Hello guys,

I came across below writeup online, I feel this write up is educating and very interesting and at the same time controversial to some people especially our Nigerian feminist if they would read in between the lines.

The writer says it is the full responsibility of a husband to take care of his wife and foot all her bills even if the woman is more richer than the man. He defined husband to be the head of the house and a provider. The definition was okay by me if only our Nigerian feminist would understand that a man is the head of the house and should be in total submission to her husband, there would be minimal divorce cases. Please read on and say your mind.





I was discussing with some guy recently and he was explaining to me how he had to force his wife to officially share the family's financial responsibilities with him. According to him, "she cannot just sit there and not be contributing her own quota, I'm not her father!".

Personally, I don't think it's out of place for a woman to contribute to the financial responsibilities in her own home, however, i do have a problem with this guy's mentality and i didn't hesitate to bare my thoughts to him.

You have to understand that prior to marrying your undeserving ass, this woman has always been catered for by her own parents, without having to share the bills with them. This is because her parents considered her their own responsibility.

When you went to take her away from her parents care in the name of marriage, you promised and convinced them you'd take care of her properly which is why they even released her to you at all. You married her to be completely responsible FOR HER and not to share responsibilities WITH HER!

Get this into your head 'husband'!

The financial responsibilities of your family is entirely yours to shoulder 100%, anything else she brings is merely an adjunct! THIS IS ALL YOUR JOB!

When you call yourself husband sometimes, have you ever cared to find out what it even means? In the Bible It's the greek word "kurios" which means "Lord, owner, ruler, protector, PROVIDER".

Oga you're her provider ooo!!!

I've never had to ask my wife, "how much do you have there for us to execute so and so project or pay so and so bills?". It just doesn't work that way in my head. All that's in my head is that 'THIS IS MY JOB!'

Of course there are times she's had to bring some money to contribute to a few things here and there but it wasn't something i was looking out for or even expecting at all!

Even in the English dictionary definition of 'Husband'; as a noun it means "The master of a house; the head of a family; A tiller of the ground".

I hope you're seeing the very sensitive words used here? A tiller of the ground?? Oga na you suppose dey work!

As a verb the word 'Husband' means "To assume the care of or responsibility for". There's no joke in this sir!

I mean men these days just take people's daughters to wife, expecting to enjoy all the services, honour, respect, etc, without identifying what exactly their own role in the union is.

In 1Tim. 5:8, the bible says, "The man that dosen't PROVIDE for his own, especially his own family, has denounced the Christian faith and is worse than an unbeliever! (Paraphrased).

I give my wife money, i buy her things, i mean i take care of her 100%. And almost all the time she says "thank you babe" but I reluctantly respond with" you're welcome". For the most part, she feels uncomfortable with that and I'm like, "this is my job babe".

This is just how it is for me!

The truth is that by default i don't even expect to hear the 'thank you' from her, I don't look out for it. Me taking care of my wife isn't dependent on whether or not she appreciated the last thing i did for her, because i wasn't expecting an appreciation to begin with.

After all when God was speaking to husbands in Eph. 5:25, He didn't say "husbands love your wives only when they appreciate you", No! He said, "Husbands love your wives..." period! There was no conditionality attached. So to me, that's my job and I'm doing it. It's always been that way in my head, even when we were still dating.

My wife likes Apples, i buy them for her almost everyday on my way back from work. Even if she annoys me in the morning before i leave for work, and she does sometimes, I'll still buy it for her on my way back so long i see the vendors in traffic.

I don't try to mentally analyse whether or not she deserves it or not before buying it for her because being 'my wife' alone automatically qualifies her for everything good thing i can afford. Asuch, caring for her and being 100% responsible for her is my job!

'Husband', you cannot be hanging out with friends eating choice meals and ordering the best drinks yet your wife is at home and dosen't even know what those kinda stuff tastes like, otherwise whoever raised you did a very poor job!

'Husband', you cannot be giving side chick an amount of money that your wife hasn't touched, you're not mad!

'Husband', you cannot be sitting down in that house and she's turning on generator for you when there's a power outage or she's answering the door when there's a knock. You're also her protector sir, don't forget that!

Husbands have to start doing better in 2023! This is the only way we can raise responsible son's, and daughters too, who'll be the worthy examples that we all will be proud of tomorrow.

I think I've said enough!

Cheers!✍️

Copied


Source: https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=4785192298235286&id=100002336881350

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What worked for Mr A might not work for Mr B.

Marriage these days is looking like charade..

BORING!!

I didn't read it.

siofra:
BORING!!

I didn't read it.

At least try and be happy for others..

Life is too beautiful

This one na to whom it may concern

Na so
We no wan hear story that touches the husband after u marry.

