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Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. - Romance (3) - Nairaland

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Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OLUPET009(m): 4:56pm On Dec 17, 2021
FREEBNB:
uesless man she abort for u. and u no fit marry am. u wan spoil her show as person wan marry am na people like u them dey curse say u no go see pikin till u die. so u think telling ur friend and she won't know it's u. u be big mumu. ur mate dey marry babe way abort for them but u no fit mind ur business. no be ur mate wan marry so. smh. too many useless men
no b me frustrate U nap, d bae na my close friends like we are still dating. Am not telling him anything not now or ever moreover am not like u
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Godswillu(m): 5:05pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
Not that, I just feel he should know. As for Me am not ready for prisoner ring yet
Now i see why you want to tell him
what makes you believe that the next lady will be better.
my guy every lady have her story. If you start listen to stories ....... let me stop here.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OLUPET009(m): 5:10pm On Dec 17, 2021
wirinet:


I hope you would mind if she too inform your prospective bride (whenever you are ready for prisoner ring ) that you have been responsible for abortions (now we don't know how many).
I wonder why people only blame the woman for abortions. You went in raw but you were not ready for prisoner ring. If you had promised her marriage, i am sure she would not choose to abort.

You are so hell bent in destroying the life of the lady. Why the hate? She offend you?
u are wrong about me, I love as a friend even b4 n after d dating. We are very very gud friends, am wishing Dem gud by zipping up. Thanks
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by slimanyd: 5:50pm On Dec 17, 2021
OnyeMmeri:
You owe that dude the duty of telling him that he's about to marry a hoe who aborted your baby. She's a murderer.

It's best he knows whom he's getting married to. If he loves her well enough to consider this info inconsequential, then let him proceed with the marriage.

At times, I still wonder if these same pastors that do tell us to pray b4 marrying also does same o. Cos, its glaring these lady the pastor is about to marry is a hoe and a killer. Does it mean he did not see a clear vision or the vision is blur?
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Imustnottalk: 5:52pm On Dec 17, 2021
killmods:

If u think that is success then i honestly have nothing to say to u
to you it's nothing but to others it means alot
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by wirinet(m): 7:15pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
u are wrong about me, I love as a friend even b4 n after d dating. We are very very gud friends, am wishing Dem gud by zipping up. Thanks
I appreciate you have a change of heart. That she aborted for you does not make her a bad person or that she would make a bad wife. She took a risk with you and lost. She took a risk with your friend and won. She might even be pregnant for him.

Try and understand life from a woman's perspective. The clock runs against them faster and they might never know a man's real intentions until after tasting into the cookie jar.

Be happy for them and wish them a happy marriage.

1 Like

Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by wirinet(m): 7:17pm On Dec 17, 2021
slimanyd:


At times, I still wonder if these same pastors that do tell us to pray b4 marrying also does same o. Cos, its glaring these lady the pastor is about to marry is a hoe and a killer. Does it mean he did not see a clear vision or the vision is blur?
She is a hoe because she refused to be a baby mama? Did the OP tell you that he paid her for sex?
Why the hatred for women? Remember your mother and sisters are women.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by wirinet(m): 7:23pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
no b me frustrate U nap, d bae na my close friends like we are still dating. Am not telling him anything not now or ever moreover am not like u

Na here I go come vex for you. Are you just platonic friends or friends with benefits. You need to have a heart to heart talk with bae, to establish your relationship and boundaries. It's immoral to continue have sexual relations with her while she is married or preparing to marry.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by EhischemNg: 7:28pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
Not that, I just feel he should know. As for Me am not ready for prisoner ring yet

Guy shut your mouth up. You are the bad person here not she.

"You don't want to be a prisoner of ring".. Yet slept with her to the extent of getting her pregnant.
You irresponsibility level is high now you wanna add gossip.

