Berankis:
He is just one stubborn and unfortunate fellow.

No mind am

StilmaVsBorn2w:
Back then when my mom was warning me not to go that far when our relationship started She kept on insisting I should go for the girls in my tribe, I thought she was just been a tribalist bigot. If only I had listened

She bore me a son, he's 3years now... though her people knows me well from normal visitation..but I haven't been able to pay her bride price yet due to the hardship this regime has on us. life happened, unfortunately she got sick since February, ever since then from one hospital to another..I took several loans from people for hospital bills to the point of me looking sick myself.so sad for us we lost her last night.

I informed her elder brother who knows about all thats happening, he called me back this morning to tell me that his people told me to be prepared to marry her corpse. He went further and said if I don't pay her bride price, my boy will be taken from me and I should be ready to withstand the consequences.
I was surprised, I called for the burial arrangements not for a marriage ceremony

I blantly told him, I won't, why would I get married to her corpse. He was angry and cut the call on me.

Am more concerned about my son, please lawyer's in the house do they have any right to take my son away from me?
Even if they do am ready to give it to them, but spending money to Marry her corpse I will not.

I only brought this here, if had chance for my son whose still in my custody.

you have made a costly mistake. Ask God and your mom for forgiveness. Get close to God with prayer and stand your ground. Do not marry that corpse. Affliction shall not rise again.

T0T0fucker:

Simp assz licking niggas.

Op, nor mind this fool!

Nothing him and his family fit do you...nor go borrow money marry death body o.
Infact leave his sister for the mortuary, make you travel out live your life.

When them ready they go carry the dead body

This one is empty brain. Person wey never pay gbese get money travel out. If he like ler him run to the end of the earth. Children full here with empty brain. This guy do not know the trouble ahead of him. He go hear nwiiii if he doesn't do the needful. If na my village, he would have been reported to the deity. All these nonsense he is ranting now won't happen because he will be a living corpse. It is his kingsmen that will be coming to beg. Do you know what it take to bring a child to the world, nurse her to maturity and you came and took her? Put her in the family way and she died. You then call the family on the phone to inform them? As nwa ewu na?

duro4chang:
The reasonable advice your mama give you no take am shey na our own you go take?

See finishing...

StilmaVsBorn2w:

You here for the tribe only?
Or to give me reasonable advise?

It is not tribal war. This is culture which can never be disassociated from the case presented.

I think it's somewhere in Benue..

First of all I want to ask you where do you intend to bury her?
She not your wife, the child remains the right of her family, because you are not recognize you as their son. You don't have the right to bury....

@StilmaVsBorn2w

Please take the words from @koolest4christ close to your heart. One of the best advice out here.

I totally understand why you're feeling this way. I mean you just lost a soulmate after seriously battling with Mr. Death for her through your finances. Today you're in debt over a lost battle and then this whole shit from her family.

I understand nobody is concerned about your emotional state at the moment you're grieving. It's not wrong to say this shouldn't have been the time to bring up all these shitty talk of getting married to her dead body. Whether you believe in superstitions or God is immaterial at this point. It's equally immaterial if you're not afraid of the girl's family bullying or not.

What's most important right now is your show of respect for your son's mother. I pray God softens your heart to just give to ceaser what belongs to it.

Rally around your friends for help. Let them know the shit you found yourself in. Call the girl's elder brother back and ask for their Dad's phone number. Talk to them in the most polite and sobber way. Let them see you grieving genuinely. Make him understand how indebted you are over her medical bills. Ask him for favour so they'll lower their demands from you. Tell him you're not in the best frame of mind for this kind of conversation but for the love and respect you have for them and their late daughter, you just have to do this.

Remember, this is not being cowardice. It's wisdom. If not for the love and affection you have for your late wife, then

Do it for your first child ever!

koolest4christ:
Sorry for the loss my brother.
Being stubborn sometimes is not good. You can only brag or being boastful that you are not afraid of the devil if you have the spirit of God in you. In your case, you have already defiled your body by committing fornication and you never can tell if she died because of your sins. You might have promised God never to involve yourself in any immoral stuff but look at where you find yourself.

My advice for you is, calm down, go back to your mum if she is alive, apologize to her and ask her for direction. She or your elder ones will tell you what to do. Youthful energy will fail you when the time comes.

Keeping her in your house all this while is a grievous offense to you, your mum, herself and her family and then God Almighty.

