Hmm, it depends on the mother strength and weakness...

Ouchbabe:
If the career is too demanding, she can actually slow down a bit by getting a job like teaching that will give her time for her children.
Using myself as an example, my previous job was too demanding, I had to resign and pick up teaching job. Salary from teaching is so small so I added other side hustle. I sell perfume oils. I'm a very good cook so I just started an online restaurant where I cook, pack and deliver foods to people within my locality ( Lekki, VGC, Ajah, Sangotedo and environs). My customer base is still very small but I'm pushing, hoping that God will pick my call soon

Jisike nne. The people that buy food mostly are men, single men to be very specific. Thankfully you are living in an axis that is occupied by those socks wearing boys. I would suggest you find a way to be active where they are active, Instagram and Telegram. Handle them with caution and professionalism. If you rely on just your circle which would be mostly family people, I am afraid you won’t sell much. Even when they need your services, they would want it for free.

Keep pushing. This was lovely to read.

My wife is heavily pregnant for second baby now,she studied computer science ( Hnd) and currently want to study nursing, having baby shouldn't be a distraction.

drmuchin:


We need more lectures on this

It's pretty straightforward. Career is a long-term goal while a job is a short-term position to earn money. Pregnancy will definitely affect most jobs but pregnancy should never be an issue when it comes to managing the long-term goal.

Take a female medical doctor as a case in point, will pregnancy affect her job at a community private clinic? Yes. Will the Nigerian Medical Association ban a female doctor for getting pregnant? No. So long as she has her license (i.e. skills and personal development plans), her career remains intact. She only lost her job, not her career.

What works for A won't work for B, but I'll say No.

One reason I love my Mum and one of my Aunties is how they handled their career.

Both women are Medical professionals and they didn't put their job down the line because of children. It wasn't easy actually, and so they employed nannies to take care of us, while they were still actively involved in our welfare.

pocohantas:


Jisike nne. The people that buy food mostly are men, single men to be very specific. Thankfully you are living in an axis that is occupied by those socks wearing boys. I would suggest you find a way to be active where they are active, Instagram and Telegram. Handle them with caution and professionalism. If you rely on just your circle which would be mostly family people, I am afraid you won’t sell much. Even when they need your services, they would want it for free.

Keep pushing. This was lovely to read.

Pocohantas darling, thanks so much. What you did for me during the covid-19 lockdown, I will never forget. God will continue to bless you.
Back to my post, you are 100% right. It's just me, my church members, family and friends now. I need to find a way to break out and reach out to my target customers. I have a Facebook page of about 7.5k followers now. Unfortunately, when I create a post, only few people see it. Those that tried contacting me are not even staying in Lagos.
I will try Instagram as you suggested. Thanks Nwanyioma

pocohantas:
Whatever works for her, the kids and her family.

In a place like Nigeria, it might be hard for her to get back into the system whenever she is done with childbearing.

There are husbands that make their wives feel safe. If one is blessed with a man like that, you can afford to make certain sacrifices and not feel like your very essence was taken from you.

Sadly at my last count there are just 5 of them in Nigeria.

Chief census officer, Nigerian Population commission.

It's not surprising people are saying 'don't we have maternity leave'. Maternity leave doesn't cover everything, it's just a fragment.

One knows those who have raised children or helped/ seen people raise children will understand.

Right from the day you get pregnant till that child clocks one, you are practically a nursing mother. For two whole years you might be going to work but your career may be on hold if you don't have a good support system.

There are some small small opportunities that might pass you by as a pregnant woman in the office, which ordinarily you would get if you were not pregnant.

You take days off for antenatal
After your maternity leave, you take days off for hospital visits immunizations blablabla, unscheduled hospital visits, days of not sleeping overnight, days of unscheduled hospital visits

These are the factors some why some organizations don't like employing pregnant women.

It's always better if you have a job you can control your movement as a mother of young children.

But you see those leave home 5am come back 9pm spend four hours in traffic jobs for a pregnant /nursing mother, e get as e dey be.

Be it the man or woman, a parent has to be around with the child, don't leave your child in the care of anybody. I was once a child and i always envy how my neighbour's father or mother was always at home with the kids.

PrimadonnaO:
This topic isn't discussed enough.

