Faber:


How can you take responsibility of a child whose mom have cheated on you several times...and the other guys knows she's cheating on them too.

Are the girls responsible that's the first question. No sane guy will leave a child born to him by a girl he knows 100 percent he is the only one bleeping her. If he leaves her, know for sure is because of financial instability, he will still come back for them.

One of the guys in my area, who is as broke as myself (yea am broke, have you seen Messi's pay slip? ) Have a son with a lady. The lady is staying in another state, doing good business and taking care of the boy. Every year, this guy, invites the lady on the boy's birthday, and will celebrate the little boy and the mother. He will invite friends, prepare birthday cake for the boy, etc. He's been doing that for 3 years now. And if you see the boy, na the guy carbon copy. Fair and fat like the papa.

you’re very sound,

I know a baby mama. Beautiful and really brainy. We had this discussion over the weekend and she told me point blank "every woman is responsible for her body and what goes in and out of it" I even tried to put some blames on the men and she still maintained her stance that it is the woman who has the ultimate decision and not the man. Unless she is a teen or mentally challenged.

Offpoint1:
Baby mama is the result of irresponsible men...

If your girlfriend gets pregnant, and you know you're responsible... Take responsibilities.

Abandoning them gives rooms to what you observed.

Where is the irresponsible man now! Continue deceiving yourself. The woman is the one that still bears the brunt! If they like, they should use their brain to take the the right decisions, if they like they should allow the irresponsible men to think for them, when the shot hits the ceiling, they will be on their own.

The blame should be mutual. Both made a choice to have sex, while either of them could have abstain.

Ladies also initiate sex though, and if we should go discreetly, they initiate sex most of the time, the difference is that they are not buoyant like the male to ask for sex. Infact, some will even tell you they can't stay in a relationship where there is no premarital sex.

Both are to be blame.

Offpoint1:

That's why I clearly stated "irresponsible men" are the cause.

You're a responsible man, you saw the future and you averted disaster.

Women are like kids, they behave like them. You can easily sway them with words or materials.

So women are like kids? Lol how many women on Nairaland agree with this?

there are pretty much irresponsible men out there, same as the women too, but lets get this straight, alot of single mothers are out there are the architect of there singleness,they forget that at that stage is when they need to display all positive traits, coz if the pregnancy was a mistake the man might see a better person in dem and accept faith,most men are ready to accept faith and move on but these ladies would frustrate the man to leave,but responsible men still take responsibilities no matter what...

Paulianfa:
So I went to a bar to relax after church and from the crazy NIgerian heat of today.
...........

One of the bartender, cheerful, pretty and shinny ebony tone; tall, straight shape with very sexy size shape of an ass came with her baby girl. This little girl is about 7 years from my estimation...but frolicking about and taking in the bad expoure of such ambience.

The problem I could quickly deduce is that this bar is a very notorious one, infamous for immoral kind of gals and guys who many times have no inhibitions about public display of affection...smoking , kisses and all sort. It houses a bar too , where hornny sexual duos come to relieve their inordinate appetite.

I began to wonder the much influence such place could have on that innocent 7 year old kid. Look at the risk, look at the future and psychological implications, and in all of these this baby mama probably do not care or is blinded by the poverty that brought her there in the first place.

My advice is this: Young gals should try to empower themselves first, above personal pleasure, instead of having the dream of being a baby mama.
Many a times, the kids are the unfortunate and innocent recipient of such ills.

Really sad. I can only imagine what will become of those kind of children..Hmmmmm
Babymamaism is more problem for the future.


Ur grammar alone scare me

If you got the message then it means he communicated and that is all that matters. Mr. Grammer!

Favfables1:


Lemme get this...
A woman will sleep around...
Refuse to use any form of protection...
Get pregnant for a man...
And when the man goes away...
She absolves herself of all blames and puts it on the man?
How stupid and immature ....

She had a choice to not have sex with the man, she had sex...
She had a choice to use protection, she didn't...
She had a choice to abort, she didn't...
And now that the cumulation of those choices have resulted in pregnancy, it's suddenly not her fault? It's now the man's fault??

Gosh!!
Indeed people do think with one side of their brains and it's unbelievable ....

Sheybi women are out there shouting "my body, my choice" it's their body, so if they end up as baby Mama's, then it's their choice!

There are many cases when the guy will bring out a condom and the girl will say no!

Kuriosmynd:
So I went to a bar to relax after church and from the crazy NIgerian heat of today.
...........