My brother, if you are not at peace with God, devil will take you for a ride and making you stubborn is the surest tactics devil is using to destroy your destiny and render your boy orphan (God forbid).

Do the burial rite, go back to God and start again. Your future is bright.

God bless you.

Ilaje1:


I guess they want their daughter's body to rot in mortuary. Let the authority (through a lawyer) be aware, bury the girl (after a reasonable notification given to the family) out of respect for her. Or take the highway like her family by leaving the corpse in the mortuary, since family won't allow him to bury her, and move on with his son. Nothing will happen to him. It is their loss.

Bros when you want to marry please do the needful or else you can't stand it, believe me you will marry her corpse. It's bot about hard man or knowing a lawyer

dawnomike:
Since you refused to do the needful when she was alive; You've got to go and pay her dowry or leave the boy as their daughter's son as she was never your wife... It is the right thing to do in the igbo culture

.

I'm not Ibo but it's good to respect the tradition of others, especially those we're interacting with. Unfortunately the economy might have had its toll on you but just try to raise the fund to settle them so her spirit may have a final rest. But the family too shouldn't be malicious about it so everyone could be happy and still remain as friends thereafter.

StilmaVsBorn2w:

I don't believe in curses, A man can not define my fate in life..I was more concerned about my son that's why I brought it here.
I fear no man

With this response,it is clear the story is a hoax. People stop disturbing yourselves on these super story.

StilmaVsBorn2w:

Let them bring it on.
I said I won't, I can't marry a corpse

OP, it's quite obvious you're a very stubborn person. From flaunting your mom's advice, to finally getting yourself in the mess she was trying to help you dodge, to you bringing it up on this forum and thwarting members' advice.
I assure you, you're on ''self-destruct mode''.
You better go find kinsmen wey go follow you go pay that bride price, unless, of course, you wan add ''corpse kidnap'' to your already many sins.

StilmaVsBorn2w:
Back then when my mom was warning me not to go that far when our relationship started She kept on insisting I should go for the girls in my tribe, I thought she was just been a tribalist bigot. If only I had listened

She bore me a son, he's 3years now... though her people knows me well from normal visitation..but I haven't been able to pay her bride price yet due to the hardship this regime has on us. life happened, unfortunately she got sick since February, ever since then from one hospital to another..I took several loans from people for hospital bills to the point of me looking sick myself.so sad for us we lost her last night.

I informed her elder brother who knows about all thats happening, he called me back this morning to tell me that his people told me to be prepared to marry her corpse. He went further and said if I don't pay her bride price, my boy will be taken from me and I should be ready to withstand the consequences.
I was surprised, I called for the burial arrangements not for a marriage ceremony

I blantly told him, I won't, why would I get married to her corpse. He was angry and cut the call on me.

Am more concerned about my son, please lawyer's in the house do they have any right to take my son away from me?
Even if they do am ready to give it to them, but spending money to Marry her corpse I will not.

I only brought this here, if had chance for my son whose still in my custody.

Sorry bro
Its a trade off between marrying or custody of the child, it's just paying the bride price and not big wedding, even in my locality it's still somehow enforce.
On legal basics you can claim to be the father of the child when you have not fully married her officially.
There's is common saying mother are the owner of the child, and in that case you have not own her.
My two cents.

StilmaVsBorn2w:

I don't believe in curses, A man can not define my fate in life..I was more concerned about my son that's why I brought it here.
I fear no man

u sound so so selfish to me … u are supposed to be sober u lost ur swt hrt , d mother of ur son …. U don’t have conscience a woman who loved and lived with u even upon ur poverty status & mentality till her death… ur here more concerned about her son… a woman u didn’t pay a dine….
Disgraceful

sweetjohn:
Oga, Africa women don't toast men. No woman take any woman son without paying her bride price and got pregnant for him. rather it's the foolish men that deceived the woman with unquantified lies of love, got them pregnant without paying their bride price.

You should know that woman unlike men are love machine. They have the heart of love and as such are vulnerable to scammers men. Don't blame them much for following their heart out of pure love. Rather it's the stupid man that should be blame bc he took advantage of her innocency. In case like this, if the law got involved, it's the man that will be guilty. That's criminal to take someone daughter without the knowledge of the family

Who says African woman don't toast man? She was an adult. Was the girl forced to agree to the guy advancement? Bride price is a curural thing, in some culture it is the woman that pays groom price. My point is that nothing is set in stone. Because those before us believed the norm is to pay price doesn't mean we can't change it.

