Wawelexy:
1. I won't judge this man yet, I mean who doesn't care about the well being of his biological children, was he like that from onset?

2. Who knows maybe the man discovered the hidden secrete... Talk to your mom very well, she might knows the cause of her husband behaviour but hide it from you and plays the victim card, women are pro in this....

Just saying, might be wrong

Aduke23:

Pls, don't insult him... He's still my father. I don't just like his nonchalant behavior

Kobojunkie:
1. Many people don't! That is why there are millions of homeless children who roam the streets of your Nigeria every day. So, wake up!

2. Even if he discovered something of the sort, he cannot simply disconnect as there is a process to dealing with such things. You don't just abandon kids you were previously responsible for.

Wawelexy:
You are saying this out of mere emotions... I pray you don't witness the pain of discovering that the children you have spent so much on, are actually not yours. Some men that re psychologically weak go to the extent of killing such kids, sir, the pain is out of this world. .

But nonetheless, I'm not justifying his actions....

Kobojunkie:
What does it matter what the reasons are though? He has a family which he is meant to be responsible for but refused to. Or do you think it is OK to refuse to care for kids who are under your care just because you think they are not yours or something?

Kobojunkie:
You accuse me of speaking from mere emotions yet what you offer there in bold an emotion-driven response to betrayal?

Look, the children in even such cases are victims and as such do not deserve to be treated as if criminals. There is absolutely no rational reason why a ward should up and abandon victims without at least taking time to explain why he/she has to leave.

Nicepoker:
Look for him. Just the two of you, ask him what exactly is wrong and why his nonchalant behavior. He will open a lot to you. From there you will know what to do.

Wawelexy:
Have you ask yourself

1. What if the woman still denies even after being caught red-handed? What if she feels no remorse for what she did? The man might even be helping those kids by not creating a scene so they don't get affected psychologically, but might be fair enough to himself by not taking responsibilities for their care...

I have seen such scenerio reason why I'm being diplomatic on this....

Aduke23:

Yes
Height ( they are so tall in their family which is not in my mum's), he's dark, I'm. Even with other features which people have commented on severally

Kobojunkie:
Una dey like to weave irrational fantastical fantasies for head too much! No amount of what-ifs can make abandonment a rational enough response, none.

What you continue to describe is a problem between two adults. OP is one of the children in this case and does not deserve to be made to feel as though she committed some sort of crime.

That you have seen such a scenario play out in such a way that the children were made to believe they were responsible does not make it right at all.

prof0fficial111:
Now logic aside...
let's review your point 2.
Love is not to be reciprocated, any human deserves love. That's why Jesus teaches us in the Bible thus:

Mathew 5:44

Wawelexy:
So, in all SINCERITY, what would you have done if you were in the husband's shoe, let's say the story turn out to be a paternity fraud issues...?

Kobojunkie:
Why should a child have to sit a parent down to ask such questions?

Kobojunkie:
This man's decision to move out was not made on a whim so he has had time to consider his actions towards his children for a while --- many years--- yet in the end he continued to act irrationally -- allowing his emotions do the driving. There is no excuse for abandonment,none whatsoever!

If na paternity case, he can take it to court and at least made his case against continued responsibility for the kids there, a legal divorce of sorts. What he has done here Is abandon his responsibility and that is a crime..

https://www.nairaland.com/7492801/abandon-spouse-go-jail-three

Wawelexy:
This is Africa... You made a point but you craftily dodge the question, but it's fine... I hope OP finds help ..

Aduke23:
I shouldn't say this but my dad doesn't care. He doesn't give a hoot about us. My mum, despite the little she has, she shoulders 99% of the responsibility at home. This is not something told by my mum, but something we the children witness with our own eyes. In the course of fulfilling this responsibility, it has drained her shop.
My dad, at times when he has money he hides it in hidden parts of his wallets which my mum sees ( although she doesn't take form the money).
My dad just doesn't give a hoot. Whenever we're sick, my dad doesn't even ask how we're feeling let alone taking care of us, and when he's sick, he acts like baby wanting attention which we reluctantly give for the sake of God coz in all sincerity, he doesn't deserve it.
Whenever I'm at sch, I can call my dad for weeks and he would be comfortable not picking, ignoring my calls. He has never for once call me to check up on me at sch except once in a while when he has something to ask.
I'm fed up of his nonchalant ways.
So, him and my mum had little argue today, and he decided to leave home, because my mum rented our apartment ( a room self) my mum has been pushed to wall and she had to just speak her mind today, and he decided to leave.
I didn't make any attempt to stop him because I'm pained.
Everyone, have I done something wrong by not stopping him?

