When a Nigerian man wants 50:50, he wants 50:50 in only bills. And if you as a woman agree to such, then you are a phool dear.

Let me explain the real 50:50.

1. Bills: 50:50
2. Cooking: 50:50
3. Childcare: 50:50 - when the baby is tender, you stay up this night and he stays up the following night. Yes, just pump breast milk and he will feed the baby.
When it's time for school runs, you take them, and he brings them back, or vice versa. Or you both hire nanny and split the nanny bills 50:50.

4. Domestic chores: split cleaning, laundry, market errands, etc 50:50. Or you hire a housekeeper and split the housekeeper's salary 50:50.

5. Pregnancy: all the money you lose as a result of pregnancy and childbirth, split into 2 and ask him to pay 50%.
For instance, if I was earning $6,000 per month and I got pregnant, and as a result my earnings drop to $3,000, here is the formular:
The cost of pregnancy on your earning is $6,000 - $3,000 = $3,000.
$3,000 divided by 2 = $1,500
He will pay you $1,500 per month.

I know pregnancy and childbirth takes a toll on your body. You can check out prices of cosmetic surgeries and ask him to pay half the total. Afterall, the children that "spoilt" the body belong to BOTH OF YOU. So, he will pay half to fix the body.
Or
You both look for a WILLING surrogate, then pay the surrogate 50:50.

If you look after the kids while he hangs out with the boys this weekend, the following weekend is your turn. He will look after the kids while you hang out with the girls.
Or
You can check if any of the kids' grandparents is willing to look after them for free or for a fee.
Or
You hire nanny and split the nanny bills 50:50.

6. If he draws a prenuptial agreement to secure his assets, make sure you include clauses to secure your own assets too. Don't be silly!

7. If you are doing 50:50, you must contribute 50:50 to any asset you acquire together and include BOTH FULL NAMES.

Alternatively, let him use his money to buy his assets in his name while you use your money to buy your asset in your name.

8. Kids will answer BOTH your names. That's still 50:50.

Dear ladies,
If a man suggests 50:50 to you, lay these terms down for him.

He can't share his own Traditional role with you 50:50 and refuse to share your own Traditional roles with you 50:50. That's bullshitt!

Women need to stop acting naive. It doesn't make you a good woman to allow yourself to be fooled.

PROVISION is the EASIEST thing to do.
If you ask me to choose between pregnancy, childbirth, and primary home keeper VERSUS breadwinner/provider, I'll choose breadwinner/provider. It's much more easier.

The women of my generation seem to be making as much or more money than their male counterparts.
Check out Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. More than 70% of the successful businesses there are being run by women.
Women of my generation are buying houses, lands, cars and even building for their parents.

If money is all you have to offer as a man, you are close to USE_LESSS.

*-*

I do NOT think 50:50 can work in marriage. Someone will get shortchanged, and it's almost always the woman.

*-*

Do I like the 50:50 arrangement in marriage? ABSOLUTELY NO!

Wear your helmet .... They are coming for your head!!


Although iam down with 50 50... Don't want no one telling me Ididn't bring Nada to the table!!!

Buhari no go like these rubbish wey you write

You're very correct my dear, there's so much wisdom in what you saying. But this should be with women who know their place as women in the society, that they are not in anyway equal with men.

But for my fellow women who propagate feminism gospel, I will disagree with you op. Because they seek equality with men, so they should be treated as such. They should split the bills 50:50, the woman who claimed to be a feminist should do her own part while the man does his. Failure for her to take up the responsibilities, then she's not being serious about her stand and view regarding feminism.

But again, let's not deceived ourselves with feminist concept, deep down us , we know there's no way we can be equal with men. Men task was designed by God, and women task was designed by God too and God designed these tasks in such a way that men task is above women task such that if women tries to do that which men do, they feel so uncomfortable and may run away from it.

It is not even about feminism now.
Men recently are making a hell lot of noise saying their wives/women bring only sex to the table. So now what they want is a woman who assists them too. I think they are being selfish.
When THEY claim HEAD OF THE HOUSE they should own and shoulder every responsibility that comes with it with their full chest.


Almost every woman now works in offices, shops and what have you. Yet they still maintain the home, cook, clean, carry pregnancies and care for the kids while still working.

They should cut women some slacks, abeg. If e easy make them do am.

To cap it all Men still want a helping hand from their wives financially.

