pocohantas:
Many men would simp for their wives at some point, but I think it shouldn’t be overplayed in public.

There are some men that do dishes and wash clothes. The wife doesn’t need to go about announcing it that her husband washes clothes or her pant. That should be between them. Especially in a country like Nigeria.

She didn’t have to overplay it in your presence. Even sensible men would be wary about sending their wives unnecessary errands in the presence of his/her siblings. At best they do that thing themselves. But that one sef go bring another wahala. Omo, you can’t please world people o.

The best thing to do was to excuse the husband and tell him in private. That way, she has respected both the husband and his sibling. Nothing consign love for where respect suppose dey. Each one get him own work.

Joeyfizzo:
Pls mind ur business. That is why I stopped my sister from visiting my house. She gossips to family and friends abt wat happens in my house and even add lies to it. She tells dem anything I buy for my wife, she eaves drop in our conversations etc

Jehovah! are you me? My eldest sister lives abroad with her family and we’re close. But you see our 2nd daughter, AKPI! Whenever she visits when I still used to open my home to her, she’s family radio. She’s banned from my house & since her marriage crashed she has been avoiding me too so good for everyone.

She will add maggi and pepper and salt and garnish every story. She wasn’t yet married then. Puppet of all my younger brothers who tell her what to do & say. She used to do all you listed: the lies, spying, eavesdropping & even used to take pics of our fridge & food store and random photos of my wife & food she cooked & even random cartons of electronics we bought, she will snap and send.

And they had a whole group chat where she would share the pics & they’ll make fun of our life. Or is it how she brought jazz into my house which was how many things casted including their group chat where she even told them that she got jazz and they were hailing her as action lady. She said she brought the jazz to help me.
She saw a seer who said my wife is a witch whose only dream is to kill me so she has put me under a spell.

That was her last day stepping foot in my house. Someone that I was still paying for her uni at the time. Someone whose pocket money increased after I met my wife because my wife said university girls need more money & if she lives big she will be bigger than certain things.
The same blackberry I bought for her that year was what she used to snap my house. I paid her fees till she graduated & even stood for her wedding cos our dad is late but I will never trust anyone again with my home & peace of mind.

The only sibling that can set foot in my house today is my eldest sis & her husband and kids when they’re in the country. They accommodated my wife in their home for all her pregnancies & have earned the trust I put in them and they’re doing well for themselves, they dont beg me & i dont beg them, so we can open up to each other about highs and lows without worry. And the rest never liked her from the start but I felt since she’s the eldest & a girl, she wont care but since I’m first son, it’s my responsibility to hold the family together until they showed me cameroon pepper mixed with wasabi and I ran for my life.

Anyone who thinks third parties who you let into your happy life will be happy for you is delusional. If you win lottery today, only the ones that will enjoy the money will be happy for you, the more money they’ll get, the more happy they’ll be for you & the more they envy the one who they feel will enjoy most. If you have something good, protect it or ppl will take it from you. All they want is for your matter to cast so they can gather and fix you like you fix them when they scatter their own life so they can feel important.
Ask the poster if he’s doing better than his brother who he’s pitying now & if he will be honest, he isnt. I know ppl like him. Ndi ike nsi.

If you've never moved out of your mother's house, got yourself a job, paid your bills by yourself and be responsible for someone how can you call another man a simp?


Asking for a friend

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madridguy:
They don collect trouser from your elder brother give him wrapper

This is problem of majority of men of this era, forming woke " westernization ". Wetin even concern me.

That was how a relative resigned from his job to be a full time house husband just to prove to his Wife that he is Woke and a real man.
The most painful part is that the idiot even went as far as telling the wife that some of us tried to discourage him. Now the idiot is begging for financial assistance to enable him buy some personal items.

Me I no get shishi to give him.

Middleborn:


I'm not in support of men who are clueless and weak...they allow the woman be the man of the house, but i want to point out that there could be more to the story.

I say this because i have seen different families and how they could differ due to the personalities of the couples involved.

On this note, imagine if in this story, both husband (his elder brother) and wife are career people and they have 1 or 2 small kids and they don't have a house help. Maybe wife just got pregnant. Wife comes back from work, does her house-keeping and kitchen stuff...many wives in her circumstance need assistance. Maybe she cooking and wants to buy stuff from the provision shop, which is just a few steps from their house and the husband isnt doing anything at the time...she might have also asked politely...why can't he help out? i'm just telling you how it may have happened and how the OP may not have gotten all the details.

