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Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Amazingbaby: 11:24am On Feb 10, 2022 |
Biko toks2008 and baby123 make una leave my page even though I love baby123 Link to the first https://www.nairaland.com/6971181/husband-left-us This week have been crazy, I took alot of advice from this page and was minding my business, I called him on Saturday to come pick the kids because I deserve rest, he said he would prefer coming to the house to see them, he came I cooked and we all ate around 5 he picked up some clothes and left. He kept calling to talk about things in general and I was responding fine. My kids got sick on Sunday (night fever) and I spent all night tepid sponging and administering drugs. On Sunday night, he went out with his infamous friend when I called him around 10 he was still out (something he hardly do) when he got back he called and we got talking one thing led to another and I still asked him about the text message and the girl as usual he kept on hammering on how he doesn't owe me any explanation. I told him that if he doesn't give me an explanation I would have to call the girl directly, he cut the call and I actually called her. When I asked her where she went with my husband the lady told me that my husband saw that she was interested in tech event and took her there on that Saturday, he actually went to pick her up (lol). I asked her how did she know everything about his business and why would she want to work for him for free, she said my husband normally come to his friends office and when he is not around he do strike up conversation with her and tell her all about his business and she was interested in growing it (lol). She got very uncomfortable and started talking about how she is a minister in her church (I actually bursted out laughing at this point), she said a whole lot of things contradicting everything my husband told me, he was even talking with her since he left the house. 12 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by superCleanworks(m): 11:36am On Feb 10, 2022 |
hmm 43 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Amazingbaby: 11:42am On Feb 10, 2022 |
I called my husband and actually blasted him calling him a very big liar and how embarrassed I am.on Monday I left for the hospital he called and we discussed some business and the kids(I was actually not angry again knowing that he is no different from any other guy,if you see how he use to condemn cheating ehh....) Only for my mum to call me around 12 in the afternoon to ask me questions,my husband actually called my mum after I confronted him about what the girl said to tell her he is DONE with me,that I don't give him peace in the house that this and that.in summary calling the girl actually triggered divorce because I am ready for anything. For those that are doubting that I am a woman,abeg I am. I followed some lovely people advice and I have actually achieved alot of things this week 1i paid for driving lessons (he literally have to drive me everywhere or I take Uber) 2 I have dusted out my certificate and is seriously looking for jobs(I have contacted alot of outsourcing firms) 3 signed up for gym classes. In a way I lost myself trying to be a good wife and mother that I literally drove away alot of my friends.i had to stop talking with a good olfriend of mine because my husband was chatting with her behind my back for long (this is one of the reasons I don't trust him) Lots of information... So what and what should I do to upgrade myself I have not work for a long time. Cococandy Double0h7 Mariangle Saintmary 66 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BRATISLAVA: 11:56am On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks: Even if you see a billion things he's doing wrong, you will only be interested in imagining what she could've been doing wrong because your sole interest in relationships is to see the evil in women and the sainthood of the man. Reverse the genders in her story and tell us what you would really have to say. The husband is a manipulative, lying, cheat with no respect for his home. Meanwhile you can focus on her imaginary nagging. Ignore his blatant BS as much as possible. To the OP: Never lose yourself over a marriage or a man. I can't understand women who kick out family and friends to focus on their husbands and children only. Yes, you have a responsibility to them, but you also should have a life outside them. Your life doesn't revolve around marriage and children only. Don't stop working to please a man, because you will only have a life of regrets afterwards. Link up with friends and family and let them help you get footing in a job, networking, etc. 145 Likes 13 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by faithfull18(f): 12:04pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Hmmn. 1 Like 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by gaby(m): 12:11pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Okay...interesting. |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by superCleanworks(m): 12:14pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BRATISLAVA: my sole interest in relationships? please do not move too fast or did you not read where i pointed out that it would have been nice if her soon to be ex-husband gives his own side of the story? or you are just in a hurry to respond? 6 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BRATISLAVA: 12:16pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks: Reverse the genders and tell us what you really want to say to all. You have taken sides and made allegations about the OP. You want to advocate the husbands side of the story as if any of your one-sided imaginary allegations are worth what he's doing to her currently. You're a noisy gender bigot. 52 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by superCleanworks(m): 12:23pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BRATISLAVA: it is not my fault that you lack the simplest basic ability to read and comprehend anything and you are carried away by emotions like a fish brain. that is entirely your problem. you are a very shallow minded ass kisser. 