One of the bartender, cheerful, pretty and shinny ebony tone; tall, straight shape with very sexy size shape of an ass came with her baby girl. This little girl is about 7 years from my estimation...but frolicking about and taking in the bad expoure of such ambience.

The problem I could quickly deduce is that this bar is a very notorious one, infamous for immoral kind of gals and guys who many times have no inhibitions about public display of affection...smoking , kisses and all sort. It houses a bar too , where hornny sexual duos come to relieve their inordinate appetite.

I began to wonder the much influence such place could have on that innocent 7 year old kid. Look at the risk, look at the future and psychological implications, and in all of these this baby mama probably do not care or is blinded by the poverty that brought her there in the first place.

My advice is this: Young gals should try to empower themselves first, above personal pleasure, instead of having the dream of being a baby mama.
Many a times, the kids are the unfortunate and innocent recipient of such ills.

Really sad. I can only imagine what will become of those kind of children..Hmmmmm
Babymamaism is more problem for the future.

Such lopsided nonsense.

Always blame the women for everything wrong in the society.
You forgot to advise the men to keep their Sausages in their pants, and use condoms when they cannot control their appetites, so as not to leave girls with babies without fathers.
If the men were more responsible, there would not be baby mama's struggling to eke out a living while taking care of children all by themselves.
The men , absent fathers are the ones who should be ashamed of themselves.

czarr:
who chose to lay in bed with these irresponsible men?...is it a responsible woman? Women should be accountable for who they choose to spread their leg for.

KNOCKOUT

some of them go get belle for riff-raff finish com run as dem see say e no b husband material. irresponsible beings

HenryDion:
OP, first, I want to commend you for your impeccable use of words. Your species are endangered here on NL.

There is a difference between impeccable (flawless) and bombast

I can guarantee whoever that kid's dad is, he doesn't contribute a dime to her upkeep, thus, the very reason why her mother is doing what she's doing.

Then again, I've seen such things countless times, I've even given hope trying to even say anything about it.

So OP, her mother exposing her to such inappropriate things, what do you think is the worse thing that can happen to her?

Grandmeister:
I know a baby mama. Beautiful and really brainy. We had this discussion over the weekend and she told me point blank "every woman is responsible for her body and what goes in and out of it" I even tried to put some blames on the men and she still maintained her stance that it is the woman who has the ultimate decision and not the man. Unless she is a teen or mentally challenged.

.... But she is absolutely right.

I always laugh when people try to blame the guys. If ladies keep saying that their body is theirs and its nobody's business what they do with it. Why blaming men when you get pregnant and get dumped?
Since it's nobody's business on how you want to live your life,then bear the consequences of your actions and stop looking for whom to blame.

We can keep arguing over this issue but the honest truth,that is if we want to tell ourselves the truth is this. No man no matter who he is can get in-between the laps of a woman without consent from such a woman apart from rape. Even at that,a woman who allows a guy to come into her without protection should check her brains.

Let's look at it this way. You saw a poisoned food and very aware that it can harm or even kill you,felt nonchalant about it and goes on to devour it. Who do you blame? Yourself.

Ok let's also look at it this other way. As a guy you were about to sleep with a girl and she tells you she is HIV positive,you didn't care and went in raw . If you get infected with HIV who do you blame? Yourself offcourse.

The thing is that we don't like hearing the truth. We must look for whom or something to blame.

Favfables1:


Lemme get this...
A woman will sleep around...
Refuse to use any form of protection...
Get pregnant for a man...
And when the man goes away...
She absolves herself of all blames and puts it on the man?
How stupid and immature ....

She had a choice to not have sex with the man, she had sex...
She had a choice to use protection, she didn't...
She had a choice to abort, she didn't...
And now that the cumulation of those choices have resulted in pregnancy, it's suddenly not her fault? It's now the man's fault??

Gosh!!
Indeed people do think with one side of their brains and it's unbelievable ....

Sheybi women are out there shouting "my body, my choice" it's their body, so if they end up as baby Mama's, then it's their choice!

There are some username you see and then move on to the next comment.

You did not have to point out that you left went to that bar from leaving church.
I know church going is a formality for many people today, as they are not living the life of righteousness, but still it sounds really preposterous to tell us that you went straight from church to such a place.

Kuriosmynd:
So I went to a bar to relax after church and from the crazy NIgerian heat of today.
...........

One of the bartender, cheerful, pretty and shinny ebony tone; tall, straight shape with very sexy size shape of an ass came with her baby girl. This little girl is about 7 years from my estimation...but frolicking about and taking in the bad expoure of such ambience.

