obinna58:

Glad it’s coming from a lady
I wasn’t complaining, if that’s what men are created for then don’t you think this topic/thread is invalid

Well I can't really say it's invalid, bc some ladies can't deal with the fact that they have to take care of another womans child, bc they feel no matter how u show them that love as a mother, they can nverr regard u as their mother. And this goes for your gender too, they aren't ready to get married to a single mother either. If u notice the response I gave to the post.i said I can manage him if he has money, if not I don't think I can the stress that comes with it ehnnn no be here ooo

Prettygirl200:
Well I can't really say it's invalid, bc some ladies can't deal with the fact that they have to take care of another womans child, bc they feel no matter how u show them that love as a mother, they can nverr regard u as their mother. And this goes for your gender too, they aren't ready to get married to a single mother either. If u notice the response I gave to the post.i said I can manage him if he has money, if not I don't think I can the stress that comes with it ehnnn no be here ooo

Bla bla bla
Look! As long as the man is financially ok and can take good care of his family a woman will hardly say no
Can’t deal with the fact it’s another woman’s child or the man’s choice to say is she cool enough to take care of my kid, for the woman it’s more like saying no to an opportunity

obinna58:

Bla bla bla
Look! As long as the man is financially ok and can take good care of his family a woman will hardly say no
Can’t deal with the fact it’s another woman’s child or the man’s choice to say is she cool enough to take care of my kid, for the woman it’s more like saying no to an opportunity

Sir we are saying desame thing why are u confusing yourself? I said what I said bc of some women's thought. And am saying if the single father has a lot of money then I will manage him, stop acting like someone that doesn't understand simple English.

Prettygirl200:
Sir we are saying desame thing why are u confusing yourself? I said what I said bc of some women's thought. And am saying if the single father has a lot of money then I will manage him, stop acting like someone that doesn't understand simple English.

She don vex
The strong point here is choice
The man decides the woman follows, I like men who put women in their place responsibly, even buhari on the national television with no shame stated where women belongs

The kitchen and most importantly ze oza room

obinna58:

She don vex
The strong point here is choice
The man decides the woman follows, I like men who put women in their place responsibly, even buhari on the national television with no shame stated where women belongs

The kitchen and most importantly ze oza room

If this is your mentality then I feel sorry for you. Talking about this topic Al still saying that if that single father hasa lot of money as a young lady without a child I will manage him but won't stress myself on his kids, I will just do the little I can do for them. It's the woman's decision at this moment not the man's.

Prettygirl200:
If this is your mentality then I feel sorry for you. Talking about this topic Al still saying that if that single father hasa lot of money as a young lady without a child I will manage him but won't stress myself on his kids, I will just do the little I can do for them. It's the woman's decision at this moment not the man's.

It’s an opportunity

obinna58:

It’s an opportunity

To your sister's right? Nice one!!!

Kobojunkie:
Your response is implied that when a man maltreats a child it is not same as when a woman maltreats a child.... one is more acceptable than the other. Na you talk am.

No ma I did not say that na.
We were talking about marriage here

Brian47:
No ma I did not say that na. We were talking about marriage here

Ofcourse, I am talking here of marriage as well.

Kobojunkie:
Ofcourse, I am talking here of marriage as well.

Okay...
Nobody should maltreat a child.
And women and men are not the same. Ma you're a smart woman you already know this.

Brian47:
Okay...Nobody should maltreat a child.
And women and men are not the same. Ma you're a smart woman you already know this.

It's ok to cling to personal delusions but when attempting to debate, try to step out of your personal delusions so you can argue whatever case you have more effectively.

This new year, please endeavor to get a book on logical/critical reasoning/thinking so you can grow your mind and as such become able to logically analyze your decisions, and the world around you, including your relationships for yourself. I recommend the book Being Logical but any other text that you are more comfortable with will work too. the key is to put into regular(continuous) practice what you learn so you become a more logical being than you are today.

Kobojunkie:
It's ok to cling to personal delusions but when attempting to debate, try to step out of your personal delusions so you can argue whatever case you have more effectively.

This new year, please endeavor to get a book on logical/critical reasoning/thinking so you can grow your mind and as such become able to logically analyze your decisions, and the world around you, including your relationships for yourself. I recommend the book Being Logical but any other text that you are more comfortable with will work too. the key is to put into regular(continuous) practice what you learn so you become a more logical being than you are today.

Ok...
I'll do what you asked and I'll pirate that book later.

Brian47:
Ok... I'll do what you asked and I'll pirate that book later.

It is a good book, and I will pretend that I didn't see that you intend to pirate the book.

No, as another single childless woman, I can’t marry a single father for the same reasons you mentioned. I’m not going to share the burden of raising another woman’s kids. Why should I? Then on top of that you’ll deal with resistance from the children and interference from the mother. Also, it can be a huge financial burden if the man is supporting kids from a previous marriage. However, if he makes a good income, this may not be an issue.

The only exception I can consider dating a single father is if he leaves the children in the mother’s care or in the care of his family. As long as he doesn’t expect me to look after his kids and he’s financially stable, then I can marry him. They’d have to be living long distance with their mom or with his family. He can go there to visit them and send money for their maintenance. They can come to our home for occasional weekends and holidays but I don’t want to live with them full time. We’d have to have a clear agreement that I’m not expected to care for them. Our marriage has to be separate from his duties to his kids by another woman. Otherwise, I couldn’t do it. Being a stepmom is too much of a burden and the situation creates a lot of potential for conflict. I just don’t see the point in adding those extra complications in your life. I just want to be with the man alone and focus on my own kids. I don’t want to have to accommodate another woman’s kids in my life or have to deal with their mom.

I can biko. The kids are innocent. I will raise him or her up in such a way that you won't know am not the biological mom. Watch how those kids will love me back in return. Even baba God will bless me for having such a kind loving heart

nene1:
No, as another single childless woman, I can’t marry a single father for the same reasons you mentioned. I’m not going to share the burden of raising another woman’s kids. Why should I? Then on top of that you’ll deal with resistance from the children and interference from the mother. Also, it can be a huge financial burden if the man is supporting kids from a previous marriage. However, if he makes a good income, this may not be an issue.

The only exception I can consider dating a single father is if he leaves the children in the mother’s care or in the care of his family. As long as he doesn’t expect me to look after his kids and he’s financially stable, then I can marry him. They’d have to be living long distance with their mom or with his family. He can go there to visit them and send money for their maintenance. They can come to our home for occasional weekends and holidays but I don’t want to live with them full time. We’d have to have a clear agreement that I’m not expected to care for them. Our marriage has to be separate from his duties to his kids by another woman. Otherwise, I couldn’t do it. Being a stepmom is too much of a burden and the situation creates a lot of potential for conflict. I just don’t see the point in adding those extra complications in your life. I just want to be with the man alone and focus on my own kids. I don’t want to have to accommodate another woman’s kids in my life or have to deal with their mom.

Exactly. So long as she's alive she can turn those kids against you.

Chee59:

Exactly. So long as she's alive she can turn those kids against you.

Right. The kids will always be loyal to her. She doesn’t even have to turn them against you. They are already naturally against you. Even if she’s not alive, they’ll still be loyal to her. It’s best kids are cared by family members not stepparents. Since men don’t take care of the kids, they shouldn’t have custody of the children bc they will only burden their wife. If the kids aren’t under his custody then it’s okay but otherwise you won’t have peace in your own home.