thorpido:
While I do not subscribe to the 50-50 arrangement,a woman in the marriage should take up reasonable percentage of the financial responsibilities in the home while the man should deliberately take on more house chores.
Marriage should be for reasonable people anyway.

I don’t like seeing men do housechores same way I hate women as a provider.Marriage has lost it’s glory and sweetness because of all these equality and 50:50 westernised borrowed ideology and even in the present western world,marriage has become a demonic contract due to this ideology.

bukatyne:
Funny OP overall.

I haven't seen a system that can ensure all marriage responsibilities apart from money can be split 50:50.

The closest system that mimicks equality of responsibility in marriage is:

A sole provider male who does the male chores + a full housewife.

The resources that drive a marriage are time & money.

For me, the major frustration of the 50:50 model (financially since the wife would still take up the traditional home making role) is the time.

The bolded is just it basically, but as provision is now a big issue to men(possibly because of economic reasons) there's a big problem oo.


Women are working full time, providing the same money and taking care of all home chores, it does makes sense for the man to take responsibility for some of the chores too.

E. G They go out to make money for the family, the couple both come back by 7pm, oga sits down and stretches his legs, mummy does homework for the kids, makes food, bathes the children, serves oga, oga eats and later goes to bed by 9pm, madam is washing plate tucking the children in, preparing their bags / clothes for tomorrow, finally lands In bed by 11 pm and oga is saying oya open leg, if she says she's tired war, if she agrees let him sha do and go oga will vex and say she's not reaponsive.

By 4 am she's up again, prepares food packs the meal, wakes the kids, prepares them, oga just wakes up and bathes and takes care of him self. They sha go to work to make this money oo. Oga will now say she is looking older than him despite she is younger abeg how won't she look older.


The woman in this scenerio is frustrated most of the time, stressed out most of the time and one day she will just snap and that's it.

Iyaebe:
I don’t like seeing men do house chores same way I hate women as a provider.Marriage has lost it’s glory and sweetness because of all these equality and 50:50 westernised borrowed ideology and even in the present western world,marriage has become a demonic contract due to this ideology.

Some of us enjoy doing it.

thorpido:
Some of us enjoy doing it.

Well,that’s cool if it’s ok by you.

Lol, what are male chores?

bukatyne:
Funny OP overall.

I haven't seen a system that can ensure all marriage responsibilities apart from money can be split 50:50.

The closest system that mimicks equality of responsibility in marriage is:

A sole provider male who does the male chores + a full housewife.

The resources that drive a marriage are time & money.

For me, the major frustration of the 50:50 model (financially since the wife would still take up the traditional home making role) is the time.

LesbianBoy:
In this OP mind she thinks she has said something that is so scary.

Anyway I don't blame you sha, na stupid men I blame.

Any man that practices equality with his wife is nothing but a big fool infact an idiot. Unless she paid your groom price o. Ehen no wahala! But if na you pay her bride price you be mumu.

Some men out there will be forming that they are doing "equality" with their wife whereas na dem dey spend most of the money, dem still dey follow their wife take care of the kids and cook. Mumu men

Thats why many girls are shouting equality. If equality is practiced the right way dem no go dey fight for am

So he is the head of the house because he paid bride price? How much is it? If she refunds him all the money, can they switch roles?

DrFunmisticGlow:
because one person will always be shortchanged.

How so?

InTheCloudySky:
1. While I'm an advocate of women having their own income and not having entitlement mentality and I most definitely practice what I preach, men who ask or are adamant on women going 50/50, especially during marriage, are irresponsible men with questionable character. Men of quality will do their utmost best to provide for their families.

2. I don't have a problem with women contributing to their families. In fact, this is what we see nowadays. Women are often the breadwinners in their families: they earn more, the husband has an illness and they've to take on the breadwinner role, etc. But it's another thing for a man to ask or want his spouse to go 50/50 with him, especially in the absence of the above circumstances.

3. In the words of Steve Harvey, real men are supposed to do three things: provide, protect, and profess (love), and I totally agree with him. A man who is not ready to do these has no business getting married.

