Noah9:
I want to thank everyone for their advice and I really appreciate everyone involvement about the thread I created 2week ago. Here is the link.
https://www.nairaland.com/6933724/regretted-actions-please-me

Great people of this forum, honestly things have never been better ever since that incident and I wish our minds are like show glass so that y'all would see how sorry I am inside of me. I messed up and I'm really sorry.

5 days after I created that post above, My wife traveled with my daughter to her parents house to stay without telling me. Since that incident my wife haven't said a word to me, Not a single word. Sometimes I wonder if she's the same woman I married. I'm frustrated, incoherent and I'm losing my mind.

I've been good to her, I provide 85% for my family while she bring just 15% yet I don't complain, I'm romantic and good looking, since we married I don't keep female friends not to talk of cheating. Yet She denied me sex over 2 months without any reasons, that was why I acted that way and I'm so sorry.

On Tuesday here, My friend and I traveled to her parents house, they did not even welcome us well, I don't know what she must have told her parents but I explained myself, knelt down and asked for forgiveness.

She refused to come home with me, her parents were just starring at me like I'm some demon, I requested for my daughter but she refused to release her and I've already paid my daughter's school fees for the term. Her parents said they would register my daughter in a new school, that my wife need some space for now.

Please don't call me a weak man, I'm family oriented, I don't want broken home, if she needed some space that's not a problem, I can give her all the space in the world but let her come home. It's not proper raising a child in a broken home...I'm really losing my mind.

I faced query today at work because I traveled without informing my Boss which I know he won't allow me and I know how much would be deducted from my salary. what I'm going through now I can't wish my enemies and I wish I could turn back the hands of time. I messed up.

Beloveth Pls I need advice.

You didn't go to her parents house with the right person. In cases like this, you need to go with your parents or some elderly kinsmen. They know the right thing to say and they would be given audience more than you.
You have to repeat the journey again. Use a work free day this time. Arrange for elders that will go with you. Perhaps two if possible. If after the second visit nothing is done, come back home and continue with your life. The only reason your wife wil deny you sex is that someone was distracting her. Going to her family is just a mere opportunity to live free from you.
Note: If after the second visit she doesn't come back, make sure any day she finally decides to come that you don't sleep with her for at least two months. You need to be sure she doesn't get pregnant and rush back to hang it on you. Be wise.

silibaba:


Help you how?

Financially or you need advice?

If she stay pass 2months for her parents place, call me anything.

Just ignore she and her family. Pretend like you have moved on with your life and give me report later.

Go and work on yourself sexually. I never see any girl or wife that will abandon her man if he is an expatriate in bed.

No one is worth dying for.

SIMP

Coachee . I quite agree with you on the sexual prowess thing. However, women can be so dumb and stupid trust me. Even if you are a machine perere, if they wan to mess up only Jesus can stop them.

Ladyhippolyta88:

I have never been violated and never will be but I have seen women share their stories even men too, I must not be violated to know how terrible and disastrous the victims feel.

You should be the one taking your advice since in your head you could not reason that it isn't about the OP or his remorse but about a woman he claimed to love and protect whom he violated and broke her trust and it is up to her to decide heal and forge ahead

But your selfish self could not see that and you try to trivialise the suffering the wife faced in his hands and you think think that a mere apology can suffice in a psychological and physical issue you should be the one healing because you obviously need help.

Keep quiet please.

"To err is human and to forgive is divine."

OP erred st"pidly/f*olishly, but erring is erring, he is a human, and he has realized it.
What he needs is to give her space/time to process, think and act i.e decide on her next step, not expecting her to heal OR forgive/forget immediately.

What the OP did is terribly wrong, but have you reasoned what led to it?
Someone denying her husband sex for two months.
Do you know the importance of sex in marriages?
Ask anybody that has been through marriage class to tell you how important "SEX" as a topic is in marriage class.

You didn't see anything wrong in what she did because she is your fellow gender.

Do you know people are wired differently to handle issues differently? Not everyone can handle sex starvation from their legally married wife appropriately.
Some can even go to depression, anxiety, restlessness etc because of that and that is why some women use it as a weapon.

