Disclaimer: This is neither a story nor an attempt at one. This was posted originally on romance section and moved here by the moderators for reasons I still don't understand. It is simply a detailed description of a supposed active crime. I was just catching cruise. It's not to be taken seriously.

*********
I am standing hands akimbo in the middle of my siting room with my 2-month-old child strapped half-asleep across my back. The fan above me is blowing at full tilt, sending a flurry of cool air across the room. I'm enjoying the feeling of the wind in my hair. It's pacifying.

The powdery substance Baba gave me is nestled gently in my palm. It was handed to me carefully packaged in a small, transparent plastic bag, reminiscent of what street boys use in storing their Indian hemp. I imagine Chioma is currently caught in the gridlock of the Lagos traffic, right on her way here. She is a woman of her word. I have no reason to worry. She will arrive soon enough.

I shift my gaze to the picture on the television screen and I'm momentarily stirred out of the realm of my thoughts. I reach for the remote control resting on the center table and amplify the volume of the television to full blast. The tune is catchy and the scenery is entralling; Omah Lay is posed at the back of a light teal vintage vehicle, swarmed by beautiful black women draped in colourful African fabric. The melody is groovy; commanding my hips to move without caution.

The lyrics of the song seem to hum Chioma's coming, proclaiming her arrival in its rhythm
Everything I do is for my WOMAN, for my little child; especially what I'm about to do now.

I have pictured what my daughter's life would be like if I don't take this important step. She'd probably end up bent over a set of trays on the side of a busy Nigerian road, selling comestibles in the blazing sun. Or worse, offering her precious body to beasts with throbbing joysticks, in exchange for her survival.

I would never let her fall prey to these lascivious dogs who take pleasure in dragging the screeching bodies of innocent little girls from their childhood, with their slippery, sweet-talking lips and fat wallets - girls that ask for a shoulder to lean on but get a fist instead - claws peeling their bodies open like ripe fruit for the taking.

I watched my dreams crumble to dust before me. But I'll see my daughter's blossom radiantly like a daffodil in the spring.

Kumtuneu

Yes!! Chioma has arrived!! I'll post as soon as I've done what Baba asked me to do. Please bear with me.

Chioma arrived earlier than I expected. She was in high spirits, like she always is. Why wouldn't she be? She had the perfect life; a high paying job, her personal car, her own apartment and a legion of men worshiping at her altar. She arrived with a large plastic bag in her hand and a beaming smile on her face. The bag had a logo which indicated she had stopped by at a supermarket before visiting. The bag was stocked to the full with food and drinks. We exchanged warm hugs and I expressed genuine gratitude for her kindness and generosity of spirit.

After some chitchat I served her food laced with the substance Baba had given me. I watched her get down, fingers deep in the large plate of Eba and Egusi soup, unaware that this meal was going to be her last. But at least it was a delicious one. I made certain of that.

I had cranked up the volume of the TV just in case she made loud dying noises that might attract the neighbors. I was morbidly curious as to how exactly she would die. Would she slump silently to the floor or would she cough and splutter blood all over my sitting room, while squealing in pain as her insides exploded? I couldn't wait to see.

My daughter was fast asleep; nestled quietly in her warm cradle, swaddled in a blanket, oblivious to the lengths I had gone to give her the best life had to offer. I prayed silently that the noise wouldn't awaken her. She was too young to witness the horid scene that was about to unfold.

YANKURI.

Chioma is almost done with her food, but she hasn't shown any sign of dying. She seems alright. She's even talking about spending the night here. Did Baba scam me? I paid the old fool fifty thousand naira for this. Why isn't the sacrifice dying?

I'll keep you guys posted. Chioma is showing me stuff on her Instagram page. What a show-off.

Finally!! It worked. I'll post soon, just need time to organize my thoughts.

Wetin dey occur here

Chioma gave out a harsh half-stifled yell as her phone fell off her hands and onto the floor. She grabbed firmly at her neck, her eyes wide with fright. She tottered around, still clutching her neck with both hands. It was as though she had a large mango seed stuck in her throat and was trying fruitlessly to get it out.

She lurched forward in the direction of the door, froze still, and then flumped backwards onto the floor; her head colliding with a side stool on its way. The thudding sound of the collision reverberated through the room.

I couldn't hide my excitement. I let out a loud involuntary "Yes!!" which probably explained the horrified look of surprise on her face as she lay on the floor paralyzed and helpless, gasping for air, every cell in her body fighting to keep her alive.

She inched her head forward in my direction, as if to speak, but no words came out. Just a burp. I drew closer and crouched in front of her. I wanted to get a better view. I wished I could pull the words out from her throat.
"Say the damn words you idiot," I bawled. She responded with a blank stare and vacant eyes. She was dead.