I do also think that African civilized society has gotten past that point where the men heaps all the house work on the woman. Some assistance is needed.

Unless you think that the op is clueless about how a home runs or just being dramatic, then his concerns are valid.

Thank you!

DonClericuzo:
I am have to joined Nairaland today to make my comments on this Topic. By God's grace I am married now for 11years, I remember when I was young,as the last borned of the family of seven men, there was this issues in my family, all my other brothers were angry with my eldest brother, except me because I was living with him, the problem was that his wife is the one controlling him, it was a serious crisis, but we thank it was resolved.
Years later, my brothers started to get marry one after the other. Then, the reality of what marriage is , started to hit them one by one, I saw my senior brothers that accused my eldest brother of being controlled by his cook for their wives, scrub for their wives,mark you, my eldest brother for all the years I lived with him never enter the kitchen to cook, but here, all my senior brothers that accused my eldest brother of being a woman wrapper are doing worse things for their wives. Infact,if not for the intervention and wisdom of my eldest brother, one of my senior brothers,who was even at the forefront of this accusations ,his marriage would have crashed, but the man he accused of being controlled by his wife step in to settle his own marital crisis. Why am I sharing this story, many of you calling the man woman wrapper, you are not yet marry.go and marry you will learn what is in marriage. Marriage is a school, you can't learn anything until you enter. Whatever anyone teaches you about marriage is theoretical, you will learn the real thing when you enter. As for you OP, leave your brother and his wife alone, you are a visitor to that home, you don't know what make their marriage work.if you like, when you marry treat your wife anyhow you like,I am happily married for 11years blessed with three kids, I can tell you ,I still do some of these errands you are talking about for my wife. But I have the most beautiful and peaceful home you can only dream of.

Romanoff:


Ah. So what if the guy carries the tray of beans to pick in front of his friends?

Or he decides to help his wife cut vegetables while she's cooking for his friends, there's nothing wrong with that one cause she's not "sending him on an errand" abi?

Even in this same naija, I've seen very very unconventional happy marriages.

What is killing us in this country is thinking same rule works for everyone.

I've seen a home where a woman is the bread winner and she's humble and you'd never know. I've seen a home where the man goes to the market cause his wife hates it.

I've seen a home where the man washes and irons both his clothes and his wife's cause she hates laundry.

I've seen a marriage where the mother cannot cook, the father does the cooking while the mother goes to the market. This people are now grand parents.

This same "respect" wey una dey drag, e dey some marriage wey scatter las las.

If I marry man wey be my friend, why I no go fit send am, why e no go fit send me, e get wetin I no go fit do for am, e get wetin e no spos fit do for me?

A lot of men saying nonsense here are not married.

Ten years from now, many of them go dey there second or third marriage.

No be dictatorship, na partnership.

srclark:
there is no manuscript on how people should live in their marriage ,as long as it works for them fine .Many Nigerian men will boast outside to up their ego but behind closed doors they do the unthinkable some even wash panties .Kindly stay out of their business

Truth801:
Times have changed. Gone are the days when women do the entire domestic work without assistance from their husbands. Secondly, oga OP when you marry your own wife feel free to kick her out if she seeks your assistance with house chores but learn to respect boundaries and leave your brother's family alone.

I and my wife live alone with our set of twins (7 months old), no maid or relative staying with us. We do the domestic work together and I even go to the market alone. Would you have been angry and conclude that my wife is using me if you were my brother ?

Emman08:


My wife is the most respectful woman. If I no help her na YOUR MOTHER I wan help? Who is exchanging words with this cuntface? It's your type that's jobless and still live with their parents, yet you're forming "man". Get a job, earn a living and learn to take care of yourself first before you claim you're a man.

You're a nobody

I understand the fact that your FATHER is a nobody. Look at this SLAVE advising someone You that your "husband" is feeding . Who even told you ,that you're a man? Errand boy forming man.. Go wash plates for your "husband" and kids,before she punishes you for not being a good "wife"

StilmaVsBorn2w:
This is so embarrassing to say, I would never advise a man to be so sluggish in life. It pains my heart having to experience this several times but since he is an elderly bro that senior me very far I can't put my mouth in his family affair because of this.

I went to visit my brother yesterday, was surprised while we were seated in the parlour... the wife told her husband to go check if the woman selling provision is back.