Some men will never fall for such act from his wife, they would have done the needful which will put her on the blame and regret spots anyhow people spin it.
Anyway, she or her kind wouldn't do that when they her with such men because they would have thought about how the men will handle it and how they will be the ones to lose out in their own game.

Lastly, I think OP should tell his parents and if they can, they should follow him to meet her parents to fulfil all righteousness, and if nothing changes, make the guy give her space and move on.

Ahmed0336:
Bros, you have done all is needed of a Gentleman. You made a mistake, had apologize to her and her family and most importantly you are remorsed about that act.

If I may, what was her reason(s) for sex starving you? What were her parents stand regarding it?

Oga no stress yourself, if she wan stay with her parents let her be.
If her parents want to change your daughter's school just to wicked you let them do it.

Use this time to develop yourself and save more. Peace!!!!

This is the best advice. If I'm the one in your shoes, I'll be thanking my stars.

olatunjithomas:


Just the way your father raped your mother to produce an incomplete child like you.

Just the same way you are being raped every miserable day of your life just because you add no other value to the course of humanity.

hahaha... You just proof to me you're not a man... Weak man kid

Mtewcw! When man should be thinking about how top account balance by 2 million dollars in 2022 this one is here crying for woman in the name of a wife that is denying him sex! Sex oh! You even went to beg and they refused! WTF, I hate reading nonsense!

The truth is, you need to stay strong. Your wife set up all these but the fault is you couldn't see it coming.

Your wife led you into temptation, of which you fell into the trap due to lack of self control. Proverbs 25:28 says, "A man who has no control over his spirit is like a city broken down, without walls."

Marriage is indeed full of temptation, and sexual temptation is not excluded.

What your wife wants to achieve is to use this to control or rule over you, or as away to gain freedom from you.

Your lack of self control has brought you to your kneels before her. Brother, kneeling down and begging her is not the way to go, because she has just begun with you. You would keep doing this and loose your self respect totally.

What happens is a trap she set for you. If you had worked on your self-control she would have not being able to get you.

What you need to do.

1. Work on self-control by taming your anger and hunger for sex or the desire of always wanting to see her. Give her some space for now. You've already paid for the term, you can ask for a refund from the school. Let them know that your daughter has started school else where.

2. While you're working on your self-control you should only call her ocassionally not to ask of her, but to ask of your daughter's well being. Because, asking your wife about herself and telling her your feelings might be another trap for your soul. Focus on yourself and your daughter's well being for now.

3. After you found out that you've improved in checking your anger or feelings. And you're comfortable living without her in your life (this is what your situation should teach you) then you can go to her physically for the purpose of reconciliation. She would still try to upset you, or twist your words against you, but ignore it. Tell her that you still love her and if she comes back to you, you would still accept her. Even if she doesn't agree, leave it that way and go. Don't be a man of many words. Continue your relationship with your daughter by checking on her.

Your wife would change her mind concerning you seeing how you handle your daughter with love, even though she is away from you.

Note

1. If you intend to use force to claim your daughter you are only adding fuel to the fire. Let peace reign.
2. Your wife might never return to you if she has being dating someone secretly. Accept your fate in this case. There's nothing you can do.
3. All the things I said you should do would request your patience. This matter will not end at once. It's only your self control and patience that would end this matter peacefully.

Lastly, put everything in prayers. Only God can truly define marriage. Your life has not end. This has happened to people before. I pray that God heals your broken heart.

hosey:


You are a foolish fool. If I were your wife family, I will have brought police and taken you to court. I will ensure everyone in your place of work know that you have been raping women since where you are young and all women in the office should be wary of you.

The OP is big time ra.pist. He is going to r.ape his daughter if he is sex starved when his wife is not around. He needs to be arrested and imprisoned for many years.

If you're being sued for defamation now, do you think you can ever get out of it?? Do you have proof to support your family allegations??

Make your mouth no put you for trouble.

[quote author=Stereotypes post=109549323]The way people gloss over rape on NL is shocking.So many sick men or boys here.

The Op said he slapped his wife till blood was pouring from her face.Does that sound like one slap to you? Is his hand  made of iron? This man probably punched her face till she bled.

His wife must've been screaming and struggling with him,but what did he do?

He had an erec tion which he proceeded to put into a terrified woman who's vag ina was dry.

