SamReinvented:
Abeg, what’s the latest on DVLA delays? Is the situation better now? I intend to travel out in the next 2 months or so, and I want to send my BRP for driver’s license. Make the thing no go hang ooo.

AirBay:
@Lexusgs430 what do you think of vanguardinvestor? Any experience with them?

Viruses:


I will take it that you haven't understood the rental terms.

12 months or 6 months contract means you will sign that you will stay in the apartment for 12 or 6 months respectively. However, you pay rent monthly or weekly. So if the house rent is £500, you sign 12/6 months contract but you'll be paying £500 monthly or about £125 weekly.

You will deduct the deposit from your first month's payment if you eventually get the apartment.

If you can mention the payments in your etc, further clarification will be provided.

Aprokodaughter:
Una just they repeat what people have said already since last night.

midasfx:
Hi everyone,

Silent follower on here for a while. The advise I have come across on this platform has been immense through out the entire process.

We came into the UK(Gillingham, Kent to be precise ) on the 1st of January, only issue I have go so far is getting accommodation in Gillingham, Kent.

I need advise from folks who are familiar with Kent on recommendation of other areas that I can look into for accommodation(wife is schooling at University of Kent, Medway campus).

Thank you.

marylandcakes:



I trade with them and they are very good in my opinion. Their fees are reasonable.

SamReinvented:


False equivalence. It’s his OWN mum. No one is stopping her from giving her mum money too. But that obligation shouldn’t be on her husband. Abeg.

Aprokodaughter:
Una just they repeat what people have said already since last night.

dupyshoo:
My obligation is both to my parents and my spouse parents. We give them money as a family. They don't know who is giving them the money. So, if the wife is at home taking care of the kids and not earning money, her parents should not be taken care of. Let's be fair!!

However, currently they are not in the position to be giving parents money. They should sort themselves out first.

Aprokodaughter:
Una just they repeat what people have said already since last night.

Funky123:


Everyone has an opinion and people don't come to Nairaland same time, 10 people might have quoted the post and I won't know because I started reading from the page I stopped.

wonlasewonimi:
This country will shake you to the core as an immigrant, it could make you or mar you! @babajeje, this student journey will test you at every stage to the point of giving up on everything that matters to you. This is from 19 years experience!

Read my lips - You cant be sending money to anyone whilst you're still finding your feet. Your wife needs to work to understand why the pounds have a surname called sterling. You guys have to work together in order to get a chance of success. Get yourself a blood pressure monitor too. A word is enough for the wise!

elisinho:


Can you put me on how to get a provisional license please?

justwise:


The husband is not under any obligation to do that.

Talking about fairness.. is she sending money to her mother or father Inlaw?

marylandcakes:


Gillingham is not a very nice area, it will be better to look around other nearby areas.

fatima04:


The husband is not under any obligation to send money but if he can afford it then he should and depending on their family dynamics.

Once they both got married their families were joined together. The fairness statement was referring to if the wife isn't working and the husband completely ignores her family side just because he isn't obligated to.

Also, there are things spouses for the husband/in-law family as well asides money which needs to be reciprocated.

harwe:
Welldone guys...

Please where is the best place or link for someone to buy a car in UK..

Any other link aside ebay?

midasfx:


Just seeing this. Where do you suggest I look at please? Thanks.

IcecoldDon:
Thanks Bro. I have seen here something concerning the energy rating as A to D was considered good, so that was what I was a bit vague about. Also the 2 older kids will be 3 and 6 by April, will they both have to wait till September to get into school or is there any kind of unofficial school program for such kids that just came into the country. I have heard a lot of good things about catholic schools as well and will check them out based on your recommendations.

Chreze:


Cool bro. I was hoping we will get a crypto tread so that we don’t derail this as I don’t know if this is acceptable here. But I will just keep it brief and ask that I am permitted.

Aprokodaughter:
Una just they repeat what people have said already since last night.

rcdesign:
Good Evening All,

Please i am going to Stirling University and i have a couple of questions to enable take appropriate decision on location of accommodation;

1. Are there job opportunities in Stirling
2. Should i rent an accommodation in Edinburgh or Glasgow (or any other commercial hub) for better job opportunities. Is this feasible putting transportation into consideration.

Thanks.

babajeje123:
This is a personal issue that is bothering me. I have decided to post it here with the hope that I would get matured advise here. Besides, people on this platform would be able to advise better since most live in the UK.

I

babajeje123:
This is a personal issue that is bothering me. I have decided to post it here with the hope that I would get matured advise here. Besides, people on this platform would be able to advise better since most live in the UK.

I came to the UK last year on student's visa for a 2 year programme. it was challenging upon arrival because the country was on lock down and getting a job was not a walk in the park. When I got one, I had to work many hours during holiday period to pay the debt I owed and also to bring in my family (2 kids + wife). I had to pay for quarantine accommodation because I wanted them to come in December. I got a 2 bed, furnished it, bought other items to make life at least a bit better for my wife. However, she is not appreciative and I am beginning to regret bringing her.

