Please I need honest advice from matured and married people here, I have been married for two years, I didn't date my wife. I met her in the village and we got talking, we were both in our late thirties and got married after three months, my wife is not ugly and I won't say she is beautiful, she is just a normal woman. She does her wifey duties and she has good character. The issue is, I am not sexually attracted to her, we don't flow emotionally, we don't flow on gisting level, our level of exposure differ.
We only have sex to get her pregnant, we don't have kids yet, am not happy. How can I handle this?

You see ur life u r not attracted to her and u married her or u are here to seek attention

three months is enough for you to know if you are sexually attracted to her,know if you two can gist at same level,know if you two share same or any kind of interest...maybe you are looking for a reason to quit...my advise to you is to spend more time with her.. learn to share her interest with her...you must not like what she likes but you will share those moments she loves with her....eg if she likes local movies...watch it with her...learn about the movies and gist it with her....lead by example oga...if she sees you doing that...as long as she is a good woman that loves her family,she will start sharing your own interest with you as well...eg if you watch football,she might just start watching too....take things easy..since you didn't date her...DATE HER INSIDE THE MARRIAGE...start everything over again but this time inside the marriage...bro good woman no easy to see o...as you say she good,try your best to make things work...teach her, lead her... complain less...she will learn....if you build that attraction and companionship overtime sexually attraction will boost as well...good luck

Ajokol:
Please I need honest advice from matured and married people here, I have been married for two years, I didn't date my wife. I met her in the village and we got talking, we were both in our late thirties and got married after three months, my wife is not ugly and I won't say she is beautiful, she is just a normal woman. She does her wifey duties and she has good character. The issue is, I am not sexually attracted to her, we don't flow emotionally, we don't flow on gisting level, our level of exposure differ.
We only have sex to get her pregnant, we don't have kids yet, am not happy. How can I handle this?

weda he dey seek attention or not... person fit dey here when dey pass through similar matter sha

OP, sorry to say this but she is intellectually not in ur level hence the reason u two don't flow well
Pls try and upgrade her, u see one of the reasons why school is important and I believe with that her level of exposure will increase

Manage her like that. Nothing outside that you are looking for. Make her sexually attractive that’s why she’s your wife.

You have to make it work. Like you said, she's not a bad woman and not ugly so make her and the marriage whatever you want it to be.

For white people, your wife must be your soul mate. Find freinds and outsource some of your expectations. If shes the teacheable type you can upgrade her gradually.

Then date her, try to know her better.

Hmmm!!!!! this is serious but then just as @rickpat said, get those reasons behind you and build your wife to the standard you desire of her. Engage her into your life totally, spend money on her and make her see the need to upgrade her level intellectually and all would be fine. it is most times hard to get a 'full package for that kind of market'.

Nekky5:
Hmmm!!!!! this is serious but then just as @rickpat said, get those reasons behind you and build your wife to the standard you desire of her. Engage her into your life totally, spend money on her and make her see the need to upgrade her level intellectually and all would be fine. it is most times hard to get a 'full package for that kind of market'.

can you Bleep me in anal style

luscioustrish:
Then date her, try to know her better.

can we Bleep my dog

To be honest,I don't have anything to say to u.

Now that u are not happy, what do u want to do now?

To make u happy I guess?

U have to train your wife to your level, that is all.

Happiness is subjective and I can bet u,in Nigeria few people are happy.

.

You don't know what God has done for you.

If the woman gives you peace of mind, please love and accept her.

In an instance like this, your best bet is to build a mental connection - which is better, healthier and more lasting than an emotional connection - with her. Mental transmutation.

The first step towards realizing this is by consciously embracing a sense of fairness; the fact that she has not wittingly done anything spitefully to destroy whatever you hold dear, citing your submission, will make it easier for you.

You can get this done by magnifying one single attribute she possesses; gradually and subconsciously, a mutual mental connection will take place and you will begin to see her as the best thing that has ever happened to you.

rickpat:
weda he dey seek attention or not... person fit dey here when dey pass through similar matter sha

u took it out of my mouth. Believe me things are happening. This kind of thing is rampant

Bukola94:
u took it out of my mouth. Believe me things are happening. This kind of thing is rampant

very very rampant amongst couples

The marriage na interview?
Since you say you no date her...
She tick all the boxes in the interview abi?

You will be shock when someone else treats her nicely with enough love in addition to buying her nice fitted cloths, its by then your eyes will clear. All those celebrities you see looking good are made possible by good clothes, makeups and good living.