*********
Age, marriage, child birth, if not carefully planned can adversely affect a woman's career.

You are right and a lot of times these factors are out of the woman's control.

empressSkincare:
I don't support women putting their career on hold cos of their children. There should be a way a balance can be made between the two.

Naaa....one has to give

Career women are a norm in the west but the 'balance' still remains elusive.

dingbang:
Chief census officer, Nigerian Population commission.

You know me naaaa.

Ouchbabe:

Pocohantas darling, thanks so much. What you did for me during the covid-19 lockdown, I will never forget. God will continue to bless you.
Back to my post, you are 100% right. It's just me, my church members, family and friends now. I need to find a way to break out and reach out to my target customers. I have a Facebook page of about 7.5k followers now. Unfortunately, when I create a post, only few people see it. Those that tried contacting me are not even staying in Lagos.
I will try Instagram as you suggested. Thanks Nwanyioma

It was my pleasure. Wow! 7.5k followers is a lot! To receive you have to give small. So you should be willing to share some of your recipes and tricks to build more interaction. I am even surprised to know you cook so well because you don’t send our Food Thread . Lagos people are everywhere, just come out of your shell. You are welcome once again.

And that reminds me! Banks are another soft targets! The problem is that they can owe fa! But if you partner with a big branch that needs an in-house canteen, that way they stop sending cleaners to buy food, that would work! I am rooting for you.

Women who actually have kids or have been pregnant hardly contribute to these threads so the true situation is hardly ever known.
Its mostly men parroting the idea that their wives must work so as to bring something to the table.

Working a morning till evening job while pregnant or pregnant with kids is not a walk in the park.
Pregnancy itself is not just moving around with big belly for 9months. Many women suffer severe sickness that makes them sick and nauseated morning till evening while pregnant. It's just that some women are lucky their sickness only lasts the first three months and some few ones don't even get sick at all.
Then in the last three months there is waist pain from carrying the pregnancy and constipation and heartburn and difficulty sleeping and God know what else but the same woman is still expected to wake up every weekday and go to work, stay the whole day there, maybe sitting at a desk, and then return back in the evenings.

I can write from now till tomorrow, the truth is that people who have never been pregnant will never understand the difficulty in it.

Then when you put to bed if you are lucky and you have a job in a company where you are given three months paid maternity leave you get to focus on your baby and raise him for three months. Then what next after that? You start dropping a tender three months kid in daycare from 8 in the morning till 6 in the evening because of your job. The same baby that had not collected all their vaccines and immunizations and is still sensitive, you expose that baby to germs and infections (cataarrh and cough, diarrhea ) that children in daycare are prone to getting. You continue like that till they are old enough to go home from school and stay home by themselves, usually around 10/11years old, and at that point it's daycare that has helped you raise your child not you the mother.

The way jobs in society are structured, placed working mothers' lives and wellbeing as an afterthought. The system was arranged to favour men and fathers that don't have to worry about pregnancy and kids.

pocohantas:


You know me naaaa.



It was my pleasure. Wow! 7.5k followers is a lot! To receive you have to give small. So you should be willing to share some of your recipes and tricks to build more interaction. I am even surprised to know you cook so well because you don’t send our Food Thread . Lagos people are everywhere, just come out of your shell. You are welcome once again.

And that reminds me! Banks are another soft targets! The problem is that they can owe fa! But if you partner with a big branch that needs an in-house canteen, that way they stop sending cleaners to buy food, that would work! I am rooting for you.

Well noted. Thanks for rooting for me. Women supporting women *winks*

NoToPile:
It's not surprising people are saying 'don't we have maternity leave'. Maternity leave doesn't cover everything, it's just a fragment.

One knows those who have raised children or helped/ seen people raise children will understand.

Right from the day you get pregnant till that child clocks one, you are practically a nursing mother. For two whole years you might be going to work but your career may be on hold if you don't have a good support system.

There are some small small opportunities that might pass you by as a pregnant woman in the office, which ordinarily you would get if you were not pregnant.

You take days off for antenatal
After your maternity leave, you take days off for hospital visits immunizations blablabla, unscheduled hospital visits, days of not sleeping overnight, days of unscheduled hospital visits

These are the factors some why some organizations don't like employing pregnant women.

It's always better if you have a job you can control your movement as a mother of young children.

