The collapse of the family structure in society will always predate the collapse of a society. This is usually one of the signs to look out for. In communities where the family structure has completely broken down, society deteriorates with it.

You can't fix this one with a swoosh of a magic wand.(donotcopy) This is because this problem is a oroborosian one. The breakdown of the family structure exacerbates the breakdown of society which in turn causes the family structure to breakdown even faster.

In Nigeria here, with the introduction of celebrity culture and the internet going into full swing at some point in the mid 2000s, it only served to worsen and spread(donotcopy) one of the worst tendencies that we have...the worship of money.

Throw Instagram in several years later and a corner has been turned. The first victims of this were unfortunately young people. The ladies in particular who were bombarded with images (usually enhanced or fake) of an unattainable life led by the 1%. They soon imbibed it and made it their standard.

Instagram celebrities like Linda Ikeji also added fuel to the fire. If he doesn't earn in dollars or in 6 figures, dump him. If he doesn't have a car, he's not your class(donotcopy). If he doesn't this, if he doesn't that etc. Soon the young men will fall victim and would now look to attain these standards set by Instagram celebrities and enforced by women. This is on top of the already bogus culture of bride price that extorts men.

If that wasn't bad enough, even people who were already married would choose to impose these standards on their long time spouses, both male and female.(donotcopy) Marriage is no longer about teamwork, it's now about getting one's way. If you don't have your way or you're not happy, DIVORCE!!!

With the hunt for money in full swing and a new phenomenon of divorce rapidly tearing through marriages, there's a whole generation of kids that do not know the comfort and stability of a 2-parent home. The single parents are too tired from working that they simply do not have the energy to parent their kids.

With poor leadership, ever disappearing jobs, zero opportunities etc.(donotcopy) There's only one way to reach these standards. Crime!

In many communities the glorification of crime, discouragement and suspicion of education, absenteeism of fathers (and mothers too), fewer opportunities, impoverished neighbourhoods etc. has become the norm(donotcopy).

Yahoo boys (internet fraudsters), 419-ers (local fraudsters), kidnappers, armed robbers, violent cultists, drug-dealers, ritualists, organ harvesters etc. have become role models for children whose parents have all but abdicated their responsibility.

Without the family structure to act as a buffer between these impressionable young minds and the cancer of societal vices, the hope of any future family structure for future generations tanks even further.

Because of the above, all of these things are factors that lead to a sort of trap that is very difficult to break free of because the young ones are, to all intents and purposes, born into it and will probably never escape it.

atheistandproud:
If that wasn't bad enough, even people who were already married would choose to impose these standards on their long time spouses, both male and female.(donotcopy) Marriage is no longer about teamwork, it's now about getting one's way. If you don't have your way or you're not happy, DIVORCE!!!

With the hunt for money in full swing and a new phenomenon of divorce rapidly tearing through marriages, there's a whole generation of kids that do not know the comfort and stability of a 2-parent home. The single parents are too tired from working that they simply do not have the energy to parent their kids....

Wait a second.... Why does it seem as though the OP assumes family is defined by marriage, and divorce an enemy?

Kobojunkie:
Wait a second.... Why does it seem as though the OP assumes family is defined by marriage, and divorce an enemy?

I am only responsible for what I say, not what you interprete/understand.

If that's what you got, then I have no energy to correct you.

You're right. Cheers.

atheistandproud:
I am only responsible for what I say, not what you interprete/understand. If that's what you got, then I have no energy to correct you.

You're right. Cheers.

My intentions, made clear by the fact that I chose there to ask a question, is to understand your argument as it seems your major belief is that a family is a marriage and when divorce happens, the family itself collapses, posing a risk to society itself? Is this correct?

Kobojunkie:
My intentions, made clear by the fact that I choose there to ask a question, is to understand your argument as it seems your major belief is that a family is a marriage and when divorce happens, the family itself collapses, posing a risk to society itself? Is this correct?

I avoided replying you because you plucked something nonexistent out of thin air and presented it as though it was what I said (strawman). A very common argumentative tactic used on Nairaland.

No where did I state that a family is a marriage. Even a child in elementary school could easily make that simple distinction.

A family is a unit made up of two parents and kids. All academic and medical studies on the subject shows that children do best in a two parent home.

Whatever agreement that both parents have as regards their union is up to them. Whether it's a legal arrangement or an informal partnership. That is up to them.