Ajokol:
Please I need honest advice from matured and married people here, I have been married for two years, I didn't date my wife. I met her in the village and we got talking, we were both in our late thirties and got married after three months, my wife is not ugly and I won't say she is beautiful, she is just a normal woman. She does her wifey duties and she has good character. The issue is, I am not sexually attracted to her, we don't flow emotionally, we don't flow on gisting level, our level of exposure differ.
We only have sex to get her pregnant, we don't have kids yet, am not happy. How can I handle this?

You have to accept what you have because you made the choice and went ahead with it, even when you know vividly that there is no affection between both of you, in fact there was no connection or link while even the marriage was been planned

You have lived in the city where you had girl friends that spiced your life and you had good times with them

But when it was time to settle down you went to the village because those city girls are not just good enough

You can adjust your taste and choices for you to deal with this unpleasant situations

Teach her how you want her to be, engage her in to discussions that are more about social life

Relax and be patient for her to become pregnant that's if your sperm counts are perfect

Take her to yaba market you will get nice dresses and Jeans trousers that will make her look realy casual and nice looking too

Give her money to go to salon and make good hair once a month

Speak more of English than your local dialect

What I mean by above comments is that,
You should brush her up so that she can be upgraded

Get her a job so far she will be living the house in the morning to come back in the evening

She will see her mates and she will also learn few things

Just guide her

If you don't follow this simple ideas

You will end up n the hands of those city girls you dropped just because you want to marry from the village and once they realize that you are not enjoying your marriage, she will take over and give you the vibes that will spice your life up

I guess because she's not the spoilt type that will dress like a harlot to seduce you around the house and probably lick your anus that's why she's not attractive.

You should have married the slutty ones in the city that will give you what you want and still be servicing other men outside.

I've said it, you men don't deserve a good and reserved woman. You see the type that was offering her body as payment to an MC she's hiring for her wedding? That's the kind of lady that fits the men of this generation.

Maybe if they even check you now, you're not good looking or sexy, worst still, you may even be short.

Excuse me abeg!

olabrinks:
Manage her like that. Nothing outside that you are looking for. Make her sexually attractive that’s why she’s your wife.

Dem dey manage wife

Channah1:
I guess because she's not the spoilt type that will dress like a harlot to seduce you around the house and probably lick your anus that's why she's not attractive.

You should have married the slutty ones in the city that will give you what you want and still be servicing other men outside.

I've said it, you men don't deserve a good and reserved woman. You see the type that was offering her body as payment to an MC she's hiring for her wedding? That's the kind of lady that fits the men of this generation.

Maybe if they even check you now, you're not good looking, worst still, you may even be short.

Nonsense!

Yen yen yen yen

Na so person go come marry you now, you'll be cooking disgusting looking tomato melon soup and you expect such man to be sexually attracted to you... Nonsense!

Kriss216:

Yen yen yen yen

Na so person go come marry you now, you'll be cooking disgusting looking tomato melon soup and you expect such man to be sexually attracted to you... Nonsense!

You must be very stupid. You hear?
Just because I gave you audience the other day should not give the right to start mentioning me anyhow here. Ok? .

That guy was right about you afterall.

Don't ever mention me again. You nitwit.

Ajokol:
Please I need honest advice from matured and married people here, I have been married for two years, I didn't date my wife. I met her in the village and we got talking, we were both in our late thirties and got married after three months, my wife is not ugly and I won't say she is beautiful, she is just a normal woman. She does her wifey duties and she has good character. The issue is, I am not sexually attracted to her, we don't flow emotionally, we don't flow on gisting level, our level of exposure differ.
We only have sex to get her pregnant, we don't have kids yet, am not happy. How can I handle this?

U are not attracted to ur wife or u aren't happy abt ur childless marriage?

Buy seductive dresses for her. Do a make over, take her to a spa. Then take her out to movies, eateries etc. A good woman she is, you say. Take care of her. Turn her to a woman that can please you on bed.

See all these hypocritical ladies here advising op to tolerate and start *teaching " an old woman like op's wife, flip the coin now and they'll not advocate similar patience, tolerance and guidance. Many of them will even encourage the wife to divorce the man. Hypocrites!

A woman in her late thirties fa. I blame op for marrying such an mgbeke. Even if you want to marry such class of girl, why not marry the one that is still young and fresh with some sexual appeals to make up for the other stuff she lacks. So that when you're teaching her, we'll know you're teaching a child.