1. These "irresponsible" men happen to be among the majority out there ready to marry the many women of there.

2. You can't stop women from marrying such men.

3. That na Steve Harvey business be that one.

.

70 percent of successful businesses are run by women?

I hope you can say this before marriage or wedding. so he can stay or leave before he get involve in a femi nazi

Iyaebe:
I don’t like seeing men do housechores same way I hate women as a provider.Marriage has lost it’s glory and sweetness because of all these equality and 50:50 westernised borrowed ideology and even in the present western world,marriage has become a demonic contract due to this ideology.

There are possibly more true housewives in the west than in Nigeria. (At least from my observation). The 50:50 thing isn’t western borrowed ideology. It’s the result of late stage capitalism such that even those who want to do a strict traditional set up can hardly afford to. The housewives in Nigeria usually also have side businesses or a shop in front of the house.
Western housewives are housewives. They are not usually hustling on the side. Of course this is not based on a study just what I’ve seen.

By the time I split bills with my wife, come to my house and beat me.

Nonsense!

Karleb:
By the time I split bills with my wife, come to my house and beat me.

Nonsense!

A true and responsible man shouldn't split bills with his wife. Let her pick up bills by herself. All these 21st century men sef.

UyaiIncomparabl:


A true and responsible man shouldn't split bills with his wife. Let her pick up bills by herself. All these 21st century men sef.

I'm in my house, come and beat me.

Karleb:


I'm in my house, come and beat me.

Abeg, shift.

cococandy:


There are possibly more true housewives in the west than in Nigeria. (At least from my observation). The 50:50 thing isn’t western borrowed ideology. It’s the result of late stage capitalism such that even those who want to do a strict traditional set up can hardly afford to. The housewives in Nigeria usually also have side businesses or a shop in front of the house.
Western housewives are housewives. They are not usually hustling on the side. Of course this is not based on a study just what I’ve seen.

More true housewives in the west?like seriously? This is interesting, our brothers in the west like(the ones here on nairaland)made us believe otherwise.

Iyaebe:
More true housewives in the west?like seriously? This is interesting, our brothers in the west like(the ones here on nairaland)made us believe otherwise.

She is right... housewives in the west don't hire maids and drivers. They do it all by themselves. They are wonder women in aprons.

Kobojunkie:
She is right... housewives in the west don't hire maids and drivers. They do it all by themselves. They are wonder women in aprons.

Aside the driving part,I don’t really need a maid.Glad to know it cut across and contrary to what you guys made us believe here

Iyaebe:
Aside the driving part,I don’t really need a maid.Glad to know it cut across and contrary to what you guys made us believe here

Who made you believe what now?

Nigerian housewives no even fit hold candle to American housewife anyday, and you can quote me on that anyday. Even the Nigerian wife wey dey attempt to mimic them give up after a while out of exhaustion.

We are talking of women whose passion lie in being homemakers and they enjoy being just that. They didn't need to be trained or forced in anyway into it. How many Nigerian housewives are that driven?

Kobojunkie:
Who made you believe what now? Nigerian housewives no even fit hold candle to American housewife anyday, and you can quote me on that anyday. Even the Nigerian wife wey dey attempt to mimic them give up after a while out of exhaustion.

Go read comments from that panso guy.To be a housewife is a whole workload itself contrary to the belief of our Nigerian men,so It can really be exhausting but having a maid by the side won’t be a bad idea

Iyaebe:
Go read comments from that panso guy.To be a housewife is a whole workload itself contrary to the belief of our Nigerian men,so It can really be exhausting but having a maid by the side won’t be a bad idea

To be a housewife is no small job at all. :-

I honestly don't believe it is for any woman who doesn't have a real passion for it. After observing western housewives, I truly believe that not every woman is cut out to be a housewife and rightly so. Womanhood does not qualify one for such a role. I have also observed male house husbands to confirm that the taking on of such a role should have more to do with one's passion than one's gender.