10 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by socialmediaman: 12:25pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Madam @ Amazingbaby them don snatch your husband. Your husband is one of those men who are unhappy with their marriages to the point that they're emotionally checked out of the marriage. Then one day, they meet this lady who lends them a listening ear, motivates them and provides emotional support for them, but tells them "you're still married, I can't sleep with you until you take care of your situation". Perfect motivation to end his marriage. You both seem to have irreconcilable differences, or maybe some ego problem in your marriage, and nobody wants to take the lead in reconciling those differences. If you still want him, then set your ego aside and tell him, and suggest therapy to him as a last reasonable effort to try to save your marriage, although it may be a little too late. Many Nigerian men will decline therapy because traditionally they want their wives to be the ones to adapt and make changes in the marriage, but if they don't want to lose her, they'll do anything to keep her. In any case, he owes you at least an explanation of what went wrong in your marriage, if you don't already know. What you're doing presently, that is, trying to get a job and improve yourself, is the best you can do for yourself and your children. Join support groups online and offline, do as much research as possible, there are videos on YouTube and TikTok that will teach you almost anything you want to learn. Keep it up. Hopefully things work out eventually. 124 Likes 7 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BRATISLAVA: 12:27pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks: You're the daftest contributor on the forum. You have fallen to insults when you cannot tell us anything if the genders were reversed. You have conveniently spewed your garbage insinuations about the OP being a nagger. All that you're lacking is the extra daftness to allege she's a cheat. It is good that we can finally see what you think of her that prompted your first idiotic post full of assumptions. Anyone reading it can see you're wholly stupid with nobody to tell you. You are a noisy gender bigot. PS: Anyone who listens to men on the forum is listening to embittered individuals like the above one with deranged opinions on women without any backup. These are the sorts of people you entrust your judgement to. 106 Likes 8 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Amazingbaby: 12:29pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks: There was no place I said he was the demon. It is my narrative so it has to be narrated through my words,oga how would I know what he is feeling,I only know of his actions. Did I not wrote that he said I hardly give him Peace? That is his words,so what do you want me to say.oh chim! I am anything but a saint and if demanding answers from my "husband"means I nag and choke then so be it. 68 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by superCleanworks(m): 12:32pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BRATISLAVA: funny cry baby. you started by calling me a bigot and you are here crying. suck your finger 8 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BRATISLAVA: 12:36pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks:You are a gender bigot. And you know it. You simply pretend to conceal it by posting as if you care about the husbands side. You use it to deflect from the hatred you have for the OP and other women. That is why from her entire post you could only conjure imaginary things that she did to the man. Because without a defense for his actions, the best you can do is attack her to make her points seem weak. That way you will get to bash her. It's an old game of small boys on the forum and beyond. Anyone can see through it. Reverse the genders then pass your comment. You are a bigot. 68 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BRATISLAVA: 12:38pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: Read his next post to know why you cannot bring relationship issues to this forum and expect a fair hearing. 23 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by superCleanworks(m): 12:43pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: yes i read every word right from your first post and i am not surprised that your husband will say such because that is what your whole story smells of. Amazingbaby:of course you said it all. he is the bad guy that packed his bags and abandoned his family. just like that. you chose the perfect word to make the world see what a bad person he is and emotional fools like BRATISLAVA have already swallowed it wholesale. Amazingbaby:here you go again with your emotional sinker. good luck 18 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by superCleanworks(m): 12:46pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BRATISLAVA: can you all see this mustard seed brain? 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Amazingbaby: 12:55pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks: Are you for real? What do you want me to say, should I have lied that he is home when he is not? Abandon his family? I never said anything like that Am I dealing with an insane person on nairaland? I hate pity that is why I warned my mum never to tell my siblings or anyone,why then would I need nairalnds pity? Biko I need practical opinion on how to move forward.avoid me. 45 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by superCleanworks(m): 1:13pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: insane? LOL. you must be and angry i am not telling you what you want to hear. but since you like insults.... 23 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Saintmary(f): 1:18pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: So, where do we start from? 1. Don't be afraid. 