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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? (1696 Views)
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He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 12:36pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
So, I've got this close friend, he's a real nice guy and easy going, but he has this really weird girlfriend. She is not a bad person, but she has these problems: Extreme jealousy and Anger. Her Anger and jealousy is top notch. Permit me to tell you some of her extremely crazy actions due to jealousy: Firstly, she has Binoculars. This is no jokes. She literally has a pair of binoculars that she uses to view him from a distance just to make sure she can monitor him. Secondly, she literally has people she paid to monitor his movement, both at his workplace and back home. Thirdly, she has tapped his phone, which means she can know everyone he is talking to. Fourthly, she installed a tracker in his phone and car without him knowing. She calls him like every 30 minutes of the day, and will always ask for a video chat so she will confirm who he is with. At first, he found her attitude to be cute, and even thought she was just trying to be a caring girlfriend that is protecting her 'property', but now e be like say water don pass garri. She has fought every of his female friends and she's in the habit of replying ANY female that dares comment on any picture he uploads on Social media. She fought his boss, who also happens to be a female. Now, here's the main thing. My friend is planning to propose to her(I wonder why) on Dec. 31st/1st of January 2022. He wants to propose at the exact moment (12:00am) when everyone will be shouting "HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!" He bought her a real expensive ring. Then, he invited his godmother and some of us over. The plan was to meet so we can plan the main event properly without her(the girlfriend) knowing. All in a bid to surprise her. So, the godmother and i got there first, but she came before me. He went downstairs to meet her; hugged her, and was showing her the ring he wants to use for proposal. Out of no where, this his girlfriend ran downstairs with FULL FORCE. I guess she was viewing him with her Binoculars. She started yelling and accusing him of having and proposing marriage to a sugar mommy. She didn't even wait for any explanation before she started raining all sorts of derogatory words and insults on this woman. She tore parts of her dress and called her an old hag, a prostitute, boyfriend snatcher, etc. She slapped this woman o. The guy got very angry and he pushed her, this girl pulled out a small kitchen knife she hid in her back pocket while coming downstairs and stabbed his hand o. Yes, she stabbed him. The whole thing felt like a Nollywood movie. I could not believe my eyes. I've seen her angry severally, but this was the icing on the cake. The whole estate was shook, because she kept running helter skelter while YELLING, cursing and destroying properties. Several people had to come out before we could tame her, and then take the guy to a clinic. The godmother didn't utter a single word, and she simply left. Till now, nobody has been able to reach her(the godmother). Now, after some of the family members have called the girl, she is now convinced that the woman is actually his godmother, and not a sugar mommy. She is sober now and wants forgiveness, whereas the guy has said he doesn't want again. Here are my questions: When you see your guy or your lady with another person that's of the opposite gender in public, what's the best way to handle the situation? Do you approach them with anger? Do you simply call your partner to the side to ask 'who is the girl/guy you're talking to?' Do you simply wait for your partner to finish, so he/she will come and explain to you what's going on? I already told him I support his decision to cancel the proposal and end the relationship, but this girl is actually a really nice girl, it's just her anger and jealousy that is the problem. That's the ONLY issue with her. Should he help her work on her anger issues before thinking of marriage or he should just end the relationship? Lalasticlala Dominique OAM4J abeg come put mouth for this matter o |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Szilard: 12:39pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
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Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by itsme01: 12:42pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
![]() Every thing has solution... I believe she's immature and impulsive.. Good news is that it's a curable disease and she can be saved at a cheap price, bad news is she might not want to go through with it To the Solution; Talk to her that she must take a complete Anger management class with a clinical psychologist at a state teaching hospital, a general Hospital or Crestcare.ng for descreet home service... I prefer Crestcare.ng cos it's home service, and it's once a week for 3 months .. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 12:45pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
itsme01:Man of God, please explain further. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by itsme01: 12:49pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Biggie2000: Talk to her that she must take a complete Anger management class with a qualified clinical psychologist at a state teaching hospital, a general Hospital or Crestcare.ng for descreet home service... I prefer Crestcare.ng cos it's home service, and it's once a week for 3 months.. Shameful part would be the cause might be an unrelated event that happened to her a long time ago, the triggers might also be the guys body language, and lastly she might get some anxiety drugs and management techniques |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Shellsploit: 12:53pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
The kain gender sef ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by apasino01: 12:58pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
The Story Get as e be sha Is she working with the FBI ?? How was she able to gain access to the extent of bugging the guy’s phone?? To be reading texts and checking call conversations. She be hacker? Anyways he should run for his life. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 1:01pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
itsme01:Bro, they have taken her to so many psychotherapists. I even suggested she's taken to a rehabilitation center to complete a 3-month anger management course sef. She said she will only go, if the guy comes with her. It's like there is an ignition that occurs in her brain, the moment she sees her boyfriend interacting with a female. But, I'll still pass down this your suggestions sha |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by LilMissFavvy(f): 1:09pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
No matter the level of annoyance no one is supposed to pick a knife because of anger ![]() |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 1:10pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
itsme01:This part literally crossed my mind, because I know how hard trust issues are. But, this guy she's dating is a complete introvert. All he does is work, relax at home, and watch movies. He's antisocial. Even if she has experienced some heartbreak in the past, does that mean she should start acting crazy now that she met a calm guy? |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Drambo: 1:11pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
As far as he don Bleep her. Make he go marry another person. But if he never Bleep her make he try Bleep her first then dump her angry ass 1 Like |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Nobody: 1:11pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
OP... Anger and extreme jealousy cannot be classified as "only"... People have done unimaginable things as a result of those character defects... And truth be told, her case is damn serious!! Imagine going to the extent of tapping into his phone, installing a tracker in his car and getting a binoculars, and now attacking him with a knife, all because she saw him with a ring in the presence of another woman likeeeee... I feel the guy was right to call off the whole thing and sincerely I wouldn't advice him to go back to her, I for one wouldn't want to be 10feet near her ![]() 1 Like |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 1:12pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