When that union is split and one parent is left raising the kids, children tend to perform and turn out worse than those in 2 parent homes. Hence the use of the term "divorce".

Divorce is only one of the several reasons stated in the entire article. The others which includes:

1. Glorification of money
2. Setting of unattainable standards by socalled celebrity relationship coaches.
3. Such standards gladly enforced by women

All of which militate against the formation of new families.

4. Breaking down of preexisting families
5. Poor parenting of kids
6. Poor role models for kids

Children growing up under such conditions do very poorly and make up the nucleus of the next generation of the society.

Thus as a result society collapses.

atheistandproud:
The collapse of the family structure in society will always predate the collapse of a society. This is usually one of the signs to look out for. In communities where the family structure has completely broken down, society deteriorates with it.

You can't fix this one with a swoosh of a magic wand.(donotcopy) This is because this problem is a oroborosian one. The breakdown of the family structure exacerbates the breakdown of society which in turn causes the family structure to breakdown even faster.

In Nigeria here, with the introduction of celebrity culture and the internet going into full swing at some point in the mid 2000s, it only served to worsen and spread(donotcopy) one of the worst tendencies that we have...the worship of money.

Throw Instagram in several years later and a corner has been turned. The first victims of this were unfortunately young people. The ladies in particular who were bombarded with images (usually enhanced or fake) of an unattainable life led by the 1%. They soon imbibed it and made it their standard.

Instagram celebrities like Linda Ikeji also added fuel to the fire. If he doesn't earn in dollars or in 6 figures, dump him. If he doesn't have a car, he's not your class(donotcopy). If he doesn't this, if he doesn't that etc. Soon the young men will fall victim and would now look to attain these standards set by Instagram celebrities and enforced by women. This is on top of the already bogus culture of bride price that extorts men.

If that wasn't bad enough, even people who were already married would choose to impose these standards on their long time spouses, both male and female.(donotcopy) Marriage is no longer about teamwork, it's now about getting one's way. If you don't have your way or you're not happy, DIVORCE!!!

With the hunt for money in full swing and a new phenomenon of divorce rapidly tearing through marriages, there's a whole generation of kids that do not know the comfort and stability of a 2-parent home. The single parents are too tired from working that they simply do not have the energy to parent their kids.

With poor leadership, ever disappearing jobs, zero opportunities etc.(donotcopy) There's only one way to reach these standards. Crime!

In many communities the glorification of crime, discouragement and suspicion of education, absenteeism of fathers (and mothers too), fewer opportunities, impoverished neighbourhoods etc. has become the norm(donotcopy).

Yahoo boys (internet fraudsters), 419-ers (local fraudsters), kidnappers, armed robbers, violent cultists, drug-dealers, ritualists, organ harvesters etc. have become role models for children whose parents have all but abdicated their responsibility.

Without the family structure to act as a buffer between these impressionable young minds and the cancer of societal vices, the hope of any future family structure for future generations tanks even further.

Because of the above, all of these things are factors that lead to a sort of trap that is very difficult to break free of because the young ones are, to all intents and purposes, born into it and will probably never escape it.

Lucidly said
The sad reality

sageb:


Lucidly said
The sad reality

But nobody cares, we are gradually turning in Black America.

atheistandproud:
A. No where did I state that a family is a marriage. Even in a child in elementary school could easily make that simple distinction. A family is a unit made up two parents and kids. All academic and medical studies on the subject shows that children do best in a two parent home. Whatever agreement that both parents have as regards their union is up to them.
Whether it's a legal arrangement or an informal partnership. That is up to them. When that union is split and one parent is left raising the kids, children tend to perform and turn out worse than those in 2 parent homes. Hence the use of the term "divorce".

B. Divorce is only one of the several reasons stated in the entire article. The others which includes:
1. Glorification of money
2. Setting of unattainable standards by socalled celebrity relationship coaches.
3. Such standards gladly enforced by women

All of which militate against the formation of new families.

4. Breaking down of preexisting families
5. Poor parenting of kids
6. Poor role models for kids

C. Children growing up under such conditions do very poorly and make up the nucleus of the next generation of the society.
Thus as a result society collapses.

