Emperor88:


I was sexually molested by 3 different adult females btw the age 9 to 15....But No one cares because I was a boy.

I'm truly sorry... This is my point!

Do you know that women would be more sympathetic to your plight than men who would tell you to 'man up' or 'grow a pair' or tell you that 'you enjoyed being molested'...

This system that didnt favour you is patriarchy... men think they can't be hurt because they are men and tough, blah blah blah... But you can be victims as much as women...

Jman06:
Stop bringing nature and the universe into this. It is simply the way the early men set things during the stone age. That time, the means to survival were highly laborious and required so much brawn than brain. So, they felt the females were weaker (even though arguable), so they were put behind the males, such that the men did most of the work and catered for the women in exchange for sex and reproduction. That was how it all started.

But now things have changed. Modernization has made it such that survival requires more of mental energy than just physical and from what we have seen so far, the women are fairing better than even some men in this jet age.

So, to maintain peace, things just have to change. We need to redefine certain things, otherwise a time would come when men and women would be in great conflict.

Your last paragraph only applies to black people.
Real human beings are doing way more important things with their brains than caring who is a girl or who is a boy.

Is this not the problem we have on nairaland today? Every thread is a girl bashing thread.

While we protect the girl child, let us educate the boy child on how to treat a girl child

Godoverevery:
After doing alot of research online to see if UNICEF or Government really care about a boy child..... i found out nobody cares.

Care to share your reasoning and research sources?

This a thread to let female folks understand the hate towards them now isn't something that just pop up from nowhere but more psychological which is cause by neglect from society and harsh laws toward men.

What hate are you talking about?
There have always been gender-based hatred and it is even much better now.
Care to list those "harsh laws" for men only?

This is one the most disjointed piece I ever read.
I can't even place the message or the intended target.
Mothers hate their son, UNICEF only for girls and threat of more hate if activist don't
do what you want.

Angela62:
Not until I gave birth to my son and started raising them, before I understood the kinds of challenges the male child faces. Society is built on the false premise that women have challenges only, and men are the cause if it. So therefore, male child are ignored. Before I use to tout anything female, but now, I can see that it's not a good approach because both gender suffer.

But I ask myself, after developing and elevating women, will they date and marry themselves? Isn't the same men that society ignored and don't want to invest upon will be their future husband, Co workers, pastors and much more? You can't tell me you love women and want to help them, why refusing to help men, same men that the majority of female happiness comes from. The earlier we open our eyes to the bigger picture, the better for all of us.

Sir, do you know what scares me the most? It's the fact that a country like Nigeria is emphasizing Education for girls alone. But imagine a society with educated women and the men, most of the men are thugs, terrorists, illiterates, agberos and all sorts of criminals including those that have become delinquent due to the society's stance against them; how would the females cope?


Can the females be safe if majority of the males are wild, uncared for and unemployed? Isn't our society setting itself up?

.

xamuell:
Ouch! Harsh much.
Nevertheless, you've got points there especially your last statement (however harsh the presentation)
To whom much is given, much is expected. Our male predecessors set themselves on a superiority pedestal, creating one mindset toward men. Men are the epitome of strength.
A slightly wrong notion as some men have come to realise, however, indoctrination is quite hard to correct. This brings about relative nonchalance to the supposed "Invincible gender"

I'm not hurt... Just annoyed that you men don't even realise that it's your fellow men who created a system you all now regret... Not women...

We were called weak... And we've fought for our rights to be recognised... You can do the same but remember, you're mostly going to fight yourselves and egos...

Accepting you're equal... That you can be hurt... Most men won't... And it boomerangs... But don't blame us.

What is wrong with your mouth ?. You called iyabo ojo to speak up for the boy child why didn't you call tuface and wizkid ? Oys women who already have enough problems from.ruw patriarchal society that should still help u people fight ur battles ? And you kept mentioning hate ? Why should any man hate a women simply because he is unbothered to fight for boy kids and women fight for girl kids ? Did anybody tell you people not to fight for boy kids ?
If it is too fight and advocate all day about what women do with their vagina - you people's voice will be loud and strong but to fight for what Is really important we can never find you people there
Pls go and hate other men like yourselves - leave women alone.

