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My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me - Family - Nairaland

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My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 1:19pm On Jan 23, 2023
We had a lot issues in the past we separated and later reconciled but every slightl mistake she will remind me about what I have done to her and our daughter she has said that when our daughter grows up she will tells her everything. I am not happy with her anymore because I have apologised to her from the bottom of my heart and I expected us to start afresh again but she is still dwelling in the past and I don't know how to make her forget about the past so we can enjoy our marriage. What should I do to change her mind so she will be in love me again and stop seeing me as a monster that caused her so much pain in the past?

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by thesicilian: 1:25pm On Jan 23, 2023
She probably enjoys seeing you in this miserable state of grovelling for affection. The only advice I can give is for you to stop apologizing. Be a man, take care of yourself and your family in the best possible way you can

12 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by superCleanworks(m): 1:43pm On Jan 23, 2023
Handsomejok:

I expected us to start afresh again but she is still dwelling in the past and I don't know how to make her forget about the past so we can enjoy our marriage. What should I do to change her mind so she will be in love me again and stop seeing me as a monster that caused her so much pain in the past?

this is the ENTITLEMENT problem with CALCULATIVELY OFFENSIVE humans. they just walk back into your life with their dirty feet and START HAVING EXPECTATIONS about how you should become BRAIN-DEAD and automatically forget the bullshit they did to you in the first place. And if you just can not easily forget it, you have become a demon.

Minus your wife. Not everyone forgets easily and forgiveness is not cheap if at all it is available.

What makes you think you are entitled to her forgiveness? do you even deserve what you are asking for?

34 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Richy4(m): 2:18pm On Jan 23, 2023
Maybe You should google guilt trip in a relationship and see if you can find what experts said about it and how to manage it in a relationship...She is guilt tripping you using the past to get her way....and it's not healthy..

1 Like

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by yrhuhfy113: 2:58pm On Jan 23, 2023
Handsomejok:
We had a lot issues in the past we separated and later reconciled but every slightl mistake she will remind me about what I have done to her and our daughter she has said that when our daughter grows up she will tells her everything. I am not happy with her anymore because I have apologised to her from the bottom of my heart and I expected us to start afresh again but she is still dwelling in the past and I don't know how to make her forget about the past so we can enjoy our marriage. What should I do to change her mind so she will be in love me again and stop seeing me as a monster that caused her so much pain in the past?

YOU DON'T NEED HER FORGIVENESS AS LONG AS YOU HER GENIUNELY SORRY, START ACTING BETTER, DOING BETTER FOR HER AND YOUR DAUGHTER, START TAKING RESPONSIBILITY AND BE ACCOUNTABLE...... DON'T APPOLOGIZE ANYMORE, JUST BE THE CHANGED PERSON YOU PROMISED YOU WILL BE...... AND BE HAPPY WITH THAT.... IT MAY TAKE MONTHS, BUT SHE WILL LOVE YOU AGAIN

9 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 3:17pm On Jan 23, 2023
thesicilian:
She probably enjoys seeing you in this miserable state of grovelling for affection. The only advice I can give is for you to stop apologizing. Be a man, take care of yourself and your family in the best possible way you can


Thanks
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 3:18pm On Jan 23, 2023
superCleanworks:


this is the ENTITLEMENT problem with CALCULATIVELY OFFENSIVE humans. they just walk back into your life with their dirty feet and START HAVING EXPECTATIONS about how you should become BRAINDEAD and automatically forget the bullshit they did to you in the first place. And if you just can not easily forget it, you have become a demon.

Minus your wife. Not everyone forgets easily and forgiveness is not cheap if at all it is available.

What makes you think you are entitled to her forgiveness? do you evendeserve what you are asking for?


If I am not entitled to her forgiveness but why did she accept to come back to me?

4 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 3:19pm On Jan 23, 2023
Richy4:
Maybe You should google guilt trip in a relationship and see if you can find what experts said about it and how to manage it in a relationship...She is guilt tripping you using the past to get her way....and it's not healthy..


Thanks

1 Like

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 3:22pm On Jan 23, 2023
yrhuhfy113:


YOU DON'T NEED HER FORGIVENESS AS LONG AS YOU HER GENIUNELY SORRY, START ACTING BETTER, DOING BETTER FOR HER AND YOUR DAUGHTER, START TAKING RESPONSIBILITY AND BE ACCOUNTABLE...... DON'T APPOLOGIZE ANYMORE, JUST BE THE CHANGED PERSON YOU PROMISED YOU WILL BE...... AND BE HAPPY WITH THAT.... IT MAY TAKE MONTHS, BUT SHE WILL LOVE YOU AGAIN


Thanks it is nearly 2 years since we reconciled
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by onumadu: 4:03pm On Jan 23, 2023
Handsomejok:
We had a lot issues in the past we separated and later reconciled but every slightl mistake she will remind me about what I have done to her and our daughter she has said that when our daughter grows up she will tells her everything. I am not happy with her anymore because I have apologised to her from the bottom of my heart and I expected us to start afresh again but she is still dwelling in the past and I don't know how to make her forget about the past so we can enjoy our marriage. What should I do to change her mind so she will be in love me again and stop seeing me as a monster that caused her so much pain in the past?