Nuellavanz96:
The women of my generation seem to be making as much or more money than their male counterparts.
Check out Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. More than 70% of the successful businesses there are being run by women.
Women of my generation are buying houses, lands, cars and even building for their parents.

If money is all you have to offer as a man, you are close to USE_LESSS.
*-*
I do NOT think 50:50 can work in marriage. Someone will get shortchanged, and it's almost always the woman.
*-*
Do I like the 50:50 arrangement in marriage? ABSOLUTELY NO!

OP, tell us why you don't think the 50:50 arrangement works in marriage.

Nuellavanz96:
1. It is not even about feminism now.
Men recently are making a hell lot of noise saying their wives/women bring only sex to the table. So now what they want is a woman who assists them too. I think they are being selfish.
When THEY claim HEAD OF THE HOUSE they should own and shoulder every responsibility that comes with it with their full chest.

2. Almost every woman now works in offices, shops and what have you. Yet they still maintain the home, cook, clean, carry pregnancies and care for the kids while still working. They should cut women some slacks, abeg. If e easy make them do am.
To cap it all Men still want a helping hand from their wives financially.

1. Commonsense should follow that no one has right to claim "head of the house" in a 50:50 arrangement now.

2. Those are women who like the idea of suffering and smiling. Dem no dey wan slack that is why they don't ask to be cut any.

Kobojunkie:
OP, tell us why you don't think the 50:50 arrangement works in marriage.

Is it not obvious already?
Wife will wake up in the morning to cook and prepare kids for children.
She lives for her place of work to make ends meet and she might even earn more.
Makes sure the kids are well and hearty
She does dishes and other house chores
She even contributes to buying grocies, children things and minor household stuff.
If she is pregnant, haaaaa another wahala. She will have all the pregnancy wahala and still go for antenatal and ontop continue with all that I mentioned above.

And OGA HUSBAND who still shouts I AM A MAN will come for assistance to pay school fees and other monetary assistance.

Nuellavanz96:
Is it not obvious already?
Wife will wake up in the morning to cook and prepare kids for children.
She lives for her place of work to make ends meet and she might even earn more.
Makes sure the kids are well and hearty
She does dishes and other house chores
She even contributes to buying grocies, children things and minor household stuff.
If she is pregnant, haaaaa another wahala. She will have all the pregnancy wahala and still go for antenatal and ontop continue with all that I mentioned above.

And OGA HUSBAND who still shouts I AM A MAN will come for assistance to pay school fees and other monetary assistance.

But all of what you described here does not happen or take place in a 50:50 setting.

1. Both husband and wife wake up in the morning to cook and prepare kids for school
2. Both husband and wife leave for work and contribute their agreed shared to the care and upkeep of family, leaving them each with money to store away for their own plans
3. Both husband and wife make out time to spend with the kids after work and even on the weekends.
4. Both husband and wife share the doing of chores and training of the children.
5. When wife is pregnant, her husband is there to be her support through the process and even care for her until she is able to get back on her feet again.

A man screaming that he is oga in a 50:50 situation does so as a result of a persistent delusion of sorts , and nothing else.

Una don chop belleful for this forum.

Unemployment rate in the country is quite telling on this thread.

Lol, you aren't lying.

Does this mean you want to split everything in half?

In this OP mind she thinks she has said something that is so scary.

Anyway I don't blame you sha, na stupid men I blame.

Any man that practices equality with his wife is nothing but a big fool infact an idiot. Unless she paid your groom price o. Ehen no wahala! But if na you pay her bride price you be mumu.

Some men out there will be forming that they are doing "equality" with their wife whereas na dem dey spend most of the money, dem still dey follow their wife take care of the kids and cook. Mumu men

Thats why many girls are shouting equality. If equality is practiced the right way dem no go dey fight for am

LesbianBoy:
In this OP mind she thinks she has said something that is so scary.

Anyway I don't blame you sha, na stupid men I blame.

Any man that practices equality with his wife is nothing but a big fool infact an idiot. Unless she paid your groom price o. Ehen no wahala! But if na you pay her bride price you be mumu.

Some men out there will be forming that they are doing "equality" with their wife whereas na dem dey spend most of the money, dem still dey follow their wife take care of the kids and cook. Mumu men

Thats why many girls are shouting equality. If equality is practiced the right way dem no go dey fight for am

So your argument is that a man buys his "head of household" title over a woman by paying this bride price you harp on?

Kobojunkie:
So your argument is that a man buys his "head of household" title over a woman by paying this bride price you harp on?

