep outside because they have just given birth to a baby?
Is it really true that women don't respond to sexual advances immediately after child-birth?
Truly, child-birth is stressful and painful, but it is common knowledge that women forget what they went through at child-birth few weeks after bearing a child. Consequently, some of them want sex weeks after child-birth because their body is wet and ready for hot sex. It is the smell of breast-milk that put off many from doing the needful.
Unless a woman delivers through Ceasarean Section or her vagina was cut due to the size of the baby,she is ready for sex 4 weeks after child-birth
Na from the back i dey do am.

Tickles001:
If everyone starts to do things only when they're in the mood or only when it's owed. How do you think the world would be like.

What do you think will play out in the family if the man wakes up one morning and decides he's not funding the house for a whole month because he doesn't feel like, or not in the mood. Or decides that he needs to quit his job and get a break because he's depressed and stressed out.

He's been doing like 3 side hustles, plus his main job. Things he entirely doesn't feel like doing. He needs a break, but he's not taking it.

If a woman naturally turns cold. A reasonable man would understand. But most times women just use it to show defiance.
The same woman that has 3kids and now cold, is the same woman that will go and be feeling kinky with a colleague in the office. Even when the said colleague is not doing anything to attract her.

Have sex with your partner is one of the simple things someone would do if there's still a tiny bit of attraction left in the union.

Men do a lot of things that is actually against their will. They go through biological changes too. All those stuffs you wrote up there has a masculine version of it. But if everyone starts making a long case out of simple things just like you did. Then nothing will ever work out and happiness will elude everyone at the end.

I wonder how people think like this sef. Simple something

A married woman with 2kids from this nairaland once told me that her husband is not giving her enough sex. That she wants it more now, than when she was without child. And she is a busy woman.
How come she's not cold?

Sometimes I just wonder why God place this hunger for sex on us and not make it optional.

budaatum:


So, in your own opinion, no woman who is respected by her man can have a successful marriage?

I'll tell you what. You will live long. Come back in 10 years time and tell me how successful your marriage is to a woman you do not respect.

ure just laying emphasis on respect without telling us what the repect means in this context
so if she says no,then it means a no.without u trying to giveme a good reason or try to make it up to me.i see better and more curvy ladies who crave my attention but i quickly rush home with intention that instead of me fornicating, would rather sleep with my wife,an then she tells me emphatically NO,without any valid reason or trying to make it up to me.a woman is going through a lot of changes doesnt leave out the man too.th very thought that we have to sleep with just one woman even when her body changes to how it once was is enough psychological issue on its own.ur opinion is not a good one for marriage abeg.

Tickles001:
If everyone starts to do things only when they're in the mood or only when it's owed. How do you think the world would be like.

What do you think will play out in the family if the man wakes up one morning and decides he's not funding the house for a whole month because he doesn't feel like, or not in the mood. Or decides that he needs to quit his job and get a break because he's depressed and stressed out.
He's been doing like 3 side hustles, plus his main job. Things he entirely doesn't feel like doing. He needs a break, but he's not taking it.

If a woman naturally turns cold. A reasonable man would understand. But most times women just use it to show defiance.
The same woman that has 3kids and now cold, is the same woman that will go and be feeling kinky with a colleague in the office. Even when the said colleague is not doing anything to attract her.

Have sex with your partner is one of the simple things someone would do if there's still a tiny bit of attraction left in the union.

Men do a lot of things that is actually against their will. They go through biological changes too. All those stuffs you wrote up there has a masculine version of it. But if everyone starts making a long case out of simple things just like you did. Then nothing will ever work out and happiness will elude everyone at the end.

I wonder how people think like this sef. Simple something

A married woman with 2kids from this nairaland once told me that her husband is not giving her enough sex. That she wants it more now, than when she was without child. And she is a busy woman.
How come she's not cold?

Thank you.

bukatyne:


Let me flip the question:

Do husbands 'owe' their wives sex in marriage?

I believe it depends on the type of marriage contracted:

In Christianity, marriage is for the following (in no particular order):
1. Companionship
2. Prevent adultery aka access to godly sex
3. Raise godly children

To ensure number two is achieved, plenty Bible verses talk about husbands and wives sexually satisfying themselves. The key would be 1 Cor 7: 2 - 5:


So yes, husbands and wives owe themselves sex, companionship, support etc.