What happens when a vagina is dry? It gets bruises and tears,Op continued to fu ck till he ejac ulated.
Who gets turned on till ejaculation with a partner who is bleeding,struggling and dry down there? Does this sound normal to you sickos?

Next day,his wife must've had a bruised face ,traumatised psyche and a battered bleeding  vag ina,and Op expects her to be fine  just because he said sorry.

Then you sick fu cks expect her to have recovered instantly and accepted it as punishment for not having secks for 2 months.

No one is taking into account the sort of trauma he has caused her.This will be with her forever.The woman is so traumatised that she hasn't said a word to him since that day and you people are here talking rubbish.

So, if he asks her something and she says no,what next? Beat out another blood and shove it in again? You people have no concept of trauma ,the effect of seeing someone that loves you become a monster ,beat out blood and then proceed to be aroused from it Disgusting!

There are a lot of ways to deal with lack of sex for 2 months.Forceful intercourse garnished with iron fisted slaps is not the way.

Imagine saying her parents are not welcoming you? No atom of self awareness in your bones.
They have said she needs time,leave her alone and let her have that time.Its not in your place to dictate how she should deal with what has happened.

A lot of you have daughters or will have daughters abi? No problem.



God bless you

I was once in ur shoes some years back, but I didn't rape her, my guy take this from me don't ever beg her and her family again, yes u did wrong by raping her and the beating, which you have begged and now u just have to man up, brace up urself the worst is divorce the earlier u put that in ur mind the better for you, what u need to do, go meet your family (parent) and pastor explain everything to them, cause it will be better your own family is involved and if your wife and her parent still insist on her staying with them ur family will be on the know cause u need people around u, I know loneliness is there the urge for sex etc, but as a man, man up face ur fears and move on till theyake up their mind, focus more on ur job and anything that will make u happy, stop sending them money they left ur house u didn't send her packing, they are not on ur roof and care so don't send any money let her parent do the husband work since they can't talk to their daughter, before any woman will denie her husband sex my guy her mind is off the marriage, no matter what u might have done to her if she really love u, she would have open up to u on what u did wrong, take this any thing u do now in despiration to bring her back without her mind being in the marriage my guy u will regret it, give her space don't call and beg if she really wants the marriage only she will get in touch with u, my guy if u stay small she nor dey come find babe to run things with, u are a man u need a woman by urside, but brace up for the worst and change ur ways cause don't let it repeat itself with her or any other woman u choose to marry, like my situation I have moved on, no child unlike u, am even happy now, achieving things I didn't achieve when I was married, as a guy never marry a woman cause of love, or shape, marry a woman who can be ur friend, who supports u in all aspect, marry a woman who hustle to bring things to the table for the home, u can't beat a woman who u know also provide in the home as u do, if she didn't give u sex, u lock up, u can do short time in any hotel, u run ur thing, a woman is more afraid when her man doesn't ask for sex more, at times starve her let her know how it feels too....concentrate on ur job the more....u can open up to ur boss if he is the friendly type so he understand ur situation more but if he is not friendly lock up....

Noah9:
I want to thank everyone for their advice and I really appreciate everyone involvement about the thread I created 2week ago. Here is the link.
https://www.nairaland.com/6933724/regretted-actions-please-me

Great people of this forum, honestly things have never been better ever since that incident and I wish our minds are like show glass so that y'all would see how sorry I am inside of me. I messed up and I'm really sorry.

5 days after I created that post above, My wife traveled with my daughter to her parents house to stay without telling me. Since that incident my wife haven't said a word to me, Not a single word. Sometimes I wonder if she's the same woman I married. I'm frustrated, incoherent and I'm losing my mind.

I've been good to her, I provide 85% for my family while she bring just 15% yet I don't complain, I'm romantic and good looking, since we married I don't keep female friends not to talk of cheating. Yet She denied me sex over 2 months without any reasons, that was why I acted that way and I'm so sorry.

On Tuesday here, My friend and I traveled to her parents house, they did not even welcome us well, I don't know what she must have told her parents but I explained myself, knelt down and asked for forgiveness.

She refused to come home with me, her parents were just starring at me like I'm some demon, I requested for my daughter but she refused to release her and I've already paid my daughter's school fees for the term. Her parents said they would register my daughter in a new school, that my wife need some space for now.

