In sequence to a post I made earlier on how couples can run a home with a 100k income in this present economy, which gave rise to another and yet another post where a breakdown was finally given, something caught my attention which brought me close to tears and this are my exact concerns and worries about the OP I made earlier.

Now, the man that gave the breakdown said some things in his reply to a commenter and in the tone of that reply, you could sense hes already feeling the heat from what he said in the attached excerpts.

This goes to show that while everyone was busy commending and cheering him for running a home with that amount, he on the other hand is not finding easy and is already planning to subject his unborn baby to a life of discomfort and that is just one aspect of the so many uncomfortable adjustments he might be forced to make if he still on that income but I reject that for him.

Now ma ladies, after seeing this harsh reality, would you still wanna go ahead?
The choice is yours to make and endure or enjoy the outcome.

Below is an excerpt from that post that made me create this post.

Check the income of who you wan settle for, very important. Check if you can adjust and cope.

Rozross:
Check the income of who you wan settle for, very important. 500k monthly sef is manage these days. Let’s be realistic.

I have and that was what gave rise to all these posts.

I can't imagine being subjected to that kind of life. Imagine using napkins for a baby in this era.

Don't let nairaland men cheer you into the gutters. They celebrate poverty more than anything. And stop comparing 500k to 100k abeg. Leave that mentality.

Someone who earns 500k will not use napkins for his child. Be realistic. You can't cope with a 100k with a family. You'll end up borrowing. I'm talking about this present economy o. Don't know what tomorrow will look like. But for the now, don't be deceived.

Napkins will never kill a child....


Children gets uncomfortable at first used of anything but eventually get used to it with time...


If the OP said he will manage napkin and the quoter decided to bring prayers I to it .. then the quoter is just a fool...


The quoter should volunteer to sponsor the op with money for pampers let's see .....

I wonder how people think...

It's my child and that's period. If I can't afford pampers, why should I overstretched my finances when the child can manage the napkin.

You people think that having a home is something that singles like you can comprehend and give opinions to what you have no idea of ...

Rozross:
Check the income of who you wan settle for, very important. Check if you can adjust and cope.

Then the marriage ceremony will definitely be nothing less than 10m

While some countries are trying to narrow the gap between rich and poor

Others are working overtime to widen the gap much more.

This is the reason for all these problems. Inflation going up salary static? That is why the husbandman resorted to using napkins.

JASONjnr:
Napkins will never kill a child....


Children gets uncomfortable at first used of anything but eventually get used to it with time...


If the OP said he will manage napkin and the quoter decided to bring prayers I to it .. then the quoter is just a fool...


The quoter should volunteer to sponsor the op with money for pampers let's see .....

I wonder how people think...

It's my child and that's period. If I can't afford pampers, why should I overstretched my finances when the child can manage the napkin.

You people think that having a home is something that singles like you can comprehend and give opinions to what you have no idea of ...

Oga!! No body is Fighting you here. I was the quoter that prayed for him because that is the only thing anyone can offer his neighbors in this trying times.

I don't know why you men always get edgy whenever the truth about the cost of running a home is being mentioned by a female meanwhile that's the hidden and unspoken cause of many marital problems.

We don't like to discuss these things and see how we can work it out to favor both parties. It always has to be how the man sees and wants it, at the end of the day, you chase your woman into the open arms of other men. So many stories of women abandoning their husbands due to lack and basic important needs not met at home and the men coming to nairaland to wail.

In ( kiz Daniels voice) Wake up!

Instead of napkin and tie pant, y not use cloth diapers, it looks more cool, good for the environment, saves you lots of money too..I know some of my pals that uses it and it looks nice on there babies

Although I used disposable diapers(Pampers) for my kids cos I don't have the time to wash and rewash

If u have read any comment I ever made concerning marriage,I used to emphasise on money.

Money is essential in marriage,in fact,I have often hammered on men marrying a working class woman or a woman with hand work. (not referring to the guy)
anything short of that,is a path way to hopelessness.

