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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Update On My Husband Leaving Us (44657 Views)
A Skill My Husband Never Knew I Possessed. / Update On Tiv Bride Who Insisted On Marrying Her 'Cousin' In Benue / "I Travelled For 1 Week & My Husband Turned My Kitchen To This" - Woman (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Amazingbaby: 4:03pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
gift0123: Are you female or you identify as a female because I don't understand. 8 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by ezugegere(m): 4:13pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
My take on this matter: 1. You still do not have any evidence that your husband is having an affair with that lady. Talking with someone does not equal to having sex with the person. 2. You sound like a nag. 3. You're taking advice from the wrong people. There is no perfect home. If you're not ready to take some smelly shit, better don't get married. 4. Your husband doesn't have peace at home. No man will pack his things and leave his home just like that. Decide for yourself what you want. If you're not ready to be a wife any longer... then leave! 24 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 4:31pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
ezugegere:Marriage means taking some smelly shit? Where is this written abeg? How some of you dey open mouth gbagadaaaa sometimes dey amaze person. So are you telling us that if you are married and your partner chose to withhold the true nature of a relationship from you, even going as far as to walk out on your family as a result, that you would condone that in your marriage relationship? Anyways, I don't think OP is the one attempting here to end her marriage but instead reacting to what could potentially end it. 14 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by eniolorunfe: 4:43pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
From this your update, it doesn’t seem like you have been minding your business ooo and taking the advice you were given in your previous thread fully. Don’t go and spoil a good thing (didn’t say perfect because there is a difference) because of your inability to master your emotions. Self development is good but you don’t have to lose your marriage before you develop yourself. 14 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Amazingbaby: 4:48pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
eniolorunfe: I am,but he keeps calling me acting as if everything is alright,does he have partial amnesia,I prefer tackling things straight up than pretending.it is one of my flaws My self development is coming from ignoring myself for a long time,this situation might be a catalyst but I haven't been feeling fulfilled for long. 8 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Double0h7(f): 4:51pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
I don't think you have any evidence that your husband is cheating. I do think that you have checked out of this marriage and you've been looking for any excuse to leave and this woman he took on at work is the perfect excuse. The reason your husband won't give you an explanation might be because he knows this too and he is giving you your excuse to leave. You seem like the type of woman who uses the fact that her husband single handedly provides her every need as *He controls everything* and if he didn't pay all her bills then he would be an irresponsible husband. The man can't win! You could ask yourself did you ever love this man or was he just a good meal ticket? Since you're ready to fend for yourself and I'm sure you've romanticized the whole process but reality might check you. You already know what to do to survive so do those things (learn to drive, find a job, exercise and reflect) I would say you gotta do some deep reflection. You've covered his faults but now it's time to reflect on the only faults that matters to you and that's your own fault. Start a journal and be honest with yourself. After every pity party you have, reflect on your contribution and take away the valuable lessons. Be ready for any curveball that might come. Set boundaries and co parent in a healthy environment. Protect your children's mental health. I wish you all the best. 26 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by onez: 4:53pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
OP, Please go and win your husband over. No perfect home or perfect man. You are entering a phase you will regret if you don't take care. Swallow your pride and keep your home. Look for your husband and bring him home. I'm begging you. I'm crying here because you feel you can pull through alone. Look for your husband and bring him home. This is for your sanity. 24 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Magnoliaa(f): 5:11pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
. 1 Like |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by eniolorunfe: 5:15pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: The bolded is the reason why he is saying those things to your mother… that you are nagging, don’t give him peace etc etc You need to work on that flaw and learn to master your emotions. It’s not about pretending, it’s about wisdom and understanding the “art” of being a woman and where your strength lies. Do you have to pick his calls? Even if he’s calling to act like everything is normal; you not picking his calls will send a clear message to him that there are issues that need to be discussed and would allow him miss you. Hopefully that “space” will remind him of how valuable you are to him. Even when you start working, do you just blurt things out to your coworkers or even boss because you don’t know how to pretend? There is an art to these things or else you would have to be changing jobs over and over again. Like I said, self development is good but you don’t have to lose your marriage to achieve this. 13 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Magnoliaa(f): 5:19pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Acidosis: Asinnnn. Mtcheeewww. If persin no know better, one would just be thinking all these stories and fights are all there is to marriages. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Amazingbaby: 6:01pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Idaytesj29: Pls can I message you about the WhatsApp group? |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BigYash: 6:14pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