This is absolutely and totally the fault of men. Men are the biggest disappointment of all creatures. Foolish men carry female matter on their heads while completely ignoring their fellow men

zed7:

Seems you're the one more in need of an English lesson.

You should be able to defend your points as a "strong man".
You chose to run instead, an action which belie your strength facade.

zed7:

You're not intelligent. I can't make head or tail of this write up.

All I can see from her responses is anger and bitterness. I do hope that she isn't a broken misandrist.

Angela62:
Not until I gave birth to my son and started raising them, before I understood the kinds of challenges the male child faces. Society is built on the false premise that women have challenges only, and men are the cause if it. So therefore, male child are ignored. Before I use to tout anything female, but now, I can see that it's not a good approach because both gender suffer.

But I ask myself, after developing and elevating women, will they date and marry themselves? Isn't the same men that society ignored and don't want to invest upon will be their future husband, Co workers, pastors and much more? You can't tell me you love women and want to help them, why refusing to help men, same men that the majority of female happiness comes from. The earlier we open our eyes to the bigger picture, the better for all of us.

My cp Nairalander

Your questions and thoughts are as gpod as mine.


Same way i have always wondered. Since the world is busy pushing woman to the front. They want woman to have more power, more position than men.

Then am like,

When men go to work and brings in money who eats the money. Dont the man brings the money for the family where there are sisters, and wifes.

The world is so damanged men!

Am nevwr saying that woman should not work or be in good positions. But the manner which the society pushes these things. They push it in the way that men now appears to be relegated to the back. Where no one cares anymore .

I just wish one day things could come back to normal.

That is by us and the world to start having True God fearing Leaders.

Even us in our africa. I think we forgot our roots.

A culture where the Man would be treated like the King, wife like the Queen and the siblings prince and princesses.

Less competition, a life where everyone know and understand there position.

Leaving in peace, love and harmony.

And not these Crazy world where a wife is comfortable chasing money all around the world for months negleting peace and love her home without remorse. (After person go die leaving the whole money. No enjoyment)

Somebody should please wake me up to the reality jor!

Jman06:
I love your post and your sincerity on this subject.

That is what I have been saying. In our societies today, especially among the Igbos, more emphasis are placed on educating the girl children while their male counterparts are sent to go learn trade or skill with little or no education. When the females are done getting the best of education and jobs, they start searching for a suitable partner and unfortunately, they hardly find the kind of guys they want from amongst their people. So, some of them are left with no choice than look for equally educated men from other tribes while others settle in the awkward marriage with their barely educated Igbo traders. While the rest remain unmarried.

I believe there's need for value reorientation among our people. Equal opportunities should be given to both genders in terms of education and jobs. After all, so much is still demanded of men in our societies when it comes to shouldering family and societal responsibilities.

I wonder what kind of nonsense I will not hear from you small-minded lots on this forum about Igbos. I wonder where you got the statistics that most Igbo families do sentimentally send their daughters to school instead of their sons or deny their sons formal education, and that by extension, saying that men from other tribes are more educated than Igbomen, even when the SSCE and JAMB records and other proven statistical measures locally and internationally said otherwise. The way some of you propagate lies and misinformation because of ignorance, hate in any guise, ethnocentrism, or conceit is both appalling and irritating. I do not care whether you might claim to be an Igboman or not, whichever way, you are definitely not an informed and just one. Stop either using your family as a standard for the bona fide Igbos or stop saying nonsense about what you know nothing about. Distorting facts, misinforming the public, and casting aspersions on others unjustly, regardless of the reason, amount to small-mindedness and insanity in general.

In summary, I have not seen a bona fide Igbo family that does discriminate against their offspring educationally to be particular.

I won't care about any gibberish you might wish to spew, so direct it, if any, to small-minded people like you.

Emperor88:


I was sexually molested by 3 different adult females btw the age 9 to 15....But No one cares because I was a boy.

No one apart from your parents or guardian owes you anything.
I bet you didn't even tell your parents but expect "society" to read your mind
and jump to your defense against the culprit.

And if you are like most posters here, you will only bring up the issue to counter
other people's narratives.