In all,it is not easy.

JASONjnr:
Napkins will never kill a child....


Children gets uncomfortable at first used of anything but eventually get used to it with time...


If the OP said he will manage napkin and the quoter decided to bring prayers I to it .. then the quoter is just a God sent...

Now, when you know as an intending couple that you're not gonna be able to afford a diaper ( I'm not referring to the man in question here) for the kids if they come now, why go ahead and disturb a lady or man to marry you?

Many people go into marriage without first calculating the cost at least for the first few years. No proper planning. They only plan wedding and leave the marriage out.

It's after the whole thing their eyes will clear and then they either begin to struggle and make lifestyle adjustments that some women end up revolting against.

Like taking a lady from ikoyi and then later tell her you're moving the whole family down to Ikorodu to cut cost of living... Oyo.!

Even a woman that was brought in from the village to live on the mainland, when the husband suggested moving them to Ikorodu because he couldn't cope with rent on the mainland, the woman vehemently refused. As in... She was shouting it in public "" I no go Ikorodu o, I no go Ikorodu o.." if na play, stop am" .
hahahahahaaa.... I can't laugh Biko.

If you like no laugh, na your toro be that.

I'm out!

Reusable diapers AKA napkins are actually more environmentally friendly. Nowadays they come in better designs that look really good. You save money on them and help the environment by avoiding all the excess waste that goes into landfills.

I was too lazy to do that but at least I opted for biodegradable diapers when I could.

Don’t talk down it. Look at these pretty designs that you can use and re-use until your baby outgrows them. Meanwhile a big pack of single use diapers cost twice as much and you throw them out after .

maureensylvia:
Instead of napkin and tie pant, y not use cloth diapers, it looks more lush, good for the environment, saves you lots of money too..I know some of my pals that uses it and it looks nice on there babies

Although I used disposable diapers(Pampers) for my kids cos I don't have the time to wash and rewash

Nice recommendation.
Are they highly absorbent like diapers? Do they keep baby bum dry for long?

How do these work, please?

Me I hate to wash ordinary clothes how much more napkins.

Nothing one will not see on this platform. I never knew using napkins will make life unbearable for a baby is God not wonderful. So an intending couple should not get married because of price of diaper at the market.
Life is all about adjustment and we that they used napkins on us we didn't die nor carry deadly disease.

It is better to use napkins to save cost rather than to put yourself in pressure.

madridguy:
Nothing one will not see on this platform. I never knew using napkins will make life unbearable for a baby is God not wonderful. So an intending couple should not get married because of price of diaper at the market.
Life is all about adjustment and we that they used napkins on us we didn't die nor carry deadly disease.

It is better to use napkins to save cost rather than to put yourself in pressure.

somebody here said 500k is not enuf to run a family (man, wife and baby)

cococandy:
Reusable diapers AKA napkins are actually more environmentally friendly. Nowadays they come in better designs that look really good. You save money on them and help the environment by avoiding all the excess waste that goes into landfills.

I was too lazy to do that but at least I opted for biodegradable diapers when I could.

Don’t talk down it. Look at these pretty designs that you can use and re-use until your baby outgrows them. Meanwhile a big pack of single use diapers cost twice as much and you throw them out after .

Ok, better. I hope the guy sees this.

How does this work? Does it absorb and hold like regular diapers? Please I want to know.

Thanks.

madridguy:
Nothing one will not see on this platform. I never knew using napkins will make life unbearable for a baby is God not wonderful. So an intending couple should not get married because of price of diaper at the market.
Life is all about adjustment and we that they used napkins on us we didn't die nor carry deadly disease.

It is better to use napkins to save cost rather than to put yourself in pressure.

Funny enough is that in all her rant, she has not proffered how she is going to add value to the 100k income of the man as the woman. Liabilities forming woke! Because if a man earns 100k and you earn as much or close to it, I find it hard to decipher how their is going to be an issue running a home in this era no matter the inflation!