This wasn't the first time, my brother stood up and went.. I was looking at her the whole time, she was looking at me. The anger was so deep but there is nothing I can do.

They are different instances I can give but no need for that...All I just want to say it's not good to be that calm type of guy.

This is not about being the bread winner of the house, my elder brother is doing very well for himself so is his wife.

As a man, it's just not good to be quite always or be quiet all the time.. gentlemanly. I just don't know how to say it.

Guys what do you think?

It seems you live with them to know so much. Better go hustle bro

StilmaVsBorn2w:
This is so embarrassing to say, I would never advise a man to be so sluggish in life. It pains my heart having to experience this several times but since he is an elderly bro that senior me very far I can't put my mouth in his family affair because of this.

I went to visit my brother yesterday, was surprised while we were seated in the parlour... the wife told her husband to go check if the woman selling provision is back.

This wasn't the first time, my brother stood up and went.. I was looking at her the whole time, she was looking at me. The anger was so deep but there is nothing I can do.

They are different instances I can give but no need for that...All I just want to say it's not good to be that calm type of guy.

This is not about being the bread winner of the house, my elder brother is doing very well for himself so is his wife.

As a man, it's just not good to be quite always or be quiet all the time.. gentlemanly. I just don't know how to say it.

Guys what do you think?

But you too couldn't say anything and you are blaming your brother for been quiet. The same reason you were quiet is the same reason your brother is obedient. The woman na manwoman. So, call your brother to a bar and ask him questions, if his answers are genuine, allow them. There is no how, he will take one bottle of legend or two, without telling you the truth. If na bellusome the woman give am, after the 4th bottle, he senses will come back.

StilmaVsBorn2w:
This is so embarrassing to say, I would never advise a man to be so sluggish in life. It pains my heart having to experience this several times but since he is an elderly bro that senior me very far I can't put my mouth in his family affair because of this.

I went to visit my brother yesterday, was surprised while we were seated in the parlour... the wife told her husband to go check if the woman selling provision is back.

This wasn't the first time, my brother stood up and went.. I was looking at her the whole time, she was looking at me. The anger was so deep but there is nothing I can do.

They are different instances I can give but no need for that...All I just want to say it's not good to be that calm type of guy.

This is not about being the bread winner of the house, my elder brother is doing very well for himself so is his wife.

As a man, it's just not good to be quite always or be quiet all the time.. gentlemanly. I just don't know how to say it.

Guys what do you think?

Inform your parents and stop going to their house because the way you said that woman is looking at you I don't trust her

easzypeaszy:
Dis marriage na diff Character man fit see him sef end up dey dis play..All no be Simp Simp
Am married but I do alot
I bath my Son n carry him to school
I get tomatoes and pepper
I go grind it mysef
I buy cooking gas mysef
I go to market most times
I buy tins.. I mean u can see me going out 20tims aday n somtims 5tims within 30mins
I wash my clothes n kids own
I provide 90% of the money in d house
My wife cn Cook 3times fr me everyday
Me naturally I lik waka
But wen am in work dem go find way
Me sha I no dey send person or want person do somtin fr me
But if my wife mess up she collect even my mother inlaw sef dey collect steady wen dey wan try me I no gt shame lik dat
Na just me

Because of my upbringing, I love doing chores as a man, especially cooking. I can simp on my own. But immediately a girl tries to use that on me, I put her in her place. I hate to be told what to do. Because I am one person that don't hesitate to do what I am suppose to do. So, anything I don't do on my own, don't tell me to do it.

I hate simp with passion!!! Simping can kill a man anytime, simping can make a man to turn to a woman, simping can make man a turn to maid in his own huz and simping can make a man hate his family and follow his wife's family... Am not wishing my enemy to simp talk less of my people.

BigYash:
If your say that your FATHER is a nobody,then who are you? Look at this SLAVE advising someone You that your "husband" is feeding . Who even told you ,that you're a man? Errand boy forming man.. Go wash plates for your "husband" and kids,before she punishes you for not being a good "wife"

I will pay your employ YOUR FATHER and pay his pension for life. My wife will employ YOUR MOTHER and pay her pension for life.

It's not my fault you're frustrated and angry. Blame poverty bro

How is that your headache? Mind ur business, allow husband and wife to leave their live peacefully. Every home differs, what works for one might not work for d other

Romanoff:


So it's not "disrespectful" if he's the one that sends the wife.

Abi?

See, you can't judge what respect is base on what you think it is.