A. You are basically saying exactly what I said earlier. According to you, a family unit is defined by two parents — the legality of the agreement which binds or marries them is not of great importance— and their ward(s). You then continue to insist that when the relationship between the parents in the unit breaks i.e. divorce of sorts, the children turn out worse than those raised in 2-parent homes meaning the family(a 2 parent-home) is destroyed when a divorce takes place. Is this not what you are saying?

B. Well, of all the factors you claimed, divorce seems to be the only one that you carefully explained. How worship of money and the setting of what you consider "unattainable standards" contribute to the collapse of families by mitigating against the formation of families, according to you, you did a poor job of explaining.

[b]C.[/b]Where is your evidence for this?

Kobojunkie:
A. You are basically saying exactly what I said earlier. According to you, a family unit is defined by two parents — the legality of the agreement which binds or marries them is not of great importance— and their ward(s). You then continue to insist that when the relationship between the parents in the unit breaks i.e. divorce of sorts, the children turn out worse than those raised in 2-parent homes meaning the family(a 2 parent-home) is destroyed when a divorce takes place. Is this not what you are saying?

B. Well, of all the factors you claimed, divorce seems to be the only one that you carefully explained. How worship of money and the setting of what you consider "unattainable standards" contribute to the collapse of families by mitigating against the formation of families, according to you, you did a poor job of explaining.

[b]C.[/b]Where is your evidence for this?

You are too easy to read. I knew from the off that you were looking to defend single-parenthood. It takes two people to produce and raise a child. In fact, it takes an entire village to raise a child, but in the absence of that, two parents should be the minimum.

This new woke single motherhood culture that you people are looking to import and foster in Nigeria will be the death of our already struggling society.

As for anecdotal evidence, a good look at the Black American communities in the USA should do.

For academic and peer reviewed journals, see abstracts below

atheistandproud:
1. You are too easy to read. I knew from the off that you were looking to defend single-parenthood. It takes two people to produce and raise a child. In fact, it takes an entire village to raise a child, but in the absence of that, two parents should be the minimum.

2. This new woke single motherhood culture that you people are looking to import and foster in Nigeria will be the death of our already struggling society. As for anecdotal, a good look at the time Black American communities in the USA should do. For academic and peer reviewed journals, see abstracts below

1. Single-parenting does not need my defense, especially given in today's world where almost more than half of the adults you see today were likely raised in single-parent homes.

2. Import? It is already been a part of Nigerian culture since before you were even born. Many of those who you know today were themselves raised in single-parent homes, and likely. Marriage abandonment/spousal abandonment, a formerly culturally accepted practice is one of the greatest contributors to single-parenting and continues to be with the government finally declaring it criminal only this past September. So, this idea that single-parenting is something new only indicates you haven't done your homework well at all.

What you consider a single-parenting culture seems more like a push towards acceptance and a detaching of shame from existence in that stage. Since the time of our forefathers, single parents, particularly women abandoned in marriage have had to live and raise their kids in shame, leading to their raising emotionally scarred children as a result. Why you feel single parents should continue to live as your forefathers had them live— in hiding and shame— even with the number of abandonments as high as it is today is beyond me.

Kobojunkie:
1. Single-parenting does not need my defense, especially given in today's world where almost more than half of the adults you see today were likely raised in single-parent homes.

2. Import? It is already been a part of Nigerian culture since before you were even born. Many of those who you know today were themselves raised in single-parent homes, and likely. Marriage abandonment/spousal abandonment, a formerly culturally accepted practice is one of the greatest contributors to single-parenting and continues to be with the government finally declaring it criminal only this past September. So, this idea that single-parenting is something new only indicates you haven't done your homework well at all.

What you consider a single-parenting culture seems more like a push towards acceptance and a detaching of shame from existence in that stage. Since the time of our forefathers, single parents, particularly women abandoned in marriage have had to live and raise their kids in shame, leading to their raising emotionally scarred children as a result. Why you feel single parents should continue to live as your forefathers had them live— in hiding and shame— even with the number of abandonments as high as it is today is beyond me.

And you don finally bring your leg out. Single parenthood doesn't need your defense but here we are.

It is false equivalence to equate spousal abandonment of the past to the willful separation of the present. If we were go back statistics, the number of people raised in single parent before the 2000s was only a minute fraction of the society. A very tiny fraction when compared to monogamists and polygamists.

So if it was prevalent your community, I empathize with you but I cannot relate. Where I grew up and the family I came from, I can trace my linage back 6 generations and I know where my great grandfather is buried. He died in 1965. It's embossed on his tomb.