But you see those leave home 5am come back 9pm spend four hours in traffic jobs for a pregnant /nursing mother, e get as e dey be.

Well said. It was when my organization achieved a good representation of female directors that these issues were trashed out. Before, forget positive appraisal/promotion in the same year you were pregnant or nursing a child under 1year, because like you pointed out, it is assumed you didn’t work in between going for antenatals, maternity leave, immunization visits, oh they just called from my child’s school, my child woke with a fever and I have to drop by the hospital first. They said he would need drip, I am sorry I can’t come today…etc

I think we need more sensible women in corridors of power. There are female issues you cannot LOGICALLY address. You need to be a woman to relate to them.

pocohantas:


Well said. It was when my organization achieved a good representation of female directors that these issues were trashed out. Before, forget positive appraisal/promotion in the same year you were pregnant or nursing a child under 1year, because like you pointed out, it is assumed you didn’t work in between going for antenatals, maternity leave, immunization visits, oh they just called from my child’s school, my child woke with a fever and I have to drop by the hospital first. They said he would need drip, I am sorry I can’t come today…etc

I think we need more sensible women in corridors of power. There are female issues you cannot LOGICALLY address. You need to be a woman to relate to them.

You get the drift.

It's not really easy for a lot of women.

Na manage lots dey manage.

pocohantas:
Whatever works for her, the kids and her family.

In a place like Nigeria, it might be hard for her to get back into the system whenever she is done with childbearing.

There are husbands that make their wives feel safe. If one is blessed with a man like that, you can afford to make certain sacrifices and not feel like your very essence was taken from you.

Sadly at my last count there are just 5 of them in Nigeria.

I am definitely not among that 5, even if I am dangote, my wife must be mentally active doing some productive work, I don't care if it's bringing money, I just don't like idleness, its death, just like a stagnant water stinks.

I will more like it if a woman has a passion she is pursuing, even if she don't have time for me, I am not selfish and not afraid to lose her to her passion either, if I love someone, I want them to be happy and fulfilled, even if it mean sacrifice on my part, that is how I show my own love, not by being foolish, or encouraging you to be foolish.

It's when a woman mind is idle that she begins to have unnecessary thoughts, an active mind got no time for bs. I got married women dotting on me, if they are mentally occupied, they won't think of me, they will think of their husband and the progress of their family.

What is the use of having a family when my partner isn't much concerned about it progress, except through wishful thinking "I pray my husband be great, but its all In the hand of god, and destiny ". Fvck God and destiny, human being write their own story and make history, even if it is destined, as people died without fulfilling destiny, so do people live and change their destiny " the will of man is the will of God.

A union should be a source of strength, whereby the both party are actively contributing to enhance progress, not one depending on another and expecting security and satisfaction, who tell you that men are superhumans.

Career first , kids later

nahzyla:
Women who actually have kids or have been pregnant hardly contribute to these threads so the true situation is hardly ever known.
Its mostly men parroting the idea that their wives must work so as to bring something to the table.

Working a morning till evening job while pregnant or pregnant with kids is not a walk in the park.
Pregnancy itself is not just moving around with big belly for 9months. Many women suffer severe sickness that makes them sick and nauseated morning till evening while pregnant. It's just that some women are lucky their sickness only lasts the first three months and some few ones don't even get sick at all.
Then in the last three months there is waist pain from carrying the pregnancy and constipation and heartburn and difficulty sleeping and God know what else but the same woman is still expected to wake up every weekday and go to work, stay the whole day there, maybe sitting at a desk, and then return back in the evenings.

I can write from now till tomorrow, the truth is that people who have never been pregnant will never understand the difficulty in it.

Then when you put to bed if you are lucky and you have a job in a company where you are given three months paid maternity leave you get to focus on your baby and raise him for three months. Then what next after that? You start dropping a tender three months kid in daycare from 8 in the morning till 6 in the evening because of your job. The same baby that had not collected all their vaccines and immunizations and is still sensitive, you expose that baby to germs and infections (cataarrh and cough, diarrhea ) that children in daycare are prone to getting. You continue like that till they are old enough to go home from school and stay home by themselves, usually around 10/11years old, and at that point it's daycare that has helped you raise your child not you the mother.

The way jobs in society are structured, placed working mothers' lives and wellbeing as an afterthought. The system was arranged to favour men and fathers that don't have to worry about pregnancy and kids.