The problem I could quickly deduce is that this bar is a very notorious one, infamous for immoral kind of gals and guys who many times have no inhibitions about public display of affection...smoking , kisses and all sort. It houses a bar too , where hornny sexual duos come to relieve their inordinate appetite.

I began to wonder the much influence such place could have on that innocent 7 year old kid. Look at the risk, look at the future and psychological implications, and in all of these this baby mama probably do not care or is blinded by the poverty that brought her there in the first place.

My advice is this: Young gals should try to empower themselves first, above personal pleasure, instead of having the dream of being a baby mama.
Many a times, the kids are the unfortunate and innocent recipient of such ills.

Really sad. I can only imagine what will become of those kind of children..Hmmmmm
Babymamaism is more problem for the future.

Offpoint1:

It still falls back to the men, 95% of sex are initiated by men... The 5% are runs girls and ashawos.

Your point is pointless. It takes two to tango, who wants to be with a toxic lady that doesn't wants to calm down but only smiles with you when you showers money on her. It's either you are one or you haven't been in that position before, hence your ignorance and offpoint comments.

Kuriosmynd:
So I went to a bar to relax after church and from the crazy NIgerian heat of today.
...........

One of the bartender, cheerful, pretty and shinny ebony tone; tall, straight shape with very sexy size shape of an ass came with her baby girl. This little girl is about 7 years from my estimation...but frolicking about and taking in the bad expoure of such ambience.

The problem I could quickly deduce is that this bar is a very notorious one, infamous for immoral kind of gals and guys who many times have no inhibitions about public display of affection...smoking , kisses and all sort. It houses a bar too , where hornny sexual duos come to relieve their inordinate appetite.

I began to wonder the much influence such place could have on that innocent 7 year old kid. Look at the risk, look at the future and psychological implications, and in all of these this baby mama probably do not care or is blinded by the poverty that brought her there in the first place.

My advice is this: Young gals should try to empower themselves first, above personal pleasure, instead of having the dream of being a baby mama.
Many a times, the kids are the unfortunate and innocent recipient of such ills.

Really sad. I can only imagine what will become of those kind of children..Hmmmmm
Babymamaism is more problem for the future.

From church to bar how come?
What has light n darkness have in common?

ShaqFu:
I can guarantee whoever that kid's dad is, he doesn't contribute a dime to her upkeep, thus, the very reason why her mother is doing what she's doing.

Then again, I've seen such things countless times, I've even given hope trying to even say anything about it.

So OP, her mother exposing her to such inappropriate things, what do you think is the worse thing that can happen to her?

.
The effect is obvious Bros.
.
Rape....

Inappropriate touching by drunk men...

She can see such life as normal and become sexual too early for her development...............
.
Can lead to early pregnancy
.
She can quickly be influenced into Alcoholism, drug, and smoking...

Can affect her intellectual development and choice making...

plaetton:

Such lopsided nonsense.

Always blame the women for everything wrong in the society.
You forgot to advise the men to keep their Sausages in their pants, and use condoms when they cannot control their appetites, so as not to leave girls with babies without fathers.
If the men were more responsible, there would not be baby mama's struggling to eke out a living while taking care of children all by themselves.
The men , absent fathers are the ones who should be ashamed of themselves.

I am not sure from what I read there that the writer reserved blame for women.

Kuriosmynd:
So I went to a bar to relax after church and from the crazy NIgerian heat of today.
...........

One of the bartender, cheerful, pretty and shinny ebony tone; tall, straight shape with very sexy size shape of an ass came with her baby girl. This little girl is about 7 years from my estimation...but frolicking about and taking in the bad expoure of such ambience.

The problem I could quickly deduce is that this bar is a very notorious one, infamous for immoral kind of gals and guys who many times have no inhibitions about public display of affection...smoking , kisses and all sort. It houses a bar too , where hornny sexual duos come to relieve their inordinate appetite.

I began to wonder the much influence such place could have on that innocent 7 year old kid. Look at the risk, look at the future and psychological implications, and in all of these this baby mama probably do not care or is blinded by the poverty that brought her there in the first place.

My advice is this: Young gals should try to empower themselves first, above personal pleasure, instead of having the dream of being a baby mama.
Many a times, the kids are the unfortunate and innocent recipient of such ills.

Really sad. I can only imagine what will become of those kind of children..Hmmmmm
Babymamaism is more problem for the future.

Be talking s**t there. Who is to say the father is not a deadbeat who married the lady and disappeared?

You don't know we have plenty of spem donor in these parts

Until you actually have the full story, get off your moral high empty headed horse

Stupid excuses....