Too much wahala

You guys might think it's a joke...this might actually be an active crime. Moderators should report this person's email to the police or DSS

DSS WAHALA NO BE JOKE OO . OP MIND YOUR WRITE UP OO . Nairaland is not as anonymous as you think ooo
Maythelordhelpus

The two guys above me thought they acted intelligently but they are very far from intelligence.

For the 1st one
He's saying we might think the story is a joke and mods should report to DSS. Why not email the mod and relay your suggestion to him.

For the 2nd one
He's actually sounding like he wants the lady to go scot free if indeed this is a "truecrime". Stating how nairaland is not so anonymous and should be careful.

What if DSS or a detective is silently following this thread to obtain clues or get substance from subsequent posts because it seems she's yet to complete her story.

Your info will only let this user deactivate account soon and escape the arm of the law. Must you type or comment?

NewSoul:
The two guys above me thought they acted intelligently but they are very far from intelligence.

For the 1st one
He's saying we might think the story is a joke and mods should report to DSS. Why not email the mod and relay your suggestion to him.

For the 2nd one
He's actually sounding like he wants the lady to go scot free if indeed this is a "truecrime". Stating how nairaland is not so anonymous and should be careful.

What if DSS or a detective is silently following this thread to obtain clues or get substance from subsequent posts because it seems she's yet to complete her story.

Your info will only let this user deactivate account soon and escape the arm of the law. Must you type or comment?

Its the same moniker testing her writtimg skills

Lastime, her husband raped her...this night shes killimg her friend...i'm sure shes happy being able to grab your attention into her make-belief stories

It's fiction guys

Nobody would remember nairaland while doing such

Is this not thesame moniker that was raped by her husband?

So na ds one enter your brain to write

Omo, even though I believe this story is fictional, it's too bland OP. To even imagine that you accused a writer who's miles ahead of you about dropping bland lines/updates. I decided to check out your story thinking that you have something better to offer, I'll rather read thousands of Larrysun's bland stories.
You can improve sha, there's always room for improvement. But then destructive criticism of others even though you can't do any better is annoying.

Dybala11:
Omo, even though I believe this story is fictional, it's too bland OP. To even imagine that you accused a writer who's miles ahead of you about dropping bland lines/updates. I decided to check out your story thinking that you have something better to offer, I'll rather read thousands of Larrysun's bland stories.
You can improve sha, there's always room for improvement. But then destructive criticism of others even though you can't do any better is annoying.

This isn't a story. This is simply an attempt at trolling. Yet it's better written than the hot pile of garbage that you and your ilk celebrate on your beloved literature section.

It was originally posted on romance section to gauge people's reaction to the subject matter. I tried to make it seem like I was actively in the process of killing someone. The moderators moved it here.

Some paragraphs in my rushed posts, are more beautiful than anything your god Larrysun has ever written in his entire life. Imagine comparing me with a writer whose prose is on the level of primary school students.

Please come up with a different adjective other than bland.

Hermix:


This isn't a story. This is simply an attempt at trolling. Yet it's better written than the hot pile of garbage that you and your ilk celebrate on your beloved literature section.

It was originally posted on romance section to gauge people's reaction to the subject matter. I tried to make it seem like I was actively in the process of killing someone. The moderators moved it here.

Some paragraphs in my rushed posts, are more beautiful than anything your god Larrysun has ever written in his entire life. Imagine comparing me with a writer whose prose is on the level of primary school students.

Please come up with a different adjective other than bland.

This so called attempt is still thrash. I didn't read past the second line before I stopped. The so called garbage is still better than the best story you've ever written. I bet this is the second time you'll try to write something sef. You don't come out to criticize people who are better than you are destructively, it's a sign of your weakness as an individual, an inexcusable character flaw. If you don't see what I'm trying to point out to you, then I wish you the best in your endeavors. Just drop a better story than what Larrysun has written and I will personally sing your praises to the high heavens. There are and have been lots of great writers on this forum, I've been reading stories here as far back as 2011. The other writer you quoted as being the best here is even far from the best in my opinion. I can recommend writers I considered to be better than her if you like. Search for stories written by the likes of Royver and let me see you repeat that your childish comment again.
Only kids throw tantrums when they see others playing with better toys than theirs, learn to criticize others constructively. I repeat mate, if you can't comprehend this then it's a serious character flaw you have to correct about yourself. Peace!

And for the record, I've never and I don't idolize Larrysun. His works are not the best I've read on this forum, nevertheless I appreciate him making his literary works available for folks here. I've read stories written by him and other writers for free on this forum, drop yours too if you believe you can do better than them all. It's a challenge I hope you'll take up.