That's not true over history in Africa and the west women care for themselves and their children even without enjoying any form of love or pampering.... They've been deliberate manipulation to make men worship women
Especially through the media it's all manipulation by the west.......The effects is already showing in the west and would be obvious in Nigeria....Many families have been abandoned all in an attempt to please the a new wife this was not so before....Men are being manipulated by women using sex everyday yet no one is against it to them it's their body effects of this is that we have high rate of distracted boys not doing well in school but girls do have little distraction coming out being the best graduating student in Medicine, Even Engineering this days and the support for them far outweigh the boys just because a girl succeeded....
Prior to the era were there were no social media, indecency, even mainstream boys performed better in absolutely everything and alot of boys got married earlier than now they were less rape issues and even the ones that gave birth out of wedlock were still men doing well for themselves.......
The society is about to a dangerous phase for the boy child if certain this are not put in place they might learn the hard way since alot thinks bad about them and appreciate the female child beyond what they are .....
#Stophateonmen

Ow0eg0kudi:
Hmmmm @Godoverevery

Except if you choose to swim against the tide...nature has created the female gender to be nurtured, especially by the male gender hence the results of your research.

Save in exceptional cases, there is something in a man that wants to pamper and give a TCL to a woman.

I'll enjoin to accept the fact that it is a law of the universe, just like gravitational pull, that YOU cannot change except God (who is over every) chooses to reinvent the wheels.


E kú research . . .don't be an online professor but please ensure it is published in a journal��

Angela62:
Not until I gave birth to my son and started raising them, before I understood the kinds of challenges the male child faces. Society is built on the false premise that women have challenges only, and men are the cause if it. So therefore, male child are ignored. Before I use to tout anything female, but now, I can see that it's not a good approach because both gender suffer.

But I ask myself, after developing and elevating women, will they date and marry themselves? Isn't the same men that society ignored and don't want to invest upon will be their future husband, Co workers, pastors and much more? You can't tell me you love women and want to help them, why refusing to help men, same men that the majority of female happiness comes from. The earlier we open our eyes to the bigger picture, the better for all of us.

men are the cause of majority of problems women face- when women are denied rights to education jobs , property , inheritance , sexual agency ,etc who do you think is behind all those laws ?
Which men does society ignore ? Every political body that makes laws is filled with men - and they make laws that favour themselves .
How many women do banks give loans to ? How many women do investors give loans to ?

I wish I could see you and really explain to you how these things work to you.

Jman06:
Very selfish gender!
That is why after sacrificing the education and empowerment of the boy child for them, they'll still want to "marry up" even if it means marrying aliens so long as he's well off.

the education of the girl child was sacrificed for the boy child which is why there is more focus on the girl child so she can catch up with the boy child - Boys at this point are more advantaged than girls - this is a fact

Jman06:
And I hope that after raising her to the level of the boy child, she'll stop being a burden on the boy child She'll not expect the boy child to provide for her wellbeing And that she'll see marriage as shared responsibility and not the responsibility of the men alone

stop deluding yourself with this rubbish dishonest narrative - majority of households are two income households - you people are so dishonest- majority of women earn a living from trade or a job before they get married- oys nobody's fault.thay you want to marry a girl not as successful so you can Lord it over her as master of the household.

Godoverevery:
After doing alot of research online to see if UNICEF or Government really care about a boy child..... i found out nobody cares.

This a thread to let female folks understand the hate towards them now isn't something that just pop up from nowhere but more psychological which is cause by neglect from society and harsh laws toward men.

There are several millions of campaigns in every part of the world towards fighting for the girl child....infact there are millions of activist fighting everyday for this agenda but no one is talking about the boy child.

We talk about rape,molestation,child marriage etc which are very bad toward the girl child but what about child labour which is actually what most boys up north face everyday.
Does it means mothers don't love there son?? or they feel is right for a boy to be on the street survivaling on his own from tender age of 10??

Are we saying having little boys doing labour in site, boy soldiers in war zone,sleeping on the street, going through molestation in hands of there oga etc is a lesser evil compare to rape,child marriage etc.

Everyone talks about what a girl child pass through in the north but not for one day has anyone spoken about what boys are facing which is much more......a boy of 5yrs in the north is on the street already doing various things to survive infact he can even be taking money to his mother and sisters to feed.....some are taken by boko haram forced into fighting a war.

