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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Do I Forgive Him? (65882 Views)
My Sister Has Been Finding It Difficult To Forgive Our Aunt. / Should I Forgive Her? / Why Nigerian Men Hardly Forgive A Cheating Woman (2) (3) (4)
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Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by missimelda01(f): 4:45pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
The painful part is your husband's refusal to accept his fault ![]() 4 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Karleb(m): 4:54pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
This one is not a serious human being. The man is begging, you are doing shakara. Wait until he marries another lady. 48 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Lekan239(m): 5:09pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
Registeredguest:how do men usually end up with women like this. You end marriage bcus of this little thing. Through ur story I can see you are well to do than your husband. Money na bastard o. If that man is loaded you won't be behaving like this Thank God for the peace in my home o 45 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Ok12345(f): 6:09pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
Lol ![]() U never ready for marriage... He is even begging you to come back,by the time bukata comes after birthing 2 Kids and you alone shoulder the responsibility, u go hear am. If you can't forgive this,what if he cheats on you, you will kill him....you have a long way to go if u want to stay married 50 Likes 7 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by olusam4: 6:32pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
This is a fabricated story abeg 2 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Kirkman: 7:46pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
I am sorry but I nor dey chook mouth for husband and wife matter. Make una sort unaselves out. Las las Na I love you, I love you go still end this fight. 4 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Justkatty(f): 8:00pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
I don't really know o, but while reading this, I was eager to see if I'll see something like a side chick abi mistress but I didn't which I am glad. Since there's no woman involved or domestic violence just don't trust him with money anymore and go back to him. Maybe you'll start building yourself on how to absorb shock from anyone. 13 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Rexymania(m): 8:08pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
What your husband did was wrong but wetin I know... I don't judge people. Forgive him na, or tell him to apologize. To all Men, No marry woman wey get money pass you... Omo na f up. God no go shame us 5 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Acidosis(m): 8:13pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
I'm his wife,no be today man dey collect him wife money. He's right, but obtaining money by inflating prices is wrong. You're also right to feel any way you want, but please, it's time to calm down. His father travelled all the way to beg and you still cannot forgive? That's a good man right there. If I were his father, I wouldn't step a foot out of my home, please. I'll just request your account details and wire you your money straight up. Let nobody disturb my life. It's your home, so learn to manage it. Also, try to console yourself by looking back to the good times. I'm sure there were days he spent lavishly on you, buying you gifts, clothing, phones, accessories, etc. without stress. And lastly, try to calm down. Be zealous but don't be overzealous. The last person you want to compete with is your husband. I think he has some elements of goodness in him. Some egoistic men would send back your money in double folds immediately after you parked out and ensure that you don't return to the house. Also, try to find out why he acted that way. Having him knee down to beg suggests that he's either broke or something. Your opening paragraph already suggests that you guys are trying to outdo each other in your marriage. Just focus on his goodness and calm down because....wo, if you jam someone like me, I go double your money and wish you well ![]() 35 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Nobody: 8:20pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
Registeredguest: .. 53 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Nobody: 8:37pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
Hmmm |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Chnbanc: 9:51pm On Oct 20, 2022 |
olusam4:I swear 5 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by gift2xl: 12:56am On Oct 21, 2022 |
But the man no do well, forgive and move on. Thank God it's not cheating issue. 2 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Vision101(m): 2:16am On Oct 21, 2022 |
Op's problem is that she married early. She does not know the value of marriage. She did not bind and cast before she got a husband. If I were your husband i will consider it rude that you should ask me to get a property that you will buy in your name. If you don't believe in the concept of ours in marriage then you can go ahead and source your property and buy without me. Your husband lowered himself the most by taking a cut from the fee you paid. From your explanation he appears not to be doing badly. Why should he lower himself. All your steps showed that you don't believe in this marriage. Within months you have moved to your sister's place, hired your own accommodation and packed your belongings. As a marriage counselor this is one of the craziest action that I have heard from a married woman. Accept everyone's apology and move back to your family. There are so many hawks around ooo. 38 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by gannod(m): 7:19am On Oct 21, 2022 |