Hermix:
Chioma gave out a harsh half-stifled yell as her phone fell off her hands and onto the floor. She grabbed firmly at her neck, her eyes wide with fright. She tottered around, still clutching her neck with both hands. It was as though she had a large mango seed stuck in her throat and was trying fruitlessly to get it out.

She lurched forward in the direction of the door, froze still, and then flumped backwards onto the floor; her head colliding with a side stool on its way. The thudding sound of the collision reverberated through the room.

I couldn't hide my excitement. I let out a loud "Yes!!" which probably explained the horrified look of surprise on her face as she lay on the floor paralyzed and helpless, gasping for air, every cell in her body fighting to keep her alive.

She inched her head forward in my direction, as if to speak, but no words came out. Just a burp. I drew closer and crouched in front of her. I wanted to get a better view. I wished I could pull the words out from her throat.
"Say the damn words you idiot," I bawled. She responded with a blank stare and vacant eyes. She was dead.

Trolling gone wrong, zero imaginations. Pls I'm still waiting for your literary work, Mr better writer.

Dybala11:

This so called attempt is still thrash. I didn't read past the second line before I stopped. The so called garbage is still better than the best story you've ever written. I bet this is the second time you'll try to write something sef. You don't come out to criticize people who are better than you are destructively, it's a sign of your weakness as an individual, an inexcusable character flaw. If you don't see what I'm trying to point out to you, then I wish you the best in your endeavors. Just drop a better story than what Larrysun has written and I will personally sing your praises to the high heavens. There are and have been lots of great writers on this forum, I've been reading stories here as far back as 2011. The other writer you quoted as being the best here is even far from the best in my opinion. I can recommend writers I considered to be better than her if you like. Search for stories written by the likes of Royver and let me see you repeat that your childish comment again.
Only kids throw tantrums when they see others playing with better toys than theirs, learn to criticize others constructively. I repeat mate, if you can't comprehend this then it's a serious character flaw you have to correct about yourself. Peace!

And for the record, I've never and I don't idolize Larrysun. His works are not the best I've read on this forum, nevertheless I appreciate him making his literary works available for folks here. I've read stories written by him and other writers for free on this forum, drop yours too if you believe you can do better than them all. It's a challenge I hope you'll take up.

You supposedly didn't read past the first line of my post, yet you are making strong remarks about my writing? Your attempt at derision is pathetic.

Below are paragraphs from beloved Royver and paragraphs from misswrite. If you think Royver is a better writer, then you are not worth exchanging words with as you couldn't identify good writing if it was staring you in the face.

Thank you for providing another quack for me to unmask.

Royver:

"I stood alone in the quiet forest, darkness and shadows surrounding me, the moon above offering little illumination. I knew immediately that this was no ordinary dream, I was getting used to differentiating visions from the fantasies of my slumbering mind. I had no fear that I would be attacked by night creatures as I knew I couldn’t be seen. I was only mildly concerned that this dream might leave me exhausted by morning as they sometimes tended to do.

I watched as a light approached in the darkness; two men carrying an oil lamp to show their way as they passed by me to their unknown destination, oblivious of my presence. As was the way with these things I followed, a ubiquitous entity in the events unfolding before me. The two young men walked steadily towards the old man's hut. They were dressed only in raffia leaves and short wrappers made from Adire fabrics and their heads had been clean shaven. One of them carried the necklace of their intended victim and the other carried the oil lamp in one hand and a cutlass to clear through foliage in the other"

Misswrite:

"It seemed like only moments ago that my tired legs carried me across the stretch of wilderness as fast as they could. The sound of my own breathing was heavy in my ears; and terror, the shape of cold sweat, wet my skin, fuelling my escape. My bare feet bled from the repeated collision with resolute boulders. I did not see the blood in the pitch blackness of the night but my toes felt sticky, and the lubricant between them was much thicker than water. The pain would come to me after, I knew, but in that moment, I was running to stay alive. I could concern myself with nothing else.

The wild chanting had become only a murmur in the distance – quiet and small – and the raging torches were diminished to flickers that seemed now inconsequential like fireflies. The people determined to kill me had fallen some ways behind; but their malice loomed ever large and deathly close, and it breathed down my neck like a rabid dog. Therefore, I could not relent. I had to keep going. If I got caught, I would burn like Monday did – poisoning the air with the stench of my unripe scorching flesh – waking the hills with strident agony. The deafening screaming from earlier that night haunted me still. They had put a tire around his neck and doused him in petrol because Monday was an abomination, they said, just like I was; just like I would continue to be if luck would let me outrun the mob’s eager judgment. If not, I was doomed for sure. My desperate hope was to find The Others. Finding them was my only realistic chance to survive."

Hermix:


You supposedly didn't read past the first line of my post, yet you are making strong remarks about my writing? Your attempt at derision is pathetic.