Yes, so what are you going to do about it

LesbianBoy:
Yes, so what are you going to do about it

I have never seen reason for whole bride price system myself, and here you gave yet one more reason why it too needs to be disappeared in order for sanity to be realized in many a marriage union.

If there are in fact men out there who believe that by paying this bride price, they purchase for themselves the right to sit as gods over their fellow human, and wife, then such a system needs to be done away with. No human should be able to purchase lordship for a price over a fellow human. That is a system that exhalts slavery.

Mmm hmm

Kobojunkie:
But all of what you described here does not happen or take place in a 50:50 setting.

1. Both husband and wife wake up in the morning to cook and prepare kids for school
2. Both husband and wife leave for work and contribute their agreed shared to the care and upkeep of family, leaving them each with money to store away for their own plans
3. Both husband and wife make out time to spend with the kids after work and even on the weekends.
4. Both husband and wife share the doing of chores and training of the children.
5. When wife is pregnant, her husband is there to be her support through the process and even care for her until she is able to get back on her feet again.

A man screaming that he is oga in a 50:50 situation does so as a result of a persistent delusion of sorts , and nothing else.

GboyegaD:
Does this mean you want to split everything in half?

Assuming there are ways to split pregnancy 4.5 months each, the proposal would have been on the table long time ago

Richy4:


Assuming there are ways to split pregnancy 4.5 months each, the proposal would have been on the table long time ago

We all go dey alright.

Aparently, this is the new world order and i advise women to get used to it. Gone are the days where men be like "Ohh Sade, you can stay at home do something petty on the side while i go out and bring the bacon". Women rebuked it and said it was supprisive and holding them back. Now, they are forced to compete in the outside world which is not respecter of their emotions and sucks out the living hell out of them. As if that is not enough, some even offer to freeze their eggs in exchange to be coporate slaves, can you imagine that shit.


Even the men young women used to snub or spit when they try to walk to them in their teenage years and saying they don't want to be with financially deficient or handicaped women. Gone are the days where all that was required was being pretty and you were good to go. Now men sure have standards and a list of them.

Kobojunkie:
But all of what you described here does not happen or take place in a 50:50 setting.

1. Both husband and wife wake up in the morning to cook and prepare kids for school
2. Both husband and wife leave for work and contribute their agreed shared to the care and upkeep of family, leaving them each with money to store away for their own plans
3. Both husband and wife make out time to spend with the kids after work and even on the weekends.
4. Both husband and wife share the doing of chores and training of the children.
5. When wife is pregnant, her husband is there to be her support through the process and even care for her until she is able to get back on her feet again.

A man screaming that he is oga in a 50:50 situation does so as a result of a persistent delusion of sorts , and nothing else.

To top off the delusion, there are men who depend on the wife as breadwinner who lack the intelligence to understand that in such a situation, you cannot be slamming your fist on the the granite and calling yourself the man of the house at every opportunity.

She will show you, and rightly so, since you are being a fool. Even me as a man, a woman can't be disrespecting me and still be depending on me to eat at the same time. It's just a basic human requirement, unless you just think women are sub-human.

Then how about wedding/marriage expenditure? Will it also be 50:50?

Quite frankly eh...
I'm all up for this arrangement, if that is what she wants, but if she wants me to be a traditional man, then I should enjoy ALL the privileges that comes with being a traditional man, and honestly, them many

Op but all these things you have listed there.. Men have been doing them and more for their wives nau since ages.. Those things are not issues for any man who loves his family and wants them to be happy and comfortable... But you see those days of men slaving for you women... It has gone. And I am glad these women are beginning to realise that sitting idle n looking pretty doesn't cut it anymore. You have to bring more to THE TABLE. You ladies are not ready for what's coming.. This is the age of Equality...

Candidlady:
Wear your helmet .... They are coming for your head!!


Although iam down with 50 50... Don't want no one telling me Ididn't bring Nada to the table!!!

@second paragraph:

A better approach would be not to marry a man whom you feel compelled to split the bills 50:50 with to prove your worth.

Nuellavanz96:
When a Nigerian man wants 50:50, he wants 50:50 in only bills. And if you as a woman agree to such, then you are a phool dear.

Let me explain the real 50:50.

1. Bills: 50:50
2. Cooking: 50:50
3. Childcare: 50:50 - when the baby is tender, you stay up this night and he stays up the following night. Yes, just pump breast milk and he will feed the baby.
When it's time for school runs, you take them, and he brings them back, or vice versa. Or you both hire nanny and split the nanny bills 50:50.

