House,
Are there any psilocybinn trials in Nigeria. I need that shit to jump-start my brain.
I would have loved to try weed, but I hear it can cause psychoses. And, boy, I'm just a few steps closer to psychosis.

I will appreciate ya responses.

Mamayam:
House,
Are there any psilocybinn trials in Nigeria. I need that shit to jump-start my brain.
I would have loved to try weed, but I hear it can cause psychoses. And, boy, I'm just a few steps closer to psychosis.

I will appreciate ya responses.

Why are you trying to use these psychoactive substances to "jumpstart" your brain?

Kobojunkie:
Why are you trying to use these psychoactive substances to "jumpstart" your brain?

I need the antidepressant effect of this drug.

Mamayam:

I need the antidepressant effect of this drug.

This instead of going to get you a prescription direct from your doctor or psychiatrist?

Kobojunkie:
This instead of going to get you a prescription direct from your doctor or psychiatrist?

Those ones have failed woefully.
Those psychiatrists don't have a clue about my problem.
They are just dumping antidepressants hoping one will work. Nothing else. No basic understanding of any of my symptoms.

Mamayam:

Those ones have failed woefully.
Those psychiatrists don't have a clue about my problem.
They are just dumping antidepressants hoping one will work. Nothing else. No basic understanding of any of my symptoms.

You, the patient are also supposed to do your own research , ask other patients to help narrow down the possibilities for yourself.

You claim they do not have a basic understanding of your symptoms, but since you know more, why not inform them of what it is that you are indeed struggling with so they can gain a subjective understanding there?

How long did you work with your doctors before xoncluding the know nothing? How many different antidepressants did you try and for approximately how long each?

Kobojunkie:
You, the patient are also supposed to do your own research , ask other patients to help narrow down the possibilities for yourself.

You claim they do not have a basic understanding of your symptoms, but since you know more, why not inform them of what it is that you are indeed struggling with so they can gain a subjective understanding there?

How long did you work with your doctors before xoncluding the know nothing? How many different antidepressants did you try and for approximately how long each?

I have done my research. I have very little in common with other depressed patients. They, too, don't have an idea of my problems. So maybe incorrect/incomplete diagnosis?
I tried about 10 antidepressants at least 4 months on each. Zero improvement.

Mamayam:

I have done my research. I have very little in common with other depressed patients. They, too, don't have an idea of my problems. So maybe incorrect/incomplete diagnosis?
I tried about 10 antidepressants at least 4 months on each. Zero improvement.

What are your depression symptoms?

Kobojunkie:
What are your depression symptoms?

I wouldn't use the word depression here. Depression as a word means a mood disorder. And depressive disorders are constructs that change from one DSM version to the other.
Simply, I went to the docs with certain symptoms in mind plus the regular depressive symptoms. The bolded (my description of them) were not properly understood by the doctors. The way forward is to assume that these symptoms are of Depression and hope that treatment with antidepressants would treat the root cause and, thus, eradicate these symptoms.
I have not met anyone with depression or anxiety on reddit, quora, twitter, facebook groups, social anxiety support, additude, that understands these symptoms when I describe them. This has caused me to doubt that the symptoms are really of depression.
They are pretty simple stuff. Cognitive deficits: 24/7 inability to block external auditory/visual stimuli. It is as if I am drowning in Background noise. Heightened voice pattern recognition: I am automatically searching for voice patterns in background noise. white noise, brown noise, fans, refrigerators, tinnitus, air conditioners, insects. Basically any background NOISE with soun frequencies in the human speech range. The big problem is that the voice patterns go straight to my subvocalization process overriding whatever I am thinking or subvocalizing.
The symptoms plenty. I dey watch ball. Later.