It is just what it is, you need to work harder as a working class woman.

That creche own is even obvious, during covid lockdown lots mothers noticed their children didn't come down with cold or cattarh at all. No temperature nothing for the 6months school was off.
Immediately schools resumed the story changed.

I must give it to Lagos State though, Lagos govt workers have 6 months maternity leave for the 1st 2 children you have after employment, then all others are 3 months.

All allowances fully paid.

jeff1607:
Career first , kids later

Why if I may ask?

You know there are factors that might not make this possible.

1. Age of graduation
2. Years hunting for job
3. You now manage to get one five years after graduation
4. You get married 2 years after you get the job
5. You now expect the woman to place child bearing on hold first for the career when she might want to have all her kids before 35- 40.

I am just trying to let you see our Nigerian system that's all.

PrimadonnaO:
This topic isn't discussed enough.

*********
Age, marriage, child birth, if not carefully planned can adversely affect a woman's career.

...my career baby...

alluringsophy:
That's actually not Proper. you can still go ahead with your career and Have children. it shouldn't deprive one her career. The only reason you may think of quiting is if the career is too demanding. you can actually get a freelancing career where you will be able to work at the comfort of your home and make money.

Or you don't have a supportive spouse.

Nigerian society is still where the responsibility of bearing and raising children lies heavy on the shoulders of the women after all.

Younghacka:
A God-fearing Housewife Is Bae

What gives you the idea that a God-fearing woman will toss her career for her kids?

A God-fearing woman will even give up entirely on the idea of having kids for the sake of God. Can you handle such a woman?

Kobojunkie:
What gives you the idea that a God-fearing woman will toss her career for her kids?

A God-fearing woman will even give up entirely on the idea of having kids for the sake of God. Can you handle such a woman?

God fearing housewife! When men such as these say God fearing thats actually synonymous to "submissive" lol.

while house wife is synonymous to woman who is only smart enough to know not to refuse him sex, wash cloths, prepare his meals, raise "his" kids, tidy the house. lol.

There are crazy people on this earth!!

Why can't you do both?

pocohantas:


Jisike nne. The people that buy food mostly are men, single men to be very specific. Thankfully you are living in an axis that is occupied by those socks wearing boys. I would suggest you find a way to be active where they are active, Instagram and Telegram. Handle them with caution and professionalism. If you rely on just your circle which would be mostly family people, I am afraid you won’t sell much. Even when they need your services, they would want it for free.

Keep pushing. This was lovely to read.

This woman, the oil wey dey your head didn't come from church, but from the alters of heaven itself.
My mum started a computer school and went bankrupt in 2 years. na charity for friends cause am.

No

zicoraads:

...my career baby...

Lol.

pocohantas:
Whatever works for her, the kids and her family.

In a place like Nigeria, it might be hard for her to get back into the system whenever she is done with childbearing.

There are husbands that make their wives feel safe. If one is blessed with a man like that, you can afford to make certain sacrifices and not feel like your very essence was taken from you.

Sadly at my last count there are just 5 of them in Nigeria.

Not to worry, we are working on increasing the number. Thank you!

NoToPile:



It is just what it is, you need to work harder as a working class woman.

That creche own is even obvious, during covid lockdown lots mothers noticed their children didn't come down with cold or cattarh at all. No temperature nothing for the 6months school was off.
Immediately schools resumed the story changed.

I must give it to Lagos State though, Lagos govt workers have 6 months maternity leave for the 1st 2 children you have after employment, then all others are 3 months.

All allowances fully paid.

Personally I think 6 months maternity leave is way better, both for the health of the mother and child but only few employers would understand that.

After six months you just have to hope for the best and pray that no care giver maybe creche or nanny, abuses (physically or sexually) the child while you go to work. Many of these caregivers are just demons in human skin, like the animals that flogged that one year old boy to death.

It's just sadenning all around.
The burden on womens head is quite much and they hardly get acknowledged for it.

kkins25:

God fearing housewife! When men such as these say God fearing thats actually synonymous to "submissive" lol.

while house wife is synonymous to woman who is only smart enough to know not to refuse him sex, wash cloths, prepare his meals, raise "his" kids, tidy the house. lol.

There are crazy people on this earth!!

ROFLMAO