VeeVeeMyLuv:
somebody here said 500k is not a enuf to run a family (man, wife and baby)

You dey mind the nairaland billionaires? Everybody in Nigeria must be finished because stats says 99% has less than 500k in their accounts. So how are Nigerians running their home?

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.vanguardngr.com/2021/10/just-in-99-4-of-bank-accounts-contain-less-than-n500000-ndic/amp/

madridguy:
Nothing one will not see on this platform. I never knew using napkins will make life unbearable for a baby is God not wonderful. So an intending couple should not get married because of price of diaper at the market.
Life is all about adjustment and we that they used napkins on us we didn't die nor carry deadly disease.

It is better to use napkins to save cost rather than to put yourself in pressure.

I'm not saying intending couples shouldn't get married because of diapers. I only meant... that is just one aspect of so many expenses that one is going to be faced with once the kids start coming. Please don't twist my words.

What I don't get is why anyone would choose to expose themselves to anything that will subject them to pressure like you've rightly pointed out...

How about avoiding such scenario by waiting until you're financially capable or plan on having just one child?

Blessedmercy8:


Oga!! No body is Fighting you here. I was the quoter that prayed for him because that is the only thing anyone can offer his neighbors in this trying times.

I don't know why you men always get edgy whenever the truth about the cost of running a home is being mentioned by a female meanwhile that's the hidden and unspoken cause of many marital problems.

We don't like to discuss these things and see how we can work it out to favor both parties. It always has to be how the man sees and wants it, at the end of the day, you chase your woman into the open arms of other men. So many stories of women abandoning their husbands due to lack and basic important needs not met at home and the men coming to nairaland to wail.

In ( kiz Daniels voice) Wake up!

At your age u don't have a child, no husband, you are fast approaching menopause & ur fertility rate is fast dwindling. U think worrying about a married man with an understanding wife should be your problem now? Wait till u get to 50 years body go tell u.

I was once like u & hated poor people going into marriage till a very close friend changed my mentality. He got married with virtually nothing, but today he is hitting contract worth millions. A lot of us were raised with napkins, even when ur parents got married there is high chances they were still managing, but they raised u. U think u are doing anyone by posting nonsense about marriage?

U are no longer far from reality, u are already in ur 40s, just 10 years from now, u will understand what it means be a single lady without a child, husband or family. Those u are mocking now will look far more better than u. Keep on deceiving yourself...

Op you are right. If he can cut costs for ordinary diapers. I wonder what he will feed the baby with given the high cost of baby food in the market now.

My daughter is 3 and I still give her aptamil milk for toddlers which costs 11000. She drinks 3 cans a month.

Please we should all endeavor to be able to give our kids a better life than we lived. Good food, good clothes, good education shouldn’t be a luxury.

redseason:

Funny enough is that in all her rant, she has not proffered how she is going to add value to the 100k income of the man as the woman. Liabilities forming woke! Because if a man earns 100k and you earn as much or close to it, I find it hard to decipher how their is going to be an issue running a home in this era no matter the inflation!

How am I supposed to add value with my income that cannot sustain me alone as a single? Or you now forget how the same you men always kick against the woman depending on the Man for her needs? Now you want a woman to add value to his 100k. No be only value, na value bread * * chuckles**.

A man that woke up and says he's ready to settle down should be very very ready and not depend on any woman. I'm speaking from the men's perspective now. That's how you men tell us not to depend on our husbands money. So i won't lose myself just because I want to add value to a man in carrying out his responsibilities.

I gat "me" to take care of as well and the money never rish me.

Bunnybee:
Op you are right. If he can cut costs for ordinary diapers. I wonder what he will feed the baby with given the high cost of baby food in the market now.

My daughter is 3 and I still give her aptamil milk for toddlers which costs 11000. She drinks 3 cans a month.