Please don't call me a weak man, I'm family oriented, I don't want broken home, if she needed some space that's not a problem, I can give her all the space in the world but let her come home. It's not proper raising a child in a broken home...I'm really losing my mind.

I faced query today at work because I traveled without informing my Boss which I know he won't allow me and I know how much would be deducted from my salary. what I'm going through now I can't wish my enemies and I wish I could turn back the hands of time. I messed up.

Beloveth Pls I need advice.

Sorry to ask this. (1)are you guys married

(2) and what tribe are you guys

same thing happened to someone way back and we know how we fought to gain his kids back and the woman has no choice to come back home because our kids was taken from her... She has no say to seize your kids you're the man of the house so decide for yourself. You need to fight for this,it has been plan between she and her parents for long but you don't know this... Go retrieve your kids from her and see the magic shows up

bigjackass:
My own is that you actually saw her bleeding when you hit her but still carried on to rape her. The blood and tears didn't move you. And you think you will win custody of your daughter when this story gets to court . You are no different from an animal . That your wife can never love you again and even if she's forced to return to your house, you will still end up raping her again because she will never willing give you sex. Anyway forget about collecting your daughter because I doubt any court will give you custody of a girl child after such an act. Just go and remarry and start a new family.

100 likes.

I fear for the 'new family' though.

He is a beast.

While single guys get unlimited sex, a married man was denied sex for two months. Instead of sacking his wife like an African man or marry a second wife, he decided to physically assault her which is very wrong.

Pocohantas,
you've been conspicuously absent. But you see why I support a man have several source of sexcome!

Never go on your knees to apologize to your woman in the presence of a 3rd party. Calling her father aside to have a one-on-one discussion would have done you a lot of good. Personally I don't pay much mind to the opinions or countenance of women, so your best bet would have been to isolate the man of the house from them. After all he's married to your wife's mother, surely he's experienced something similar.
You really had no business presenting yourself as a remorseful little school kid who had to report to the principal's office after been caught pissing in the pool. After the incidence i remember how sorry you were, you accepted you were in the wrong and even knelt down to apologize to her. That said, i have little respect for any woman who has zero or little accountability for her actions; whose first reaction after a little quarrel is to pick up her kid and leave her matrimonial home. I really don't know what's going on with these millennial women,
our grandmothers never had the luxury of monogamy or family planning, neither did they have a washing machine or running water. They went to the farm to source for wood and food, streams tens of kilometers away to get water, raised over a dozen kids and still surrendered to their husbands in the bedroom with zero fuss or drama.

Personally i wouldn't leave my daughter in the care of those lots, I'll turn that shīt hole of theirs upside down before i let my own blood get raised by a woman who can't hold down her man. A decent father would have sent her back to resolve issues with her husband. Good luck with una and this marriage wahala jare.

I will give u a good advice, i just hope u Put it into consideration.
Since u hv done all those things at this point just ignore her completely. Dont call her, dont send her msg etc. just be busy with ur life. She will begin to panick, when she is ready for discussion She will come. because in this matter u r not only at fault, she has to tell u reason why she does not want or enjoy sex with u any more. Probably u r not neat or u dont do it well d way she wants it or she does not love u anymore etc... she has to tell u. There has to be dialogue and then u hv to correct that idea or behavior of leaving her matrimonial home to her parents house just because of a misunderstanding. I am a married woman of over 12years i mean what is d offense of a man who has legally married a woman and is asking for sex and for two months she refused. Something is wrong somewhere.

Jennyclay:
Your wife did the right thing by moving to her parent's house.

You hit your wife so hard that she was bleeding from her mouth (only God knows how many times you hit her be4 blood gushed out), you saw her bleeding mouth, and you raped her. Sir you're a professional in raping.

She also did a good thing by not releasing your daughter to you. Because you might rape the little girl too. We have read many cases here on nairaland how Men rape their daughters and it all started like this.

You want her parents to welcome you with beer and asun for beating & raping their daughter?? oga you're on your own oo.

BEER & ASUN got me laughing though

olatunjithomas:



If you're being sued for defamation now, do you think you can ever get out of it?? Do you have proof to support your family allegations??

Make your mouth no put you for trouble.

You this rapist. Don't just let me catch you. If I do, I will ensure you rot in prison.