Full stop.. .

That person writing that novel, will still claim to be Christian... with twisting of scriptures to suit their skewed opinion.

theForth:


God knows I am not violent, I hate violence with every fibre in me but if my wife should deny me sex, even once, I can never ask her again and I shall have every reason to play outside.

I don't really care if the marriage goes downhill from there, me I no send anybody. I just thank God for the personality he gave me sha.

fellow man of culture

You make it sound like not having sex will kill you, like it's oxygen you are being deprived of, but more important is if I need to be "telling us what the repect (sic) means in this context", then you are hardly mature enough to have a girlfriend not to talk of a wife.

Get a dictionary and look up 'respect' there please. Not only should you respect your wife, more important is that you respect yourself.

gbemishile:

ure just laying emphasis on respect without telling us what the repect means in this context
so if she says no,then it means a no.without u trying to giveme a good reason or try to make it up to me.i see better and more curvy ladies who crave my attention but i quickly rush home with intention that instead of me fornicating, would rather sleep with my wife,an then she tells me emphatically NO,without any valid reason or trying to make it up to me.a woman is going through a lot of changes doesnt leave out the man too.th very thought that we have to sleep with just one woman even when her body changes to how it once was is enough psychological issue on its own.ur opinion is not a good one for marriage abeg.

budaatum:
You make it sound like not having sex will kill you, like it's oxygen you are being deprived of, but more important is if I need to be "telling us what the repect (sic) means in this context", then you are hardly mature enough to have a girlfriend not to talk of a wife.

Get a dictionary and look up 'respect' there please. Not only should you respect your wife, more important is that you respect yourself.

if ur respect means depriving ur husband his conjugal rights,the am sincerely sorry for you in ur marriage,thats if ure married

.

Klass99:


Yes to your good wish! It will be awesome to meet a partner who shares the same sentiments.



I am glad you think so.



Your thoughts are appreciated.



Your post was easy to understand.



Thank you, may He bless and keep you too.



Gracias.

Some peeps get palpitations when they see my username.

Even if I say 'the Sky is blue', they will still have issues and link it to endorsing slavery for women.

Counsellor Klass!

.

gbemishile:

if ur respect means depriving ur husband his conjugal rights,the am sincerely sorry for you in ur marriage,thats if ure married

You don't have "conjugal rights"! You married a human being and not some sex doll you own, and if for whatever reason she's not in the mood you should respect that. It would make your sex more interesting and enjoyable if you wait till she is in the mood, though you do sound like you'd just rape her or fuq a log of wood.

budaatum:


You don't have "conjugal rights"! You married a human being and not some sex doll you own, and if for whatever reason she's not in the mood you should respect that. It would make your sex more interesting and enjoyable if you wait till she is in the mood, though you do sound like you'd just rape her or fuq a log of wood.

no conjugal rights in marriage?
So whats the whole essence of the rites performed on the wedding day?
What makes her different from the other single women out there?
I performed all the marriage rites on u cus u and i both agreed to grow- emotionally,physically,sexually and all that within the confines of a lawful marriage.after all these, now feel u can just tell me ure not willing to perform those rites or u feel u can decide when to perform ur rites without any explanation or compromise.
wont rape her.she wouldnt be the only one to ease me off my stress then.
to me, any lady who denies her husband his conjugal rights is a wicked woman.
Quote me anywhere. Don talk my own

gbemishile:

no conjugal rights in marriage?
So whats the whole essence of the rites performed on the wedding day?
What makes her different from the other single women out there?
I performed all the marriage rites on u cus u and i both agreed to grow- emotionally,physically,sexually and all that......

That's the point where I get to stop reading.

So, I deny you sex for one night and you throw all the "grow emotionally, physically, sexually" in the bin? I mean, its not like I'm saying no sex forever, and neither did I say I want to divorce you, though your lack of regard for my emotional well-being just so you can satisfy you diq is now worrying me.

Don't you know that I will not be growing in any way with you if you force yourself on me when I'm not willing? Don't you think you'll enjoy your fuq more if you wait for me to be in the mood?

Dude, please, you have my permission to go get yourself a second wife or an olosho, because this pussy is permanent shut to pigs!