You are still pained by the 200k. It is bad he defrauded you of the money but you made it worse by moving out. Well the mistake you made was leaving the house in the first place. Regardless of whatever might have happened between the two of you, you should not have left the house. One thing I deduce from this is, financially, you are stronger hence your arrogance. Go back to your husband and stop this drama. 10 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by DontBullshitMe: 7:43am On Oct 21, 2022 |
Why were you digging around his phone? 29 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Riverrun: 8:01am On Oct 21, 2022 |
Registeredguest: Though you said no insult, I am sorry I would still insult you. YOU ARE A FOOLISH WOMAN. If I was your husband, the day you packed out is the day the marriage ends for real. So when your children grow and ask you why you left their father then you open your mouth to say this nonsense you wrote up there. Just imagine this rubbish, what your husband did was business though as family he was not supposed to add something in your case. But all the same, the 200k he collected is still in the family. Your husband does things for you with his money, this is normal to you. Him benefiting from your money should not be a reason for you to throw tantrums. If you check well how he spent the money you will still see that more than 60% of that money was consumed by you directly or indirectly. You go about disgracing your family for paltry sum. Something that can be resolved in-house, now everyone knows how wicked, unforgiving and stingy you are that even your husband had to lie to get something from you. You are pregnant now you remember your children needs a father in their life. Why don't your money play the role of a father? See if you know you are coming back without forgetting that matter totally you better remain where you are. Don't come and give that man headache. The poor man must have thought he married a help meet. Infact you are vexing me, go. 105 Likes 18 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Socratiz: 8:39am On Oct 21, 2022 |
I find several undefined goals in your marriage, especially in the area of family finances. Though married you are each living individual lives which does not enhance marital bond and camaraderie. It is also unhelpful to disclose your challenges to your family. Better to relate with a marriage counselor who will employ his professional skills to guide you. I doubt if either of you has the skills to handle this without the support of a marriage counselor so, I advise you contact one. Your marriage does not have to crash because of this but get help now. You can contact me if you wish. 4 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Medianna(f): 8:52am On Oct 21, 2022 |
Rexymania:But she never said she was the bread winner ahh! 3 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by boxer022(m): 9:12am On Oct 21, 2022 |
I understand your anger with what he did that led to this present situation in your home. I have not seen or heard that a married woman bought land for herself alone. Family came in to try to bring peace between the two of you but rather than have peace in your home, there is instead turmoil in your home. From the write up it looks as if you make more money than him and if that is the case, I get your anger. You need to look inwardly to try to look for what makes the both of you happy which I might say is the well-being of your children. You have to use that as an anchor point to pardon him. You said you need a father for your expectant child, but I want you to understand that even the ones you have now still needs their father. You can also for the sake of love which brought you two together as one forgive him. I know that you are really hurt by his actions and inactions, but find a place in your heart to forgive him. I also know that you find it difficult to trust him again, but start first with forgiving him and gradually learn to trust him again. Sorry for your present hurtful feeling. 2 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Calibrator: 11:23am On Oct 21, 2022 |
If all married men decide to divorce their wives because of misappropriation of family funds, there will be no immediate family structure left in the world. You are not ready to keep your home intact, seems like you are the kind of lady who think since she has a stable financial portfolio, she can move out of her marital home and survive on her own..... Funny thing is that I have a girlfriend with this exact mindset and I am waiting for jungle to mature before I remove the absorber from her shock. You are doing well! 48 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Nobody: 11:38am On Oct 21, 2022 |
Men watch out for the kind of families you marry from!!! You moved out of your matrimonial home over an issue that has nothing to do with infidelity, domestic violence, physical and emotional abuse! Your sister gladly accommodated you after hearing your stupid excuse! Your father is even asking you not to accept him after his own people have made several overtures for peace. Madam; your are from a terrible family!! 96 Likes 15 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Ok12345(f): 12:06pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