Issokay!!!

Nice write up OP...
Though I don't agree with a few things you said, buh I won't list it cause it won't be in accordance with the topic of the thread...

However sir...
I have a few questions...
In the Greek word for the word husband, "kurios", one of the translation is "owner", would you say a husband "owns" his wife?? Would it be safe to say that a wife is a property of her husband that have been bought for a price?!

In the dictionary meaning of the word husband, it meant "master of the house", then I ask, if the master isn't treated like a master, should he play the role of a master?

Nice write up chief...
I await a thread on "the true meaning of wife"...

Favfables1:
Nice write up OP...
Though I don't agree with a few things you said, buh I won't list it cause it won't be in accordance with the topic of the thread...

However sir...
I have a few questions...
In the Greek word for the word husband, "kurios", one of the translation is "owner", would you say a husband "owns" his wife?? Would it be safe to say that a wife is a property of her husband that have been bought for a price?!

In the dictionary meaning of the word husband, it meant "master of the house", then I ask, if the master isn't treated like a master, should he play the role of a master?

Nice write up chief...
I await a thread on "the true meaning of wife"...

Thanks for your compliments.

One must not be a property before you own them. Remember you a pay a bride price on your wife which automaticaly makes you her owner.

The writeup says you should still love your wife even she doesn't regarded you as master. Love changes everything with time.

marshalcarter:
This one na to whom it may concern

ah swear guy

Salesagents:


Thanks for your compliments.

One must not be a property before you own them. Remember you a pay a bride price on your wife which automaticaly makes you her owner.

The writeup says you should still love your wife even she doesn't regarded you as master. Love changes everything with time.

Good answer

Mamijoh:
Good answer

Thanks

The write up reeks of so many unbalanced assumptions;

You said the husband is expected to love the wife, true, you conveniently forgot same bible expects the wives to submit their husbands. Total submission includes everything about you, no reservations. Your name, body, INCOME, future etc. The Bible did not say, submit where you find it convenient. The man is commanded to love, the woman is commanded to submit. God knows it’s impossible to love an insubordinate woman.

God is never an author of confusion. It’s you who choose to leave a part of scriptures without the corresponding to get a balance view. A woman who has submitted her all has nothing to give again. And only a fool will love her less. A man who has loved a woman who has not also submitted fully has simply loved a fool, vice versa. It’s a balanced expectation, love completely, submit completely.

INFACT, to further buttress, the command to submit comes first before the command to love. Eph 5:22-23, wives submit yourselves unto your husbands as unto the lord. For the husband is the HEAD of the wife. It’s clear after God, it’s your husband. Not even your father and mother as a woman. This is God’s intention for marriage. Vs25: Husbands love your wives even as Christ loves the church. Obviously vs 22 comes before 25.

When a woman starts saying, it’s MY MONEY, she has not submitted her finances. She only chose to submit in convenient areas, that’s not God’s design. A good and submissive woman will table her finance before her lord, her husband and seek his guidance and counsel. You don’t go spend without his counsel simply because your earned it, or how is that submission. My brother the Bible is complete. Don’t lift a verse out of context.

So mr writer, just because you choose to justify your obvious lack of leadership in all the affairs of your marriage and it’s working for you does not mean it would work for others. You don’t expect appreciation from your wife is your own cup of alomo bitters. God expects appreciations how much more men! Reason Jesus asked for the rest nine, after only one out of ten healed came back to appreciate!! what works for A might not work for B ultimately.

princeeze1:
The write up reeks of so many unbalanced assumptions;

You said the husband is expected to love the wife, true, you conveniently forgot same bible expects the wives to submit their husbands. Total submission includes everything about you, no reservations. Your name, body, INCOME, future etc. The Bible did not say, submit where you find it convenient. The man is commanded to love, the woman is commanded to submit. God knows it’s impossible to love an insubordinate woman.

God is never an author of confusion. It’s you who choose to leave a part of scriptures without the corresponding to get a balance view. A woman who has submitted her all has nothing to give again. And only a fool will love her less. A man who has loved a woman who has not also submitted fully has simply loved a fool, vice versa. It’s a balanced expectation, love completely, submit completely.

INFACT, to further buttress, the command to submit comes first before the command to love. Eph 5:22-23, wives submit yourselves unto your husbands as unto the lord. For the husband is the HEAD of the wife. It’s clear after God, it’s your husband. Not even your father and mother as a woman. This is God’s intention for marriage. Vs25: Husbands love your wives even as Christ loves the church. Obviously vs 22 comes before 25.