You have nothing to lose for shutting up your mouth

Don't spoil her happiness cause of your stinky pride and lifestyle
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by frozen70(f): 7:30pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
There is this lady we dated for like five months, before going out separate ways although we are still great friends. But before we started dating, there is a pastor friend (good) of mine who once ask out around March this year with the help of a senior Pastor who arrange the meeting between them, but she refuse giving some k-leg excuses. During the period of us been together, she took in but requested she aborted but I wasn't ok with it though. Just recently the Pastor friend call me and say they are getting along n preparing to marry her by next year. Wine has starting flying self. He even ask me of advise concerning the LADY. Meanwhile she is not aware that I know about their relationship. According to her she has dated three persons before me. Both of them are very close friends of mine. Should I tell Him the whole story And possibly save him or I should just close my mouth and watch how things play. I need mature advise please.

Wish them good luck and don't create problems for two of them

Since you can't marry her, let her follow who will marry her

We must learn how to mind our business
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OLUPET009(m): 7:31pm On Dec 17, 2021
wirinet:


Na here I go come vex for you. Are you just platonic friends or friends with benefits. You need to have a heart to heart talk with bae, to establish your relationship and boundaries. It's immoral to continue have sexual relations with her while she is married or preparing to marry.
platonic friends after d break up with heavy plank for d boundaries n Am not crossing d line knowing wat is on ground. I wanted to b sure doing d right thing by zipping up my mouth n watch na y I share d story. But d accuses against me is not cool.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OLUPET009(m): 7:41pm On Dec 17, 2021
I can't share d chat I had with him encouraging him to hasten up d process, am not a bad person n am very cool with both coming together
EhischemNg:


Guy shut your mouth up. You are the bad person here not she.

"You don't want to be a prisoner of ring".. Yet slept with her to the extent of getting her pregnant.
You irresponsibility level is high now you wanna add gossip.

You have nothing to lose for shutting up your mouth

Don't spoil her happiness cause of your stinky pride and lifestyle

1 Like

Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Kobojunkie: 8:03pm On Dec 17, 2021
killmods:

1. You guys are missing the whole point. I'm not saying he should tell his friend about the abortion. But i think he shouldn't be kept in the dark about them dating each other before now. In fact the matter tire me. OP should have let His friend know long before now that they were both an item.

2. You might be surprised she has already bared it all to the pastor guy and he has accepted her for who she is. The pastor may just be giving his "supposed" friend the opportunity to come clean with him. Point of correction I'm not a bout shaming her. Who perfect undecided

3.People like u are the reasons a lot of complications abound in simple matters. How do u know the pastor will run from her if he knows the truth? If she's even half smart she would let him know about her past not necessarily mentioning how many abortions she has done. So when the storms eventually come he will be willing to stand by her as nothing can throw him off balance . undecided

4. Don't limit God to what u think u know about Him. The saying God works in mysterious ways wasn't coined by a fool.. I won't waste time with all u half cocked niggaz anymore. The OP, all his friends, the girl and the marriage should all gtfo!!! None of my Biz
1. If OP chose to keep his friend in the dark when he was dating the lady while still friends with the pastor friend, then it was Op's decision to do that, not the gal to blame. undecided

A relationship, like a marriage, is between two individuals and no other person. So what happened between OP and this gal in that relationship is absolutely nobodies business, not even if the person is her gynecologist. That she had an abortion while with the OP is their personal issue and should be dealt with as such. No one outside of the relationship should even be privy to that information except the two guilty parties. undecided

2. When I was younger, the code used to be you don't kiss and tell. No matter what the trial here is, the OP shouldn't be going around telling anyone the details of his life with the lady in question. If she has taken to speaking of it with the pastor, that is on her. It is not the OP's place since the pastor was nor a part of the relationship he had with this woman. undecided

As for truth, that long tale of yours no enter at all. undecided

3. I don't see the world the way you do. From where I sit, there is nothing wrong with this lady having an abortion in her past. She has found herself a man she wants to marry and wants to marry her... it is that simple for me. You, on the other hand, are here attempting to complete this simple issue of relationships by suggesting that her past history of abortions has to be considered in her present decision and choice at happiness, something that makes no sense to me. undecided

And you speak of truth as though the pastor's past is not possibly filled with skeletons that might turn out worse in this. Look, if the pastor and the woman, both of them in their own relationship choose to open up about their pasts to each other, that is there choice to make. And after all,it is their relationship that is to to tested. However, a third-party like the Op has no business planting himself as relationship tester for the two. lipsrsealed

4. Kindly learn to leave God, the one who explained from the beginning to you, that a relationship, is an agreement between a man and a woman - no third-parties welcome - out of this foolishness, abeg! undecided
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Opeyemiextra(f): 8:26pm On Dec 17, 2021
thinksquad:
if the pastor was your brother and you know something like that about the wife to be , will you wish them well and look away?? Na jus question ooo

Honestly, this your thought process is baffling. If the lady were your sister, would you blow her out? Because she had an abortion or what? You will only be deceiving yourself if you think everyone you will meet is a saint. This is why most people find it hard to open up about their past.