4. Domestic chores: split cleaning, laundry, market errands, etc 50:50. Or you hire a housekeeper and split the housekeeper's salary 50:50.

5. Pregnancy: all the money you lose as a result of pregnancy and childbirth, split into 2 and ask him to pay 50%.
For instance, if I was earning $6,000 per month and I got pregnant, and as a result my earnings drop to $3,000, here is the formular:
The cost of pregnancy on your earning is $6,000 - $3,000 = $3,000.
$3,000 divided by 2 = $1,500
He will pay you $1,500 per month.

I know pregnancy and childbirth takes a toll on your body. You can check out prices of cosmetic surgeries and ask him to pay half the total. Afterall, the children that "spoilt" the body belong to BOTH OF YOU. So, he will pay half to fix the body.
Or
You both look for a WILLING surrogate, then pay the surrogate 50:50.

If you look after the kids while he hangs out with the boys this weekend, the following weekend is your turn. He will look after the kids while you hang out with the girls.
Or
You can check if any of the kids' grandparents is willing to look after them for free or for a fee.
Or
You hire nanny and split the nanny bills 50:50.

6. If he draws a prenuptial agreement to secure his assets, make sure you include clauses to secure your own assets too. Don't be silly!

7. If you are doing 50:50, you must contribute 50:50 to any asset you acquire together and include BOTH FULL NAMES.

Alternatively, let him use his money to buy his assets in his name while you use your money to buy your asset in your name.

8. Kids will answer BOTH your names. That's still 50:50.

Dear ladies,
If a man suggests 50:50 to you, lay these terms down for him.

He can't share his own Traditional role with you 50:50 and refuse to share your own Traditional roles with you 50:50. That's bullshitt!

Women need to stop acting naive. It doesn't make you a good woman to allow yourself to be fooled.

PROVISION is the EASIEST thing to do.
If you ask me to choose between pregnancy, childbirth, and primary home keeper VERSUS breadwinner/provider, I'll choose breadwinner/provider. It's much more easier.

The women of my generation seem to be making as much or more money than their male counterparts.
Check out Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. More than 70% of the successful businesses there are being run by women.
Women of my generation are buying houses, lands, cars and even building for their parents.

If money is all you have to offer as a man, you are close to USE_LESSS.

*-*

I do NOT think 50:50 can work in marriage. Someone will get shortchanged, and it's almost always the woman.

*-*

Do I like the 50:50 arrangement in marriage? ABSOLUTELY NO!

you told no lies

zanshi:
Aparently, this is the new world order and i advise women to get used to it. Gone are the days where men be like "Ohh Sade, you can stay at home do something petty on the side while i go out and bring the bacon". Women rebuked it and said it was supprisive and holding them back. Now, they are forced to compete in the outside world which is not respecter of their emotions and sucks out the living hell out of them. As if that is not enough, some even offer to freeze their eggs in exchange to be coporate slaves, can you imagine that shit.


Even the men young women used to snub or spit when they try to walk to them in their teenage years and saying they don't want to be with financially deficient or handicaped women. Gone are the days where all that was required was being pretty and you were good to go. Now men sure have standards and a list of them.

Men have standards, nothing wrong with that.

But Are you your standard's standard?

That's the question we should be all be asking.

Funny OP overall.

I haven't seen a system that can ensure all marriage responsibilities apart from money can be split 50:50.

The closest system that mimicks equality of responsibility in marriage is:

A sole provider male who does the male chores + a full housewife.

The resources that drive a marriage are time & money.

For me, the major frustration of the 50:50 model (financially since the wife would still take up the traditional home making role) is the time.

Kobojunkie:
OP, tell us why you don't think the 50:50 arrangement works in marriage.

because one person will always be shortchanged.

Only a low value man will be craving equality in a union,well as far as I’m concerned I can never allow myself to be brainwashed into such,I know my roles and ready to play them to the best of my ability and if any man can’t be man enough to take up his provider role diligently then he should simply take a big L and search for women who are ready to be slaves and masculine.I surely know when to render assistance but not designed to be a provider,I will never be a fan of the 50:50 thingny,neverrrr

While I do not subscribe to the 50-50 arrangement,a woman in the marriage should take up reasonable percentage of the financial responsibilities in the home while the man should deliberately take on more house chores.
Marriage should be for reasonable people anyway.

.