Kobojunkie:
To be a housewife is no small job at all. :-

I honestly don't believe it is for any woman who doesn't have a real passion for it. After observing western housewives, I truly believe that not every women is cut out to be a housewife and rightly so. Womanhood does not qualify one for such a role. I have also observed male house husbands to confirm that the taking on of such a role should have more to do with one's passion than one's gender.

House husband? So funny,what will he be doing at home

Iyaebe:
House husband? So funny,what will he be doing at home

The very same job!

Kobojunkie:
The very same job!

Soooo Funny But I believe no man in his right sense would want to be in such situation(househusband)

Iyaebe:
More true housewives in the west?like seriously? This is interesting, our brothers in the west like(the ones here on nairaland)made us believe otherwise.

It’s more common among the white population though.
Black women have historically always been breadwinners alongside their men. From the days of slavery to Jim Crow until now. We couldn’t afford the luxury of existing or even thriving on one income. The system wasn’t set up to favor black folks like that.

But that housewife ish, yt women got it down to a science when they want to.

Iyaebe:
Soooo Funny But I believe no man in his right sense would want to be in such situation(househusband)

That's not entirely true.

First of all, not all men are bags of walking egos.

Second men get different situations and conditions to deal with like women. Reasons from unemployment, to sickness can cause even a man to chose this option. For others, it just makes sense that the man stay home to raise the kids while the wife pursues her dreams and goals.

I like to remind folks that there are no actual roles set by nature as far as marriage is concerned. We are meant to decide these things on our own.

I personally don't think a 50-50 in all things will ever be realistic in marriage.

The scale's certainly going to be tipped in some way. And to choose to live a life of 50-50 is to choose a life of frustration... desperately trying to enforce things that aren't enforceable.

So I say, best not to prescribe.

Let each person do what's best for them.

Let those who want sole providers go for men who can truly be sole providers...

Let those who want to do their equality thing, do it to the extent that satisfies their soul.

*******
For me, many of these things that people call traditional roles don't bother me.

I don't call them roles... I simply do what I find I do well, and with less difficulty.


But I don't want to be stressed, nor to be saddled with an inconsiderate man.

Also cannot indulge a man who doesn't consider it his responsibility to be the provider.

Allow me pick up the bills I want to pick up.

If there's an occasion that requires more, let me know...

...And tell me the interest you'll pay on it.

C'est fini.

Right. Because why get stuck in a mindset of one person MUST be the one to do this or that at all times because that’s what tradition demands. What happens when they genuinely can’t ? The marriage will collapse?

Kobojunkie:
That's not entirely true.

First of all, not all men are bags of walking egos.

Second men get different situations and conditions to deal with like women. Reasons from unemployment, to sickness can cause even a man to chose this option. For others, it just makes sense that the man stay home to raise the kids while the wife pursues her dreams and goals.

I like to remind folks that there are no actual roles set by nature as far as marriage is concerned. We are meant to decide these things on our own.

cococandy:


It’s more common among the white population though.
Black women have historically always been breadwinners alongside their men. From the days of slavery to Jim Crow until now. We couldn’t afford the luxury of existing or even thriving on one income. The system wasn’t set up to favor black folks like that.

But that housewife ish, yt women got it down to a science when they want to.

Complete with sticking johnny for the house, the car alimony, child support payments, restraining orders and supervised visits with the kids. Only yt chicks could have systematically beat white boys in the the MGTOW movement

Kobojunkie:
That's not entirely true.

First of all, not all men are bags of walking egos.

Second men get different situations and conditions to deal with like women. Reasons from unemployment, to sickness can cause even a man to chose this option. For others, it just makes sense that the man stay home to raise the kids while the wife pursues her Odreams and goals.

I like to remind folks that there are no actual roles set by nature as far as marriage is concerned. We are meant to decide these things on our own.

I don’t agree with the last part of your statement,should we also decide on who to get pregnant ,nurse the kids,Cook and what have you?see as far as marriage is concerned each gender has it’s role to play,men been the provider while women give CARE.Equality in marriage paves way for divorce,this is the bitter truth.