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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum (26123 Views)
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Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by UncleDaddy2017(m): 7:14am On Aug 29, 2022 |
My wife recently put to bed our first child. While at the hospital, it's been my wife's godmother who travelled down from another state specifically to be with my wife. Infact, she came straight to the hospital and she has been the one sleeping there with her at night. While I stay with her by day. When am at the hospital to relieve her, she goes to our house to sleep. My wife's mom and my mom (both live few streets away from ours) do come to the hospital during the day ... So fast forward to yesterday Sunday. My mother-in-law told my wife she will come after church... Hours after church closed we still didn't see her. Only for her to show up with a big traveling bag. And she knew quite well that my wife's godmother put up at our house. My house is a one bedroom apartment. When she came, I asked my wife that now that her mom is here, how will all of us sleep in this house as my wife, our baby and the godmother will sleep in the room, while I stay in the sitting room. She became angry and said they will all stay in the room. But that if I don't want her mom to stay in the house, she will just tell her to go away. So I told her that the proper thing to do is tell her mom to wait till Wednesday when the godmother lives, then she can come. Besides her house is only few streets away. She can be coming during the day and go back home. So this night now, the mom has bathed and has gone to stay in the room. The godmother who's now feeling sleepy, had to stay in the living room as she can't go to the room bc her mom is there. Me on the other hand, can't sleep in the living room bc her godmother is in the sitting room.... So I sat at the veranda until 11pm. The cloth I had on was the one I wore since morning. I can't go to the room to change as the mom is there. Neither the living room bc the other woman is there. My wife later came to me outside and was annoyed that I dont welcome her mother in my house. Do you think I'm wrong to have told my wife to tell her to wait till Wednesday before she comes? NB: my mother inlaw and I, live like mother and son until she came yesterday Sunday. 32 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Candidlady: 7:19am On Aug 29, 2022 |
![]() You want your wife's mum to pack her kaya back to her house so your wife's so called godmother could stay ![]() Or am imissing something ![]() Stewpid question please 1. This her godmother who/what is she to you ![]() 2. Who invited the godmother over (something tells me you were the one that invited her) For her to use such lines My wife later came to me outside and was annoyed "that I dont welcome her mother in my house." Lemme drift a Lil please what is the gender of your kid? If it is a boy child kindly look for the neatest waste bin all the best to you 20 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by wahles(m): 7:23am On Aug 29, 2022 |
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Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Nobody: 7:24am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Some people are not just reasonable, were you supposed to tell your mother-in-law on what to do in this type of situation? Let her leave till your wife’s godmother is gone since she’s just staying for few days. Dem no even pity you sef 121 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Justice505: 7:27am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Lol Well! I don't see anything wrong here, there is no issue here. If you feel uncomfortable changing in present of your mother in-law you can do that in the bathroom or if you don't like the bathroom you can use wrapper or towel to change. There was one neighbor we had when we were still tenant, there was a day the mother and father of the wife with her two siblings came to visit them not with standing that the couple had two children already. There were eight living in one room, there stay together for more than six months before there left for the village. Comfort is a luxury sometimes when you start having kids in marriage. you can't drive your wife Godmother away you just have to manage one two weeks of management won't cause a thing, you can decide to sleep on the couchie or look for any place in the sitting room and sleep. You're just having this sleepless nights because is your first time by the time your second child will come by then you would have been well prepared for any circumstance. 55 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by gfon(m): 7:29am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Na women life be that.... emotional blackmail just to get what they want 147 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Candidlady: 7:31am On Aug 29, 2022 |
gfon: Where were you when the creator was distributing sense ![]() Which one is emotional blackmail ![]() 14 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Tokskob2008: 7:36am On Aug 29, 2022 |
What is the place of the supposed godmother and why does she have to travel from another state to come and lodge in your place and start performing duties that aren't hers? I mean both your mum and that of your wife are still very much alive and can take care of your wife so I ask again what exactly is her place ![]() Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying the godmother coming over to help is bad but I'm just wondering why your mother and mother in-law should take the back seat in a show that's rightfully theirs. 198 Likes 11 Shares |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by robinso01(m): 7:37am On Aug 29, 2022 |
On a norms, it's ur wife godmother that ought to take her leave. You can't send ur mother in law to leave because of godmother. The best thing to do is to know how to tell your wife godmother to leave rather than ur mother in law,unless you want to create problem in ur family. Remember that it's ur wife mother we're talking about here. 58 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Nobody: 7:40am On Aug 29, 2022 |
It would be unkind and ungrateful of y'all to ask the godmother who came from another state, to leave. Her mom who just came (knowing fully well that the godmother is there) and who lives down the street from you should wait until the godmother leaves on Wednesday. Her mom will have all the time in the world to spend with y'all thereafter. 122 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Acidosis(m): 7:41am On Aug 29, 2022 |
You want to create problems for yourself because of trends? What is a godmother? I'm sure many don't know the history of some of these trends y'all copy. 17 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by 07kjb: 7:44am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Candidlady: Try to have understanding Since the Godmother is living on Wednesday why can't the Mom wait for just 3 days. U now want to shift the blame on innocent godmother that took the girl as her daughter Her in-law didn't try at all 43 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Creamypie(m): 7:45am On Aug 29, 2022 |
UncleDaddy2017:I don talk am earlier say I no support this omugwo thing cos e don dey taken to another level. We in our immediate family dont send it. My sister who lives in Canada put to bed, my mum, a lecturer just organize mighty ghana na must go bags of dried fish, cow head, ogbono, rice, palm oil,yams, melon beans e.t.c, and way billed it. How can she live her duplex, husband,work and travel to Canada to live in rented flat? Omugwo don dey misinterpreted and used as means, not just to pest the man, and also an opportunity for the mum inlaw and her daughter to hatch the plot to psychologically subjugate and dominate the man... So sad bro..mother in-laws try and respect the sanctity and privacy of marriage of your daughter and her husband. U are wives too nah 39 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Tokskob2008: 7:45am On Aug 29, 2022 |