Below are paragraphs from your Royver and paaragraphs from misswrite. If you think Royver is a better writer, then you are not worth exchanging words with couldn't identify good writing if it was staring you in the face.

Thank you for providing another quack for me to unmask.

Really?
Now I know that I'm exchanging words with a toddler or a boy with the mentality of a toddler.
By the way, I'm still waiting for you to drop a story better than Larrysun if you have one since you claimed that you're a better writer. I'm not in for trolls right now, I'm in for business and damned serious mate. Give us a better literary work to read Mr better writer and I'll sing your praises all over this forum. If you fail to do this, then it's either you're less of a man and suffering from a bad case of low self esteem or you're not even a writer to start with.

Seriously u are funny. First ur husband raped u now u killed ur bestfriend? U need help with ur work try to write something better than all this and stop saying hateful words to people who corrects u. Critics are meant to make u a better writer. No offence how old are u? Cuz ur mindset is childish

Tina11:
Seriously u are funny. First ur husband raped u now u killed ur bestfriend? U need help with ur work try to write something better than all this and stop saying hateful words to people who corrects u. Critics are meant to make u a better writer. No offence how old are u? Cuz ur mindset is childish

You know nothing about good writing so you are not worthy of criticizing my writing. I checked your posts, most of the stories you give thumbs up to are rubbish.

Expose yourself to good literature and then come back to talk to me.

You and your ilk are so dense that you can't even figure out that this wasn't an attempt at storytelling. This was just mere trolling for fun to get a reaction, written in just under an hour, yet the writing is better than the nonsense you enjoy reading.

How old are you? Because you sound like your brain stopped developing at the age of two.

Hermix:


You know nothing about good writing so you are not worthy of criticizing my writing. I checked your posts, most of the stories you give thumbs up to are rubbish.

Expose yourself to good literature and then come back to talk to me.

You and your ilk are so dense that you can't even figure out that this wasn't an attempt at storytelling. This was just mere trolling for fun to get a reaction, written in just under an hour, yet the writing is better than the nonsense you enjoy reading.

How old are you? Because you sound like your brain stopped developing at the age of two.

You're a good writer, but in no way better than the others whom you've basically decimated with unjust criticism. And it doesn't help that you throw insults at whomever points this out. But I'm sure at this point, even you know you aren't extremely good.

BTW... If you thought it a good strategy to unfairly criticize other writers, bash readers who critic your own work, while proclaiming your supremacy at writing, it is not.

NL can do a lot of good for your aspirations, you might want to be nice.

Hermix:


You know nothing about good writing so you are not worthy of criticizing my writing. I checked your posts, most of the stories you give thumbs up to are rubbish.

Expose yourself to good literature and then come back to talk to me.

You and your ilk are so dense that you can't even figure out that this wasn't an attempt at storytelling. This was just mere trolling for fun to get a reaction, written in just under an hour, yet the writing is better than the nonsense you enjoy reading.

How old are you? Because you sound like your brain stopped developing at the age of two.

really if what u write is what u picture good then i'd rather read what u picture bad. Ur just a bitter fellow with stupid imaginations. Continue like this u will die bitter. Ur simply void of good reasoning, u think by downgrading others u will be termed a better writer, well u better think again right now ur simply fruitless and a branch that doesn't bear fruit shall...

KaLuCh:


You're a good writer, but in no way better than the others whom you've basically decimated with unjust criticism. And it doesn't help that you throw insults at whomever points this out. But I'm sure at this point, even you know you aren't extremely good.

BTW... If you thought it a good strategy to unfairly criticize other writers, bash readers who critic your own work, while proclaiming your supremacy at writing, it is not.

NL can do a lot of good for your aspirations, you might want to be nice.

I'm not a good writer. That's the point. My writing is still undeveloped and my prose is basic, yet it stands taller than most of the writing on literature section that receive praises. This is what annoyed me when I found Nairaland.

I've never said I was good, that's why I created my most recent thread to educate myself and learn from the works of the greatest writers.

Hermix:


I'm not a good writer. That's the point. My writing is still undeveloped and my prose is basic, yet it stands taller than most of the writing on literature section that receive praises. This is what annoyed me when I found Nairaland.

I've never said I was good, that's why I created my most recent thread to educate myself and learn from the works of the greatest writers.

I don't think anyone considers NL writers to be in the level of JK Rowlings yet. But that doesn't in any way mean we can't enjoy them and praise them for valiant efforts. While your points are very valid, your method of presenting them is caustic. And that's where we frown. Criticism must not be derogatory, and nobody likes a person toots their own horns.

You do not have to tell us you are better than most writers here for us to know that. A famous saying in your field is 'show, don't tell.'