Mamayam:

I wouldn't use the word depression here. Depression as a word means a mood disorder. And depressive disorders are constructs that change from one DSM version to the other.
Simply, I went to the docs with certain symptoms in mind plus the regular depressive symptoms. The bolded (my description of them) were not properly understood by the doctors. The way forward is to assume that these symptoms are of Depression and hope that treatment with antidepressants would treat the root cause and, thus, eradicate these symptoms.
I have not met anyone with depression or anxiety on reddit, quora, twitter, facebook groups, social anxiety support, additude, that understands these symptoms when I describe them. This has caused me to doubt that the symptoms are really of depression.
They are pretty simple stuff.
■Cognitive deficits: 24/7 inability to block external auditory/visual stimuli. It is as if I am drowning in Background noise.
■Heightened voice pattern recognition: I am automatically searching for voice patterns in background noise. white noise, brown noise, fans, refrigerators, tinnitus, air conditioners, insects. Basically any background NOISE with soun frequencies in the human speech range. The big problem is that the voice patterns go straight to my subvocalization process overriding whatever I am thinking or subvocalizing.
The symptoms plenty. I dey watch ball. Later.

So who gave you the depression diagnosis, with the symptoms you listed here. Or are there other depression-related symptoms you failed to include here?

Kobojunkie:
So who gave you the depression diagnosis, with the symptoms you listed here. Or are there other depression-related symptoms you failed to include here?

Like I said, the usual low mood, low energy, psychomotor retatdation were already there. So definitely I must be getting on the several depressive disorders as my diagnosis.
That's not why I went there. I went therr because of the serious cognitive and sensory symptoms I was having.

Mamayam:

Like I said, the usual low mood, low energy, psychomotor retatdation were already there. So definitely I must be getting on the several depressive disorders as my diagnosis.
That's not why I went there. I went therr because of the serious cognitive and sensory symptoms I was having.

Which of these depression symptoms do you have?

■Persistent sad, anxious, or “empty” mood
■Feelings of hopelessness, or pessimism
■Irritability
■Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness
■Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities
■Decreased energy or fatigue
■Moving or talking more slowly
■Feeling restless or having trouble sitting still
■Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
■Difficulty sleeping, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping
■Appetite and/or weight changes
■Thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide attempts
■Aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems without a clear physical cause and/or that do not ease even with treatment

Kobojunkie:


■Persistent sad, anxious, or “empty” mood
■Feelings of hopelessness, or pessimism
Irritability
■Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness
Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities
Decreased energy or fatigue
Moving or talking more slowly
Feeling restless or having trouble sitting still
Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
Difficulty sleeping, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping
Appetite and/or weight changes
Thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide attempts
Aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems without a clear physical cause and/or that do not ease even with treatment

Definitely had most of the above.
But none were even a hundredth as severe as the sensory and cognitive issues I had.

Mamayam:

Definitely had most of the above.
But none were even a hundredth as severe as the sensory and cognitive issues I had.

Which ones?

Kobojunkie:
Which of these depression symptoms do you have?

■Persistent sad, anxious, or “empty” mood
■Feelings of hopelessness, or pessimism
■Irritability
[s]■Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness[/s]
■Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities
■Decreased energy or fatigue
■Moving or talking more slowly
■Feeling restless or having trouble sitting still
■Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
[s]■Difficulty sleeping, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping[/s]
■Appetite and/or weight changes
■Thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide attempts
[s]■Aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems without a clear physical cause and/or that do not ease even with treatment[/s]

Which ones? The unstruck.

Mamayam:
Which ones? The unstruck.

So did you get any diagnosis in addition to depression? Cause earlier, you mentioned sensory and cognitive issues.

Did you happen to maybe see a neurologist while you were searching for answers?

Kobojunkie:
So did you get any diagnosis in addition to depression? Cause earlier, you mentioned sensory and cognitive issues.

Did you happen to maybe see a neurologist while you were searching for answers?

Nah, just mixed anxiety depression as my diagnosis.
The neurologist said they required referral first. Met the psychiatrists for referral, they refused. They believe all my problems must be depression/anxiety.

Mamayam:

Nah, just mixed anxiety depression as my diagnosis.
The neurologist said they required referral first. Met the psychiatrists for referral, they refused. They believe all my problems must be depression/anxiety.