apasino01:Lol. It's not so hard to do, as long as you know the right people with the computer knowledge. It's only money that it will cost you. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by itsme01: 1:14pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Biggie2000: For a fact that her anger still makes her black out and she preplanned the stabbing of the guy by hiding a knife... That's more than impulse , that's premeditated. At this point if I was your friend I will only give her just one single opurtunity and pending the completion of the project we shall be separated and pause the relationship . 1 Like |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Freestainworld(m): 1:16pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Let him drop that girl before entering 2022, it will be his biggest achievement of this yr. 2 Likes |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by neoG(f): 1:17pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
You are here asking for suggestions or what? When you should take your friend to church thanking God for a mighty deliverance. If he is leaving that relationship, he should not only run away for the meantime emotionally but also physically. Because the next girl she will be dating is an endangered specie. Let him not end this his young life behind bars for what he did not commit cos that lady is capable of anything. 2 Likes |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 1:18pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
LilMissFavvy:Exactly. But, the issue now is that she is aware the guy wants to propose. She might agree to take therapy, counseling, prayers, etc and pretend through out, just so she will get the ring. Then, after marriage, she will continue. Marriage is a VERY serious step, and leaving it may seem impossible at times, especially when kids are now involved. The problem now is how to be convinced that she's fully changed, even after counselling and therapy. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 1:22pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Freestainworld:Thank you o. I will even make sure he takes the girl to a police station, so she will write statement that she will avoid him. He must get a restraining order against her. 1 Like |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by daddytime(m): 1:23pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Lol... At first, he found her attitude to be cute, and even thought she was just trying to be a caring girlfriend that is protecting her 'property', The bolded is the funniest part of the story. Your friend is dealing with a psychotic individual. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 1:25pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Drambo:Lol, so that she will turn him to another Ojukwu Ataga abi? But, they've been together for over a year now, so I'm sure they've done the do. daddytime:Lol, it's a very crazy situation. Her mood swing is on another level. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by LilMissFavvy(f): 1:35pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
If she is a wise woman, the embarrassing occurrence she caused would be enough to make her learn a lesson and change forever, talk more of adding counselling to it. I honestly do not know if she is wise enough to learn. Your friend should see the whole thing as a risk. Either to take the risk of standing by her, or he ends the relationship. Biggie2000: |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 1:37pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
neoG:Hahaha, you dey burst my head, comrade. Even me sef, i'm an endangered specie. I pray say make she no find me come house. I have instructed my gateman to be alert, I have switched off my main phone and also locked the doors to my place. But, you're speaking facts though. I find her really obsessive. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 1:46pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
LilMissFavvy:Na better girl o, but her anger can just make her display anywhere, even if Queen Elizabeth queen is there. It's like one spirit just takes control of her when she's angry, and immediately she's done being angry, she will now start smiling and acting like an angel that can't hurt a fly. No offense, but if the guy was your brother, what would you advice him to do? (2) If you were the girl, would you advice your boyfriend to just end the marriage or he should give you time to get better help? Please, don't be offended by my questions. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by soundOsonic: 1:51pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
When they want you to believe their story, they always use this term "it was like Nollywood movie" This story na...
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Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by neoG(f): 1:54pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Better. Just stay away like you said and save your head. One of the biggest signs before you consider one as a friend is if such persons makes conscious effort to want to right their wrongs because no one even ME is good or perfect. But where I was shocked in your story is when this lady knows that she has issues but not consciously willing to fight it to become better but waiting for your friend to follow her. She needs serious help. Between am a woman ooo. Biggie2000: |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 2:00pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
[s] soundOsonic:[/s]
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Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by soundOsonic: 2:02pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Biggie2000:He pain you o.
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Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 2:05pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
soundOsonic:Lol, stop being mischievous, this is actually a real stuff. There's time to troll, and time to be serious. |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by soundOsonic: 2:13pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Biggie2000: Seriously reason am na A lady uses binoculars to spy on her boyfriend from a distance She hacked into his phone to read his chats She tap into the bf for to listen to all his calls And a guy wants to happily propose to this kind of lady. She uses binoculars to spy on innocent boyfriend when he was showing off the ring. Is it through the window or is the house translucent? Abeg getout with your cock and bull story. Anyone believing this is dumb. 1 Like |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by Biggie2000(m): 2:13pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
neoG:I guess it's just obsession. The place she's being referred to is at another state, and they won't allow her go out as she wants. They want to monitor her, whereas she wants to monitor her boyfriend. So crazy! Between am a woman oooLol, yes I'm very much aware you're a lady. 'Comrade' is a gender-neutral title. ![]() |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by tayo60(f): 2:13pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
Let him not make the mistake of marrying her, or else, your guy na gonna. She will definitely kill him in the marriage. Let her go with all her troubles o |
Re: He Canceled The Proposal. Good Or Bad Move? by LilMissFavvy(f): 2:16pm On Dec 31, 2021 |
If I was the girl I would appologise to him, and handover myself to get all possible help, then go back to him. If the guy was my brother I would have given him same advice as above. I would also look for ways to monitor her to see if she's ready to get help. If I see any red flag, I tell him to quit. From the comments above, it's like majority of people here say he should end the relationship, from your comments above, your instincts says your friend should end it. So go with the majority ![]() Biggie2000: |
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