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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Am Not Attracted To My Wife. (2098 Views)
I Am Not Getting Attracted To Her Sexually / My Wife Says She Is Not Sexually Attracted To Me / I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? (2) (3) (4)
Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Ajokol: 4:33pm On May 14, 2022 |
Please I need honest advice from matured and married people here, I have been married for two years, I didn't date my wife. I met her in the village and we got talking, we were both in our late thirties and got married after three months, my wife is not ugly and I won't say she is beautiful, she is just a normal woman. She does her wifey duties and she has good character. The issue is, I am not sexually attracted to her, we don't flow emotionally, we don't flow on gisting level, our level of exposure differ. We only have sex to get her pregnant, we don't have kids yet, am not happy. How can I handle this? |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Aboks(m): 4:36pm On May 14, 2022 |
You see ur life u r not attracted to her and u married her or u are here to seek attention 4 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by rickpat(m): 4:45pm On May 14, 2022 |
three months is enough for you to know if you are sexually attracted to her,know if you two can gist at same level,know if you two share same or any kind of interest...maybe you are looking for a reason to quit...my advise to you is to spend more time with her.. learn to share her interest with her...you must not like what she likes but you will share those moments she loves with her....eg if she likes local movies...watch it with her...learn about the movies and gist it with her....lead by example oga...if she sees you doing that...as long as she is a good woman that loves her family,she will start sharing your own interest with you as well...eg if you watch football,she might just start watching too....take things easy..since you didn't date her...DATE HER INSIDE THE MARRIAGE...start everything over again but this time inside the marriage...bro good woman no easy to see o...as you say she good,try your best to make things work...teach her, lead her... complain less...she will learn....if you build that attraction and companionship overtime sexually attraction will boost as well...good luck 16 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by LoudlyMouthed: 4:46pm On May 14, 2022 |
Ajokol: ![]() |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by rickpat(m): 4:46pm On May 14, 2022 |
weda he dey seek attention or not... person fit dey here when dey pass through similar matter sha |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Nobody: 5:06pm On May 14, 2022 |
You are in this dilemma because you "didn't date" . Most of what is lacking in your relationship is discovered and formed when people date. Your wife is a good woman, form what you lack with her. If you divorce her , you may end up with a sexually attractive jezebel. Be wise! 5 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by cavreek: 5:13pm On May 14, 2022 |
OP, sorry to say this but she is intellectually not in ur level hence the reason u two don't flow well Pls try and upgrade her, u see one of the reasons why school is important and I believe with that her level of exposure will increase 3 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by olabrinks(f): 5:38pm On May 14, 2022 |
Manage her like that. Nothing outside that you are looking for. Make her sexually attractive that’s why she’s your wife. |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by attacker321: 5:47pm On May 14, 2022 |
You have to make it work. Like you said, she's not a bad woman and not ugly so make her and the marriage whatever you want it to be. |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by liminna(m): 5:50pm On May 14, 2022 |
For white people, your wife must be your soul mate. Find freinds and outsource some of your expectations. If shes the teacheable type you can upgrade her gradually. |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by luscioustrish(f): 5:58pm On May 14, 2022 |
Then date her, try to know her better. 1 Like |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Nekky5(f): 6:01pm On May 14, 2022 |
Hmmm!!!!! this is serious but then just as @rickpat said, get those reasons behind you and build your wife to the standard you desire of her. Engage her into your life totally, spend money on her and make her see the need to upgrade her level intellectually and all would be fine. it is most times hard to get a 'full package for that kind of market'. 2 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Nobody: 6:16pm On May 14, 2022 |
Nekky5:can you Bleep me in anal style |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Nobody: 6:17pm On May 14, 2022 |
luscioustrish:can we Bleep my dog |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by ibechris(m): 6:18pm On May 14, 2022 |
To be honest,I don't have anything to say to u. Now that u are not happy, what do u want to do now? To make u happy I guess? U have to train your wife to your level, that is all. Happiness is subjective and I can bet u,in Nigeria few people are happy. |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Nobody: 6:40pm On May 14, 2022 |
. 1 Like |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by 234GT(m): 6:50pm On May 14, 2022 |
You don't know what God has done for you. If the woman gives you peace of mind, please love and accept her. 2 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by RightToReject(m): 6:57pm On May 14, 2022 |