With what I read up there,op never really loved her husband. Imagine the monikers she mention in her post above.. Its a pity you allowed wrong nairalanders to advise you wrongly. A man can actually marry more than one wife.. Its not a crime.. 14 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 6:26pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BigYash:A woman can also marry more than one husband... also not a crime. 14 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by socialmediaman: 6:39pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
eniolorunfe: It doesn’t look like she wants to save the marriage. Her ego comes first, or maybe she also wants out like the man does 10 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Nobody: 6:46pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Amazingbaby: I am a woman for real, but most times, I call a spade a spade, I made that comment because of the way you narrated your story, it was full of insults and you kept pushing him to the wall. You don't follow things with toughness, most times a cool denamor could solve certain things... Especially when it comes to our issues with men. When you push a man so hard and shout at him you chase him out... Follow that matter easily, you will surely get him back abeg.. Take care. 20 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BigYash: 6:50pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:No problem. If it favors you.. You can marry 50 or even more,its actually your body not mine 10 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 6:51pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BigYash:Same applies to both genders is all I am making clear here. 5 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BigYash: 6:53pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:You're making a mistake there.. Why don't women pay groom prize? This is Africa and not the western world.. You gerrit? 11 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 6:54pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BigYash:Because women didn't put together traditional ideas requiring such payments... men did that for their benefit. Right there in the very same Africa, 100s of thousands also married without keeping to your traditional ideals and their marriages just as strong or even stronger for it. : 7 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BigYash: 6:57pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:Then,women you be fast about putting that together for their benefit too.. Until then,they should follow the rules made by the various African societies.. Its simple.. 4 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 6:58pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BigYash:Why would women want to institute such a foolish idea to begin with? 6 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by baby124: 6:59pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Hmm. Only you truly knows your husband. However he seems like someone who wants you to be alright with any affairs he may have. Once you open such a box, you may not survive it. Since he says he’s done with the marriage, reduce communication with him except he wants to see his kids. Let him be done, no more courtesies and cooking for him. Let him be the bachelor he craves. Start putting your own life together. What a joke of a man, who in this day and age works for free. Lmao. He even has time to be doing driver for a single woman. Jokes all round. Just focus on you woman. If you should ever make up, make sure that his friend does not come close to your family ever again! Make it hell for him! Your husband also has a lot of work to do if he ever wants his marriage back. I don’t support you calling the girl though. That was a wrong move. Making her more important than she is and giving her the chance to call your husband with lies about what you both discussed. Trust that she told him something else entirely that will cause more problems. 13 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BigYash: 7:04pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:Probably because most of them are confused .. The same confusion is the reason why most "women" hate each other.. You gerit? 14 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 7:07pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BigYash:You are not making any sense here. Why would women institute a backwards idea which pretty much reduces a one to status of ward/slave in the marriage? Why would a woman want to take on responsibility of caring for the numerous husbands she marries when it is best if they each retain their individual responsibilities in the marriage? 5 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BigYash: 7:10pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:And what would you called a society or union without a leader/rules and regulations? Since your mind told you ,that you're making sense. 12 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 7:11pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BigYash:A partnership/agreement. And mind you , you have it all wrong believing there are no rules and accountability in such a partnership. 4 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BigYash: 7:15pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:That's why I said most of you women are confused.. The society you are in ,does it support such? Now,if you wanna do that,you go to where people appreciate that.. I hope you gerrit now? 11 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 7:17pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BigYash:Polyandry is practiced right there in the very same Nigeria you pretend to know. Instead of continuing your existence in ignorance of the realities of that country, why not spend time educating yourself about the different cultures that actually coexist in that jungle of a country? 6 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by BigYash: 7:20pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:You mean you're from a jungle? Now I understand where you're coming from... Enjoy the rest of your evening.. 7 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Kobojunkie: 7:29pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
BigYash:.... there are over 250 ethnic groups in Nigeria meaning 250 potentially different traditions makes makes the place a jungle of sorts. Try to keep up! 8 Likes |
Re: Update On My Husband Leaving Us by Philomath1212: 7:33pm On Feb 10, 2022 |
I'm happy for that man... Now, he can have peace... 10 Likes 1 Share |
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