babythug:
Good morning everyone!

Watching the queen’s funeral?

I need some urgent advise and contributions on a parenting issue please

I have three sons and the first is 14. We’ve just moved here and they’ve settled in quite well. Like a typical oyinbo teenager he “wants” to go out - play basketball, football, hang out with friends etc which I don’t like and mostly * don’t allow.

During the summer it was war

Pick your battles. At 16, he can move out with state help into his own place so that's not far off and you want to avoid him drawing his own battle lines at all costs. Naija style unilateral parenting does not work well here at all.

I would have a discussion with him and
1. Tell him your worries and why they are valid worries - please don't use statements like I'm your parent and know better.
2. Ask him how he will mitigate those worries - agree with him what will work or not work ie he can go 3 days a week (Thu/ Fri/ Sat), establish a curfew, he has to tell you before leaving and give a reasonable time for returning - ie if he says 6pm then he should be home latest 6.15pm or message you that he will be late
3. I'd get him a part time job (at 14 he can work upto 10 hours a week) - that will use up either all his Sat or Sun for one shift.
4. Establish boundaries - healthy ones and not unilateral ones. You want to know his friends, repercussions for breaking trust etc. Establish some hard boundaries - ie a definite no go such as must not sleep outside the house without your full agreement, must not skip school etc
5. Avoid fire and brimstones and threats

Lastly, breathe, you got this!

heaven2earth:
Please anyone with link to an affordable accommodation in Liverpool?

Areas with good environment and affordable rents are Widnes, Speke L24, Garston L19, Halewood though they are more I can't remember but if you like the feel of being in naija. Then head to kessington area (quite rugged and dirty). I reside in Speke L24 and it's quite nice with a few black families and less wahala..

obitryce:


Areas with good environment and affordable rents are Widnes, Speke L24, Garston L19, Halewood though they are more I can't remember [b]but if you like the feel of being in naija. [/b]Then head to kessington area (quite rugged and dirty). I reside in Speke L24 and it's quite nice with a few black families and less wahala..

Where do mums get their diapers ooooo

Suzam:
Where do mums get their diapers ooooo

For my first child I bought pampers.... terrible quality with high price ....

Second child i tried little angel asda and never looked back. The price is cheaper but that not even the thing, the quality is way way better than pampers. Wipes I tend to wait till pampers is on sale. When on sale for wipes I buy like 6 to 10 box and store

Suzam:
Where do mums get their diapers ooooo

If you want to spend lots of money, buy pampers. Otherwise, just buy the brand of one of the big stores: Asda, Lidl, Aldi.

Woah good to be here, I'm a mother of 3 coming into the UK soon.
Started from page one. Well-done mothers.

Please how do I go about working from home and customer care work?

Pls assist a fresher.
Thank you �

Pacypatty:
Woah good to be here, I'm a mother of 3 coming into the UK soon.
Started from page one. Well-done mothers.

Please how do I go about working from home and customer care work?

Pls assist a fresher.
Thank you �

Indeed is your best friend

gistbite:


Indeed is your best friend

Thanks sis

Please I need advice about my child high school allocation in Salford . We just got a letter from the council that there is no space in all the schools we applied for except we if can consider another nearby high school that is ready to accept her. On checking the ofsted rating of the school I discovered that it rated " need improvement" and I am not comfortable at all about some not too good review I was getting about the school being a 90% all white school and they are notorious for bullying kids of other minority race.
I am at delimmna here whether to accept the school or not and the condition I am given if I am not accepting the school that I will need to give a convincing reason why I am not accepting it and I will need to tell them the provision I will take to educate my child till I get another school as the waiting list will be up to 31st of December for other schools.
Abeg advice me o.