The explosion in willful single motherhood began in the 2000s and has further gone on. Young men are picking up baby mama culture and young ladies are joining the bandwagon, having multiple children from different men.

What makes it worse is that we do not even have a welfare system to look after these single parent families like they do in the USA.

Children in single parent homes turn out worse. I see it everywhere around now. Zero parental control, zero discipline, zero comportment.

These are the adults of tomorrow, but here you are defending the slide into degeneracy. Continue.

atheistandproud:
1. And you don finally bring your leg out. Single parenthood doesn't need your defense but here we are. It is false equivalence to equate spousal abandonment of the past to the willful separation of the present. If we were go back statistics, the number of people raised in single parent before the 2000s was only a minute fraction of the society. A very tiny fraction when compared to monogamists and polygamists.

I will direct you instead to threads where these issues have been previously hashed out to do some catching up.

https://www.nairaland.com/7492477/wife-does-everything-tell-then
https://www.nairaland.com/7492801/abandon-spouse-go-jail-three

Nigeria is the poverty capital of the world, even if women wanted to only marry Nigerian men for money, statistically it wouldn’t even be feasible since there’s no money in the first place. So how can ‘glorification of money’ and 'unattainable lifestyle of celebs etc' be threatening the nuclear family unit when women are getting married to poor/average men every weekend. Also, marriage is too much of a social currency in Nigeria for people to be swayed by a few celebrities.

Can men take a bit of accountability for once, which one is they ‘fall victim and would now look to attain these standards set by Instagram celebrities and enforced by women’. So it’s women’s fault that men are harvesting the organs of friends and family in a bush somewhere to get rich?

I thought some of the main causes for divorce were things like infidelity, lack of communication, infertility blah blah blah.

Kobojunkie:
Wait a second.... Why does it seem as though the OP assumes family is defined by marriage, and divorce an enemy?

Because that's exactly what it is alongside other factors the OP mentioned.
Take it or leave it.
We just have to start telling ourselves the honest truth.

atheistandproud:


I avoided replying you because you plucked something nonexistent out of thin air and presented it as though it was what I said (strawman). A very common argumentative tactic used on Nairaland.

No where did I state that a family is a marriage. Even a child in elementary school could easily make that simple distinction.

A family is a unit made up of two parents and kids. All academic and medical studies on the subject shows that children do best in a two parent home.

Whatever agreement that both parents have as regards their union is up to them. Whether it's a legal arrangement or an informal partnership. That is up to them.

When that union is split and one parent is left raising the kids, children tend to perform and turn out worse than those in 2 parent homes. Hence the use of the term "divorce".

Divorce is only one of the several reasons stated in the entire article. The others which includes:

1. Glorification of money
2. Setting of unattainable standards by socalled celebrity relationship coaches.
3. Such standards gladly enforced by women

All of which militate against the formation of new families.

4. Breaking down of preexisting families
5. Poor parenting of kids
6. Poor role models for kids

Children growing up under such conditions do very poorly and make up the nucleus of the next generation of the society.

Thus as a result society collapses.

Kudos to you OP.
This is an intellectual piece that needs to hit front page

atheistandproud:


You are too easy to read. I knew from the off that you were looking to defend single-parenthood. It takes two people to produce and raise a child. In fact, it takes an entire village to raise a child, but in the absence of that, two parents should be the minimum.

This new woke single motherhood culture that you people are looking to import and foster in Nigeria will be the death of our already struggling society.

As for anecdotal evidence, a good look at the Black American communities in the USA should do.

For academic and peer reviewed journals, see abstracts below

OP you're just so good.
I don't want to assume so let me ask are you a psychologist?

Senioreddy:
Because that's exactly what it is alongside other factors the OP mentioned.
Take it or leave it.
We just have to start telling ourselves the honest truth.

Telling yourself a truth that even your ancestors did not agree to?

Look, the nuclear family picture.... you were taught that in primary school because your minds were not ready to process the complicated things of life. There are so many other kinds of families out there including families with the single-parent home being just one example of such.

Kobojunkie:
Telling yourself a truth that even your ancestors did not agree to?

Look, the nuclear family picture.... you were taught that in primary school because your minds were not ready to process the complicated things of life. There are so many other kinds of families out there including families with the single-parent home being just one example of such.