When a woman starts saying, it’s MY MONEY, she has not submitted her finances. She only chose to submit in convenient areas, that’s not God’s design. A good and submissive woman will table her finance before her lord, her husband and seek his guidance and counsel. You don’t go spend without his counsel simply because your earned it, or how is that submission. My brother the Bible is complete. Don’t lift a verse out of context.

So mr writer, just because you choose to justify your obvious lack of leadership in all the affairs of your marriage and it’s working for you does not mean it would work for others. You don’t expect appreciation from your wife is your own cup of alomo bitters. God expects appreciations how much more men! Reason Jesus asked for the rest nine, after only one out of ten healed came back to appreciate!! what works for A might not work for B ultimately.

Can't you prove your points without bringing your bible huh?prove it from a general view not one sided...not everyone on here is of your faith..

FERNANDEZISBACK:

Can't you prove your points without bringing your bible huh?prove it from a general view not one sided...not everyone on here is of your faith..

You jumped in to quote me without reading the original post in other to sound socially correct. Because if you had read the original post, you would have seen the poster used the bible and same verse, but only lifted a portion of it. I merely brought out the complete story line of what that same portion of the Bible actually meant or implied.

princeeze1:

You jumped in to quote me without reading the original post in other to sound socially correct. Because if you had read the original post, you would have seen the poster used the bible and same verse, but only lifted a portion of it. I merely brought out the complete story line of what that same portion of the Bible actually meant or implied.

Don't you think it'd been great if you proved that point without bible?
As I said your point is supposed to be understood not directed at a particular faith..

FERNANDEZISBACK:

Don't you think it'd been great if you proved that point without bible?
As I said your point is supposed to be understood not directed at a particular faith..

True…
Socially speaking, marriage is a CIVIL PARTNERSHIP, hence if it’s no longer tenable, you go your separate ways as no one is slave unto the other, rather partners in progress, non was intended to slave for the other, it is not intended to be parasitic. The world over recognizes it so. No where except Africa do you find a woman working and expecting to keep her finances 100% while the man slaves himself. It’s not about poverty mentality, else you would say someone like Jzzy $ Beyoncé is poor! They have even gone ahead to begin pre nuptials in other to protect finances from parasitic leeches. It’s only in Africa that you see men twisting the scenario using religion that was brought to us by same whites who treats marriage as a partnership.

princeeze1:
The write up reeks of so many unbalanced assumptions;

You said the husband is expected to love the wife, true, you conveniently forgot same bible expects the wives to submit their husbands. Total submission includes everything about you, no reservations. Your name, body, INCOME, future etc. The Bible did not say, submit where you find it convenient. The man is commanded to love, the woman is commanded to submit. God knows it’s impossible to love an insubordinate woman.

God is never an author of confusion. It’s you who choose to leave a part of scriptures without the corresponding to get a balance view. A woman who has submitted her all has nothing to give again. And only a fool will love her less. A man who has loved a woman who has not also submitted fully has simply loved a fool, vice versa. It’s a balanced expectation, love completely, submit completely.

INFACT, to further buttress, the command to submit comes first before the command to love. Eph 5:22-23, wives submit yourselves unto your husbands as unto the lord. For the husband is the HEAD of the wife. It’s clear after God, it’s your husband. Not even your father and mother as a woman. This is God’s intention for marriage. Vs25: Husbands love your wives even as Christ loves the church. Obviously vs 22 comes before 25.

When a woman starts saying, it’s MY MONEY, she has not submitted her finances. She only chose to submit in convenient areas, that’s not God’s design. A good and submissive woman will table her finance before her lord, her husband and seek his guidance and counsel. You don’t go spend without his counsel simply because your earned it, or how is that submission. My brother the Bible is complete. Don’t lift a verse out of context.

So mr writer, just because you choose to justify your obvious lack of leadership in all the affairs of your marriage and it’s working for you does not mean it would work for others. You don’t expect appreciation from your wife is your own cup of alomo bitters. God expects appreciations how much more men! Reason Jesus asked for the rest nine, after only one out of ten healed came back to appreciate!! what works for A might not work for B ultimately.

I couldn't have said it any better...
His write up is unbalanced and one sided...
But let's just wait and see...
Maybe he'll create another thread to balance things up

princeeze1:

True…
Socially speaking, marriage is a CIVIL PARTNERSHIP, hence if it’s no longer tenable, you go your separate ways as no one is slave unto the other, rather partners in progress, non was intended to slave for the other, it is not intended to be parasitic. The world over recognizes it so. No where except Africa do you find a woman working and expecting to keep her finances 100% while the man slaves himself. It’s not about poverty mentality, else you would say someone like Jzzy $ Beyoncé is poor! They have even gone ahead to begin pre nuptials in other to protect finances from parasitic leeches. It’s only in Africa that you see men twisting the scenario using religion that was brought to us by same whites who treats marriage as a partnership.