Hi everyone, I got admission to Swansea University, Wales. Pls, I need insight into life over there as I'll be going with my family. School, job, lifestyles, etc

jum33:
Please I need advice about my child high school allocation in Salford . We just got a letter from the council that there is no space in all the schools we applied for except we if can consider another nearby high school that is ready to accept her. On checking the ofsted rating of the school I discovered that it rated " need improvement" and I am not comfortable at all about some not too good review I was getting about the school being a 90% all white school and they are notorious for bullying kids of other minority race.
I am at delimmna here whether to accept the school or not and the condition I am given if I am not accepting the school that I will need to give a convincing reason why I am not accepting it and I will need to tell them the provision I will take to educate my child till I get another school as the waiting list will be up to 31st of December for other schools.
Abeg advice me o.

I would turn it down and state that it is not a suitable school for a child who is new to the UK, the UK education system and consequently may potentially struggle as the school does not have the proper systems in place to support your child transition into the UK education system.

Download the OFSTED report- highlight all the issues and particularly any issues that refer to race and bullying. Include that your child is new in the country and deserves a suitable place of education where there is effective systems and support in place to enable them integrate and access a suitable education. That is more than reason enough to decline.

Also state that the LEA must provide a suitable place of education for your child so they need to make the provision. It's a legal requirement - throw the ball right back in their court.
Any reviews you find especially from parents of ethnic minority children - include it.

Ticha:


I would turn it down and state that it is not a suitable school for a child who is new to the UK, the UK education system and consequently may potentially struggle as the school does not have the proper systems in place to support your child transition into the UK education system.

Download the OFSTED report- highlight all the issues and particularly any issues that refer to race and bullying. Include that your child is new in the country and deserves a suitable place of education where there is effective systems and support in place to enable them integrate and access a suitable education. That is more than reason enough to decline.

Also state that the LEA must provide a suitable place of education for your child so they need to make the provision. It's a legal requirement - throw the ball right back in their court.
Any reviews you find especially from parents of ethnic minority children - include it.

I wish I could like this twice.

Good day everyone,
Please does anyone know if the big difference water discount offered by severn trent is public fund? I've searched and searched but can't seem to get anything on it. The customer care team also doesn't seem to know anything about it. Please help if you can.

mumzt:
Good day everyone,
Please does anyone know if the big difference water discount offered by severn trent is public fund? I've searched and searched but can't seem to get anything on it. The customer care team also doesn't seem to know anything about it. Please help if you can.

Post this on the main thread as well. So people who use their service can advice.

Mamatukwas:


Post this on the main thread as well. So people who use their service can advice.

Thank you. I'll do that now

Please can anyone in England confirm if household income is less than £26k, a household with one child is entitled to 15hours at 2 years old. My sister said her brp was taken and confirmed NRPF and they said it’s fine. I have also checked online and I am seeing on the government site that NRPF can still be gotten but I just want to be sure. Thanks

Susom:
Please can anyone in England confirm if household income is less than £26k, a household with one child is entitled to 15hours at 2 years old. My sister said her brp was taken and confirmed NRPF and they said it’s fine. I have also checked online and I am seeing on the government site that NRPF can still be gotten but I just want to be sure. Thanks

Noo 15 hours for 2 years should be public funds.... 15 hours for 3 years is not public funds but at 2 years is

Tor I thought so too but what I am seeing on gov.uk is making it difficult to convince her and she is on tier 4 Visa. Also, I know that it is specifically for “disadvantaged” children

LagosismyHome:


Noo 15 hours for 2 years should be public funds.... 15 hours for 3 years is not public funds but at 2 years is

Ticha:


Pick your battles. At 16, he can move out with state help into his own place so that's not far off and you want to avoid him drawing his own battle lines at all costs. Naija style unilateral parenting does not work well here at all.

I would have a discussion with him and
1. Tell him your worries and why they are valid worries - please don't use statements like I'm your parent and know better.
2. Ask him how he will mitigate those worries - agree with him what will work or not work ie he can go 3 days a week (Thu/ Fri/ Sat), establish a curfew, he has to tell you before leaving and give a reasonable time for returning - ie if he says 6pm then he should be home latest 6.15pm or message you that he will be late
3. I'd get him a part time job (at 14 he can work upto 10 hours a week) - that will use up either all his Sat or Sun for one shift.
4. Establish boundaries - healthy ones and not unilateral ones. You want to know his friends, repercussions for breaking trust etc. Establish some hard boundaries - ie a definite no go such as must not sleep outside the house without your full agreement, must not skip school etc
5. Avoid fire and brimstones and threats

Lastly, breathe, you got this!