That's not good. My case, my doctor was a Neuro-psychiatrist so she was the one that convinced me to see a neurologist and then another specialist in my case.

Honestly, the journey to getting care involved doing a lot of selfresearch to better understand and express my condition so I could get the right help.

Kobojunkie:
That's not good. My case, my doctor was a Neuro-psychiatrist so she was the one that convinced me to see a neurologist and then another specialist in my case.

Honestly, the journey to getting care involved doing a lot of selfresearch to better understand and express my condition so I could get the right help.

They believed I should see neurologists only when there a neurological deficit is found. Did a brain scann, no abnormalities found. So I am back to square one with the psychiatrists.
I am just tired of them. I wish I were in lagos state where they have several govt psych hospitals. I would love to get a second opinion.

Mamayam:

They believed I should see neurologists only when there a neurological deficit is found. Did a brain scann, no abnormalities found. So I am back to square one with the psychiatrists.
I am just tired of them. I wish I were in lagos state where they have several govt psych hospitals. I would love to get a second opinion.

Brain scan doesn't do much as far as diagnosis of most mental illnesses and neurological ones, from my experience. Doctors seem to depend a lot on the description of the condition as given by the patients. I remember, even with my cognitive problems, I had to work hard on better communicating my issues before I was able to find lasting treatment about 4 years after i started, this all before my brain eventually crashed.

Kobojunkie:
Brain scan doesn't do much as far as diagnosis of most mental illnesses and neurological ones, from my experience. Doctors seem to depend a lot on the description of the condition as given by the patients. I remember, even with my cognitive problems, I had to work hard on better communicating my issues before I was able to find lasting treatment about 4 years after i started, this all before my brain eventually crashed.

You're lucky you are in a functional country. If my brain crash here, na street I go dey roam.

Mamayam:
House,
Are there any psilocybinn trials in Nigeria. I need that shit to jump-start my brain.
I would have loved to try weed, but I hear it can cause psychoses. And, boy, I'm just a few steps closer to psychosis.

I will appreciate ya responses.

Have you tried knowing if you have triggers?
Have you tried trying to decipher circumstances or scenarios that makes it start?
Concerning the sound issue.
Start by trying to figure out your triggers,once you can state a couple of them,the next step is to see if you can avoid the triggers.

Sometimes if avoidance isn't helping,you might want to just bring the trigger right to you and get pretty familiar with it
Most psychotic situations have triggering effects.
So try knowing your triggers first.
As for being depressed,also try knowing what triggers the mood swings.
As for the anxiety disorder.
As much as I know it can be chronic, having the heart beat racing all at once with no particular fear in sight,I believe there's a chemical explanation for that, having something to do with the part of the brain that senses danger.
Anxiety disorders can be controlled,it starts with the mind,it can be controlled through the same mind.
It's more like unlocking unseen fear's.

Lucrativress:

Have you tried knowing if you have triggers?
Have you tried trying to decipher circumstances or scenarios that makes it start?

There are no triggers. It is constant. 24/7 365. I have dwelled on each and every symptom for days at a stretch, observed them, researched them.

Concerning the sound issue.
Start by trying to figure out your triggers,once you can state a couple of them,the next step is to see if you can avoid the triggers.

I think the problem is two-fold. First, the inability to filter/block Background sound/noise means almost everything gets processed in my head. So long as there is random meaningless sound of frequencies in the human speech range, my brain automatically starts processing it, trying to find meaning in it. Once, it catches on a voice pattern, it automatically plays the pattern in my head, using up my subvocalization process. There is no escaping it. If I block external sounds from my ear, there is tinitus waiting for me in the quiet.

Sometimes if avoidance isn't helping,you might want to just bring the trigger right to you and get pretty familiar with it
Most psychotic situations have triggering effects.
So try knowing your triggers first.
As for being depressed,also try knowing what triggers the mood swings.
As for the anxiety disorder.
As much as I know it can be chronic, having the heart beat racing all at once with no particular fear in sight,I believe there's a chemical explanation for that, having something to do with the part of the brain that senses danger.
Anxiety disorders can be controlled,it starts with the mind,it can be controlled through the same mind.
It's more like unlocking unseen fear's.