Any girl of 18 yrs can decide for herself. There is no law that says you must pay a dowry before you can impregnate someone or be impregnated by someone. There is no law that stipulated that you have to pay or collect dowry before having sex with someone's daughter or son. There is no law that says you must marry someone that you impregnate or marry someone that impregnated you whether alive or dead. So he will NOT be guilt in a court of law.

Someone should help him financially

U must do it shebi u know how to be stubborn

EzePaschal:


This one is empty brain. Person wey never pay gbese get money travel out. If he like ler him run to the end of the earth. Children full here with empty brain. This guy do not know the trouble ahead of him. He go hear nwiiii if he doesn't do the needful. If na my village, he would have been reported to the deity. All these nonsense he is ranting now won't happen because he will be a living corpse. It is his kingsmen that will be coming to beg. Do you know what it take to bring a child to the world, nurse her to maturity and you came and took her? Put her in the family way and she died. You then call the family on the phone to inform them? As nwa ewu na?

Nna my brother ,i tire,some people have no fear for anything...all this baby boy them,they think social media de help for this kind thing.. the more he delays ,the more the money increases,the more the problem increases,its better now that no ear , much ear have heard it,its even the op mind to come post it here..i blame the girl sha,it doesn't seem like this guy has anything respect for her both in live and death

StilmaVsBorn2w:
Back then when my mom was warning me not to go that far when our relationship started She kept on insisting I should go for the girls in my tribe, I thought she was just been a tribalist bigot. If only I had listened

She bore me a son, he's 3years now... though her people knows me well from normal visitation..but I haven't been able to pay her bride price yet due to the hardship this regime has on us. life happened, unfortunately she got sick since February, ever since then from one hospital to another..I took several loans from people for hospital bills to the point of me looking sick myself.so sad for us we lost her last night.

I informed her elder brother who knows about all thats happening, he called me back this morning to tell me that his people told me to be prepared to marry her corpse. He went further and said if I don't pay her bride price, my boy will be taken from me and I should be ready to withstand the consequences.
I was surprised, I called for the burial arrangements not for a marriage ceremony

I blantly told him, I won't, why would I get married to her corpse. He was angry and cut the call on me.

Am more concerned about my son, please lawyer's in the house do they have any right to take my son away from me?
Even if they do am ready to give it to them, but spending money to Marry her corpse I will not.

I only brought this here, if had chance for my son whose still in my custody.

My dear friend, the money you're going to pay for bride price won't be much. Its just a token.

ItS done in my place but not my local government.

No need to drag with your in-laws.
Use wisdom and settle with them.

You're even lucky they didn't accuse you of killing their daughter.

RIP you your wife.

Op, I strongly hope you are not a Yoruba, Cos, if you are then God has catch you. Of all the angels in Yorubaland, you went ahead for a yam legged flatbed headed girl. Go marry her dead body already. Nonsense!

StilmaVsBorn2w:
Back then when my mom was warning me not to go that far when our relationship started She kept on insisting I should go for the girls in my tribe, I thought she was just been a tribalist bigot. If only I had listened

She bore me a son, he's 3years now... though her people knows me well from normal visitation..but I haven't been able to pay her bride price yet due to the hardship this regime has on us. life happened, unfortunately she got sick since February, ever since then from one hospital to another..I took several loans from people for hospital bills to the point of me looking sick myself.so sad for us we lost her last night.

I informed her elder brother who knows about all thats happening, he called me back this morning to tell me that his people told me to be prepared to marry her corpse. He went further and said if I don't pay her bride price, my boy will be taken from me and I should be ready to withstand the consequences.
I was surprised, I called for the burial arrangements not for a marriage ceremony

I blantly told him, I won't, why would I get married to her corpse. He was angry and cut the call on me.

Am more concerned about my son, please lawyer's in the house do they have any right to take my son away from me?
Even if they do am ready to give it to them, but spending money to Marry her corpse I will not.

I only brought this here, if had chance for my son whose still in my custody.

You are a mumu. Why are you scared of her family. They have no legal right over the boy since you are alive. Just make sure they dont have access to the boy at all. Dont let them see him. He is your son even if u have not married the mother. Dont give the boy to her people. Let your mother have the boy for now till u are through with the burial. After that relocate to another house, change the school of the boy and dont have any contact with her family. Also tell ur family not to disclose any information about you to them. It's that simple . And by the way you dont have to follow any tradition of marrying a corpse. Simple.

