Good morning nairalanders, I want you to shed more light on what is bothering me. I want to know if all men don't like their wives family visiting them or it is just individual preference. I have a man who is always aggressive anything his wife's siblings come to visit them. He starts acting anyhow towards them and even towards the wife himself. His wife must seek permission from him before any of her family members can come to visit him, but his family members can come anytime they like ( he claims that he forget to tell his wife) Funny enough, his brother is living with them ever since they got married. As at now, I heard an information that he doesn't even want to see any of her siblings again.
Is this attitude common to men or he is just being heartless? This issue is even making me sacred of marriage because I don't want to end up with a man that doesn't love or respect my family.
I need your response and advice.

That's why there's courtship.. It's a time you get to know more about ur partner and do ur observations if he/she is someone u can cope with... But sharwama and cold stone ice cream no dey allow babes think with their head again

The same way women don't like their husbands family members come visiting

If I was married, I wouldn't also want our family members visiting constantly or staying with us because it's our matrimonial home and we deserve some privacy.

We would've gotten married so that we could leave our families behind and start a family of our own, and I'd expect our family members to respect that. They can visit once in a while, but not stay, even if they do, it must just be for few days or a week. Maybe during Christmas or Easter.

I have a sister who's been married for 15 years and I've only visited her house 3 times, 2011, 2014, and 2021. And I only spent the night once because I respect her and her husband's privacy.

I have another sister who's been married for 5 years and I've never been to her house before, but we're all still close as they always visit whenever they have time along with their husbands and kids.

privacies should be respected

Nigerian men and women only discuss wedding and not marriage...that is why most marriages crash after wedding. They start saying abominable things about their partners.

They don't discuss money,never.

They don't discuss children and how many they can take care of,never!

They don't have any marriage goals other than wedding preparations and unnecessary expenses.

They don't talk building together,that is why u hear arguments over properties and whose name is not there.never.

They don't talk about their partners having a job,so as not to be liabilities unto themselves.

They don't talk about families,mothers in laws and sister in laws and fathers in law...here where most ladies see mother in laws as night witch.

They don't even talk about their temperaments which has led many to become punching bags.

I wonder what they discuss.


As a single,I remember the day I once stroke a deal with my wife,that no matter the level of our quarrels our both parents should never be involved and I told her that our disagreements should not exceed 24hours.

And that has worked till this day.
Men and women should discuss these things and it would help your marriage alot. Help your wives bath your children even if u have a nanny,help in your little spare time in the kitchen as it helps in bonding the relationship.

Marriage is good and even sweeter but it requires so much work,the work there can make u feel like going back to your single days. But in all,it is fulfilling honestly.

viyon02:
The same way women don't like their husbands family members come visiting

Especially the woman that gave birth to the Husband they married (in some cases tho)

Okay.

Pells:

Because you are unmarried and can easily snatch your sisters husband
With your body counts dragging with the age of Buhari
Your kpekus go don wide pass Mediterranean Sea
Stop been a Thot

Jasmineogunde:
Good morning nairalanders, I want you to shed more light on what is bothering me. I want to know if all men don't like their wives family visiting them or it is just individual preference. I have a man who is always aggressive anything his wife's siblings come to visit them. He starts acting anyhow towards them and even towards the wife himself. His wife must seek permission from him before any of her family members can come to visit him, but his family members can come anytime they like ( he claims that he forget to tell his wife) Funny enough, his brother is living with them ever since they got married. As at now, I heard an information that he doesn't even want to see any of her siblings again.
Is this attitude common to men or he is just being heartless? This issue is even making me sacred of marriage because I don't want to end up with a man that doesn't love or respect my family.
I need your response and advice.

there are two sides but i will talk of some of man's view, some relaltives see the son-law as cash cow, were they visit get treated well and return with cash and gifts. Which sometimes is surplas budget on the son- law

You find that father-in-law prefer to visit son-law because gets treats there

Abi make I use my wife fmly as a case study

May be during the marriage preparation the inlaw were not nice to the man,so he decided to treat them that way

Ok