Don't women stay with men all the time even their numerous other girlfriends....Lol

Keep making useless excuses for your failures. Those kids will still grow up to despise you and adore their mothers who took proper care of them.

You still lose on both sides.

Take a cue from the single parent epidemic in America, who is it affecting the most?

Faber:


How can you take responsibility of a child whose mom have cheated on you several times...and the other guys knows she's cheating on them too.

Are the girls responsible that's the first question. No sane guy will leave a child born to him by a girl he knows 100 percent he is the only one bleeping her. If he leaves her, know for sure is because of financial instability, he will still come back for them.

One of the guys in my area, who is as broke as myself (yea am broke, have you seen Messi's pay slip? ) Have a son with a lady. The lady is staying in another state, doing good business and taking care of the boy. Every year, this guy, invites the lady on the boy's birthday, and will celebrate the little boy and the mother. He will invite friends, prepare birthday cake for the boy, etc. He's been doing that for 3 years now. And if you see the boy, na the guy carbon copy. Fair and fat like the papa.

AfroKnight:
This reminds me of those days when I used to drink in street bars.

I actually saw a mature man bring his little boy (4 years old or so) to the bar, then he ordered beer and allowed the boy to drink until he slept. This was a mature man, looking responsible. I couldn’t help staring. Our eye jam. Me, I carry my eye comot and face my beer.

That boy might grow up to win drinking competition in future sha. Practice makes perfect.

That is immoral parenting and child abuse. Why would the bartender even allow that?

Offpoint1:
Baby mama is the result of irresponsible men...

If your girlfriend gets pregnant, and you know you're responsible... Take responsibilities.

Abandoning them gives rooms to what you observed.

Many new generation women are not ready to be a wife. They are mostly agitating for partnership, yet they have pretty low contribution to the union.
If a man sees much incompatibility in the woman and decided to call it off, the court might still not allow the man to take charge of the child.

Don't blame the men for not being responsible when most of the women out there are something else.

Run a quick survey online and see their true nature.

Yesterday we read about a woman who is considering divorcing her new husband on health ground, simply because she's compatible to donate an organ to him.

Let's say that man come back healthy and decide to let the woman go, you will still blame the man, right?

Op, you went to bar after church service ?

superCleanworks:
over 90% of single mothers i have seen usually give birth to girls. why?

Maybe men are more likely to wife the woman if she gives birth to a son?

Offpoint1:

I know what the focus is, let's start from the root of the problem. If the guy responsible for the child took responsibilities, the innocent girl wouldn't be there in the first place.

it depends what you mean and understand by being responsible.


Is it by marrying the baby mama or just taking care of the mother and child(ren)

czarr:
women are the sexual selectors...as long it's not rapey then the responsibility is on the woman. How many men wanted to have sex with you that you let have sex with you? Men can only try, women remain the sexual selectors.

well women select based on the man's ability to convince them. And in most cases if not all. The man doesn't come off as irresponsible. They like to paint a very adorable picture of themselves to pitch the banny

superCleanworks:
over 90% of single mothers i have seen usually give birth to girls. why?

snake begets snake!

Xilsbridalhouse:
Op, you went to bar after church service ?

Yes...as heat one finish me for house

arthurwillia:


lol
What will you say about an 18 year old who got pregnant for a 19 year old in my street, is it because of the irresponsible guy or lady

Those ones are old . The ones on my street were both in Jss2. They said they didn't know how it happened. That they were just playing in the bathroom . They had twins.

Kuriosmynd:

The effect is obvious Bros.
.
Rape....

Inappropriate touching by drunk men...

She can see such life as normal and become sexual too early for her development...............
.
Can lead to early pregnancy
.
She can quickly be influence into Alcoholism, drug, and smoking...

Can affect her intellectual development and choice making...

The girl's mother already view such things as normal that's why she's not even perturbed about having her daughter in such a place.

Men and women are both responsible for pregnancies.

Favfables1:


Lemme get this...
A woman will sleep around...
Refuse to use any form of protection...
Get pregnant for a man...
And when the man goes away...
She absolves herself of all blames and puts it on the man?
How stupid and immature ....

She had a choice to not have sex with the man, she had sex...
She had a choice to use protection, she didn't...
She had a choice to abort, she didn't...
And now that the cumulation of those choices have resulted in pregnancy, it's suddenly not her fault? It's now the man's fault??

Gosh!!
Indeed people do think with one side of their brains and it's unbelievable ....

Sheybi women are out there shouting "my body, my choice" it's their body, so if they end up as baby Mama's, then it's their choice!