Ok agreed we're taught that in primary schools due to the fact that our minds were not fully matured then to process the complicated things of life, have you have ever taken time to look at the adverse effect of single parenthood on our society today?
Yes there could be one or two exceptions but a larger population of the young adults who grew up in single parent homes would tell you they don't wish such for their children.

Today we even have some homes that the presence of both parents are almost non existent

Nigeria get society before?

Poverty capital of the world, underdeveloped cities, no good hospital, out of school children highest in the world, no up to standard school, so many indices that makes up a society lacking and this guy is hallucinating about good family in Nigeria.
Maybe he forgot the phrase suffering and smiling.
And of course, let's blame the woman!

Senioreddy:


OP you're just so good.
I don't want to assume so let me ask are you a psychologist?

I'm not a psychologist but I know how to to read the room. I understand how a lot of how many Nigerians argue. I also know how women also argue.

For most people, it's not about what message is being passed across. It's about how they feel. So when someone is deliberately trying to put words in your mouth, it's not that difficult to see where they're headed.

Back to the typical Nairaland style of argument, they'll pick the area of the message that touches them, twist it out of proportion and then corner the argument that way. If you allow yourself to be sucked out of your message, soon you'll find yourself trapped in an area that you didn't even write.

If the shoe does not fit, then they won't come after you.

If you notice, she kept sidestepping and conveniently ignoring all the other reasons presented as well as the evidence which she herself requested for.

When it comes to Homosexuality and Transgenderism, woke people will quote science and peered review journals stating that we have 1000+ genders. When it comes to the adverse effects of single mother homes on young children, the defenders of single motherhood will bury their heads in the sand. Pretending not to see the science or the peer reviewed journals.

The subset of single mothers that are quickly rising are also turning out to be one of the most vocal. I have a nurse friend in her late 30s/early 40s who is looking to have a child out of wedlock to raise by herself. I have another teacher acquaintance in her late 20s who never wants to get married but wants two children by the time she is 40. Both are very strong feminists as well as being highly educated. When I present the studies about single parent homes to them, they switch up on me to make me look like the bad guy. I know some stupid guy somewhere will impregnate them for free and they'll discard him.

Seeing how she switched from divorce to single motherhood gave the game away. When she began comparing spousal abandonment to deliberate babymama hood, I knew she had no intention to have a honest conversation. I clocked out. Reading the links that she sent me only served to strengthen my resolve.

My message was simple: Destroying a family, destroys our society. Many of the damaged young people below 25 were raised in families with absentee parents. Even in 2 parent homes where one or both parents are absent, the children turn out badly. I simply outlined why the family unit is breaking down and why the broken products of these marriages will go on to break their own children.

She took it and spun it around to be a witch-hunt, shaming and scapegoating of single mothers. Something which I didn't have in mind at all.

descarado:
Nigeria get society before?

Poverty capital of the world, underdeveloped cities, no good hospital, out of school children highest in the world, no up to standard school, so many indices that makes up a society lacking and this guy is hallucinating about good family in Nigeria.
Maybe he forgot the phrase suffering and smiling.
And of course, let's blame the woman!

The question is are the factors mentioned by the OP responsible for societal collapse?

What are the factors if asked to summarize the passage?
Lastly, going by these trends/factors, where and how do you see the upcoming generation from single parenthood?

Senioreddy:
1. Ok agreed we're taught that in primary schools due to the fact that our minds were not fully matured then to process the complicated things of life, have you have ever taken time to look at the adverse effect of single parenthood on our society today?

2. Yes there could be one or two exceptions but a larger population of the young adults who grew up in single parent homes would tell you they don't wish such for their children.

3. Today we even have some homes that the presence of both parents are almost non existent

1. I grew up around many who were raised in one parent homes after the other paremt decided to abscond and many of them grew up well. In fact, a good number of Nigerians, as I have come to learn, grow up in these settings because culturally these unofficial divorces are an accepted norm. So single parent homes have been with us since even the time of our ancestors.

2. We all have wishes but reality is what reality is. Single parent homes are nothing new and will continue so long as humans are humans. Folks who lived in such homes formerly lived in shame during the time of our ancestors. They are flesh and blood like you and I, so, why should they have to live in shame because they were abandoned along the way?