Just what if she has told the guy in question, how will this ex look telling him what he already knows. His thought most likely would be that he wants to ruin their relationship. When you are dealing with people, you have to be careful and learn.

I will advise you read my comment again, understand it before you type anything. Throw the first stone if you haven't sinned before.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by lamaooo(m): 8:28pm On Dec 17, 2021
You better tell him now ooo grin grin
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OnyeMmeri: 8:34pm On Dec 17, 2021
slimanyd:


At times, I still wonder if these same pastors that do tell us to pray b4 marrying also does same o. Cos, its glaring these lady the pastor is about to marry is a hoe and a killer. Does it mean he did not see a clear vision or the vision is blur?

I tell you, I'm as confounded as you are. They're mostly fake pastors that see nada.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OLUPET009(m): 8:46pm On Dec 17, 2021
OnyeMmeri:


I tell you, I'm as confounded as you are. They're mostly fake pastors that see nada.
sorry bro, is not a fake Pastor
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Kobojunkie: 8:49pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
sorry bro, is not a fake Pastor
He is a fake pastor....all of them are. The fact is a real follower of Jesus Christ would never ask you your opinion of his mate to begin with. undecided
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Kobojunkie: 8:51pm On Dec 17, 2021
OnyeMmeri:
I tell you, I'm as confounded as you are. They're mostly fake pastors that see nada.
Contrary to what you have binged on, those who truly belong to God don't see these things. Na babalawos and soothsayer dey see things of this kind. undecided

Read the book of Hosea on what God is about instead.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OnyeMmeri: 8:52pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
sorry bro, is not a fake Pastor

Oh he's a real pastor then? undecided Yet can't see with his spiritual eyes that the lady he's about to spend the rest of his life with is nothing but a hoe and a murderer. Pathetic!
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Kobojunkie: 8:53pm On Dec 17, 2021
OnyeMmeri:
Oh he's a real pastor then? undecided Yet can't see with his spiritual eyes that the lady he's about to spend the rest of his life with is nothing but a hoe and a murderer. Pathetic!
Again, your "spiritual eyes" are of your babalawos and spiritualist who have nothing to do with the God of the people written of in scripture. undecided
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OnyeMmeri: 8:58pm On Dec 17, 2021
Kobojunkie:
Contrary to what you have binged on, those who truly belong to God don't see these things. Na babalawos and soothsayer dey see things of this kind. undecided

Read the book of Hosea on what God is about instead.

Yea, I agree. Moses, Elijah, Elisha, Hosea Daniel, Paul, etc, were all babalawos, dibias and soothsayers.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Kobojunkie: 9:02pm On Dec 17, 2021
OnyeMmeri:
Yea, I agree. Moses, Elijah, Elisha, Hosea Daniel, Paul, etc, were all babalawos, dibias and soothsayers.
Pay attention! undecided
OnyeMmeri:
Oh he's a real pastor then? undecided Yet can't see with his spiritual eyes that the lady he's about to spend the rest of his life with is nothing but a hoe and a murderer. Pathetic!
It is not God that gives the sight of the kind your babalawos and soothsayer have regaled you with.
Kobojunkie:
Again, your "spiritual eyes" are of your babalawos and spiritualist who have nothing to do with the God of the people written of in scripture. undecided
God is not a busy body that he will give sight into the life and walk of another human without cause that concerns His Kingdom. undecided