Kobojunkie:
1. Many people don't! That is why there are millions of homeless children who roam the streets of your Nigeria every day. So, wake up!

2. Even if he discovered something of the sort, he cannot simply disconnect as there is a process to dealing with such things. You don't just abandon kids you were previously responsible for.

Wawelexy:


You are saying this out of mere emotions... I pray you don't witness the pain of discovering that the children you have spent so much on, are actually not yours. Some men that re psychologically weak go to the extent of killing such kids, sir, the pain is out of this world. .

But nonetheless, I'm not justifying his actions....

Aduke23:
I shouldn't say this but my dad doesn't care. He doesn't give a hoot about us. My mum, despite the little she has, she shoulders 99% of the responsibility at home. This is not something told by my mum, but something we the children witness with our own eyes. In the course of fulfilling this responsibility, it has drained her shop.
My dad, at times when he has money he hides it in hidden parts of his wallets which my mum sees ( although she doesn't take form the money).
My dad just doesn't give a hoot. Whenever we're sick, my dad doesn't even ask how we're feeling let alone taking care of us, and when he's sick, he acts like baby wanting attention which we reluctantly give for the sake of God coz in all sincerity, he doesn't deserve it.
Whenever I'm at sch, I can call my dad for weeks and he would be comfortable not picking, ignoring my calls. He has never for once call me to check up on me at sch except once in a while when he has something to ask.
I'm fed up of his nonchalant ways.
So, him and my mum had little argue today, and he decided to leave home, because my mum rented our apartment ( a room self) my mum has been pushed to wall and she had to just speak her mind today, and he decided to leave.
I didn't make any attempt to stop him because I'm pained.
Everyone, have I done something wrong by not stopping him?

Aduke23:
Funny enough, I discovered he's here again

Aduke23:

Oga, if someone has made you fathered another man's child, doesn't mean all women are the same. I'm talking about someone who gives no hoot here and you're twisting it. Abeg, rest jare. Which yeye thing him discover?
He even get time to discover all that one. Mitchewww

zeuss:
You did the ryt thing....the man is evil

Kobojunkie:
He is back again? Look, your mother should cut the cord and free you kids from the emotional anguish that is your current existence. Not only does she deserve better as an individual in life, her kids also deserve better as far as parenting example is concerned. What she is currently teaching them is that even when they are rejected in a relationship, they are to blame and that is a horrible lesson to teach anyone, let alone, one's own kids. Making you beg and plead with your father when he hurt you is wrong. Parents need to be responsible for their own share of the blame— they are not gods and they too make mistakes and should apologize when they do.

Wawelexy:


Lol ... Small pikin dey worry this one.... Has he been liked that from onset? Anyways, na you get your family, so na you know where shoe dey pepper you for leg.... Enjoy

Aduke23:
Once jokingly advised her to remarry, but she said all men are the same

Kobojunkie:
Well, that statement has been going around from before her ancestors considered having her, but that didn't stop her from marrying your father then, so why should it stop her now from remarrying?

Aduke23:

You no get point oga. Not taking sides with my mum, but I'm no kid. I'm 23 approaching 24. He knows my mum is a prize to him. He's just doesn't deserve my mum. In fact, I've been resisting the urge to ask my mum why she ended up with him.

olasaad:
Please don't abandoned him. You can call him to check on him after 2 or 3 days. He may even have something bothering him and now that you his family have rejected him, he may died of depression or even commit suicide. Please if throughly he is your daddy don't abandoned him.

olasaad:


Please don't abandoned him. You can call him to check on him after 2 or 3 days. He may even have something bothering him and now that you his family have rejected him, he may died of depression or even commit suicide. Please if throughly he is your daddy don't abandoned him.

Aduke23:

Once jokingly advised her to remarry, but she said all men are the same

Aduke23:
As time passes, Women get tired of a d**k. They will want to explore as they cannot be eating just Egusi soup all the days of their lives. They wanna have at least a taste of varieties. They are not wired to stick to a d**k coz yt get bored as time passes. It's not their faults. That's nature's manifestations