My boy of almost three years behaves very absurd each time a fight ensued between him and my nephew..Ofcourse my boy is older (11 months) than my nephew..He cried when this boy hit him and sometimes he came to report to me..This I so much hate because I'm very temperamental..I have warned my boy not to cry and beat him when the boy tries to be stupid..But very sad that my own boy still not acti8as I wanted..This has really made me to abuse his mother that he took the stupidity from her and we fought over this..I've beaten my boy black and blue over this but the situation persists..HELP ME ON WHAT TO DO FATHERS AND MOTHERS HERE...

AKEEMBOY:
My boy of almost three years behaves very absurd each time a fight ensued between him and my nephew..Ofcourse my boy is older (11 months) than my nephew..He cried when this boy hit him and sometimes he came to report to me..This I so much hate because I'm very temperamental..I have warned my boy not to cry and beat him when the boy tries to be stupid..But very sad that my own boy still not acti8as I wanted..This has really made me to abuse his mother that he took the stupidity from her and we fought over this..I've beaten my boy black and blue over this but the situation persists..HELP ME ON WHAT TO DO FATHERS AND MOTHERS HERE...

Why in the world would you beat a 3-year-old black and blue for crying when hit by another boy, regardless of age? Are you yourself correct upstairs?

There's no love in fearing someone.

There are so many ways to discipline a child rather than use violence, and if you teach your children from a young age on the importance of respecting each other, there wouldn't be a need for violence, especially between the siblings.

If you teach your kids to fight each other, they'll grow up with that mentality of saying, the only solution to a problem is violence.

And no offense, but many of you African fathers don't really know what it means to be a parent, or to be a good father, so I'm not surprised that it's a man saying all this.

Truvelisback:
Good day, fellas. Allow ur older child(male or female) to beat ur younger ones. If the younger one dares the older child in a fight, allow them to fight. Don't defend the younger ones. u know why? If the older child keep beating the younger child, when they grow up to be man or woman, the younger child would still have that fear and regard for the older. Some parents(most especially mothers) ignorantly and unconcious make the younger one(s) not to respect the older ones by defending the younger ones in a fight or quarrel and making them have the effontry to exchange words with their older ones. If this continues, when they grow up, the younger ones would rarely have any fear or regard for their elder brother or elder sister.

Kobojunkie:
Why in the world would you beat a 3-year-old black and blue for crying when hit by another boy, regardless of age? Are you yourself correct upstairs?

Have you proffered solutions to the incident narrated?

Samantha123:
There's no love in fearing someone.

There are so many ways to discipline a child rather than use violence, and if you teach your children from a young age on the importance of respecting each other, there wouldn't be a need for violence, especially between the siblings.

If you teach your kids to fight each other, they'll grow up with that mentality of saying, the only solution to a problem is violence.

And no offense, but many of you African fathers don't really know what it means to be a parent, or to be a good father, so I'm not surprised that it's a man saying all this.

Some kids are stubborn and may not want to respect or have regard for their older ones.

AKEEMBOY:
Have you proffered solutions to the incident narrated?

How can I proffer a solution when the problem isn't the child but the adult in the child's life?

Why not take the opportunity to teach the 2-year-old not to beat on anything, even his older nephew? Violence, after all, is never a good thing to allow kids to learn.

sisisioge:




Thank you o. My friend has two kids aged 8 and 4. The 4yrs old is a male while the 8yrs is a female. When they start fighting, the boy fights dirty....throwing punches at the girl's belly, face....anywhere like he wants to kill her. Hian! Their mother doesnt even want to tolerate any fight or raise them into violent people. Which one is encouraging older to beat younger or allowing a fight? Family should be all about the loving arms not the hating fists. Some families who hate one another have this feeling dating as far back as their childhood fa. God forbid bad thing!

I doubt their ages. How can a 4 yrs old boy beat up a 8yrs old girl? He Is too young to beat her up. Abi, she be handicap?

There are other ways to discipline them rather than use violence..

Create a naughty room in the house and take the child to the room when he or she starts to misbehave.

If he or she keeps on misbehaving, lock him or her inside until he's or she's calmed down and ready to apologise.. And let the child know why you're locking him or her.

And deprive him or her some things she or he likes in the house as punishment afterwards, just so he or she could know that what he or she did is really bad.

It's the duty of the parents to instill discipline in the children, not those of the older kids in the house and violence never solved anything.

Truvelisback:
Some kids are stubborn and may not want to respect or have regard for their older ones.

Truvelisback:
I doubt their ages. How can a 4 yrs old boy beat up a 8yrs old girl? He Is too young to beat her up. Abi, she be handicap?

You've not been around a lot of these young boys, the dude is too active and fast. Before the sister is getting ready to beat him, he had hit her mindlessly not minding where he hits. If that guy should hit you when you're not expecting, you sef will double over. I learnt to avoid rough plays with him and just keep him busy with drawings and stories...the dude is strong. To take him out is another problem....you dare not not hold him tightly in public. Whew!

sisisioge:




You've not been around a lot of these young boys, the dude is too active and fast. Before the sister is getting ready to beat him, he had hit her mindlessly not minding where he hits. If that guy should hit you when you're not expecting, you sef will double over. I learnt to avoid rough plays with him and just keep him busy with drawings and stories...the dude is strong. To take him out is another problem....you dare not not hold him tightly in public. Whew!

What i will do is that, i will hold the two hands of the boy and ensure she beats him. If him no cry, i no go leave am until him cry.

Kobojunkie:
That is a bloody lie!

I know about lies, but I no know lie wey dey cot blood.

The fact that your younger one beats you doesn't mean everyone is weak like you

OP...
This is true, until the younger one gets to a certain age...

I for one know for CERTAINTY that my elder sister can't beat in a fight...buh I respect her so much so that I don't even dare call her by name, na "sister" I dey call am...

And no..
It's not because she beat me up when I was younger...

There's something called mutual respect...
If you teach your kids ((both old and young)) not to be disrespectful to each other, there will be no need for anyone to beat anyone up

U have a point. I have a friend like who is stubborn could fight anyone if angered but he respects his elder ones and calls them "Brother". Even if they scold him for doing wrong, he does disrepect them. But i know of another guy like disrespects his elder bro even in the public. I think the mum caused it. When they were very young, the mother used to side the younger. However, there are atimes, if someone talks ill abt his elder bro, he would defend him.