Please we should all endeavor to be able to give our kids a better life than we lived. Good food, good clothes, good education shouldn’t be a luxury .

My dear Madam in Nigeria these basic things are a luxury now.

Blessedmercy8:


Oga!! No body is Fighting you here. I was the quoter that prayed for him because that is the only thing anyone can offer his neighbors in this trying times.

I don't know why you men always get edgy whenever the truth about the cost of running a home is being mentioned by a female meanwhile that's the hidden and unspoken cause of many marital problems.

We don't like to discuss these things and see how we can work it out to favor both parties. It always has to be how the man sees and wants it, at the end of the day, you chase your woman into the open arms of other men. So many stories of women abandoning their husbands due to lack and basic important needs not met at home and the men coming to nairaland to wail.

In ( kiz Daniels voice) Wake up!

Wait ....


The cost of running a home isn't entirely a man's responsibility....

And if you're a woman and you feel that because a man asked your hand in marriage, then he should be the one to foot the bills because he wanted marriage and kids.....


See, God will never allow some men to get entangled with female who doesn't understand home economy.

Home management is a very serious quality that men should look out for.

I wonder why you think that your work is to pray instead of to work to also support a man....
And if you think that you can't manage home or a man's little earnings... then stay away from such men... and allow women that will scale the fence to do so.

Blessedmercy8:


Ok, better. I hope the guy sees this.

How does this work? Does it absorb and hold like regular diapers? Please I want to know.

Thanks.

I’m thinking washable sanitary pad but for babies. Pretty sure urine will come off easily. Baby poo shouldn’t be that hard to wash off either. Sanitizing after each wash should help too. I didn’t use them but I think they are cute. And if they end up saving the couple some money, Why not?

Rubbiish:

At your age u don't have a child, no husband, you are fast approaching menopause & ur fertility rate is fast dwindling. U think worrying about a married man with an understanding wife should be your problem now? Wait till u get to 50 years body go tell u.

I was once like u & hated poor people going into marriage till a very close friend changed my mentality. He got married with virtually nothing, but today he is hitting contract worth millions. A lot of us were raised with napkins, even when ur parents got married there is high chances they were still managing, but they raised u. U think u are doing anyone by posting nonsense about marriage?

U are no longer far from reality, u are already in ur 40s, just 10 years from now, u will understand what it means be a single lady without a child, husband or family. Those u are mocking now will look far more better than u. Keep on deceiving yourself...

As the lord of hosts liveth, let every evil word you have uttered here befall YOU, in Jesus name.

Amen.

I will never mock anyone. This whole post was about me in the first place so who's mocking who?

In your next life, you'll tread cautiously.

VeeVeeMyLuv:

My dear Madam in Nigeria these basic things are a luxury now.

Lol. I think it’s unfair to have kids knowing you can’t provide for them.

Bunnybee:
Op you are right. If he can cut costs for ordinary diapers. I wonder what he will feed the baby with given the high cost of baby food in the market now.

My daughter is 3 and I still give her aptamil milk for toddlers which costs 11000. She drinks 3 cans a month.

Please we should all endeavor to be able to give our kids a better life than we lived. Good food, good clothes, good education shouldn’t be a luxury.

From your profile pic it’s obvious the kind work you Dey do. So money no be problem for you. FEAR SINGLE MOTHERS

cococandy:
Reusable diapers AKA napkins are actually more environmentally friendly. Nowadays they come in better designs that look really good. You save money on them and help the environment by avoiding all the excess waste that goes into landfills.

I was too lazy to do that but at least I opted for biodegradable diapers when I could.

Don’t talk down it. Look at these pretty designs that you can use and re-use until your baby outgrows them. Meanwhile a big pack of single use diapers cost twice as much and you throw them out after .