The low mood was pretty abstracy to me until 2017. I knew I had low mood, it didn't vary much(no swings or episodes, 24/7), until an antidepressant further lowered my mood to almost nothing. I was in bed for almost a month. My mood improved to my normal low levels. But I tell you, I don't have swings. Same for the anxiety(sociàl). My heartbeat is mostly normal.

Mamayam:

There are no triggers. It is constant. 24/7 365. I have dwelled on each and every symptom for days at a stretch, observed them, researched them.


I think the problem is two-fold. First, the inability to filter/block Background sound/noise means almost everything gets processed in my head. So long as there is random meaningless sound of frequencies in the human speech range, my brain automatically starts processing it, trying to find meaning in it. Once, it catches on a voice pattern, it automatically plays the pattern in my head, using up my subvocalization process. There is no escaping it. If I block external sounds from my ear, there is tinitus waiting for me in the quiet.


The low mood was pretty abstracy to me until 2017. I knew I had low mood, it didn't vary much(no swings or episodes, 24/7), until an antidepressant further lowered my mood to almost nothing. I was in bed for almost a month. My mood improved to my normal low levels. But I tell you, I don't have swings. Same for the anxiety(sociàl). My heartbeat is mostly normal.

I guess you have part of your therapy in your words.
You might want to relocate to a more quiet place.
You can find a place pretty closer to nature.
When you hear the birds chirp at dawn,the frogs and crickets making their sounds at night.
The animals makimg noise during the day.
The trees making whistling sounds.
The mind and ears gets accustomed to this,tried making a meaning of them but will take them for what they are,with time it will embrace those sounds as "serene and secure".
Peace and quiet,only nature making sounds.
With time start playing very calm music's.
Soothing to your ears, gradually gradually.
Because that twitching sound from inside of your ears will remind you of the Crickets at night
And you'll once more take that as "soothing".
Welcoming everything till it gets so so familiar.
Later bring in earpiece to listen to your music.
But you'll need to relocate to "peace and quiet".

Lucrativress:

I guess you have part of your therapy in your words.
You might want to relocate to a more quiet place.
You can find a place pretty closer to nature.
When you hear the birds chirp at dawn,the frogs and crickets making their sounds at night.
The animals makimg noise during the day.
The trees making whistling sounds.
The mind and ears gets accustomed to this,tried making a meaning of them but will take them for what they are,with time it will embrace those sounds as "serene and secure".
Peace and quiet,only nature making sounds.
With time start playing very calm music's.
Soothing to your ears, gradually gradually.
Because that twitching sound from inside of your ears will remind you of the Crickets at night
And you'll once more take that as "soothing".
Welcoming everything till it gets so so familiar.
Later bring in earpiece to listen to your music.
But you'll need to relocate to "peace and quiet".

The thing is, I am not irritated by these sounds. Irritability as a symptom was resolved in 2018.
These sounds are serene and all, so long as I am not trying to concentrate on something else, or trying to read(requires subvocalization).

Mamayam:

The thing is, I am not irritated by these sounds. Irritability as a symptom was resolved in 2018.
These sounds are serene and all, so long as I am not trying to concentrate on something else, or trying to read(requires subvocalization).

I won't tell you to trust me but I know what that sound is like.
Pretty annoying.
It's good you're not trying to get rid of it by putting stuffs inside your ears.
The fact you are trying to find a solution to it means you're uncomfortable with it.
Or what exactly do you want?

Lucrativress:

I won't tell you to trust me but I know what that sound is like.
Pretty annoying.
It's good you're not trying to get rid of it by putting stuffs inside your ears.
The fact you are trying to find a solution to it means you're uncomfortable with it.
Or what exactly do you want?