We all talk about chibok girls but no one has talked about some boys book haram kidnapped years back and force them to join the war...those who were not willing to join were executed instantly.

Am not trying to bring a gender war here am just trying to bring this to people mind...the likes of tonto dike, iyabo ojo etc who have sons should also speak up for the boy child....isn't only the girl child that needs protection.

There are several laws created everyday to protect the female gender all over the world even absurd ones (like Ronaldinho paying 13k £ to a ex gf every month as maintenance fee) which is a Brazilian law and Canada is also trying to pass the same law.....how won't this cause hate??

Even though most of this laws are created by fellow men who i think are just simply foolish but ladies need not to exploit it..

Government of the world need to create laws to protect men/boy as well.

Things need to change else this hate will keep on increasing...government and society need to start advocating the boy child rights too so this feel of ño one cares which is transforming to hate towards female gender will stop.

The same way we are condemning rape of minors and child marriages let condemn child labour, boy soldiers, let condemn why the society feel comfortable with seeing minor boys on the streets.

Let speak up for boy child aswell.

You're wise. God bless your hustle

dhiqson:
If we speak
Who will hear us?
Well let society ignore us
Let those ladies ignore us


When we're made
We'll celebrate by our own damn selfs

who is ignoring you?.is there anything.g wrong with men fighting for the boy child just like you fight to police women's pvssies - infact if men could dedicate one tenth of the energy they use to measure women's vagina ro issues concerning the boy child- the boy child will be fine .

Datboredberry:


The reason there's more emphasis on girl child education is because of the fact that girls around the world were not educated but expected to be wives and mothers...

These campaigns have successfully balanced the equation... Do you even realise that in Nigeria, more boys than girls are educated? Do you even bloody care?

Before you complain, go criticize the men who made it a law that girls aren't intelligent enough or worthy to go to school...

That's why we are where we are... Patriarchy back fires!

Maybe in the north. In the east there are more girls in the university than boys. There are more female graduates than males.

Datboredberry:


The reason there's more emphasis on girl child education is because of the fact that girls around the world were not educated but expected to be wives and mothers...

These campaigns have successfully balanced the equation... Do you even realise that in Nigeria, more boys than girls are educated? Do you even bloody care?

Before you complain, go criticize the men who made it a law that girls aren't intelligent enough or worthy to go to school...

That's why we are where we are... Patriarchy back fires!

This law you spoke of ended like 20 years ago. If at all a gender is getting educated, it is females that gets educated now compared to the male child.
Two wrongs doesn't make a right. The post is focusing on the male child here, atleast for once let's talk about the male child. You don't have to shift the focus to female gender.
The OP is saying facts and he is trying to make a point. Everything shouldn't be a war or white and black. There should be a grey area for reason and introspect.
You will have a male child some day. You wouldn't want if due to like of attention he is molested or assaulted or builllied. I like when humans are not bias the only reason you speak like this is because you are a female. If you were a male definitely it wouldn't be this.
Always let your reasoning vesound deviod of your sex.

My brother, you’re making sense oo, but some people won’t like this your sense.

You’ll never see a ministry of boys/men affairs...NEVER!
You’ll never hear or see a guy say he was raped yet it happens. Even if a guy manages to speak up about the ordeal, society will laugh at him for complaining when he should be celebrating. They conveniently forget that the boy will be scarred for life - thanks to aunties with hot pants that won’t let him be.

Regardless we move!
Men are so resilient, we take most shit that others won’t and still come out on top.
Shout out to all the boys and men out there!!!

Datboredberry:
Yes! Sexual abuse... One in three girls have been abused by a man... Before the age of 18... Most boys who have been abused were raped by fellow men...

Don't be stupidly sentimental... It's life balanced? Women are usually victims, hence the receive more attention...

Because they usually are... A girl child is more liable to be abused, trafficked, mistreated, denied of an education than their male counterparts... And the perpetrators of these crimes are most often men...

actually, you're pathetic...

That's why boys should be taught that patriarchy is wrong... It back fires... They should not take advantage of young girls... That would fix the problem...

Exactly! And these boys should be educated so they don't behave like animals like their fathers... But to be gentle men...

Lol! You're sick... So men abusing women is somewhat justified because they are jealous that the world campaigs for girls to not be raped or that they should go to school? Petty much?