It takes so much time to dry.I bought two for trial but eventually threw it away after a single usage.
One night I ran out of diapers and had to use it.My baby was very uncomfortable in it(I dont know why) and it took almost 3 days to dry in dry weatherooo.
It'd take forever todry in rainy season.

Blessedmercy8:


How am I supposed to add value with my income that cannot sustain me alone as a single? Or you now forget how the same you men always kick against the woman depending on the Man for her needs? Now you want a woman to add value to his 100k. No be only value, na value bread * * chuckles**.

A man that woke up and says he's ready to settle down should be very very ready and not depend on any woman. I'm speaking from the men's perspective now. That's how you men tell us not to depend on our husbands money. So i won't lose myself just because I want to add value to a man in carrying out his responsibilities.

I gat "me" to take care of as well and the money never rish me.

Like someone said earlier, you are not doing anybody with your outbursts. Again, as a woman, you are not doing a man a favor by contributing to running the home. It’s your home also. A lot of middle income home in Nigeria are run by both spouse. Outside Nigeria, it’s a norm. As a matter of fact, there are more hardworking and productive women today the world over.

Let me shock you a bit. My wife earns 150k monthly, do you know I don’t know how much it costs to run my home; wife and two kids?(feeding, cable, electricity, health, sundry)! I live in diaspora, what are my duties? Education, unforeseen circumstances, capital intensive ventures like investments, mobility and buildings which bear both our names and handled by her.

Nairaland billionaire, if you earn as much as you claim, still single at over 40, no meaningful investment to your name, no achievement, still trying to see a men that earns so much to shore up your liabilities, and you are wondering how come you are still single? It’s not rocket science, you are the type a man that wants to live long should avoid. Marriage is not by force.

Bunnybee:
Op you are right. If he can cut costs for ordinary diapers. I wonder what he will feed the baby with given the high cost of baby food in the market now.

My daughter is 3 and I still give her aptamil milk for toddlers which costs 11000. She drinks 3 cans a month.

Please we should all endeavor to be able to give our kids a better life than we lived. Good food, good clothes, good education shouldn’t be a luxury.

**Bear hugs and kisses for you**
God bless you!

A better life than we had is all I'm about in my post but someone up there is already laying curses upon himself saying I'm mocking people.

How people can't see the angle im drifting is baffling but I'm happy you got my drift. God bless you.

Ok, like I said and you pointed out, diaper is one aspect, what of feeding? Ok, some will say do exclusive. What of other unplanned expenses in-between because with children, you can't predict.

Will you be happy seeing your children looking hungry and tatared.

A woman told me recently that it makes her worried sick each time she sees her children looking lean and she can't help because they are now on 101 meal. She said, anytime she gets something, she'll rush them with food like for a week but if in one day they revert back to the usual 101 ( which has become the norm these days in many homes) they'll drop immediately in that one day and look like they haven't eaten in weeks. It broke my heart. I don't even want to go into much details of what I see around every day.

It is well.

When someone admitted that she’s too lazy to even wash her own clothes then how much more baby clothes or diapers and napkins? Even the husbands clothes will not be looked at while he’s hustling bringing in the money to feed she and her kids too

Truly, no matter the money involved marriage isn’t for everyone

Bunnybee:
Op you are right. If he can cut costs for ordinary diapers. I wonder what he will feed the baby with given the high cost of baby food in the market now.

My daughter is 3 and I still give her aptamil milk for toddlers which costs 11000. She drinks 3 cans a month.

Please we should all endeavor to be able to give our kids a better life than we lived. Good food, good clothes, good education shouldn’t be a luxury.

That is because you have money for Aptamil.

There is NAN and Peak has a formula for newborns/toddlers. The child would adapt.

It is not like I endorse this kind of life, but everyone wouldn't be rich and most would want kids. We can’t say they should keep waiting until they can afford all the “luxury”. I just hope they are smart enough to stop at 1 child until more money comes.

Personally I do not wish to be his wife. I am not that virtuous and I don’t want to be. I wish two of them strength.