Noah9:


Her parents said they would register my daughter in a new school, that my wife need some space for now.

I can give her all the space in the world but let her come home.

I faced query today at work because I traveled without informing my Boss which I know he won't allow me and I know how much would be deducted from my salary .

You must really be losing your mind .... this thread is almost the same as the last ... your mindset is pretty much the same. Getting to the root of the problem from her is not on your mind. The mother said she needs space ... space from you. Why would you insist she can have the space at home?... home with you?
You provide 85% ... she 15% to the running of the home/business? This shows your mindset and you don't even know. Your wife was living in a house ... not a home. On job and boss... why can't you be macho with your biss?... why be afraid of him?... to tell him you need a few days to attend to an urgent family matter?... you need not explain. He asks... remind him you said it's personal.

I advise instead of sitting and fuming to take a good look at the man in the mirror and see what changes he needs to make to start being a family man.

ndicharlez:

He thought being the husband has given him every right over the woman and he must turn her to intimacy gadget.
That marriage is death already cuz that incident will still ring in her subconsciousness whenever he is close to her not to talk of making love to her.
Men should have self discipline when it comes to sex

Abi o. Rapist derive joy in hurting their partners.

This is not the first time that rapist OP "Noah9" has been r.aping women.

He has been r.aping women before marriage.

hosey:

You this rapist. Don't just let me catch you. If I do, I will ensure you rot in prison.

Too many products of rape roaming the Internet space.

Spits on your dead head.....

First, in Life there is always options to chose from, but you pick the wrong one, rape is bad is even less of a case because she is your wife, now what you need do is to show her you feel remorse and go the extra mile to make her feel comfortable with you again but outside that please try and get one banny (dark,tall n young) around to ease your sexual huge, it will help your married and make your focus. Because sex won't be an issue again. Would have love to advise you to change it for her and her parent but you are wrong on this one no moral justification but if na say you cheat on her she come they make all this noise after all she did, because she deliberate want you to directly develop prostate cancer denying sex for 2 months......2 months my brother.

You have to be a man about this. You already made some mistakes but you can still correct things.

Firstly, you have to approach the matter traditionally (western ideally is OK, but even they admit that cultures are different and gave great influence on conflict resolution).

1. No more apologies to your eife and her family.

2. Request for a man2man meeting with her father. Go along with one or two older men to support you.

3. If her father refuses to meet, then inform your family and arrange same meeting with her father.

4. End the meeting with him on the mote that you love your wife and you want her back but she must know her limits.

5. If he doesn't play ball, then let him know you would give dome time for a rethink before proceeding to end marriage.

6. Maintain contact with your wife. If she doesn't pick or respond, still maintain contact, for years records. If she responds, let her know its time to come home and that both of you should learn lessons from the situation.

7. Register both of you for counselling but separately.
In due course, you fo it together.

Selah

uote author=Noah9 post=109541484]I want to thank everyone for their advice and I really appreciate everyone involvement about the thread I created 2week ago. Here is the link.
https://www.nairaland.com/6933724/regretted-actions-please-me

Great people of this forum, honestly things have never been better ever since that incident and I wish our minds are like show glass so that y'all would see how sorry I am inside of me. I messed up and I'm really sorry.

5 days after I created that post above, My wife traveled with my daughter to her parents house to stay without telling me. Since that incident my wife haven't said a word to me, Not a single word. Sometimes I wonder if she's the same woman I married. I'm frustrated, incoherent and I'm losing my mind.

I've been good to her, I provide 85% for my family while she bring just 15% yet I don't complain, I'm romantic and good looking, since we married I don't keep female friends not to talk of cheating. Yet She denied me sex over 2 months without any reasons, that was why I acted that way and I'm so sorry.

On Tuesday here, My friend and I traveled to her parents house, they did not even welcome us well, I don't know what she must have told her parents but I explained myself, knelt down and asked for forgiveness.

She refused to come home with me, her parents were just starring at me like I'm some demon, I requested for my daughter but she refused to release her and I've already paid my daughter's school fees for the term. Her parents said they would register my daughter in a new school, that my wife need some space for now.

Please don't call me a weak man, I'm family oriented, I don't want broken home, if she needed some space that's not a problem, I can give her all the space in the world but let her come home. It's not proper raising a child in a broken home...I'm really losing my mind.