Jesus Christ promised His followers that they will see things concerning His Kingdom - not things concerning women, or even marriage, and their pasts etc. undecided
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Nobody: 9:24pm On Dec 17, 2021
Kobojunkie:
1. If OP chose to keep his friend in the dark when he was dating the lady while still friends with the pastor friend, then it was Op's decision to do that, not the gal to blame. undecided

A relationship, like a marriage, is between two individuals and no other person. So what happened between OP and this gal in that relationship is absolutely nobodies business, not even if the person is her gynecologist. That she had an abortion while with the OP is their personal issue and should be dealt with as such. No one outside of the relationship should even be privy to that information except the two guilty parties. undecided

2. When I was younger, the code used to be you don't kiss and tell. No matter what the trial here is, the OP shouldn't be going around telling anyone the details of his life with the lady in question. If she has taken to speaking of it with the pastor, that is on her. It is not the OP's place since the pastor was nor a part of the relationship he had with this woman. undecided

As for truth, that long tale of yours no enter at all. undecided

3. I don't see the world the way you do. From where I sit, there is nothing wrong with this lady having an abortion in her past. She has found herself a man she wants to marry and wants to marry her... it is that simple for me. You, on the other hand, are here attempting to complete this simple issue of relationships by suggesting that her past history of abortions has to be considered in her present decision and choice at happiness, something that makes no sense to me. undecided

And you speak of truth as though the pastor's past is not possibly filled with skeletons that might turn out worse in this. Look, if the pastor and the woman, both of them in their own relationship choose to open up about their pasts to each other, that is there choice to make. And after all,it is their relationship that is to to tested. However, a third-party like the Op has no business planting himself as relationship tester for the two. lipsrsealed

4. Kindly learn to leave God, the one who explained from the beginning to you, that a relationship, is an agreement between a man and a woman - no third-parties welcome - out of this foolishness, abeg! undecided

You don't know the meaning of a kiss and tell.
I am not concerned or condemning her for having an abortion if u can read but obviously u can't. So I wouldn't entertain ur stupidity any longer.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OLUPET009(m): 9:30pm On Dec 17, 2021
God works in a mysterious ways n we can't question Him
OnyeMmeri:


Oh he's a real pastor then? undecided Yet can't see with his spiritual eyes that the lady he's about to spend the rest of his life with is nothing but a hoe and a murderer. Pathetic!
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Kobojunkie: 9:34pm On Dec 17, 2021
killmods:
You don't know the meaning of a kiss and tell.
I am not concerned or condemning her for having an abortion if u can read but obviously u can't. So I wouldn't entertain ur stupidity any longer.
I don't know the meaning of "kiss and tell"? If you don't understand the meaning of that go check Google abeg! undecided

You claim you are not concerned about condemning her for having an abortion, so what truth are you overly concerned about here apart from the one revealed by the OP himself? undecided
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by OnyeMmeri: 9:38pm On Dec 17, 2021
Kobojunkie:
Pay attention! undecided It is not God that gives the sight of the kind your babalawos and soothsayer have regaled you with. God is not a busy body that he will give sight into the life and walk of another human without cause that concerns His Kingdom. undecided

Jesus Christ promised His followers that they will see things concerning His Kingdom - not things concerning women, or even marriage, and their pasts etc. undecided

What are you even on about? That God cannot reveal hidden things to people who truly serve Him if those things are unconnected to His Kingdom? Like seriously?!

I guess when God revealed to Elijah to go to the widow who fed him, it was connected to things of His kingdom? I guess when He revealed to prophet Samuel that king Saul had kept for himself things he plundered from a battle he fought, it was related to His kingdom, right? Etc.

Now, pay attention! When you are truly a servant of God, and you come to Him in prayer and tell Him to help you in choosing a godly wife, He reveals to you the right one that is free from history of abortion(murder). Because His thoughts for His children are always good.

You must be a Jehovah's witness with your skewed view of things.
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Kobojunkie: 9:57pm On Dec 17, 2021
OnyeMmeri:
1. What are you even on about? That God cannot reveal hidden things to people who truly serve Him if those things are unconnected to His Kingdom? Like seriously?!

2. I guess when God revealed to Elijah to go yo the widow who fed him, it was connected to thongs of His kingdom? I guess when He revealed to prophet Samuel that king Saul had kept for himself things he plundered from a battle he fought, it was related to His kingdom, right? Etc.