It is disrespectful if she was engaged with a quest especially an adult sibling. Such show of power in the disguise called love is wrong. Excuse the person and discuss it in private.

This is so touching. How come you people neglected him to that extent? I felt for him. Many men are in bondage of their wife i swear.

Emotionss:



That was how a relative resigned from his job to be a full time house husband just to prove to his Wife that he is Woke and a real man.
The most painful part is that the idiot even went as far as telling the wife that some of us tried to discourage him. Now the idiot is begging for financial assistance to enable him buy some personal items.

Me I no get shishi to give him.

Emman08:


I will pay your employ YOUR FATHER and pay his pension for life. My wife will employ YOUR MOTHER and pay her pension for life.

It's not my fault you're frustrated and angry. Blame poverty bro

Errand boy and noise.. A wealthy man won't be running errand for his wife,cux he won't even have that time .. He will employ domestic staffs for that purpose.. I hope you can now see how foolish you are? You when no get reach 5m for aza ,come here dey make noise.. You wen ur wife dey use hookup money feed.. Go get a job for yourself first and if you need a job.. Send your CV to my email via pm.. I go help your life ..

Enimin:


Don't mind all those witches

Emotionss:
[color=#006600][/color]That was how a relative resigned from his job to be a full time house husband just to prove to his Wife that he is Woke and a real man.
The most painful part is that the idiot even went as far as telling the wife that some of us tried to discourage him. Now the idiot is begging for financial assistance to enable him buy some personal items.

Me I no get shishi to give him.

I doubt he's in his right mind. If you could help with his deliverance, kindly do.

BigYash:
Errand boy and noise.. A wealthy man won't be running errand for his wife,cux he won't even have that time .. He will employ domestic staffs for that purpose.. I hope you can now see how foolish you are? You when no get reach 5m for aza ,come here dey make noise.. You wen ur wife dey use hookup money feed.. Go get a job for yourself first and if you need a job.. Send your CV to my email via pm.. I go help your life ..

I don't run errands. But like you're too DENSE to understand what pregnancy and sickness is. Who needs a job?

Bro send your account number I swear to God I will pay your rent so you can't move out of your mother's house and be the man you're claiming to be. Quote me here if I don't sent it. Imbècile

StilmaVsBorn2w:
This is so embarrassing to say, I would never advise a man to be so sluggish in life. It pains my heart having to experience this several times but since he is an elderly bro that senior me very far I can't put my mouth in his family affair because of this.

I went to visit my brother yesterday, was surprised while we were seated in the parlour... the wife told her husband to go check if the woman selling provision is back.

This wasn't the first time, my brother stood up and went.. I was looking at her the whole time, she was looking at me. The anger was so deep but there is nothing I can do.

They are different instances I can give but no need for that...All I just want to say it's not good to be that calm type of guy.

This is not about being the bread winner of the house, my elder brother is doing very well for himself so is his wife.

As a man, it's just not good to be quite always or be quiet all the time.. gentlemanly. I just don't know how to say it.

Guys what do you think?

This is not a Yoruba marriage...sure me die

GloriousGbola:


feel free to be one flesh with your brother.

what nonsense

hopefully, if you ever get married, your family members will also be as jobless the op and spend all their free time trooping into your house to observe and report and advise on all the going ons between you and your wife until you are finally separated so that you can marry and live with your family forever

Shut up. "One flesh" like sey una dey gree follow Bible. If dem ask una to behave Bible standards now, una go begin shout "I am not a slave". " One flesh", but una dey carry another person pikin dey dash una man.

Your brother wife no get shame.

zionstaar75:
of course you'll start seeing even guys who prostrate for their girlfriend coming here to form macho.i live I my house pay 85% of the bills and my wife can send me on errands if I'm not doing anything. Do you guys know the meaning of marriage? U want Nigeria to be like USA and UK but our men shouldn't behave like their men abi.Its poor people that have inferiority complex that think like this.if u don't like this please get a maid pay for her and bring her to stay and help out

USA is not the only society doing well. Red pill societies like Saudi Arabia and co are still doing well.

Emman08:


I don't run errands. But like you're too DENSE to understand what pregnancy and sickness is. Who needs a job?

Bro send your account number I swear to God I will pay your rent so you can't move out of your mother's house and be the man you're claiming to be. Quote me here if I don't sent it. Imbècile

If them sell your family all together, you go fit pay 1.8m for rent? Look at this asshole claiming he has money.

