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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? (3683 Views)
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Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Charlex23(m): 5:18pm On May 06, 2022 |
Good Evening Nairalanders. So this would be my first time posting anything about my personal life here. I'll try to be declamatory and concise in my write up. So I happened to have known her since 2018 and we started off as being friends,met her on Facebook, finally got a chance to meet her in person and luckily for me she stays very close to me in Lagos. To be honest we really have this bond and connection whenever we have a conversation, and I'll say she's a very lovely person with a good heart. Hardly a day or two passes by without the both of us keeping in touch. She's everything I would ever desire in a woman. Even though she's just my friend, there's this uniqueness about her that just sweeps me off my feet, the thing is that she isn't a materialistic type of girl, she's down to earth, supportive,loyal and always cares about me so much tho we are not dating. Despite the fact that we've been real close and I loved her since I set my eyes on her, I intentionally never wanted to display my love for her, most at times I have this urge to open up to her and express my feelings, but I don't want to be seen as being a weak man. I wanted to be sure if the love she had for me is mutual before I think of expressing mine. I actually withheld this feelings in me for about 3 years or thereabout. So the thing is i study in a federal university in Nigeria. Owerri to be precise, and I'm currently in my final year, but due to the strike I've been at home for some months. So last week I was having a conversation with her on what's app and she was like professing her love for me and how she really started developing feelings for me for some time now, deep down I was so excited, it was like a dream come true for me because I've always wanted her to say this. She asked me if we could start up something and see where it leads us to, but I just had to tell her I'll have a thought about it. Now the problem is that she'll be travelling to Canada by August for her studies,and I'm really scared I might eventually lose her when she get there, obviously she'll meet guys who are better than me and might eventually succumb to one of those niggas over there, because I know girls are vunerable. you know I had to discuss my insecurities with her, but she promised me she won't succumb to any of them and that she loves me and can't do that to me. Mind you she's still a virgin and I'll be her first boyfriend, besides she's too beautiful and I know that guys won't let her rest, she always tells me how guys always pester her and all that, but because she loves me that's the reason she dosen't want to give in to any of their request. She's just so beautiful that even my mind won't even be at rest when she's not around me. She has been all around me since yesterday and promising me she'll be mine alone and everything, but the truth of the matter is I'm scared. I so much love her, but I just want to be sure I don't have any regrets. I know she loves me too, because there have been difficult situations I've been through in the past but she salvaged it. I have good intentions for her and I want to make her my wife if possible, probably when I'm done with studies. if I was still a play boy like I was previously,I would just want a taste of the cookie and run away, but ever since this girl came into my life as an important figure, all these bad boy traits in me just vanished, I can't really tell how . Before now, I don't even have time for love, I just do my normal hookup and please myself.But I'm just scared of her leaving me if she eventually gets there, besides the long distance relationship is stressful but I believe she's a good girl and it's worth fighting for. Do u guys feel I should give this a chance and just see how things would go? Please I need your advice? 1 Like |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by MrBrownJay1(m): 5:20pm On May 06, 2022 |
A) telling a woman how you feel about her is NOT a show of weakness...in the contrary! B) long distance r/ship are not that easy to maintain, especially for people who dont know one another. best is to let her go, keep in touch as friends, and if ever she comes back (and you guys feel the same way) continue where you left off. C) stop being insecure thinking that men abroad are automatically better than you....thats a fallacy, and this type of low self esttem insecurity has to go from your head. be the best you can be and basta, stop trying to anticipate who/what/where/how she is gonna be over there. ultimately, if she meets a dude there and has a r/ship, so be it... when she comes back, you evaluate the person she is and decide if you want to continue. D) trying to stop her from living her Canada adventure fully is not only wrong, its childish...stop trying to held that girl down...let her fly away...if she really cares for you, she'll know what to do. E) you gotta deal with your own insecurities... dont try to put that on her and emotionally blackmail that girl under the guise of future wife/marriage bla bla bla FINALLY nobody knows what will happen in Canada. there are so many variable that will come into play, and the life she lives there will be a culture shock that may change her for the best/worst...and sadly, you might not be included in that new outlook of life of hers. but rest assured that trying to tie her down wont solve anything...especially when she is 10000kms away! 22 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Nonexisting: 5:24pm On May 06, 2022 |