Good advise and post allround. Thanks for always taking the time out to articulate your points.

@mamatukwas thank you for this thread oo finally caught up on all pages

To everyone for keeping it moving, pls keep sharing tips,questions and challenges for us newbies into this UK journey.

Susom:
Tor I thought so too but what I am seeing on gov.uk is making it difficult to convince her and she is on tier 4 Visa. Also, I know that it is specifically for “disadvantaged” children

.

I think the website is clear, any fund you are submitting NI and documents to obtain is most likely public fund. Pls tell her to steer clear especially on Tier 4. UKVi won't be smiling when it's time for post grad renewal or any other type of visa application for that matter. Some assume if its skilled worker visa, then UKVi won't bother. They don't play with that NRPF

Hi everyone- will appreciate every input or tips I can get especially from experienced parents.

Our little one (9 months plus) started day care last month when wifey's maternity leave ended. Ever since she started, if it's not cough today, it's cattarh or fever, infact there was a time she had conjuctivitis (apolo) also. It's just two months now and we are tired. We are currently battling cough, cattarh and fever (2nd time in 4 weeks). We've taken her to the GP twice and the doctors more or less just said "welcome to the club" and that it's normal. Just said we should continue to use calpol, calcough or nurofen.
To be honest, the cough/fever is not weighing her down as she feeds and plays normally, just that it's always worrisome having to watch her breath with blocked nose and bouts of cough. If it were to be in naija, grandparents would have swung into action with different remedies but over here, na only calpol we here .End of rant!!!

Please is this normal? What other home remedies can we explore? Looking forward to your responses

Stevepop:
Hi everyone- will appreciate every input or tips I can get especially from experienced parents.

Our little one (9 months plus) started day care last month when wifey's maternity leave ended. Ever since she started, if it's not cough today, it's cattarh or fever, infact there was a time she had conjuctivitis (apolo) also. It's just two months now and we are tired. We are currently battling cough, cattarh and fever (2nd time in 4 weeks). We've taken her to the GP twice and the doctors more or less just said "welcome to the club" and that it's normal. Just said we should continue to use calpol, calcough or nurofen.
To be honest, the cough/fever is not weighing her down as she feeds and plays normally, just that it's always worrisome having to watch her breath with blocked nose and bouts of cough. If it were to be in naija, grandparents would have swung into action with different remedies but over here, na only calpol we here .End of rant!!!

Please is this normal? What other home remedies can we explore? Looking forward to your responses

I can imagine how you feel. We had same feeling when our son started nursery. They claim here you should expect that fever and flu 10 times in a year. So that’s like ruffly once a month. They see it as normal and doctors too told us “welcome to the club”. I have accepted it as normal. For our son we use honey for everything, food and sometimes some spoon to clear cough. It’s not a good feeling but I will advise you to join the club like they said.

We started giving our son fruits when he clocked 6months, that was in Naija, we gave him blended apple and banana. Avocados and tangerines on a regular too. The aim was/is to boost his immune function and it worked cos he didn’t fall sick at all till he joined nursery n covid. Just ask doctors if it’s fine to give your child fruits like tangerines, apple, bananas, avocados n its likes. I think it will help fight some of those little ones.

Chreze:


I can imagine how you feel. We had same feeling when our son started nursery. They claim here you should expect that fever and flu 10 times in a year. So that’s like ruffly once a month. They see it as normal and doctors too told us “welcome to the club”. I have accepted it as normal. For our son we use honey for everything, food and sometimes some spoon to clear cough. It’s not a good feeling but I will advise you to join the club like they said.