2. Take your time to decide for yourself what you want, and what kind of man you want in your life. In the meantime: Don't call the girl again. Don't ask your husband about her. But please don't have sex with him. Don't demean your body. It's not easy but that's the best way to help you and him to figure out what you want for yourselves. A man who triangulates you with another woman is disrespectful, immature, narcissistic. He will tell you her qualities while showing you how inadequate you are. He has seen you finish. See finish. If you're tired of doing nanny work, take the kids to Grandma's, preferably your Mom. REINVENT YOURSELF Anticipate and be proactive. Where do you want to be living? Which career do you want to take up? Take things one step at a time. He will still try this nonsense with you again. Whatever you do, don't stop your career efforts, because for him to gather the liver to threaten your MOTHER with divorce shows he doesn't mind living without you. And he has ZERO RESPECT for your Mom. What are we even talking about here? Face front and build some dignity for yourself! If he wants you back, you have to check if he's truly repentant (repentance will take a while). And never let him do that to your mother ever. 42 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Saintmary(f): 1:25pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: You deserve to know what is going on because you're his wife. If he gets stabbed in a hotel room, you'll be forced to clean up his mess. Yes, a responsible man should not treat you this way. P. S. That friend of his is a jackass, avoid him. 18 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Amazingbaby: 1:27pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks:Okay thanks |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by cococandy(f): 1:37pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
OP you’re taking the necessary first steps in reinventing yourself. That’s great. He’s still obviously disrespectful and still wants to act like he’s the victim in the situation. Yes he owes you explanation that’s what marriage is about and if he’s says otherwise, then he’s not ready to stay married. You can’t force or beg someone to be married to you. 37 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by luminouz(m): 1:45pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
See all the people you quoted Feminists to the core. Happy new life to you 24 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BRATISLAVA: 2:24pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks: You're easily identified as a stupid person. Every post you've made shows that you are verifiably stupid. You're a myopic bigoted person and it's good to see how you've exposed yourself as one on this thread. One can easily tell you lack the good sense to have any sort of conversation with you. The only people who will see sense in anything you posted will be stupid ones like you. That being said, shove your wack reasoning in your tiny urethra and piss off. 47 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BRATISLAVA: 2:27pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
superCleanworks: Who is the emotional fool here, if not you who is projecting all your bitterness and failures with women by trying to rubbish and abuse the OP with your unproven allegations about her? Is that how far your bitterness has carried you, to throwing words at random women? Are you the husband? Why is this forum filled with stupid little boys like this one? Once they learn the word emotional in their miseducation, they misuse it when they don't want to/plainly cannot reason in matters that involve women. Ewww. 47 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Idaytesj29(m): 2:28pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: OP amazingbaby Now I feel like crying. You don't sound like a troublesome woman. You come off as dedicated lovely wife. Whatever made your husband chase that lady is not important now but the safety of the marriage. Before you finally sign any divorce papers, I advise that you call a joint family meeting of both your family and his. Narrate everything that happened, thank God, women are naturally detailed. Explain how he wanted to date your best friend and how this happened. Let them know you did not pack out of the house, he did for weeks and he demanded for divorce himself, not you cos you demanded an explanation to from him over the matter. Let them know under normal circumstance, you do not like to be divorced, and while you are not desperate to resolve without him admitting his wrong doings and ready to be accountable for his actions going forward, you are still open for reconciliation right now before your mind moves on. I believe in that sober moment, a lot can change and it had worked for many couple, it may work for you. With all the new resolutions you just made, kindly follow through with them, even if a reconciliation happens. I don't know how to send a WhatsApp group contact to you where various jobs and vacancies majorly in Lagos and few other places are advertised daily, I would have loved to help you with that. Just my own 2kobo 31 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Richy4(m): 2:29pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
The Only part I liked about this whole story is 'dusting Certificate' ..e sweet me die!!!!........ Financial Independence is a very GOOD thing...Everyone deserves a taste of such independence.....Good luck dear.... 44 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Beremx(f): 3:06pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Madam please don’t call the stupid husband snatcher again. Your focus should be how to win your husband back again. The three things you mentioned are the best way to win him back. You should never beg him to come back to his senses. Get a job and always look sexy. Most importantly, be prayerful. Pretend as if he never exist and he will come apologizing to you 6 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Nobody: 3:29pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
I can see you are a nagging woman, and you don't give that man peace of mind... Go and sort out your marital issues abeg. 9 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Acidosis(m): 3:31pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Wrong moves everywhere. 13 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by socialmediaman: 3:42pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: With this information, I have to ask, have you guys tried couples’ therapy? You need to understand his viewpoint about your marriage, from his own lens. Know what is pushing him away, and what he wants from you, even if you can't change or give him that. Understand the viewpoint of a professional about the situation, considering your personalities and situation. Don't try to stifle him by fighting side chicks like some women do, try to fix what's wrong if you can. 3 Likes 1 Share |
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