Of course, it is a disorder. A serious one.
The problem is not the sound. The same cricket, generator sounds etc that were nothing 10 years ago suddenly have pattern to them. I think there is an overactivity somewhere in the brain. I have the visual one too. I enter a room, look at a "smooth wall" and the millions of dirts, bits of cement, holes immediately form a facial pattern. These patterns would take hours to catch before. Same as the sound patterns. The symptom has improved before. Some of those patterns become less obvious. If my condition worsens, I immediately hear new patterns I was oblivious to.
It is a serious disorder no one has to endure. It is sole reason I am not able to read to comprehend. I can only do scanning/skimming. I have been unable to study anything since 2017!

Antispambot eh!

Mamayam:

Of course, it is a disorder. A serious one.
The problem is not the sound. The same cricket, generator sounds etc that were nothing 10 years ago suddenly have pattern to them. I think there is an overactivity somewhere in the brain. I have the visual one too. I enter a room, look at a "smooth wall" and the millions of dirts, bits of cement, holes immediately form a facial pattern. These patterns would take hours to catch before. Same as the sound patterns. The symptom has improved before. Some of those patterns become less obvious. If my condition worsens, I immediately hear new patterns I was oblivious to.
It is a serious disorder no one has to endure. It is sole reason I am not able to read to comprehend. I can only do scanning/skimming. I have been unable to study anything since 2017!

So it's one of these two
Either get involved in things and people more or reduce it.
Getting involved helps with an healthy distraction.
Next is to trick your mind
When shapes starts to form like a human face or an anomalous form,tell yourself "it is nothing" and remove your eyes from it.
You have to trick your mind.
It all starts inside your head.
As for the sound's,if you've not been given meds to balance the cerebral part that might be causing that.
For now,when you hear them, just say it's nothing, you're just fine,then you can go ahead to use your earpiece in playing music.

When everywhere is quiet,play rhythm and Blues.
Play Country music.
There's this Nigerian old school that's just like Apala,slow tunes.
Play them.

Music doesn't just soothe the soul alone,it helps soothe the mind too.

Replace abnormal rhythm with soothing one's,for now ,make sure nowhere is completely quiet.
Try your best to calm your mind,trick it to "all is well"
You'll be fine.
Merry Christmas in advance.

Lucrativress:

So it's one of these two
Either get involved in things and people more or reduce it.
Getting involved helps with an healthy distraction.
Next is to trick your mind
When shapes starts to form like a human face or an anomalous form,tell yourself "it is nothing" and remove your eyes from it.
You have to trick your mind.
It all starts inside your head.
As for the sound's,if you've not been given meds to balance the cerebral part that might be causing that.
For now,when you hear them, just say it's nothing, you're just fine,then you can go ahead to use your earpiece in playing music.

When everywhere is quiet,play rhythm and Blues.
Play Country music.
There's this Nigerian old school that's just like Apala,slow tunes.
Play them.

Music doesn't just soothe the soul alone,it helps soothe the mind too.

Replace abnormal rhythm with soothing one's,for now ,make sure nowhere is completely quiet.
Try your best to calm your mind,trick it to "all is well"
You'll be fine.
Merry Christmas in advance.

I am actually more interested in the "antidepressant" effects of psilocybinn. From my reading, the effect comes fast unlike traditional antidepressants.
I really want to see which of my cognitive deficits will improve with the "depression". Because my cognitive issues have improved temporarily/permanently in matter of minutes and hours, just like a switch. Yet the antidepressants are supposed to take time(years?) before they start to work?

Mamayam:

I am actually more interested in the "antidepressant" effects of psilocybinn. From my reading, the effect comes fast unlike traditional antidepressants.
I really want to see which of my cognitive deficits will improve with the "depression". Because my cognitive issues have improved temporarily/permanently in matter of minutes and hours, just like a switch. Yet the antidepressants are supposed to take time(years?) before they start to work?

Antidepressants are not magics you know.
It's a process
You have to take consistent medications.
With time you can stop or not.
As you take it,getting active and working on staying happy will help quicken the process.