3. Again, single parent homes where a norm even back in the 80s..

atheistandproud:


This new woke single motherhood culture that you people are looking to import and foster in Nigeria will be the death of our already struggling society.

As for anecdotal evidence, a good look at the Black American communities in the USA should do.
For academic and peer reviewed journals, see abstracts below

You are listing what you believe is a problem but you are not listing solutions..

As for me personally, I'm interpreting your post as call to conservatism as against modern liberalism which is a bit weird coming from an atheist who is by default supposed to be liberal by experience.

Your post can even be construed as an attack on gay people seeing as they don't conform to the "traditional marriage setting". Am I right in these my conclusion of your post's?

Again I ask you to present a solution to the perceived problem you've diagnosed.

Donjazet2:


You are listing what you believe is a problem but you are not listing solutions..

As for me personally, I'm interpreting your post as call to conservatism as against modern liberalism which is a bit weird coming from an atheist who is by default supposed to be liberal by experience.

Your post can even be construed as an attack on gay people seeing as they don't conform to the "traditional marriage setting". Am I right in these my conclusion of your post's?

Again I ask you to present a solution to the perceived problem you've diagnosed.

I am only responsible for what I say, not what you understand.

I'm clearly not interested in debating points that are out of the scope of my post.

So whatever you say, you're right. Anyhow you choose to construe it. Cheers.

atheistandproud:


I am only responsible for what I say, not what you understand.

I'm clearly not interested in debating points that are out of the scope of my post.

So whatever you say, you're right. Anyhow you choose to construe it. Cheers.

I'm very sad hearing this response from you. Check my past post, I was the one advising you to shun critics of your videos and only take the constructive ones.
I personally watch most of your videos because you seem quite knowledgeable but clearly you have a very thin skin..

I read your post and analysed it, I wasn't rude or combative in my response to you and even told you I might be wrong in my interpretation.

Rather than correct me where you thought I was wrong, you are replying me very rudely?

Do you think that's how healthy conversations are held?
Or else you didn't want to converse but just make a point whether you are right or wrong.
We learn everyday. You may be onto something but your post wasn't as expressive enough as you think.
Quite sad, nigga.

Donjazet2:


I'm very sad hearing this response from you. Check my past post, I was the one advising you to shun critics of your videos and only take the constructive ones.
I personally watch most of your videos because you seem quite knowledgeable but clearly you have a very thin skin..

I read your post and analysed it, I wasn't rude or combative in my response to you and even told you I might be wrong in my interpretation.

Rather than correct me where you thought I was wrong, you are replying me very rudely?

Do you think that's how healthy conversations are held?
Or else you didn't want to converse but just make a point whether you are right or wrong.
We learn everyday. You may be onto something but your post wasn't as expressive enough as you think.
Quite sad, nigga.

1. I was not rude. Not even in the slightest. Please reread my reply. I am only responsible for what I say, not what anyone else understands. It's not about thin skin. It's about picking my fights correctly.

2. This writeup is obviously for a Nigerian audience and has nothing to do with Western world. As soon as you insinuated that I was attacking Gay families, I switched off and left the conversation. If that was what you construed. Then it's okay.

How you saw rudeness in that is quite clearly beyond me.

But as a student of debate, I understand what loaded and trapdoor questions are and make it a point of duty to clearly avoid them.

Now where did I attack gay couples. I said 1 and 2 parent families. That's what I said. A gay couple has two individuals to raise a child and such a child would experience stability because the work load for gathering resources and parenting the child would be shared. Many hands make light the load.

Where should I start defending or explaining something that's not even part of what I wrote. On top of that you're now calling me rude.
Na wa

I understand that not everyone will agree with me and that's okay but I will not expend energy tackling fires that I did not light up.

atheistandproud:


1. I was not rude. Not even in the slightest. Please reread my reply. I am only responsible for what I say, not what anyone else understands. It's not about thin skin. It's about picking my fights correctly.

2. This writeup is obviously for a Nigerian audience and has nothing to do with Western world. As soon as you insinuated that I was attacking Gay families, I switched off and left the conversation. If that was what you construed. Then it's okay.

How you saw rudeness in that is quite clearly beyond me.

But as a student of debate, I understand what loaded and trapdoor questions are and make it a point of duty to clearly avoid them.

Now where did I attack gay couples. I said 1 and 2 parent families. That's what I said. A gay couple has two individuals to raise a child and such a child would experience stability because the work load for gathering resources and parenting the child would be shared. Many hands make light the load.