You people are still children so this madness called love will clear una eyes soon especially hers. "Send your daughter to school, she will come back grown" is a quote by Ice Cube. You will understand the quote by the time she graduates from that her abroad school. 9 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Charlex23(m): 5:29pm On May 06, 2022 |
MrBrownJay1:Thanks boss.... I think you have a valid point. |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Nobody: 5:35pm On May 06, 2022 |
A lady who chose to have you as her lover despite going overseas is not vulnerable, you are the insecure one. Heaven knows why she wants to be tied to you when there is a broad pool of fishes to pick from in Canada. If you know you can't survive the distance and anxiety just let it go. 5 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by fikayormi(m): 5:37pm On May 06, 2022 |
Omo no spacing at all in your write up , now read what you wrote is it easy to comprehend? Anyway why are you insecure by comparing yourself with those she is going to meet in Canada? Don’t you believe in yourself that you can succeed? Stop the useless comparison son But your fear is somehow right Have this mindset that you are going to lose her when she get there cos to see a Nigeria girl that will still be loyal in that case is next to impossible . So my advice is this son , ENJOY THE MOMENT ! Hope for the best but expect the worst 1 Like |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Charlex23(m): 5:40pm On May 06, 2022 |
Persephone1:I didn't say she's vulnerable. I actually meant most ladies are vunerable. Besides my ex girlfriend this was the exact reason we broke up, she travelled out and the r/ship died a natural death.I'm just trying to prevent this from happening the second time. It's not like I'm insecure, i only need this constant re assurance from her that she would abide by her words. Talk is cheap |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Ballzproblemm: 5:43pm On May 06, 2022 |
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Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by MAGG0T(m): 5:47pm On May 06, 2022 |
![]() we are about losing a soul to "sniper de Pesticide"... Before this OP knows what hit him, it might be too late.... Explore her honeypot and wait for an inevitable doom, when she's travelled out to study.... Don't say Magg0t didn't warn you, fool 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Fakbrown: 5:48pm On May 06, 2022 |
Brah for me I don't see any future in your relationship with her, just hit the cookie, if she Dae dat side if Sapa do you fit just Dae bill her, something fit come out, I guess it won't last long, because out of sight is out of mind your relationship will just fade away with time, but don't forget to bill her |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by CandyOps(m): 5:50pm On May 06, 2022 |
Try nack sha before she japa because I know say Na where all this talk dey go but maybe u never get the mind. Also use protection bro. Pro Tip- get Studded condoms. It's a bit a thicker than normal CD. And the reason you should go for that one in particular is because as your body dey sweet you like dis na 2 mins you go take cum once you penetrate You should know your way around pussyville so no long talk, champ. If you de nack am, sha know say u dey do am on behalf on all the real niggas on Nairaland. And if you live with parents then make plans to book a hotel room. But sha tell am on time make you no go waste money for nothing. You fit tell am say make she tell her parents say she wan go vigil then u go kolobi am all night 4 Likes
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Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Nobody: 5:50pm On May 06, 2022 |
Charlex23:Oh! Now I understand your fears. I've seen cases of loyal women who end up playing major roles in migrating their Men overseas to join them. She may be one of them. Dude, long or short distance relationship nothing is certain. However if you know you can't deal, let it go. It's not a crime. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Yadid(m): 5:52pm On May 06, 2022 |
If you don't give it a try, how will you get a chance for it to come good? How will you know if it could work? You can hold on to your insecurities and let her go, but you most likely will end up with regrets about not even giving it a chance. Give it a chance and you might win or get heartbroken. Don't give it a chance and you will have your fears and insecurities with some regrets sprinkled on them in a while. The choice? All yours. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by boxer022(m): 5:55pm On May 06, 2022 |
I have read through your long writing and have a question for you. You have fears that when she goes to Canada for studies that certainly she will see someone better than you and your intentions for her is to make her your wife, how does she feel concerning this intention of yours? She has assured you that she will be yours alone, are the both of you comfortable with long distance relationship? I really see love in your eyes also in hers, the final decision lies with you as you have been desiring this for a long time. If you really love her and want to be with her, there is no barrier stopping you from it. Let Love Lead. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Charlex23(m): 5:59pm On May 06, 2022 |