When she arrived, we were all over each other, probably because we've missed each other and all of that. I just noticed that her attitude started changing. I had an idea of what could have brought a change of mood but I didn't want to guess. May be a week after her arrival, I told her about my plan to bring in my mum in April - May so she can help with the kids so that both of us can work as much as we want, knowing fully well that she too will do her masters come next year. She told me it was okay and she had nothing against it. So today, I told her that I would be sending money to my mum by month end so she can starts apply for her passport. She kept quiet for some seconds and said okay. Then, she began to tell me how I always make decisions without carrying her along and how I always kick when she has something better. Then I asked her to gave an instance. She said back at home, she had a certain amount she was giving to her mum every month which she suspended when I was planning to come. She went ahead to tell me that I never gave her mother anything except on few instances since we got married. And then she said, 'what is your plan for my mummy?'

I told her that during the time I was unable to give to her mum, I didn't have and I wasn't even giving to my mum too. However, in December when she with the kids, my mum and her sister were on their way to the airport, I sent 20k to her and sent a message that she should give the sister to help me give her mum as Christmas money. I made it clear that she raised the issue because of my plan for my mum and she denied it. Meanwhile, her mum has a daughter in the UK with her husband. They have tried to bring her in on 2 occasions last year but she was denied. So I told her that we can't bring her mum in now because Home office might think we are desperate and place her on a 10 year ban. She would not have any of my explanations. She just withdrew into her shell.

I left where we were to the room and thought about all my struggle in bringing her and felt terrible. I was wondering if this is not the same woman I told that I worked 21 nights and was still going to lectures from work in order to raise money for their travel. I worked in a food processing company (you can imagine the cold), laundry etc to bring them in. I know the matter has not died and she would still raise it and it may lead to a big fight. We have had the discussion before at home and it led to a terrible fight. Now this. Let me quickly chip it in that when she came and we talked about money for family projects, she initially said each of us should keep our money and contribute a certain percent. The reason she made the suggestion was that she might want to give her mother money and for personal stuff which I may not agree to her dipping hands into family purse. I told her that contributing a quota might not work because of all the things we desire to achieve this year. I told her that what can work is to take a certain amount from her weekly earning for her mum and personal stuff and putting the remaining into the family account and I will also do likewise. She agreed to the suggestion.

Please, how do I handle this matter? I don't want fight because I have a lot to do and I tell you her words can make the meekest man on earth to misbehave. In my life, I have never thought of divorce or separation, but it came to my mind today after the discussion. In fact, I am beginning to look for a job that would take me far away from home as it appears as if we appreciate each other when we are apart.

Now, I can't concentrate on my ICAs. I just hate it when people are trying to manipulate me. It's so painful if you are dealing with someone who doesn't appreciate your efforts. Yesterday, I gave her 85GBP for her DBS. Before she left home, she complained around October that she wanted to change her wardrobe, I sent money. Getting here, she told me she can't be wearing those clothes, I gave her 100GBP. I gave my card details to add on her phone account for data all in a bid to make her happy and for us to have a peaceful home which we didn't have in Naija because of lack of resources.

See, the kind of advise I need is what to do not to give too much attention to her. Suggesting that I should have a heart-to-heart talk with her won't work because it has never worked. It always leads to heated argument and insults. I won't mind if someone can recommend a good marriage counselor.

Please, I didn't post this for likes and shares. Na solution I dey find abeg

bolagabriella:


First i would say I'm a lady

I really don't know how you want to balance it but whatever decision you make should not be at the detriment of your parents.
I see situations where husbands because of the pressure from theire wives satisfy their wives's family needs first thinking they can then satisfy their own parent's needs later...but most times it doesn't work cos the wife will keep on asking and asking for her own family not thinking once about the husband's family.
In marriage, we are suppose to take our husband's family as ours and vice versa. What we can do to our parents are what we should do for our spouse's parents.
I'm aware of someone close to me whose wife did not allow him to bring his mother, a woman that suffered for him to become who he is, till the woman died. This is wickedness on some women's part.
My husband happened to send money to his mother for this festive without informing me and i didn't feel bad about it when it was brought to my notice. It's his mother, she deserve it. I didn't even care about the amount. When i was going to meet my parents for the festive, he didn't give me anything to give to my folks. I just informed him i will be giving my folks some cash out of his money that is with me, and he said no wahala. I know my husband loves my family and i love his family also.
We need to understand this thing is not a competition. Who gets the care first?
Who gets the car first?
Who receives the highest stipend?
Who comes abroad first?
All we should try to achieve is balance for both sides.
We should learn to accept our spouse's parents as our own and learn to be accomodating.

I pray God gives us all the wisdom to ensure peace in our homes.

Ugool:
Good evening everyone. I and my spouse is looking for accomodation in Liverpool. This accomodation thingy is very tedious. We have used zipoola and open rent but the terms are crazy; Paying for 12months min some 6 with additional bills like unrefundable deposit etc. Please if anyone has Futher genuine recommendations or knows a landlord subletting a 1 bedroom or studio kindly let me know. Thank you

LagosismyHome:


Not every Nigerian woman is like this .... if only

Aprokodaughter:
Una just they repeat what people have said already since last night.