Screen shot how much u buy data last,and I will screen shot mine.. Make we see how much money we get.. Mugu! See this boy o.. You think because I'm talking to you,we are mates abi? Oya how much u buy data last? Let's start from there.

Emman08:


I don't run errands. But like you're too DENSE to understand what pregnancy and sickness is. Who needs a job?

Bro send your account number I swear to God I will pay your rent so you can't move out of your mother's house and be the man you're claiming to be. Quote me here if I don't sent it. Imbècile

I pay that,cux abj here where I work,no be where my house dey.. Where are u sef.. Let's meet during the weekend,make we show doings... Before you go say I want kidnap u.. Carry ur security follow body,I will come with my guards too.. Let's meet offline if you be man

2elliot:
It is disrespectful if she was engaged with a quest especially an adult sibling. Such show of power in the disguise called love is wrong. Excuse the person and discuss it in private.

I still maintain that you can't judge based on what you think respect is.

BigYash:
If them sell your family all together, you go fit pay 1.8m for rent? Look at this asshole claiming he has money.

Screen shot how much u buy data last,and I will screen shot mine.. Make we see how much money we get.. Mugu! See this boy o.. You think because I'm talking to you,we are mates abi? Oya how much u buy data last? Let's start from there.

Are you mad? Your mate have their houses and you're boasting about rent or data. Your tiny stupid brain can't even begin to imagine how much I bought my house with. Know your place dunce

seanwilliam:
shut up your dirty mouth. That you’re married to my brother doesn’t give you the temerity to treat him anyhow and throw caution out of window. we’re related by blood and I’m closer to him than you are. ‘no matter the bonds you share with him, you’re still an outsider. If something bad happens to him you can deny him and go your way but someone like me won’t do that !. If that’s how you treat your own husband all in the name of love , fine! But it won’t work with me.
This is Africa. No come Dey form americana for someone like me, I go over embarrass u.

I will put mouth instantly and if my brother is not ok with that then I will shut up by mouth and will never visit them again!.

Mind you, I don’t visit anyone except I’m invited and I rarely honor invitation self. Not all in laws are jobless like yours!


As regards to widow, I have no business poke-nosing in that regards. She’ll be the one to handle her husband’s stuff in order to take care of their children and I will do what I’m supposed to do to support them. Also par-adventure they never had kids together until his demise, then we will have to follow his wills and order.


He’s your husband but he’s my brother first .

@bolded, you're clearly an ignorant fellow if you feel that you are more important than your brother's wife. What happened to two becoming one? You're a child and you need to grow up. I even read your post on what you did to your girlfriend when she gave you a bag to carry and you think that's what makes you a man. You're mean and unkind. I pity your future wife, she is in for a whole lot of pain if you don't change your ridiculous mindset.

Emman08:


Are you mad? Your mate have their houses and you're boasting about rent or data. Your tiny stupid brain can't even begin to imagine how much I bought my house with. Know your place dunce

I can't carry my houses to every city I go.. I have my house and family in lag,and I work in Abj. So where you dey? No more noise.. Let's meet offline. Meanwhile, I'm not mad,but if you can't meet me as man to man in real life,you are the one that is mad..

Romanoff:


Stay out of their business. If your brother ever complains to you that his wife treats him badly and he's not happy, then you can give him advice.

If not, stay out of married people's business.

As long as she's not disrespectful to the man, stay out of their business.


Them go soon settle their issue turn am for your head.

No, dat kind of errand is very disrespectful, even if d husband no mind, she should be smart enough to know dat, Haba
In front of his little bros too, this ain't cool at all

Joeyfizzo:
Pls mind ur business. That is why I stopped my sister from visiting my house. She gossips to family and friends abt wat happens in my house and even add lies to it. She tells dem anything I buy for my wife, she eaves drop in our conversations etc

Oga, please be sure that you are still in frame. My elder brother dey regret till 2moro. While in Nigeria, his wife systematically made him drove all his siblings away. In fact, one of my sister own sister own shocked me when he sent her away for seeing his wife's unclothedness. Lol. According to my sister, the wife asked her to bring her cream for her while she was in the bathroom. And that that was what she did and was even careful by closing her eyes and not opening the door wide. She stretch her hands to handover the cream to her. But the wife told my bro that his sister saw her uncladness. He got angry and drove her way. His wife finally showed him pepper when he was left alone by all of us in the family. They travelled abroad, and she used that opportunity to almost destroyed him and sent him to jail.