We started giving our son fruits when he clocked 6months, that was in Naija, we gave him blended apple and banana. Avocados and tangerines on a regular too. The aim was/is to boost his immune function and it worked cos he didn’t fall sick at all till he joined nursery n covid. Just ask doctors if it’s fine to give your child fruits like tangerines, apple, bananas, avocados n its likes. I think it will help fight some of those little ones.

So good to read your experience, at least I know we are not alone. We've been giving her fruits but just occasionally. Guess we have to be deliberate about it. Thanks once again.

Stevepop:
Hi everyone- will appreciate every input or tips I can get especially from experienced parents.

Our little one (9 months plus) started day care last month when wifey's maternity leave ended. Ever since she started, if it's not cough today, it's cattarh or fever, infact there was a time she had conjuctivitis (apolo) also. It's just two months now and we are tired. We are currently battling cough, cattarh and fever (2nd time in 4 weeks). We've taken her to the GP twice and the doctors more or less just said "welcome to the club" and that it's normal. Just said we should continue to use calpol, calcough or nurofen.
To be honest, the cough/fever is not weighing her down as she feeds and plays normally, just that it's always worrisome having to watch her breath with blocked nose and bouts of cough. If it were to be in naija, grandparents would have swung into action with different remedies but over here, na only calpol we here .End of rant!!!

Please is this normal? What other home remedies can we explore? Looking forward to your responses

That why I am dreading nursery and have been doing nanny. Although I prefer nursery than nanny .... however nursery they spread germs up and down so what you are seeing is quite common. When I went to pick nursey form there was a big sign that foot and mouth is here

Don't bother with different remedies.... viral infection clears on their own. Capol occasionally is fine

LagosismyHome:


That why I am dreading nursery and have been doing nanny. Although I prefer nursery than nanny .... however nursery they spread germs up and down so what you are seeing is quite common. When I went to pick nursey form there was a big sign that foot and mouth is here

Don't bother with different remedies.... viral infection clears on their own. Capol occasionally is fine

Thanks a lot.

Hello everyone,

Thought to share this. Especially if you've been paying £50 per child per month for school meals.

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/free-school-meals-guidance-for-schools-and-local-authorities/providing-free-school-meals-to-families-with-no-recourse-to-public-funds-nrpf

MimiBen:


Thank you so much
Please where can I search for the customer support roles and other jobs?

@MimiBen Asides indeed, cvlibrary and the likes, you can target companies that offer remote customer support roles like webhelp, anywhereworks.com, NHS professionals, recruitco (formally cordant), HGS uk (they do lots of NHS campaigns). Even some banks (HSBC, Lloyds, santander etc) offer remote customer support roles.

Hi, just seen this. If you are still searching end, you can send me your details via my email. I can refer you in my current company though I'm resigning on Friday for a better offer but I can refer you if I get your details before my last day at work. The company will contact you for the CS roles available as they are constantly hiring.

MimiBen:


Thank you so much
Please where can I search for the customer support roles and other jobs?

Stevepop:

So good to read your experience, at least I know we are not alone. We've been giving her fruits but just occasionally. Guess we have to be deliberate about it. Thanks once again.

Olbas oil works as well. Buy at boots and put on baby's beddings or clothes. It helps relieve breathing and helps get rid of cattarh easilu

Ahappygirl:
Hi, just seen this. If you are still searching end, you can send me your details via my email. I can refer you in my current company though I'm resigning on Friday for a better offer but I can refer you if I get your details before my last day at work. The company will contact you for the CS roles available as they are constantly hiring.

Hi Ahappygirl,
Please I am also interested, I have tried sending you a DM. Please assist. Thank you.

I resigned from the company on Friday, just saw your mail today, so may not be able to refer. Company name is Teleperformance. You can go to their website and apply for roles that are open, they're always hiring.

ihutuluv:


Hi Ahappygirl,
Please I am also interested, I have tried sending you a DM. Please assist. Thank you.