MAGG0T:Lol. You're really a joke aren't you! Like how would I take sniper bcs of a woman. I don't get. I really don't let my emotions control me at all |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Babaalajo(m): 6:00pm On May 06, 2022 |
You have nothing to loose here bro 1 Like |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Charlex23(m): 6:02pm On May 06, 2022 |
boxer022:I've spoken to her, and she's like there's no problem with the long distance relationship. That she could cope with it. She's even thinking of forfeiting the trip to Canada, just to stay here with me, but I really don't want that. I'll try to give it a Chance |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Medianna(f): 6:03pm On May 06, 2022 |
If you like take relationship advise from those redpillers OYO is your case. They can't get abroad girls like you anyway. You letting go even before trying is a 'no no no' for me. We all have our fears and insecurities in life. Nothing is certain. This one that beauty is confusing you. I hope you're alright.if you look around you'll see that the beautiful ones plenty no be small. And there is nothing special about guy following her. As a young lady if guys don't flaunt around you, you should go for deliverance 3 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by boxer022(m): 6:06pm On May 06, 2022 |
Charlex23:For no reason whatsoever will she forfeit this trip as it is very essential to her. Since she doesn't have any problem with long distance relationship then fire on. |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Charlex23(m): 6:11pm On May 06, 2022 |
Medianna:Well it's absolutely normal for guys to flaunt around a young lady ryt? Thanks for the input @ medianna. I'll give it a trial |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Charlex23(m): 6:12pm On May 06, 2022 |
boxer022:No she won't forfeit the trip. Thanks brotherly. I'll go ahead |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by okoroemeka(m): 6:13pm On May 06, 2022 |
Charlex23:my candid and elderly advice for you is to simply tell the girl how much you love her,sweep her off her feet and make her feel like a queen,a girl like that is hard to find,don't waste time after reading this, immediately tell her how much you love her more than your mother, believe me it may be your ticket to Canada. 5 Likes |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by boxer022(m): 6:16pm On May 06, 2022 |
Charlex23:Please do go ahead with Love. You are most welcome. |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Oblivionz5(m): 7:26pm On May 06, 2022 |
Charlex23: Don’t do it man .. I’ve been there. She promised me with her life lmao. We broke up last year October when she declared she wasn’t feeling our vibes anymore. I decided to cut it then to avoid embarrassment. That breakup ended 4 years of friendship and 2years relationship. I met her from Facebook too. It’s really like your story. So if you really want to be together it should be when you’re both done with school. I cannot date any girl till I finish my schooling tho
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Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by cavreek: 7:40pm On May 06, 2022 |
Try as much as possible to love from a distance if thats possible but if she gave u assurance den I think u're just been insecure If I were u I will be exploring the option of getting a scholarship in Canada so dat when it clicks 'da clique will continue' |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by RightToReject(m): 8:01pm On May 06, 2022 |
Imagine yourself not having feelings for her; she not being physically beautiful and without having the Canadian sojourn prospect, if you do not see yourself considering her as of one the best things that have happened to you and that is deserving of being standing strongly for in any just circumstance or will not mind calling off her bluff if she wittingly violates any of your set-standards in the presence of the mentioned benefits, know that you do not mean well for her and leave her alone before you wound yourself and/or wound her. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by confidant: 8:59pm On May 06, 2022 |
You won’t loose her. Go for it If she’s a good girl. Your write up shows you want a perfect relationship. You won’t know until you try. She’s already a step ahead of you in preparing you for the future. Except if you don’t want living outside Nigeria. When you eventually finish uni you will see how difficult this country is. Give the relationship a try. If it doesn’t work.. at least you learnt something. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by shege45: 9:15pm On May 06, 2022 |
Charlex23:the truth is, she will leave you. Especially when she dey find permanent stay for the country, then one fine guy wey get paper go just wyne am. If na you, you no go follow d guy? |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Uniquetani1(f): 9:20pm On May 06, 2022 |
Love matter everywhere 2 Likes
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Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by SarutobiEky(m): 9:57pm On May 06, 2022 |
Awww Puppy love. ![]() |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by Nyascobar1414: 10:29pm On May 06, 2022 |
@Op no fear naa... Cos the only men she go see for canada na men wey go pop her cherry; she ft bring the remaining come gv you sha... Asa simp u are. |
Re: Should I Go Ahead With This Relationship? by TayusKilzEasyjay(m): 10:31pm On May 06, 2022 |
How many times you wan write beautiful for this your write up OP Mtcheew |
Finally, I Lost My 4months Old Son / . / This Is Why I Date Dark Ladies
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