I faced query today at work because I traveled without informing my Boss which I know he won't allow me and I know how much would be deducted from my salary. what I'm going through now I can't wish my enemies and I wish I could turn back the hands of time. I messed up.

Beloveth Pls I need advice. [/quote]

Noah9:
Please I'm not asking anyone for money here and why're you calling me a Simp?

Just because I needed my wife back home?? It's my wife I married legally I'm talking about here.

you are still talking about legally here, if they take it up with that legally in court, you will end up in prison.

Noah9:
If she needed space, that's not a problem. I don't mind buying food outside and I promise not to ask her for sex But let her just come home. Let's talk things. She haven't said a word to me.

You dealing with a narcissist. Don’t be a whimp anymore than you have been. Try to get across to me on WhatsApp or drop your number

olatunjithomas:


Too many products of rape roaming the Internet space.

Spits on your dead head.....

You are a confirmed rapist. All rapists like you and Noah9 deserve life imprisonment.

DMerciful:
While single guys get unlimited sex, a married man was denied sex for two months. Instead of sacking his wife like an African man or marry a second wife, he decided to physically assault her which is very wrong.

Pocohantas,
you've been conspicuously absent. But you see why I support a man have several source of sexcome!

I have never stopped any man from having a second wife. He should bring all of them home and marry them traditionally. If you can show me just one thread where a man MARRIED a second wife and I condemned him, I will deactivate immediately. Just one comment…

If you have to quote me, please quote me correctly.

A man physically abusing his wife and going on to rape her is not a demerit of monogamy. Even single guys do it. A polygamous man can do it. Above all, you won’t recommend multiple sex partners for a woman that did same to her husband. Thank you

bestpunterever:
you are still talking about legally here, if they take it up with that legally in court, you will end up in prison.

Don't mind the foolish and rapist OP, Noah9

The wife parents are very lenient. He should have been imprisoned now. Rapist like him deserve life imprisonment. This is not the first time he has been r.aping women. He can't control his sexual appetite. He will r.ape his daughter when sex starved. He is a nuisance and useless human.

hosey:

You are a confirmed rapist. All rapists like you and Noah9 deserve life imprisonment.

But your father is still roaming the street a free man.

Are you not surprised too

BabaIbo:


Keep quiet please

You should be the one keeping quiet

"

To err is human and to forgive is divine

Spare me this BS if that is the case then we should not be prosecuting criminals since the perpetrators can always ask for forgiveness from their victims, rape and assault/battery are crimes not child's play.

OP erred st"pidly/f*olishly, but erring is erring, he is a human, and he has realized it.

He is not the one that was hurt so his realization is immaterial it is left for the wife to decide but she must heal first

What he needs is to give her space/time to process, think and act i.e decide on her next step, not expecting her to heal OR forgive/forget immediately

I agree and she should not remain in that marriage after she heals because he will do it again and she will likely not be able to get past that painful memory while still with him.

What the OP did is terribly wrong, but have you reasoned what led to it?
Someone denying her husband sex for two months.
Do you know the importance of sex in marriages?
Ask anybody that has been through marriage class to tell you how important "SEX" as a topic is in marriage class

I have realised what led to it and I cannot comprehend how assaulting and raping your wife is the solution or reaction to such, the op is not completely honest the wife will not deny him sex without valid reasons and even if she does it is her bodily autonomy and she can decide for herself you don't force anyone to sleep with you without their consent

didn't see anything wrong in what she did because she is your fellow gender

I don't understand abeg where is denying someone sex a crime even if the person is your husband is it not her body to do what she whats with it,rape and assault are both crimes sex denial is not so his reaction was distasteful and overboard,even men deny their wives sex do their wives assault and rape them?

Do you know people are wired differently to handle issues differently? Not everyone can handle sex starvation from their legally married wife appropriately

Please keep quiet because we are wired differently does not give you the right to rape someone you are having sexual starvation talk to your spouse or go outside not rape them and they are at liberty to deny you sex if they want to.

Some can even go to depression, anxiety, restlessness etc because of that and that is why some women use it as a weapon

Depression and anxiety because of lack of sex lmao even you don't believe that,the person suffering depression should get help not sex.