This marriage is damaged beyond repair, unless you are prepared to pay in your old age.
Emotion and sentiment has nothing to do with it.
If I were you, I would start marking SERIOUS plans to replace the woman. Start all over with another woman if you must.
Get yourself together, and move on.
Unforgiveness is a deadly sin; but a lot of women do it.
It is their nature.

4 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by superCleanworks(m): 4:04pm On Jan 23, 2023
Handsomejok:


If I am not entitled to her forgiveness but why did she accept to come back to me?

So you feel entitled? I was right. You are so full of yourself, low wisdom.

That I choose to sit on the same table with you AFTER YOU STAB ME does not mean you are entitled to my forgiveness.

A) for me, it might mean I am luring you to your PAYBACK.
B) for her, it might mean she is IN THE PROCESS of healing.

none of these two options is good to rush.

9 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Kobojunkie: 4:16pm On Jan 23, 2023
Handsomejok:
If I am not entitled to her forgiveness but why did she accept to come back to me?
Forgiveness is not an on and off switch. Trust is not earned overnight. Once broken, it could take many years to re-earn it. So instead of seeking pity, you ought instead to be paying close attention to the areas of your life that need improving. undecided

4 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Oluneutral: 4:41pm On Jan 23, 2023
https://www.nairaland.com/5705389/think-wife-witch



https://www.nairaland.com/6787206/1-years-old-witch

Were you not the one that opened the above threads?
You accused your wife of witchcraft and behind every ills that befell you. As if that was not enough, you also accused your daughter of 1+ of witchcraft and that both of them have connived and conspired to finish you financially, emotionally and even health-wise. So you ridiculously and embarrassingly sent them out. Causing them a lot of trauma and emotional torture. Insults and embarrassment from your far and near folks. After a year, you came back to your senses and apologized, she accepted to come back. Do you think those embarrassing moments she and her daughter suffered could be erased in a jiffy? Do you think accusing someone of witchcraft is something that can be easily forgiven? What if you're in a barbaric environment and she had been stoned to death when you accused her and her daughter of witchcraft, would you still be entitled to her forgiveness? What if she had committed suicide for not being able to stand the false accusations, would you still be saying this?
You're delusional, yes, you are.

May God heal your wife and daughter of those trauma and torture you caused them to suffer.

As for you, I really don't know the advice to give you but I pray not to have someone like you around me.

15 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 5:02pm On Jan 23, 2023
Oluneutral:
https://www.nairaland.com/5705389/think-wife-witch



https://www.nairaland.com/6787206/1-years-old-witch

Were you not the one that opened the above threads?
You accused your wife of witchcraft and behind every ills that befell you. As if that was not enough, you also accused your daughter of 1+ of witchcraft and that both of them have connived and conspired to finish you financially, emotionally and even health-wise. So you ridiculously and embarrassingly sent them out. Causing them a lot of trauma and emotional torture. Insults and embarrassment from your far and near folks. After a year, you came back to your senses and apologized, she accepted to come back. Do you think those embarrassing moments she and her daughter suffered could be erased in a jiffy? Do you think accusing someone of witchcraft is something that can be easily forgiven? What if you're in a barbaric environment and she had been stoned to death when you accused her and her daughter of witchcraft, would you still be entitled to her forgiveness? What if she had committed suicide for not being able to stand the false accusations, would you still be saying this?
You're delusional, yes, you are.

May God heal your wife and daughter of those trauma and torture you caused them to suffer.

As for you, I really don't know the advice to give you but I pray not to have someone like you around me.


I am a victim of fake pastors
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 5:04pm On Jan 23, 2023
superCleanworks:


So you feel entitled? I was right. You are so full of yourself, low wisdom.

That I choose to sit on the same table with you AFTER YOU STAB ME does not mean you are entitled to my forgiveness.

A) for me, it might mean I am luring you to your PAYBACK.
B) for her, it might mean she is IN THE PROCESS of healing.

none of these two options is good to rush.


Maybe she is also luring me to my payback
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Mindlog: 5:12pm On Jan 23, 2023
onumadu:


This marriage is damaged beyond repair, unless you are prepared to pay in your old age.
Emotion and sentiment has nothing to do with it.
If I were you, I would start marking SERIOUS plans to replace the woman. Start all over with another woman if you must.
Get yourself together, and move on.
Unforgiveness is a deadly sin; but a lot of women do it.
It is their nature.