goodamerican:Ahah.... We are Africans na abbah! I'm pretty sure even the Western onyinbos won't do this, how can I chase my own blood away for a godmother ![]() 7 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by gfon(m): 7:47am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Candidlady:No bad energy Monday |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by LadyRosa(f): 7:48am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Who called the godmother? Why is the MIL not visiting pending when the godmother leaves? Why is the godmother still there even after the MIL arrived with a bag? Why is your wife unreasonable to resolve the issue without even involving you? All three women are so unreasonable but the least is the godmother, she helped you when you needed her the most. 29 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Promosaver: 7:49am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Vawulence is about to rain in that family ![]() Brother na you mother-in-law suppose run ur wife pikin matter,which one con be god mother This ur god mother stuff no valid brother 3 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by 07kjb: 7:49am On Aug 29, 2022 |
If I were you I will send my in-law packing today she's a trouble maker 11 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Acidosis(m): 7:54am On Aug 29, 2022 |
LadyRosa: Yes, she helped the family but not without invitation. The couple caused problems for themselves when they appointed and invited the godmother to do what I don't know even while their mothers live a few distance away. 33 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by cococandy(f): 7:58am On Aug 29, 2022 |
goodamerican:exactly 4 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by LadyRosa(f): 8:01am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Acidosis: The mother that lives across the street yet a godmother was the one sleeping in the hospital on behalf of the wife.And to think she came all the way from another state. I want to know why won't she listen to her husband?Or she blind not to see dude is not sleeping well in his own house?And that taking his bath to relax will be a big challenge as regards inconveniences? Wife wey get sense, will inform the mother of the husband's suggestions and stand with her husband since he begged for a few days to resolve the issue. There's no problem here, except for two unreasonable entitled women who share same maternal mental inconsistencies. As a matter of fact, MIL in any marriage is an intruder.Many of these woman are ready to run down their daughters home like they dis theirs, a wise woman must create a balance.Tell your mom about your husband's suggestions and stand BY HIM to prove it's a better decision as long as he is not cutting her o Let's tell ourselves the truth, his MIL felt threatened that what may be reserved for her as compensation might go to somebody else. 47 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Acidosis(m): 8:07am On Aug 29, 2022 |
LadyRosa: OP never mentioned that both mothers were unwilling to attend to their daughter and the newborn. Knowing very well that they live in a one bedroom apartment, there was no point inviting any godmother from another state. The couple instituted the problems so let's not shift blames to the mother in law. She's doing the same thing any mother would do. 13 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by LadyRosa(f): 8:10am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Acidosis: Oga, the op said the godmother was the person who attended to his wife after she put to bed in the hospital.They made shifts at interval to that effect! You can't just undermine what she has done,afterall someone invited her in the first place! Even if she would go, it shouldn't be in such away that shows she is not wanted in the first place. 14 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Acidosis(m): 8:14am On Aug 29, 2022 |
LadyRosa: I'm not undermining her efforts. However, I won't join you to blame the mother in law. The op and whoever brought up the godmother idea are fully to blame. The op should sleep outside (e.g., hotel) pending the time the godmother would return to her state. There are certain decisions you don't make when you know your situation and condition. 8 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by LadyRosa(f): 8:19am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Acidosis: He will be foo.lish to do that because of three unreasonable woman.Especially when one lives across the street.What he opined us the best option, the MIL must be able to leave till Wednesday as promised by the op. The wife is a very nasty woman indeed! If the godmother was with her while she is bedridden,what stops her from asking her mother to exercise a little patience as her husband demanded? He shouldn't sleep well in a house where he pays the rent?For what?! Nonsense! 24 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by EmahBoss(f): 8:22am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Is your apartment a flat? Please use the bathroom to run your changing clothes for now. And sleep in the sitting room with the godmother. Wednesday is almost here. Just one day in between. Don't make any of them feel unwelcome so you won't be the instigator. Guy man up, it will soon pass 11 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Acidosis(m): 8:25am On Aug 29, 2022 |
LadyRosa: That's why a man ought to be at the top of his game at all times. He probably fell for the idea of inviting a godmother without thinking about the fact that they live in a one bedroom apartment. Women will always come up with fanciful ideas and all that without thinking about the implication. The problem started when they invited the godmother. I ask again, what is the role of a godmother? They are fully to blame please. Why inconvenient another person and make her travel down from another state without thinking about the security implications and their living condition? Who does that? 3 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Baronthecelebri: 8:32am On Aug 29, 2022 |
LadyRosa:yeah, you're right. But women get fish brain 5 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by LadyRosa(f): 8:33am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Acidosis: If they didn't invite the godmother,who would have been in the hospital helping the wife huh? Since the MIL lives across the street,where was she when her daughter put to bed? She felt comfortable since somebody else is keeping awake because of her daughter,now the daughter is back they want to get rid of the woman WITHOUT even making attempt to do it in a Loving and reasonable way. I don't like that! My mom can't do such,it boils down to morals I believe.My mother will definitely make that woman very comfortable and will buy heaven and earth to compensate her. 25 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by LadyRosa(f): 8:34am On Aug 29, 2022 |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Baronthecelebri: 8:36am On Aug 29, 2022 |
LadyRosa:the mother inlaw and the wife 7 Likes |
Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by Baronthecelebri: 8:38am On Aug 29, 2022 |
If I was you,I'll ask my mother inlaw to leave and wait till Wednesday,by then I'll be talking with the my god-mother to prepare her self to leave |
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