Some men will never fall for such act from his wife, they would have done the needful which will put her on the blame and regret spots anyhow people spin it.
Anyway, she or her kind wouldn't do that when they her with such men because they would have thought about how the men will handle it and how they will be the ones to lose out in their own game.

Lastly, I think OP should tell his parents and if they can, they should follow him to meet her parents to fulfil all righteousness, and if nothing changes, make the guy give her space and move on.

What is the needful?you lots think some women give a crap about you or that you are that important wahala for who nor sabi play game

The wife should leave him even if he brings Buhari to beg he has scattered his own marriage and should get out from her life

hosey:


Don't mind the foolish and rapist OP, Noah9

The wife parents are very lenient. He should have been imprisoned now. Rapist like him deserve life imprisonment. This is not the first time he has been taking women. He can't control his sexual appetite. He will take his daughter when sex starved. He is a nuisance and useless human.

I don't support the wife too, most women are manipulative, but the guy is very weak....

Noah9:
I want to thank everyone for their advice and I really appreciate everyone involvement about the thread I created 2week ago. Here is the link.
https://www.nairaland.com/6933724/regretted-actions-please-me

Great people of this forum, honestly things have never been better ever since that incident and I wish our minds are like show glass so that y'all would see how sorry I am inside of me. I messed up and I'm really sorry.

5 days after I created that post above, My wife traveled with my daughter to her parents house to stay without telling me. Since that incident my wife haven't said a word to me, Not a single word. Sometimes I wonder if she's the same woman I married. I'm frustrated, incoherent and I'm losing my mind.

I've been good to her, I provide 85% for my family while she bring just 15% yet I don't complain, I'm romantic and good looking, since we married I don't keep female friends not to talk of cheating. Yet She denied me sex over 2 months without any reasons, that was why I acted that way and I'm so sorry.

On Tuesday here, My friend and I traveled to her parents house, they did not even welcome us well, I don't know what she must have told her parents but I explained myself, knelt down and asked for forgiveness.

She refused to come home with me, her parents were just starring at me like I'm some demon, I requested for my daughter but she refused to release her and I've already paid my daughter's school fees for the term. Her parents said they would register my daughter in a new school, that my wife need some space for now.

Please don't call me a weak man, I'm family oriented, I don't want broken home, if she needed some space that's not a problem, I can give her all the space in the world but let her come home. It's not proper raising a child in a broken home...I'm really losing my mind.

I faced query today at work because I traveled without informing my Boss which I know he won't allow me and I know how much would be deducted from my salary. what I'm going through now I can't wish my enemies and I wish I could turn back the hands of time. I messed up.

Beloveth Pls I need advice.

My guy,

You are human and not immune from mistakes but the fact of the matter is; it isn't about your mistakes, it's about the ripple effect from your mistakes: the trauma, anxiety and ptsd you have caused her.

She would really need time to heal, No one (NOT EVEN A JUDGE IN COURT) will care about the events leading up to your action, what you would be held responsible for, will ultimately be the trauma you caused her during your assault act. Hence crime.

You have pleaded but you can't erase that trauma from her mind like a dirty slate and the reason she didn't talk to your when still in your house was because she was SCARED for anything worse hence, she decided to run to her parents place behind your back.


What should you do?

You have done the right thing by going over to her parent's place to apologize. But for now everyone needs space.

Don't send money unless it is requested from her. Money indicates value and your role responsibility to your family.

If she never request money from you, she don't want you play a role in her life or your daughter's life going forward. And if you force it by sending money to her bank account without she requesting, you stand a chance to be manipulated by her using your sin as blackmail in the future and reconciliation will be hard. She might even never return to your house.

BUT

When she reaches out to request for money, use that time to always talk good to her, make the conversation about her coming back home, soothing her mind with small talks, Always assure her the mistake will not repeat itself. And sometimes tell her you bringing the funds to her in person. This is a way to facilitate the defunct relationship gradually till you form a bond again.

But when things eventually straightens out and she returns home and still continues to hoard sex, oga get you a side girl and do your thing outside. If she complains with it then that will be a fresh battle to begin again because marriage is war and you must overcome every battle as a man otherwise you lose her but even if your lost her, it's no big deal since she already has your seed.