Serious plans to replace the woman does not resolve issues. When he has deep rooted issues with the new wife, I guess you will suggest he goes on a replacement spree/

Emotions has everything to do with it.

Accusing your wife and your own daughter of being witches, had them humiliated and thrown out of their home with the support of those close to you, is certainly not flimsy.

Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa, Mea Maxima Culpa has no time frame,

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Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by jasent(m): 5:16pm On Jan 23, 2023
Handsomejok:



If I am not entitled to her forgiveness but why did she accept to come back to me?
Good question. But can you tell us what you did to her?

1 Like

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by seyigiggle: 5:44pm On Jan 23, 2023
whatever hurts you is what people would use to joke at you.

instead of hurting, turn it to joke.
don't be too serious
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Nobody: 5:47pm On Jan 23, 2023
.

5 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by nautybride: 5:58pm On Jan 23, 2023
When Heart broken, it takes time to heal. Help your wife in the healing process by loving her the more. Mend your broken trust.
If truly you are still interested in this marriage, treat them right.
Don't you know it's easier to destroy than build?

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Klass99(f): 6:02pm On Jan 23, 2023
😝

5 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by jesmond3945: 6:23pm On Jan 23, 2023
Handsomejok:
We had a lot issues in the past we separated and later reconciled but every slightl mistake she will remind me about what I have done to her and our daughter she has said that when our daughter grows up she will tells her everything. I am not happy with her anymore because I have apologised to her from the bottom of my heart and I expected us to start afresh again but she is still dwelling in the past and I don't know how to make her forget about the past so we can enjoy our marriage. What should I do to change her mind so she will be in love me again and stop seeing me as a monster that caused her so much pain in the past?
what did you do to her? If you cheated is hard
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by jesmond3945: 6:27pm On Jan 23, 2023
Handsomejok:



I am a victim of fake pastors
chai sorry brother. Your wife is just tolerating you. The love she has for you is dead.

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by nicerod(m): 6:29pm On Jan 23, 2023
Marriage matter I no dey o

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 6:34pm On Jan 23, 2023
Klass99:


This made me laugh and I thought to myself, a whole logical gender person! Meaning no offence though I'm just thinking out loud.

With the things I'm reading about what you did to your wife and daughter, you really need to give her time. Agreeing to a reconciliation and returning to you was a giant step to begin with, not every woman would have taken you back.

Quit trying to make her forget, that is humanly impossible. She may be able to forgive you but to forget! Ahn ahn na, can you yourself forget what you did? Human memory is a very powerful thing o.


I know forgiving doesn't mean forgetting but she should stop reminding me about what I have done to her and daughter because it is not helping our relationship
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Houseofglam7(f): 6:35pm On Jan 23, 2023
You are a toxic human being…I sincerely hoped she didn’t return.
Tagging a 1 year old innocent child a witch is witchcraft in itself.
Worse still, you have the I.Q of a gnat.
GTFOH

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Klass99(f): 7:09pm On Jan 23, 2023
😝

1 Like

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 7:12pm On Jan 23, 2023
Klass99:


This is doable and not impossible. But you sef what on earth possesed you to believe the witchcraft stories?

I browsed through one of your previous threads and I couldn't stop laughing when you said your daughter was commissioned by her mother to finish the work of killing you.

You see ehn, your situation is one of the reasons I don't tolerate people with a mindset of, the spiritual controls the physical. Every little thing with a logical explanation to it, usually means something spiritual to them and it is never good in their point of view.

The spiritual for them is always of a demonic nature, they never think in terms of the spiritual being God's good spirit or His angels.


But you sef what on earth possesed you to believe the witchcraft stories?

My mother
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Klass99(f): 7:15pm On Jan 23, 2023
.

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Handsomejok: 7:20pm On Jan 23, 2023
Klass99:


Lol, kpele o. But I thought you said it was the fake pastors, now it is your mother?


But I thought you said it was the fake pastors, now it is your mother?


You asked me what made me to believe witchcraft stories I said my mother because she introduced me to those fake pastors and I believed all their lies because I trusted my mother
Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Klass99(f): 7:23pm On Jan 23, 2023
.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Hasn't Forgiven Me by Sapiosexuality(m): 9:02pm On Jan 23, 2023
These criminals called pastors have destroyed many homes that I think the government should get involve.

Someone very close to me today can no longer see because one of these fools told him a health problem was actually spiritual.

The foundation of one's mind has a lot to do here. If your mind has been tempered by wrong religious teachings it will be easy for your mind to plant, harvest and eat the garbage these madmen vormit.

You really think if they want you dead you stand a chance. As an average Nigerian, anybody that wants you dead can kill you. They don't even need any spiritual connections to do that. Imagine someone that, possibly, cooks for you wants to use spiritual powers to kill you. Nonsense!

Give her time. You broke her psychologically and mentally and it will take a lot of time for that to heal. That's if you don't fall for another clown whenever you are down.

6 Likes

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