StilmaVsBorn2w:

Let them bring it on.
I said I won't, I can't marry a corpse

Ok, let's see how you will burry someone's daughter without their consent.

ImaIma1:


I can't force you.

You are just here lashing out because you know you are in a tight corner and will most likely have to do the marriage rites.

What are your people saying? That should give you a clue whether to continue being stubborn or just go ahead.

The guy has not done the first thing he needs to to do, which is, go meet the elders in HIS family for advice.

I pity these young generation guys

Dem think say life na ludo.

Like someone said, it's going to be an uphill battle even if he is a general overseer of a ministry.

He should allow the elders in his family mediate. But of course, this kind of person sees the old people in his family as scum

Actually she is not your wife because there is no evidence of marriage between you and her.

So, pls just calm down, inform you people to schedule a meeting with her family for forgiveness.

Otherwise, the outcome might be an everlasting regret.

Thank you

Obinna666:

Nna my brother ,i tire,some people have no fear for anything...all this baby boy them,they think social media de help for this kind thing.. the more he delays ,the more the money increases,the more the problem increases,its better now that no ear , much ear have heard it,its even the op mind to come post it here..i blame the girl sha,it doesn't seem like this guy has anything respect for her both in live and death

If you are looking at it from the respect angle, if the girl respected her family she wouldn't move in with a man.

Poverty na bastard see matter wey uncle don go buy

You must marry that girl Oo. U don go deceive her,she leave her papa house now she's dead and you wan leave the son for them because of poverty

Bro the marriage no go dey expensive like other marriage. Go and marry her corpse. Wether you want the child or not.


Dem tell una make una dey avoid love until una make am but una no dey hear,u no even afford better hospital for her. U don go use poverty kill her. Wait till she start tormenting you, foolish boy.

sammirano:
Op, I strongly hope you are not a Yoruba, Cos, if you are then God has catch you. Of all the angels in Yorubaland, you went ahead for a yam legged flatbed headed girl. Go marry her dead body already. Nonsense!

Who is this odetic mumu.

blairlady:




Even in Akwa Ibom State

Thank you for this insight. I should have a second thought right now. So that I don't find my self in a mess as the OP.

Ilaje1:


If you are looking at it from the respect angle, if the girl respected her family she wouldn't move in with a man.

Be honest,love de do many things,women if it comes to that aspect ,no de understand that side,once a woman fall inlove with a man,her family na trash to her especially if pregnancy involve and maybe the mumu guy de decieve am that tomorrow i will come and see ur people..some men are like that ,i will come and see ur people and 10yrs go pass ,i blame the girls buts she gone but for the op to have the guts,nna this guy ,if this thing na real story ,this guy no even know wetin em enter.its cheaper to marry a girl when she is alive than when she is dead ,and if u come form stubbornness ,e de triple

Ilaje1:


Who says African woman don't toast man? She was an adult. Was the girl forced to agree to the guy advancement? Bride price is a curural thing, in some culture it is the woman that pays groom price. My point is that nothing is set in stone. Because those before us believed the norm is to pay price doesn't mean we can't change it.

Any girl of 18 yrs can decide for herself. There is no law that says you must pay a dowry before you can impregnate someone or be impregnated by someone. There is no law that stipulated that you have to pay or collect dowry before having sex with someone's daughter or son. There is no law that says you must marry someone that you impregnate or marry someone that impregnated you whether alive or dead. So he will NOT be guilt in a court of law.

Seriously, No law against stealing someone daughter. are you for real. Oga, if you are living with a woman that is not yet your wife, go and do the needful now o bc should the girl die in your hand. If the family knows their right and took it up with law, you are a gonar. A word is enough for the wise

Funkybabee:
Someone should help him financially
U must do it shebi u know how to be stubborn

would really appreciate

StilmaVsBorn2w:

I can't borrow money to marry her corpse, never
The debts I borrowed from her treatment up to a millionaire is still in my neck, haven't even paid dine from it.

There is nothing like marrying corpse! What kind of nonsense suggestion is that? Life happens. It's a pity she died before they got married, but so be it.

If she died on expressway n ko?

If it was by force to marry someone because of bearing a son, we wouldn't have single mothers and baby mamas all over the place.

My brother holdbyour ground. They equally cannot take the child from you.