Where should I start defending or explaining something that's not even part of what I wrote. On top of that you're now calling me rude.
Na wa

But I'm not "fighting" with you. The fact t that you will see it as that means you are already 8n combative mode waiting for an attack of which I did no such thing.

I'm actually engaging you because I value what you have to say.

Now when you talk about, "traditional family structure". It's assumed that you are talking about the father, mother and children set up. If you mean more, then perhaps you elucidate further. Because when we talk about that kind of structure, modern family units which include two fathers and kids or 2 mother's and kids are not thought of.

And more so, single parenthood is better than a toxic partnership within the "family structure". Don't you think?

You are saying that these days, internet culture sets a wrong standard for couples but I'm praying you're not pushing the blame to one side.
As I said earlier, your initial post is not expressive enough. Unless you are not interested in explaining your points perfectly that's okay. But this is public forum upon which you made a take so...

Donjazet2:
You are listing what you believe is a problem but you are not listing solutions..

As for me personally, I'm interpreting your post as call to conservatism as against modern liberalism which is a bit weird coming from an atheist who is by default supposed to be liberal by experience.Your post can even be construed as an attack on gay people seeing as they don't conform to the "traditional marriage setting". Am I right in these my conclusion of your post's?

Again I ask you to present a solution to the perceived problem you've diagnosed.

I didn't even consider his moniker as having real meaning to it.

Seen and ignored.

Ad hominem is the refuge of the intellectually stunted.

atheistandproud:


I am only responsible for what I say, not what you interprete/understand.

If that's what you got, then I have no energy to correct you.

You're right. Cheers.

Perfect reply for...

atheistandproud:
The collapse of the family structure in society will always predate the collapse of a society. This is usually one of the signs to look out for. In communities where the family structure has completely broken down, society deteriorates with it.

You can't fix this one with a swoosh of a magic wand.(donotcopy) This is because this problem is a oroborosian one. The breakdown of the family structure exacerbates the breakdown of society which in turn causes the family structure to breakdown even faster.

In Nigeria here, with the introduction of celebrity culture and the internet going into full swing at some point in the mid 2000s, it only served to worsen and spread(donotcopy) one of the worst tendencies that we have...the worship of money.

Throw Instagram in several years later and a corner has been turned. The first victims of this were unfortunately young people. The ladies in particular who were bombarded with images (usually enhanced or fake) of an unattainable life led by the 1%. They soon imbibed it and made it their standard.

Instagram celebrities like Linda Ikeji also added fuel to the fire. If he doesn't earn in dollars or in 6 figures, dump him. If he doesn't have a car, he's not your class(donotcopy). If he doesn't this, if he doesn't that etc. Soon the young men will fall victim and would now look to attain these standards set by Instagram celebrities and enforced by women. This is on top of the already bogus culture of bride price that extorts men.

If that wasn't bad enough, even people who were already married would choose to impose these standards on their long time spouses, both male and female.(donotcopy) Marriage is no longer about teamwork, it's now about getting one's way. If you don't have your way or you're not happy, DIVORCE!!!

With the hunt for money in full swing and a new phenomenon of divorce rapidly tearing through marriages, there's a whole generation of kids that do not know the comfort and stability of a 2-parent home. The single parents are too tired from working that they simply do not have the energy to parent their kids.

With poor leadership, ever disappearing jobs, zero opportunities etc.(donotcopy) There's only one way to reach these standards. Crime!

In many communities the glorification of crime, discouragement and suspicion of education, absenteeism of fathers (and mothers too), fewer opportunities, impoverished neighbourhoods etc. has become the norm(donotcopy).

Yahoo boys (internet fraudsters), 419-ers (local fraudsters), kidnappers, armed robbers, violent cultists, drug-dealers, ritualists, organ harvesters etc. have become role models for children whose parents have all but abdicated their responsibility.

Without the family structure to act as a buffer between these impressionable young minds and the cancer of societal vices, the hope of any future family structure for future generations tanks even further.

Because of the above, all of these things are factors that lead to a sort of trap that is very difficult to break free of because the young ones are, to all intents and purposes, born into it and will probably never escape it.

Nice write up!
indeed family (2-parent system) is the nucleus of the society

gly:


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You sef see am too bah.

Life no hard.