In an instance like this, your best bet is to build a mental connection - which is better, healthier and more lasting than an emotional connection - with her. Mental transmutation. The first step towards realizing this is by consciously embracing a sense of fairness; the fact that she has not wittingly done anything spitefully to destroy whatever you hold dear, citing your submission, will make it easier for you. You can get this done by magnifying one single attribute she possesses; gradually and subconsciously, a mutual mental connection will take place and you will begin to see her as the best thing that has ever happened to you. 3 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Bukola94: 6:58pm On May 14, 2022 |
rickpat:u took it out of my mouth. Believe me things are happening. This kind of thing is rampant |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by rickpat(m): 7:00pm On May 14, 2022 |
Bukola94:very very rampant amongst couples |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Alapojames: 8:36pm On May 14, 2022 |
The marriage na interview? Since you say you no date her... She tick all the boxes in the interview abi? |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by 9japride(m): 8:49pm On May 14, 2022 |
You will be shock when someone else treats her nicely with enough love in addition to buying her nice fitted cloths, its by then your eyes will clear. All those celebrities you see looking good are made possible by good clothes, makeups and good living. 2 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by frozen70(f): 9:00pm On May 14, 2022 |
Ajokol: You have to accept what you have because you made the choice and went ahead with it, even when you know vividly that there is no affection between both of you, in fact there was no connection or link while even the marriage was been planned You have lived in the city where you had girl friends that spiced your life and you had good times with them But when it was time to settle down you went to the village because those city girls are not just good enough You can adjust your taste and choices for you to deal with this unpleasant situations Teach her how you want her to be, engage her in to discussions that are more about social life Relax and be patient for her to become pregnant that's if your sperm counts are perfect Take her to yaba market you will get nice dresses and Jeans trousers that will make her look realy casual and nice looking too Give her money to go to salon and make good hair once a month Speak more of English than your local dialect What I mean by above comments is that, You should brush her up so that she can be upgraded Get her a job so far she will be living the house in the morning to come back in the evening She will see her mates and she will also learn few things Just guide her If you don't follow this simple ideas You will end up n the hands of those city girls you dropped just because you want to marry from the village and once they realize that you are not enjoying your marriage, she will take over and give you the vibes that will spice your life up 3 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Channah1(f): 9:05pm On May 14, 2022 |
I guess because she's not the spoilt type that will dress like a harlot to seduce you around the house and probably lick your anus that's why she's not attractive. You should have married the slutty ones in the city that will give you what you want and still be servicing other men outside. I've said it, you men don't deserve a good and reserved woman. You see the type that was offering her body as payment to an MC she's hiring for her wedding? That's the kind of lady that fits the men of this generation. Maybe if they even check you now, you're not good looking or sexy, worst still, you may even be short. Excuse me abeg! |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Kriss216: 9:07pm On May 14, 2022 |
olabrinks:Dem dey manage wife ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Kriss216: 9:09pm On May 14, 2022 |
Channah1:Yen yen yen yen Na so person go come marry you now, you'll be cooking disgusting looking tomato melon soup and you expect such man to be sexually attracted to you... Nonsense! 4 Likes |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Channah1(f): 9:15pm On May 14, 2022 |
Kriss216: You must be very stupid. You hear? Just because I gave you audience the other day should not give the right to start mentioning me anyhow here. Ok? . That guy was right about you afterall. Don't ever mention me again. You nitwit. |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Truvelisback(m): 10:00pm On May 14, 2022 |
Ajokol:U are not attracted to ur wife or u aren't happy abt ur childless marriage? 2 Likes 1 Share
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Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by nautybride: 1:45am On May 15, 2022 |
![]() Buy seductive dresses for her. Do a make over, take her to a spa. Then take her out to movies, eateries etc. A good woman she is, you say. Take care of her. Turn her to a woman that can please you on bed. |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by Jman06(m): 1:52am On May 15, 2022 |
See all these hypocritical ladies here advising op to tolerate and start *teaching " an old woman like op's wife, flip the coin now and they'll not advocate similar patience, tolerance and guidance. Many of them will even encourage the wife to divorce the man. Hypocrites! A woman in her late thirties fa. I blame op for marrying such an mgbeke. Even if you want to marry such class of girl, why not marry the one that is still young and fresh with some sexual appeals to make up for the other stuff she lacks. So that when you're teaching her, we'll know you're teaching a child. 1 Like |
Re: Am Not Attracted To My Wife. by socialmediaman: 2:37am On May 15, 2022 |
Be Careful With Helping Strangers -someone I Assisted With Accommodation Almost / Having Serious Problems With My Late Husband's Family. / About To Search For A Nigeria Wife
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