redseason: Very toxic and egoistic family. The man will leave a lonely sad life if he continues like this. 35 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by LilMissFavvy(f): 12:37pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
I know you may want to delay in going back to your husband because you rented an apartment for yourself, but my advice is that you should forget your new house and go back to your hubby. Forgive him, he did bad, but go back now, for It is not good for married people to live apart. What happened is a lesson, so as you go back "always watch your back", never trust a man'. Keep that trust for your children, thank God you are blessed with children already. 3 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Nobody: 1:33pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
Gloriagee:No, RozRozz isn't unsympathetic to her fellow woman, rather she is not supporting stupidity from her fellow woman which is very okay. Op is very toxic and unforgiving, she's not a team player and got married with a very independent mindset which is very wrong for marriage. So what her husband didn't give her back the money refunded? Did he stop her from purchasing the land? Did he divert the whole money? Was he not remorseful and apologetic for his actions. Why does op think she can crucify him for a mistake? She no dey spend his money too? And to think she allowed this little issue linger till it finally crashed her marriage is very stupid to any sensible person out there. Is she perfect? Lol....she even had to let family get involved in such silly matter. The families and husband get time ![]() Op may be successful financially but she's really immature in handling marital issues, is the exit door the next available option because she can pay her bills. This is one of the reasons some people believe woman can't handle power or financial liberation. She should stay in her rented apartment and continue to dream of her perfect family pictures she's too intolerant and immature to bring into reality. Katikati! 47 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by missimelda01(f): 2:17pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
Vision101:Marriage counselor isonu All you did was blame her and saw nothing wrong in what her husband did. Did you provide a reasonable solution? No You can give your opinion but stop deceiving yourself by saying you're a marriage counselor. 3 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by eyinjuege: 3:04pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
Persephone1: Please stop trying to sugar coat theft and dishonesty. A man that will lie beside you, exchange bodily fluids with you and then collude with an outsider to defraud you can do and undo, so I understand where OP is coming from. He's just opened his wife up for his friends, relatives and associates to try and defraud her. While I would advise her to forgive her husband, if she isn't ready to do so, don't try to make her the toxic one here. That man has destroyed the trust in their marriage and its just a shell there at the moment. It will take time to build the trust back And please don't go into marriage with the mindset of defrauding your wife. It never ends well, and vice versa 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Chnbanc: 3:15pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
missimelda01:Vision101 has a far more better and Reasonable opinion than you. 4 Likes |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Nobody: 3:25pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
eyinjuege:Where was it stated that the man 'collide' with an outsider? I've read all manner of words to qualify this man's action on this thread, one typed he "scammed" the wife and I wonder if you all will use these words if the case was reversed. He withheld the money, true but that doesn't serve as scam or "colliding" when it comes to couples living together. Biko, let's learn not to treat partners as strangers because of their flaws or single errors especially when they are of opposite gender. Women do these things too but you don't see their husbands calling them all sorts of names. Na person wey bring her issue here I blame. 34 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by missimelda01(f): 3:34pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
Chnbanc:Who ask you? Birds of a feather You better carry your empty brain out of my mention |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by 4ward4: 3:41pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
Registeredguest: if this story is true ,your unforgiven nature Is Second to none and I won't wish anyone I know having you. Now you know the man you got married to , we get to discover new things in our partners immediately we get married and this is one of them . If the table was turned , men over looks it just for peace to reign ,and reason because they have no place to run to and with time the family goes back to normal. Alot of men have been duped by the wife and her family's, and heaven never fell nor did he chase her out. Got a car and within a week madam wrecked it, that hurts also, but as a man we know money shouldn't control a relationship, we were grateful for life and move on. 37 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: How Do I Forgive Him? by Chnbanc: 3:42pm On Oct 21, 2022 |
missimelda01: Are you pained? ![]() |
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