You think it's chocolate... The girls who've undergone female genitalịa mutilation? Married off as kids?

Treat a woman with respect and there's nothing to fear...

Is Nairaland the real life? Are you that stupid? In the world put there, young girls are being abused, used as sex slaves and you're here mentioning Nairaland where we all do sh** to catch cruise? Sick! You're the one making this a 'girl child vs Us' thing...

The men who made women victims... Blame them... They cause this divide that we're obligated to bridge...

Isn't it a man's world? Aren't women the fairer sex... It's sad how men shot themselves in the foot with these arguments...

Accept that men and women are equal... Only then would the issue of a man being a victim make sense to the general society...

But when you dimwits carry yourselves like demi-god, don't feel bad when we say you can not bleed.

Men and women can never be equal.

Grandmeister:

Maybe in the north. In the east there are more girls in the university than boys. There are more female graduates than males.

These boys have the opportunity to go to school...girls on the other hand are deliberately prevented from doing so... Understand?

ukaface:
I get the point
But you know why ' fight for boy child' won't come up?
Cos they've already sold it to the society that ' men are superior' ' man no dey cry'
Fighting for the boy child' would seem soft and a girly thing to do.
So who is to blame?
Women, females have been thought to be weak, the lesser class in terms of superiority,so more fights for their right has surfaced. A larger percentage of women fight for the right and course of women/ girl child.

Which man/ men fit swallow pride and ego to come out and fight for the male?

But, wait o. Wetin una one fight for again. I thought it's a man' s world after all

all they want to fight for is submission , right to police women's vagina , right to be polygamous etc
The boy child is not their wahala o

[quote author=Alexclem post=107953772][/quote] and who is the cause of that- no be you men write all the rules .

Datboredberry:
It's sad you can't comprehend that it's men who made women burdens...

Years ago, men said women are weak... So women shouldn't work... So women shouldn't earn... So women should stay home... So women should expect to be taken care off...

Feminism is trying to encourage women to actually be independent...

Can you see how stupid men were then?

So because you think women are dependent, you're not in support of young African girls being educated?

Two third of the 750 million illiterates worldwide are women... Do you care?

That statistics is so because of Islam. Say it, nobody will chop off your head. I'm guessing you have sisters and you all are educated. Women have always been getting education for the past 300 years atleast. My mum was sent to school and her elder brother was sent to learn a trade, my mum is over 60 years old. The likes of okonjo and Dora nkọ? When you lots say this one will be hoodwinked into thinking women only started going to school 10 years ago.

Don’t mind the hypocrites. That was how I was almost drowned in believing that the boy child should be shouted at and his sisters spoken softly to. I had to call myself to order at a certain point

Good

ukaface:
I get the point
But you know why ' fight for boy child' won't come up?
Cos they've already sold it to the society that ' men are superior' ' man no dey cry'
Fighting for the boy child' would seem soft and a girly thing to do.
So who is to blame?
Women, females have been thought to be weak, the lesser class in terms of superiority,so more fights for their right has surfaced. A larger percentage of women fight for the right and course of women/ girl child.

Which man/ men fit swallow pride and ego to come out and fight for the male?

But, wait o. Wetin una one fight for again. I thought it's a man' s world after all

Your whole quote equate a boy child to a man. It's just a matter of time b4 boy child advocate will sprung from all angles. We talking about kids been ignored. Go to d north, many of d family take care of d girl child till marriage age and thanks to girl child activist, d marriage age is shifting to 18 but the boys are thrown into d street from d age of 5, they are left to fight starvation, death, rape and blank future. The OP write up is cool and the write up Is not to discourage girl child activist but it's high time to start taking boy child problems as serious as girl child. Just visit d north and I'm sure u will cry after seeing dos small small 4/5years old boys everywhere struggling, begging with a very little chance of a brighter future. In addidum, this boys child that we are ignoring today, many of dem turned out to be d boko haram dat cost us our peace. The world better stand up

@ Op Godoverevery
Thank you for speaking up..
I have never and would never support Girl child this and Women right that..
It is injustice to always be on the look out for a gender and sidelining another..

Males are now endangered species no thanks to sympathy by both govt and people towards only the female folks..