Thanks for your contribution..now your point is well understood.. thank you..

princeeze1:
The write up reeks of so many unbalanced assumptions;

You said the husband is expected to love the wife, true, you conveniently forgot same bible expects the wives to submit their husbands. Total submission includes everything about you, no reservations. Your name, body, INCOME, future etc. The Bible did not say, submit where you find it convenient. The man is commanded to love, the woman is commanded to submit. God knows it’s impossible to love an insubordinate woman.

God is never an author of confusion. It’s you who choose to leave a part of scriptures without the corresponding to get a balance view. A woman who has submitted her all has nothing to give again. And only a fool will love her less. A man who has loved a woman who has not also submitted fully has simply loved a fool, vice versa. It’s a balanced expectation, love completely, submit completely.

INFACT, to further buttress, the command to submit comes first before the command to love. Eph 5:22-23, wives submit yourselves unto your husbands as unto the lord. For the husband is the HEAD of the wife. It’s clear after God, it’s your husband. Not even your father and mother as a woman. This is God’s intention for marriage. Vs25: Husbands love your wives even as Christ loves the church. Obviously vs 22 comes before 25.

When a woman starts saying, it’s MY MONEY, she has not submitted her finances. She only chose to submit in convenient areas, that’s not God’s design. A good and submissive woman will table her finance before her lord, her husband and seek his guidance and counsel. You don’t go spend without his counsel simply because your earned it, or how is that submission. My brother the Bible is complete. Don’t lift a verse out of context.

So mr writer, just because you choose to justify your obvious lack of leadership in all the affairs of your marriage and it’s working for you does not mean it would work for others. You don’t expect appreciation from your wife is your own cup of alomo bitters. God expects appreciations how much more men! Reason Jesus asked for the rest nine, after only one out of ten healed came back to appreciate!! what works for A might not work for B ultimately.

I suggest you read the write up again with an open mind.

The writer didn't say wife should not submit her finances but he was saying it is not right to ask your wife to contribute to family needs except she willingly does that which is part of submission. But forcing your wife to make contributions on something that is totally your responsibility defiles the true meaning of a husband.

Please google the meaning of Husband please.

Thanks.

Salesagents:


I suggest you read the write up again with an open mind.

The writer didn't say wife should not submit her finances but he was saying it is not right to ask your wife to contribute to family needs except she willingly does that which is part of submission. But forcing your wife to make contributions on something that is totally your responsibility defiles the true meaning of a husband.

Please google the meaning of Husband please.

Thanks.

In trying to sound socially correct, you ended up not making sense. Using the writer’s biblical analogy, is submission a thing of choice and preference? You cannot force a person who has already submitted, it’s simple logic, hence submission was demanded before love. It’s either you are submissive or you are not. Same way it’s either he is loving or not. The woman is not at liberty to choose when to submit. Submission was a command, same way loving was a command.
Unless a man is mad, it’s impossible to not to love a woman who is totally submissive. Of course we have mad men, so such cases also abound. Same way some mad women abound who expect and demand love, equity yet fail to submit totally.

princeeze1:

In trying to sound socially correct, you ended up not making sense. Using the writer’s biblical analogy, is submission a thing of choice and preference? You cannot force a person who has already submitted, it’s simple logic, hence submission was demanded before love. It’s either you are submissive or you are not. Same way it’s either he is loving or not. The woman is not at liberty to choose when to submit. Submission was a command, same way loving was a command.
Unless a man is mad, it’s impossible to not to love a woman who is totally submissive. Of course we have mad men, so such cases also abound. Same way some mad women abound who expect and demand love, equity yet fail to submit totally.

Sorry to ask this question. Are you fully submissive to God?

Salesagents:


Sorry to ask this question. Are you fully submissive to God?

In relation to the topic, isn’t this the most silly question to ever evolve out of nairaland? You don’t have to comment or respond when you don’t have a superior argument…… shakes head!!!

princeeze1:


In relation to the topic, isn’t this the most silly question to ever evolve out of nairaland? You don’t have to comment or respond when you don’t have a superior argument…… shakes head!!!

It was a simple questions because you said if a wife is submissive her finances is inclusive, submission is a thing of choice, not by force, if she is submissive in other areas and fails in finances, it is a matter of time. It is not fair to force your wife to make contribution on house affairs when it is the sole responsibility of the husband to handle. She's just a help meat. Helps comes when needs come that means when the husband is out of funds at the moment.

Salesagents:


Thanks

You're welcome

This post is for real men(simps) who are willing to take care of a fellow adult like them in the name of marriage...

Na everyday feminists dey collect stray bullet because I don't see the point of highlighting them in this your topic now. It is well.

True