3. Now, pay attention! When you ate truly a servant of God, and ypu come to Him in prayer snd tell Him to help you in choosing a godly wife, He reveals to you thr right one.

4. You must be a Jehovah's witness with your skewed view of things.
1. Yes, we are called of Jesus Christ and Jesus Christ promised His disciples that they will see things regarding the Kingdom of God. undecided

2. First of all, the Kingdom of God is of the New Covenant and not the Old Covenant. The Old Covenant is instead of the Kingdom of Israel( & Judah) which only belongs to those who have the blood of Jacob flowing through their blood - Deuteronomy 30 vs 15 - 20 undecided

Second, 2 kings 4 vs 8 - 37, God didn't reveal to Elijah through sight to go see the shunamite woman. Also, since Saul was a King of the Kingdom of Israel so God sending Samuel to Him was as part of His Covenant with them. undecided

3. Wrong! There is no such thing as a godly wife or a Christian/godly marriage to begin with. This as Jesus Christ instead taught you that your marriages are of this world and not of His Kingdom - Luke 20 vs 34 - 36 and He also told you that marriage is not compulsory. God created some Eunuchs from birth, allowed some time be made Eunuchs in this life and others to become Eunuchs for the sake of His Kingdom - Matthew 19 vs 3 - 15.. undecided

What people claim to see - even unbelievers lay claim of having such sights of true love - is of their mind and not of God and His Kingdom. undecided

4. Don't further deceive yourself by thinking those who cling to that which is as written of scripture must be of the camp of those you have set as your enemy in this. undecided
Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by Adsexpert: 9:59pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
There is this lady we dated for like five months, before going out separate ways although we are still great friends. But before we started dating, there is a pastor friend (good) of mine who once ask out around March this year with the help of a senior Pastor who arrange the meeting between them, but she refuse giving some k-leg excuses. During the period of us been together, she took in but requested she aborted but I wasn't ok with it though. Just recently the Pastor friend call me and say they are getting along n preparing to marry her by next year. Wine has starting flying self. He even ask me of advise concerning the LADY. Meanwhile she is not aware that I know about their relationship. According to her she has dated three persons before me. Both of them are very close friends of mine. Should I tell Him the whole story And possibly save him or I should just close my mouth and watch how things play. I need mature advise please.


See chairman, that lady no get shame though, but no tell ur pastor friend yet , all you do is advise him to look out well well and shine eye sha and when saying this don't appear to serious or like any serious emotion is attached.

And number 2, no make this lady break your friendship bond , cus I bet you she will try do this 100% once she discover you guys are friends.

And 3, if u hear anything like say ur friend complain for the marriage peren in future , omo quickly burst casala oh and let ur friend no seh u no want spoil their joy earlier.. say na why u deh tell am make him shine him eye...

1 Like

Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by slickycee: 10:17pm On Dec 17, 2021
As you've shared your story here, we are judging you based on our individual principles, morals, experiences and wisdom.

But remember that it's God that would eventually judge you..

So in making important decisions, always try to seek God's wisdom and his laws
They're far more helpful than the human reasoning.
I don't have advice for you on the matter, but remember that karma must balance out itself.

All the best

1 Like

Re: Should I Tell Him, She Has Aborted For Me, I Need Advise Please. by revived2: 10:42pm On Dec 17, 2021
OLUPET009:
There is this lady we dated for like five months, before going out separate ways although we are still great friends. But before we started dating, there is a pastor friend (good) of mine who once ask out around March this year with the help of a senior Pastor who arrange the meeting between them, but she refuse giving some k-leg excuses. During the period of us been together, she took in but requested she aborted but I wasn't ok with it though. Just recently the Pastor friend call me and say they are getting along n preparing to marry her by next year. Wine has starting flying self. He even ask me of advise concerning the LADY. Meanwhile she is not aware that I know about their relationship. According to her she has dated three persons before me. Both of them are very close friends of mine. Should I tell Him the whole story And possibly save him or I should just close my mouth and watch how things play. I need mature advise please.

Leave them bro

If e wan burst make e no burst from your mouth

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